Page A3
JULY 1,1998
(Ehe }Jortkutò (Observer
F a th e r ’s T ears
A F a th e r ’s D ay S to r y of L ove an d P a in
D r . C orrea , S r .
“I want to be happy and free. I
want to go on dates, dance and have
fun. I want to experience the good
times that others experienced in this
big city. My children do not have to
be a detriment to my happiness...”
After nineteen years of being mar
ried to this beautiful and younger
wife, my patient did not know, at
that time, that he was about to expe
rience the worse nightmare of his
life.
Let me share with you this story
o f a father in tears on this Father’s
day. He was a successful business
professional in a another state on
the Bible belt. His presence, charm
and well seasoned demeanor was
the end results o f years o f experi
ence and intellectualism.
Six years early, after a short ill
ness, he gave his last farewell to this
father on this earth. As the only
child in a family of three, his re
sponsibility now, was to take care
of his elderly mother. Due to her
delicate condition, his wife and small
children moved to Oregon. He
stayed a little bit longer to close his
business and then, moved to this
state, to be reunited with his loving
family.
My patient shared that, during
their separation, his estranged wife
started having fun with a younger
man. Dysfunctional and addictive
behaviors took control ofher life. “I
want to be free and happy” was the
main motivation to her decision to
abandon a nineteen year marriage.
With a circle o f friends that be
lieved her self centered story, she
was advised to file a restraining
order based on physical abuse. She
was assured that there in Oregon,
this legal move is well supported
not only by the court, but also the
gender of the judge. This was a
great opportunity to obtain her fast
freedom.
One day my patient, who is a well
known advocate for the family unity
and an advisor for the news media,
received the court’s restraining or
der. Three police escorted him away
from his home, his children and
by
possessions. This man who helped
many to succeed, now was hunted,
humiliated and shamed. In only
twenty minutes, my patient became
homeless.
The day in court arrived. She
dressed up like Miss America. As an
experienced performer, hertearsand
acting were so convincing, that the
court believed her false and untrue
story. There was not any physical
evidence or proof of any kind of
abuse. The case was not substanti
ated by police, medical records or
testimonies from witnesses that at
least, heard the violent abuse hap
pen. The court made their verdict.
The restraining order did not allow
my patient to get close to her, to his
house, to his children, to their school,
to write or to call his children.
The court in this prosperous State
of Oregon omitted a very important
part in their decision. They hear the
story (real or fictional), make their
personal evaluation and decision.
However, without taking into con
sideration the psychological and
emotional condition of the person
who filed the complaint. In the case
of my patient, his wife was diag
nosed in the past as a paranoia-manic-
depressive individual. We respect
the judges for their great knowledge
of the laws. Nevertheless, when it
comes to the future of the family
unity, they lack the expertise of the
Psychiatrist or the Clinical Psycholo
gists. Thus, place them as the initia
tors for the raising statistics in di
vorce and child delinquency.
One month after the court re
straining order was put in affect,
my patient was served with the
divorce papers. The following
month they were in the divorce
court. In 48 days the marriage of
nineteen years was dissolved and
the children became part of the
statistics. Children of divorce be
come broken pieces that no super
glue can put them back together.
However, “she was happy!” One
year later, my patient’s mother,
the one who was his spiritual and
moral support during these chal
lenging and painful times, died of
a failing heart.
I am wondering during this
Father’s Day celebration, how many
fathers who had passed through a
similar predicament, are celebrat
ing theircourt decisions. How many
ofthese fathers are long in to be with
their children and hear the sweet
sounds of; “Hey, daddy, happy
Father’s Day!”? Like in the case of
my patient, how many mothers are
using their children as a weapon
toward the fathers? How many moth
ers have sent their children on vaca
tion to keep them away on Father’s
day? For how long do you believe
the destruction and slugger of the
family unity will continue? How the
personal evaluation of one judge
could help us build a better tomor
row for our families? What is the
roll of God in all of this?
Well, here we are. One more
Father’s Day in front of us. What
kind of advise should I give to this
hurting, grieving man? What words
of encouragement could 1 share with
this roll model and falling hero? We
say that time is the best healer, but
every year we have Father’s day,
birthdays, Christmas and New Years
without the children we adore.. What
a paradox!...
If you are a father reading this
story on Father’s Day. If you are
passing through the same frustrat
ing predicament. If you are experi
encing the pain, hurt and grief from
the separation o f your children, I
have few seeds for success. Look
toward your future. What goes
around comes around. God’s time
table is different to our time table. It
is not important where we came
from, but to where we are going. In
front of you build a Big dream, so
you can conceive it, believe it and
achieve it. Always remember, ifyour
dream is big enough, the facts do not
count.
Ah!... I almost forgot something
very important for you on this
Father's Day. I understand you. You
are not alone. In this story I am the
Doctor, that patient, that profes
sional, that father in tears on this
Father’s Day..., alone.
Nominations sought for General George C.
Marshall Leadership Award-1998
Vancouver M ayor Royce E.
Pollard and the Marshall Leader
ship Award Com mittee are seek
ing nominations for V ancouver's
an n u al G e n e ra l G e o rg e C.
Marshall Public Service Leader
ship Award. According to Pol
lard, “The leadership principles
and dedication to country which
General Marshall stood for must
never be lost. Through this pro
gram we intend to ensure that
those principles and values are
passed on to future generations
of our citizens.”
The award recipient will have
the o p p o rtu n ity to to u r the
Marshall Foundation in Lexing
ton. Virginia, visit W ashington,
D.C., meet with local elected rep
resentatives, and participate in
the Leadership Clark County Pro
gram.
