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Advancing the Conversation on Sexual Assault
Let’s agree on
how to punish it
J ill r iChardson
Our national de-
bate about sexual ha-
rassment and assault
seems to be missing
a bit of nuance. As a
woman who’s been
sexually
harassed
and assaulted many times, here’s
how I see it.
Sexual predators aren’t the
same as pigs. Roy Moore is a
predator. His systematic, frequent
pursuing of teenage girls at a
shopping mall when he was in his
30s shows a pattern of intention-
al behavior. He was after children
too young to consent to sex.
Film producer Harvey Wein-
stein, who systematically en-
trapped women trying to make it
in the film industry, is a predator.
A monstrous one.
Al Franken sounds like a pig. A
pig is the man who stares at your
chest instead of your face when
talking to you. A pig might try to
touch you under the pretense of
being friendly, or joking, or “acci-
dentally” brushing up on you.
The pig might think he’s being
hilarious or just having good fun.
He may even think he’s flattering
you. You should feel grateful he
by
chose you as a woman worthy of
his sexual attention.
The last pig I encountered
smacked my behind. Twice. The
first time it happened,
I didn’t know what to
say. It wasn’t OK, but
what do you say?
As a woman I’m
socialized to always
remain polite. Since I
couldn’t think of an ap-
“And?” he said. He held up one
finger, as if he were making a list
and I’d just given him one item —
but there had to be more.
What? No.
“I didn’t give you permission”
is the only reason I need. But I
added, “And were aren’t dating.”
He nodded, accepting my reasons.
I was enraged. “Don’t touch my
butt” shouldn’t require explana-
tion or justification.
Donald Trump bragged
about assaulting women,
and many women have
come forward to allege he’s
assaulted them, yet he’s in
the White House.
propriate, non-confrontational po-
lite response, I said nothing.
The second time, I was ready.
This wasn’t OK, and I was willing
to risk an unpleasant confronta-
tion.
“Don’t do that,” I said.
“Why not?” the man asked.
“Because I didn’t give you per-
mission,” I snapped back.
There seems to be a spectrum,
from the small-time pig to the
most heinous sexual predator. And
different punishments fit different
crimes. It also matters if the perpe-
trator apologizes, and if he stops
the problematic behavior.
Yet the way we’re haphazardly
applying consequences doesn’t re-
flect the severity of the crime, the
trustworthiness of the evidence, or
the sincerity of the apology.
Donald Trump bragged about
assaulting women, and many
women have come forward to al-
lege he’s assaulted them, yet he’s
in the White House. Roy Moore
pursued teenage girls when he was
an adult, yet he still retained the
support of most Republicans.
Sen. Al Franken, a mere pig by
comparison, resigned his seat after
realizing he was wrong for grop-
ing and kissing women without
their consent.
Actor Kevin Spacey, who
played the president on the TV
show House of Cards, lost his job
after a wave of assault allegations
surfaced against him. But while
Spacey can’t play a president on
TV anymore, a man who openly
bragged about committing assault
still sits in the real Oval Office.
And Clarence Thomas, a man
once accused of serial sexual ha-
rassment, is still on the Supreme
Court.
Our conversation must advance
from simply agreeing to take sex-
ual harassment and assault seri-
ously to agreeing upon a fair and
consistent way to punish it.
OtherWords columnist Jill
Richardson is the author of Recipe
for America: Why Our Food Sys-
tem Is Broken and What We Can
Do to Fix It.