May 30,2001
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Page A5
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Family
Mentor to Area Children Says Goodbye
Bi M ichael L eighton
T he P ortland O bserver
Irene Evans, a longtime men­
tor to area children, is saying
her last goodbyes to friends
and acquaintances as she pre-
pares to relocate to New Jer­
sey to be closer to her 86-year-
old mother.
Evans has served as head
teacher at Helping Hands to
about 45 year-round students
over each o f the past 8 years.
She also works with third grad­
ers in a language arts program
at Woodlawn Saturday School
and with Sunday school stu­
dents at St. Andrew Catholic
he to u r Reasons— •------
• ..
M RS
»*•
Irene Evans and Honni, 5, of Emmanuel Temple Church's Helping Hands Development Center, enjoy a Barney book.
Tips About
Teen
Rebellion
L e t ’s
T a lk
Church.
Her efforts on behalf of chil­
dren are legendary.
For
e x a m p le,
w hen
“Barney’s Magical Castle Live
Stage Show” came to Port­
land, the show donated 60 tick­
ets for Evans to distribute to
area children and parents to
share this memorable experi­
ence.
Evans had built a relation­
ship with Lyric Publications by
writing about her students and
sending samples o f their won­
derful work.
The company has donated
Barney-related learning mate­
rials and Wish Bone-related
items over the past two years.
She has a photo bag proudly
displaying her students engaged
in positive activities. Her bag
would become a conversation
piece.
“I have had more people en­
roll their child or volunteer be­
cause the p ictu res I took
showed how involved the stu­
dents were in the educational
and spiritual ta s k s E v a n s said.
If you’re the parent of a teen­
m atically draw the difficulty
ager, chances are you’re dealing
through this scenario:
with a person you’ve never met
Jou may have heard the story
never mind that they’ve been liv­
about the little boy who was watch­
ing with you all their lives. That’s
ing a butterfly struggle to break
what the teenage years are about
out o f a cocoon. Peeling sorry
in large measure, children dedi­ fo r the butterfly, the boy opened
cated to the tasks o f growing up.
the cocoon and set the butterfly
And while this developmental free. But after flying only a few
stage on the path to adulthood
yards, the butterfly fe ll to the
may cause you to think a lot
ground and died. The little boy
about their welfare, your teens
hadn t realized that the butterfly
are probably not doing all that
needed the struggle to gain the
much thinking about you. Fact
strength that would allow it to fly
is, they’re likely behaving in ways
and live.
to distance themselves from the
Letting our kids struggle and
family. Don’t take it personally
make mistakes can be frighten­
it’s not personal.
ing, even when we realize that
While the tone o f the teen years
teens need to find out who they
may throb with tension, under­
are. And in the finding, teen be­
standing what’s going on is part
havior looms as outright rebel­
ofthe solution to working through
lion, often in those very areas we
those years. Positive Discipline
hold most dear. While there are
for Teenagers Resolving Con­
different forms and intensities o f
flic t with Your Teenage Son or
rebellion, note the authors, there
D aughter, w ritten by Jane
are some common teen behav­
Nelsen, Ed.D., and Lynn Lott,
iors, “such as not wanting to be
M.A., M.F.C.C., (Rocklin, CA.
with their families, not wanting
Prima Publishing, 1994), is one
to have clean rooms, and listen­
resource many parents of teens
ing to music parents hate.”
might find revealing. Nelsen is
But parents are people, too!
the mother of seven; Lott the
Common sense can prevail: Just
mother of four.
as you wouldn’t let a toddler
While eschewing permissive
dash into traffic, so parents can
grammatic operations and an parenting on the grounds that it
draw boundaries for teens. Par­
annual budget o f several million ill prepares kids for adulthood,
ents
can say no, counsel the au­
dollars.
the authors offer an approach
thors, but it’s often best to just
Under her untiring leadership, that sometimes seems permis­
say no without an accompanying
the organization prospered, and sive. But in a closer look, the
criticism or lecture. The teen years
sustained the level of service to approach offers a range of tools
are a temporary time of momen­
the community the institution is and skills to help the kids and
tous physical and emotional growth
»^ co g n ized for today.
