March 17, 2010
'ri'1' jJorilanb (Dbsemer
Birth Experiences Survey
If y ou're a black wom an who gave birth
in Oregon in the last five years, the Interna­
tional Center for Traditional Childbearing
wants to hear your birth story.
Do you think your medical care during
your pregnancy, birth or post-partum expe­
rience could have been im proved?
The ICTC is an A frican-A m erican led
organization that wants to collect local birth
stories to im prove pregnancy and birth ex­
periences for wom en. The nonprofit group
is dedicated to infant m ortality prevention,
breastfeeding prom otion, m idw ifery and
doula training.
The survey can be taken online by visiting
ictcm idw ives.org or you can set up an
appointm ent to take a 10 m inute survey with
an ICTC staff m em ber by phone at 503-
460-9324.
Dear Tamyra:
Families stick together no matter
what and in your case, you have to
be the glue. You may not see it, but
your mother is doing the best she
can with what she has. All you can
do is hang in there, help the best you
can and push yourself harder to
become better and achieve. You
should work out a schedule with
your mother, college and the kids
and be sure to rest and stay fo­
cused. You will get your reward in
the end after you’ve done the right
thing.
Dear Deanna!
I want more out of my current rela­
tionship but I think my past is caus­
ing negativity between us. I have
been known to have more than one
boyfriend and play the field but I’ve
changed. I’m ready to settle down
but my past seems to haunt me on a
regular basis. My boyfriend tells me
he would commit but he’s afraid he
can’t trust me. What can I do to
prove that I’ve changed and can be
trusted? -A nonym ous; Charlotte,
N.C.
A sk
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\
Real People, Real
A n advice colum n know n fo r
its fearless approach to reality
based subjects!
giving you a dose of reality that you
can’t seem to swallow right now.
You’ve shown your boyfriend quite
a few things when you thought he
and others were not looking. The
only thing you can do is stay on the
straight and narrow path in your
relationship, meet his expectations
and demonstrate to him that you’re
on his team seeking longevity and a
future.
Dear Deanna!
My cousin has betrayed me by get­
ting with my ex-boyfriend. We had
a break-up but I felt there always
hope to get back together. I’m hav­
ing a hard time because of the family
issue and now they’re having a baby
together. I’m trying to control my­
self and keep it together because he
was seeing her when he was with
me. I was doing fine and moving on
until he called wanting to have a
fling. I’m tom between seeing him
and telling my cousin. What do I
do? -M iserable But Holding On;
Denver
Dear Anonymous:
Dear Miserable:
People believe that once you’re a If you think things are bad now, go
cheat, you will always be a cheat, ahead and get with him and you’ll
Your lack of care for your morals is have a living nightmare on your
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Dear Deanna!
I have been designated as the
babysitter and caregiver for my
younger brothers and sisters. My
mother started having kids again
afterltum ed 13. Now I’m in college
and I can’t get my homework com­
pleted, I stay tired all the time. I try
to talk to my mother but she is al­
ways fussing about her boyfriends,
my siblings’ fathers and money. I
don't want to quit college or ruin my
relationship but it looks as if that’s
where things are heading. What can
1 do? -T am yra Jackson; On-Line
Reader
Page 9
hands. Whether he’s with your
cousin, a friend or a stranger, you
• had your chance, it didn’t work
out and now he’s onto someone
else. You have enough time to
hold on to your sanity and find a
relationship that's good for you.
Hold your head high and let the
past be the past and although
your cousin has him, realize that
he’s cheating on her but it’s not
with you.
Ask Deanna is written by Deanna
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