Hage
l'he Portland O bserver-’Noveniber 14, 1990
HERS
BY C.V, BROOKS
OPINION
and making arrangem ents to pay her
bills, she simply doesn’t open her bills.
As if not opening the envelope that is
stamped on the outside of it “ past d u e ”
will go away. As if by not opening the
letter, she will never have to pay any and
all o f her debts. I know that she realizes
that she will, sooner or later, have to
come to terms with her creditors, but she
has dug herself into such a big hole, I
d o n ’t think that she is able to clim b out
of it. Y et for her I think that there is a lot
of em barrassm ent and shame in the fact
that she is not able to manage her funds
from. Everything was taken care o f by
her parents. She just w asn’t happy. She
then became obsessed with her weight
and bulim ia set in. She has been battling
this disease for some time now.
My friend never liked herself
very much and instead o f facing her
problem s, she avoided them by eating
and making friends with people who she
wanted to be like: people who were
rich, happy, thin, and seem ingly had it
all. And why shouldn’t she have these
things? She, too, com es from a “ good”
family. They are wealthy. They are
invited to the best social
functions in town.
^let*ier -vour '‘*e *s intertwined in larger
She w anted to be so
m uch like them and
issues facing the country or if family
existence.
w
so much a part of
or money matters dominate your life,
S tr a n g e ly B
them that when some
enough, have found B
type of metamorpho­
how you deal with the stress that
that son itim es how
sis that would make
accompanies these things can mean the
we choc e to handle
h e ra p a rto f this life­
difference between a well-balanced life and
stress oi / produces
style didn’t occur,
she tried to end her
addnioi . and unin-
an unstable and unhappy existence.
tentiona pressures.
valuable life.
You sc coping means
My friend has always
had a perception o f herself that w asn’t
dilTeren hings to different people. Some
properly. And once she calls to make a
real. She has avoided that person for so
people 1 ;e to exercise, some like to eat.
paym ent schedule it will be an adm it­
long and has fought that part of her
Some people prefer to w ithdraw into
tance that she is incapable at this point in
because she doesn ’ t w ant to be different.
her life and being places on a schedule,
them sel' es, others seek group therapy.
She doesn’t want to be an individual.
Throug whatever m eans they use, they
like a child on a weekly allowance, will
She wants to be like everyone else. To
think th. * it helps them to contend with
only confirm w hat I think she already
fit into the right sorority, to wear the
the issu hat is in front o f them. O r at
knows about herself. But at the same
“ rig h t” clothes, to drive the “ b est”
best it h-.s a temporary soothing affect.
time, w hat a relief she will feel once she
looking car.
Likewise , there are many ways o f cop­
confronts her problems and debtors and
I told my friend a long time ago
ing wit, stress and it does not always
makes good on her debts.
and my advice still stands the same
mean handling it properly. For a lot o f
Avoidance also has a way of
today, that if she stopped avoiding who
making people not look at them selves
people a ridancc seem s to be the choice
she really is and confront the problems
method
realistically. 1 have a friend that tried to
that she had created because o f it, maybe
com m it suicide a couple of weeks ago.
. om any Americans do not like
confron irons and by simply avoiding
She's been so unhappy with her life for
she would begin to heal. M aybe she
such a long time, that at the ripe old age
would begin to see herself in a different
certain tuations, they think that they
will never have to face the underlying
light and just maybe, she would finally
of 24, she decided to end it all by taking
an overdose o f prescribed medicine.
be able to find some self-worth.
issues at the root of their stress. A void­
Here is a young adult who, when
The same things people use to
ing the issues is unhealthy because a l­
safeguard against stress, sim ultaneously
though it is out o f mind, it doesn’t mean
I was younger, I wished that 1 could
causes stress that we are trying to avoid.
the problem has ju st vanished and will
change places with. She has a prestig­
never re ippear. And like I stated previ­
ious family, a loving family. A nice
Every situation and every issue that we
home
and
expensive
cars.