parents make the bridge from
and development, and although
childhood to young adulthood
most teens would challenge the
while respecting the individuality
assertion, indeed, they are not quite
o f each. The authors make a
yet grownups. For the parents,
distinction between what they
who are, it’s a time to show how
Services and m em ber o f the call “short-sighted parenting,”
qualities such as patience, toler­
L ifespan R espite C are P a rt­ which seeks to control the cur­
ance, respect, and acquired wis­
nership.
rent situation, and “long range
dom play out in family life.
hase 2 o f the R espite parenting,” which aims to help
This column by Karen Lytle
R egistry will focus on teens develop inner strength. The
Blaha is provided as a public ser­
im plem entation: e s­ rnthors recognize how parents’
vice by the Northwest Regional
ta b lish in g an advisory tnxiously
board, walk the fence between
Educational Laboratory, a non­
profit institution working with
dev elo p in g funding and sta ff­ ¡afeguarding their kids and let-
ing
them
make
the
necessary
schools and communities in Alaska,
ing, operating the registry, and
nistakes
so
that
they
can
learn
Idaho,
Montana, Oregon, and
pro m o tin g the services to the
rom
them.
Nelsen
and
Lott
dra-
Washington.
com m unity.
Alliance Honors Cornetta Smith
The Albina Ministerial Alliance
has honored Cometta J. Smith
for her record of distinguished
service to the community.
Tony Hopson, president of
Self Enhancement, Inc. was the
Master of Ceremonies during the
Sunday celebration at Irvington
Covenant Church, 4046 N.E.
Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd. The
event was punctuated by music,
poetry, theater, and reflections.
During her tenure, which spans
30 years, Mrs. Smith advocated
for social services for children
and their families, to make a dif-
ference in their lives.
She worked for and supported
the idea that no one should be left
behind.
As the executive director of
the 50 year-old non-profit alli­
ance, she was responsible for
AMA’s administrative and pro-
Respite Registry Will Assist Caregivers
M
"ultnomah County is
developing a Re-
-spite R eg istry for
careg iv ers.
An occasional break, o r re ­
spite, from the ex trao rd in ary
dem ands o f providing ongoing
care strengthens the sta b ility
o f fam ilies and caregivers.
The R espite registry will in­
crease access to resp ite ser-
v ices through a central point
o f co n tact, increase resp ite re­
sources, and im prove the qual­
ity o f resp ite services.
A cco rd in g to 1997 national
A l l ia n c e f o r C a r e g iv i n g /
A A R P survey, nearly one in
fo u r U .S. households w as in ­
volved in caring for an older
fam ily m em ber o f friend, d e­
v o tin g an average o f 18 hours
per w eek.
“ People who spend a lot o f
tim e providing care som etim es
e x p e rie n c e d e p re s s io n and
feelings o f isolation. The stress
can lead to abuse o r n eglect
o f people in th eir care.
O ften frail elderly o r c h il­
dren w ith d isa b ilitie s ,” states
Lynn G eorge, o f M ultnom ah
C ounty A ging and D isab ility
Jefferson
Plans
Celebration
The first annual Jefferson
High School A lum ni/C om m u-
n ity C e le b ra tio n , S a tu rd a y ,
June 2, from 11 a.m . to 4 p.m .,
will honor the people who built
the sc h o o l’s tradition o f e x ­
cellen ce and being called the
“ School o f C ham pions” and
“ School o f P rid e .”
J e ffe rso n C h o ir and P e r­
form ing A rts D epartm ent stu ­
dents and com m unity m u si­
c ia n s ,
i n c lu d in g
L in d a
H o r n b u c k le
and
J a n is
S c ro g g in s , w ill h o n o r th e
school w ith th eir a rtistic ta l­
ent.
B ooths staffed by local civic
groups will recruit people who
w ant to becom e com m unity
volunteers. G overnm ent agen­
cies w ill d istrib u te info rm a­
tion about the services they
provide.
T ours o fth e school also w ill
be available. Food will be plen­
tiful. A lum ni are encouraged
to w ear their varsity letters,
rin g s, pin s and sw eaters to
this festive netw orking event.
A dm ission is $ 1. To sign up
for a booth or for m ore in fo r­
m atio n , call K athy M uir at
Jefferson High School at 503-
916-5180
I
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