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facing. Losing their virginity to boys who do
Teenage
Sexuality
not care, becoming pregnant, and hieing la­
beled by their peers are some of the risks. At
this day and time teenage sex is becoming d ie
norm, he idea of not having sex until mar­
riage is becoming a joke. When parents tell
their teenage daughters not to sex and do not
explain why, the teen may rebel and say yes to
sex. The solution to this problem found in
Girls: Just say NotNow,weowe itto young
people to own up to the fact that sexual feel­
ings are normal, and that desire can be very
B y
D o n i t a
L i n c o l n
pleasurable(p.59). Parents today have this
problem of painting a false picture to their
I n an attempt to understand teenage sexual behavior, low self-esteem, peer pressure, and
chddren. This picture is one that tries to put
parental and marital status were reported as being the three main reasons why female
fear in children about sex instead of under­
Donila Lincoln
adolescent have sex during their teenage years. As reported in Psychology Today and the
standing. They tell their children sex is wrong
Journal of Marriage and The Family, teenagers are faced with physical and emotional
and some emphasis on the Bibles teachings of sinfulness and punishment. Some
consequences of sex. Single-parent homes tend to have a higher rate of teenage sexuality
parents are so afraid for their chdd that they try to put a mask on the issue of sex. This
than those of two-parent homes. In turn, lack of communication played a major role in
is where the mistake is made because kids will simply rebel. Cassel suggests, promoting
the problem of teens having sex. It is very im portant to educate young girls about this
' Not Now as a means of gudt and unsure feelings. Tins way die experience of sex may­
problem earlier m life, before junior high. The more aware and the sooner girls are taught
be postponed until she has a better understanding of sex and is old enough to handle the
about sex the better understanding they7 will have. This will help teenagers to seriously
emotional and physical aspects of it, then it will be a more positive experience. If not
consider the consequences of sex.
positive, the teenage girl will be much wiser. If teenage girls decide not to wait untd
In Sociology fourth edition, chapter seven on Sexualities mentioned a very im portant
issue regarding Adolescent Sexuality. In a study of junior high school students in
Indianapolis, 55 percent had already had sexual intercourse-half theboys by age 13, and
intercourse can be experienced with someone whom they love, trust, and whom diey can
talk to, then it may end in a frustrating and regretful experience. Promoting abstinence
is just as good, but young girls need to be educated before anydung else.
by age 15 for tl le girls; 1991 \ Being sexually active for the girls was associated with low
Parental marital status has an effect on adolescent sexual behavior. In the Journal of
self-esteem.
Marriage and The Famdy, 1987, Feb-Nov., an article by Susan New-comer and Richard
First of all, let us look at a teenage girls self-esteem level. Young girls may feel insecure
about their physical appearance a great deal. They may feel like the boys do not like them
because of their outside appearance. Teenagers do not always focus in on what a person
is like on the inside. Girls with low self-esteem may feel if they give into the boys sexual
wants then they will be accepted and liked. The teen girls may then feel good about
themselves because someone is paying attention to them, but it could cause a problem
for the girl. She may realize that sex is all tl le boy wanted from the start. She will obviously
feel taken and hurt. Being so young teen girls may not be able to deal with the outcome
of their sexual behavior. In Psychology Today in an article called Gills: Just say Not
Now, by Lynn Crawford Cook, sex educator Carol Castle stated I believe that teens
under sixteen are simply too young to handle their emotional and physical consequences
Udry talked about diis issue. Data from a panel study of w-hite virgin adolescents first
interviewed in junior high was given in the article. This data stated, for girls, those who
are with both original parents of both times have lower rates of transition to coitus than
any other category. It also said that those girls who changed to single-modier households
composition where significantly more likely to make transition to intercourse in the two
year interval than girls in continuous both natural-parent households( 1987). In two-
parent homes, were there is a great amount of stability the teaching of strong morals,
values, self-respect, early intercourse is not likely, ^ h e n a home is disrupted with divorce
or marital problems it cause adolescents to “rebel. They may begin to feel that the
problems widiin the home are their fault. Teens may turn to peers for emotional support
that is lacking in the home at the time of the problems. They may become very intimate
of sexi 1989). This is a very good point because adolescents do not always stop and
in the process.
analyze the situation, and see w hat the best choice for them will be.
Just having one parent to watch an adolescent is a difficult, supervision becomes a
Teen pressure also has a lot to do with teen girls being sexually active. Girls may be told
problem as well as the lack of communication. Teenage females tend to feel reluctant to
by their peers, every body is doing it, you will be cool if you do it, or it feels good. These
things could have a big influence on girls minds. Boys may even say to them, if you love
me you will do it, like they really know what love is at twelve and fifteen years of age. At
the ages of twelve and fifteen girls are naive; they do not realize die risks they may be
discuss their sexuality and problems with sex when living in a single-male home. Anodier
problem is the behavior of a single-parent; if a parent is showing him/herself as
promiscuous the child w ill copy die behavior and think it is acceptable. To reiterate,
parental/m arital status as well as behavior has a great deal to do widi the behavior of
teenagers and their understanding of sex.
yes.
D igging
D ow n
D eep
Another question is raised, do teens care enough about themselves to say no? 1 eens do
care, but, from their perspective the question is not valid. They see the question from a
different angle. To teens the question is, why should we say no when there isnt anything
to say yes to? Many parents, teachers, and community leaders are trying to teach teens
to just say no, but, again, with so many things to just say no to, teens wonder w hat can
diey say yes to that wall be of equal pleasure as what teens should say no to. For example;
teens are told a lot of times to get a jo b , and they receive rebukes when they do not. When
they try to get a job they are rejected because they dont have expenence. How are teens
By Sherrelle Penn
expected to get a job when everyone hiring wants them to have experience? Job rejections
lead teens to return to the quick sourceof making Mo Money and selling Mo Drugs.
In todays society alcohol,drugs, teen pregnancy, and gang violence are popular prob­
lems among adolescents. Society portrays diese problems as affecting teens mainly in the
Teens know diey will not be rejected when they sell drugs. Making quick money keeps
teens from hearing the message that wBal they are doing is dangerous.
Black Community. On die contrary, these are major problems affecting adolescents
For every problem there is a solution. Teens need an environment free of manipulation
everywhere.
by friends a« well as the media. Adolescents need to be guided and given alternatives after
The decision of whether to say yes or no to these problems is becoming a part of teens
diey say no. By having alternatives teens feel someone understands their need for being
everyday lives. Unfortunately more and more teens are saying yes instead of no. Why
active and having fun. Teens inwardly desire to be accepted by peers, parents, teachers
dont teens just say no? A simple answer is peer pressure. However, the main problem
is die reasoning behind die teens decision to say yes. Tlirough television and friends teens
and community leaders.
minds are manipulated. Subliminallv diese adolescent minds are told it is alright to say
Teens feel diey need aw ay to be different. Unfortunately a lot of them live dangerously
yes. They are taught diat just saying yes will lead to Mo Money, and quick pleasure.
to lie different. If their role models prove there is a better w ay to be unique then a lot of
Unfortunately. these m anipulated minds are not shown the end disaster in just saying
the troubles and problems faced today will change for die better.
3 rictroriolion
August 1992
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