T he M arsh a ll L e a d e rs h ip
Award program aims to acknowl
edge, encourage and support po
tential leaders in our community.
The award was started in 1989 to
recognize a young person’s com
mitment to public service and
demonstrated leadership poten
tial.
To qualify for the award, a can
didate must be an actively in
volved Clark County resident, 35
years o f age or under, and have
completed a four year college
degree. Selection is based on
demonstrated leadership ability,
commitment to public service,
academic achievement and poten
tial for an ongoing leadership role
in public service.
The 1998 recipient will be an
nounced by Mayor Pollard on
Thursday, Oct. 8. There will be a
public ceremony in the George C.
Marshall on V ancouver’s O ffic
ers Row on W ednesday, Nov. 4.
General Marshall, Nobel Peace
Prize recipient in 1953 and au
thor o f the post WW11 Marshall
P lan , w as co m m an d e r o f
Vancouver Barracks in the mid-
1930’s. This award was created
in his honor in cooperation with
the General George C. Marshall
Foundation.
Last October, Charlene Ryan,
the 1997 Marshall Award recipi
ent. visited Washington D C. and
the Marshall Foundation. While
in our nation’s capital, she was a
guest at a formal, black-tie Asso
ciation for the United States Army
banquet. Several Secretaries of
State and generals, including
fo rm er C h ie f o f S ta ff C olin
Powell, were present.
Nomination forms can be picked
up at the following locations:
Greater Vancouver Chamber of
Commerce, Fort Vancouver Re
gional Library (Clark County) lo
cations, Clark College and WSU.
Return nomination forms to the
M ayor’s Office (PO Box 1995,
Vancouver. WA 98668/210 E.
13th St., Vancouver, WA 98660).
Nominations can be submitted by
individuals or organizations by the
Monday, Aug31 deadline(orpost-
marked by this date).
Previous award recipients are:
Cindy Gibbon, John M cllvain,
Steven Dearborn, Douglas Ses
sio n s, P au la M artin , D arin
Atteberry, Shawna Burkholder,
Thomas Hagley, Jr., and Charlene
Ryan.
S tu d y V o l u n t e e r s N e e d e d
HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE
African American volunteers are needed fo r a 30 week hypertension research
medication study. If you are 13 years or older with high blood pressure and in general
good health, you may qualify. Volunteers will be thoroughly screened by the
research team and their private physicians consulted. Study medication,
study-related clinic visits and testing will be provided at no charge for these who
qualify. Reimbursement for travel will be given. For information call 228-3217,
Mon.-Thur. 9 to 4, Fri.- 9 to 1.
Explore the secrets of Officers Row
Fourth and fifth grade students are invited to experience daily life
F o u rth an d f ifth g ra d e s t u
d e n ts a re in v ite d to e x p e r i
e n c e d a ily lif e at and a ro u n d
h i s t o r i c F o rt V a n c o u v e r in
t h e d e c a d e s fr o m 1 8 5 0 -
1 8 9 0 . T h e c la s s m e e ts J u n e
29 th o u g h J u ly 3, fro m 9a m
to n o o n , at th e U .S . A rm y
H e a d q u a r t e r s B u i ld i n g at
O f f ic e r s R ow .
T h ro u g h d ra m a , a r t, to y s
from th e p a s t, g u e s t s p e a k
ers an d fie ld tr ip s , s tu d e n ts
w ill learn ab o u t V a n c o u v e r’s
ro o ts an d rich p a s t. T hey
w ill g e t to kn o w th e re al
G e n e ra l G ra n t, le a rn a b o u t
N a tiv e A m e ric a n s and b a r n
Fire Marshal
encourages safe
fireworks
practices
Fourth o f July fireworks will go on sale, and
may be purchased from approved stands and
used, from Sunday, June 28, at noon through
M onday, July 6, at noon. Vancouver Fire M ar
shal Rick Atkins reminds parents to ensure that
children use only legal fireworks purchased from
approved stands.
By state law, fireworks sales are limited to
people age 16 and over. Sellers must require
proof o f age with a d riv er’s license or photo
identification card issued by a school or govern
ment.
To prevent injuries, the fire marshal encour
ages parents to closely supervise their children
during the upcom ing fireworks season. “ It’s
im portant for parents to be present when fire
works are ignited, and to ensure that the m ateri
als are lit in an open area away from homes,
vehicles and other com bustibles,” says Atkins.
He adds that parents should teach children to:
*remain a safe distance away from the fire
works
•read and follow all warnings
•never try to re-light fireworks that have
not fully functioned, and
•keep a bucket of water nearby
Very young children should not be allowed to
use fireworks. Because o f the intense heat, even
sparklers can be unsafe if used improperly.
Hospital em ergency rooms treated an esti
mated 7,600 fireworks related injuries in 1996.
About 40% o f those injuries were burns to the
hands, eyes and head.
Children under age 15 sustained about one
third o f the injuries.
A good additional source o f information about
fireworks safety can be obtained on the Internet
a t : w w w .gov/w sp/fpb/psi.htm .
C lin ical R e s e a r c h G r o u p o f O regon
s to rm in g at P e a rs o n F ie ld .
S ig n up at B a g le y C e n te r,
6 9 6 - 8 2 1 9 , o r M a rs h a ll C e n
te r . 6 9 6 -8 2 3 6 .
F o r m e re d e t a i l s , c a ll
c l a s s c o - i n s t r u c t o r s M in a
M i l l i g a n at 6 9 4 - 6 7 4 1 o r
M a r ia W r ig h ts o n a t 6 9 4 - '
1229.
1221 S.W . Y a m h ill, S u ite 3 0 3
P o rtla n d , O r e g o n 9 7 2 0 5
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