She
was
face good or bad has a certain am ount of
ously, ii w ill only produce additional
showered
with
just
about
anything
that
stress involved. So don’t try to avoid it.
pressure. O ut o f curiosity, 1 wonder
how many readers have bill collectors
she wanted. She never had to worry
Instead, use it to your advantage. W ork
pursuing you? I have a friend who re­
about her family not being able to pay
harder to alleviate stress by letting it
ceives b Is that are past due alm ost eve­
the bills on time or worried about where
m otivate you to look at the factors af­
ryday. Instead o f phoning her creditors
her college tuition was going to com e
fecting your life.
The present threat of war.
Homele. ,ness. A declining economy.
Crim e. Pressures of the job. Racism.
The d.sintegration o f the family.
Drugs.. Vith so many crises in our lives,
albeit if e w orld, it is no w onder that so
many p ople have trouble coping with
stress u lay.
Whether your life is intertwined
in large issues facing the country or if
family or money matters dom inate your
life, hov your deal with the stress that
accompanies these things can
mean the difference be­
tween
well-bal-
I II I
an ced li e a n d a n u n - »
stable a id unhappy B
i
to learn how to relax mentally. People
can
still be mentally working while
Coping with stress is very diffi­
participating
in various activities and
cult for some individuals. The inability
still
be
tensed.
Some of the symptoms
to deal with stress may lead to drug or
related
to
stress
are backaches, fatigue,
child abuse, alcoholism , withdrawal
teeth
grinding,
tension
in the neck and
socially and em otionally, or displaced
back.
Sometimes,
doctors
prescribe drugs
aggression. Com m unications between
to
people
to
help
them
relax,
but that
people, especially in relationships, stops
only leads to another problem: depend­
when stress takes control.
ency. I am not an advocate o f drug use
How do you cope with stress?
to help people relax o r decrease tension.
The way people deal with various stresses
People have the power within them ­
during their adult years isdeterm ined, to
selves to control their individual
a gread degree, by what happened to
destinies and lives. One way that
them during their childhood. Models,
_ J ’ve learned to “ chill o u t”
such as parents, can also deter--,
mentally is to spend hours
mine how an individual copes
aying across my bed lis-
when the world is about tc
t is impossible to go an entire
ening to music from
crumble (in their mind))
around them. It is impos-J
ial periods of my life,
lifetim e without stress, high
sible to go an entire life-)
usic
like the Isley
dram a, or confusion. I f people
rothers, the Delphon-
time w ithout stress, high
want to be healthy emotionally
cs, and Gil Scott-Heron,
drama, or confusion. Ill
and psychology, they had better
also turn off my an-
people want to be healthy
learn to start understanding
iwering maching and
emotionally and psychol-j
ignore the outside world,
ogy, they had belter leai
stress and learning how to make
here have been times
to start understanding
it w ork for them.
here I’ve stayed in the
stress and learning how tc
ouse all weekend without
make it work for them. People ir
acknowledging the outside
my life tell me that nothing seems“
to bother or upset me. My disposition is -
world or leaving in order to re­
basically mellow. 1 rarely display a
enjoyable. I love working in television,
gain my psychological balance. It’s not
great deal of emotion and I’ve also been
so much coping with the stress o r daily
but there are those who can not envision
accused o f being too calm. Some would
them selves working in such an intense
real i ties I ’m con fronted w i th , I j ust need
go so far as to say that I’ve a stress-free
environm ent. It’s fun to me. Now,
time and space to heal spiritually.
existence, but this is not true. I have
working as a brain surgeon, police, or an
Another factor that might help
stress in my life like every human being,
undertaker is another story. I couldn’t
people cope with stress is for them to try
but the way I handle stress is the key to
deal with the stesses associated with that
worrying about elements they can con­
type o f work. For athletes, stress or
trol. There is nothing I can do about the
my sanity. I find it easy to deal with the
stresses associated with my employment,
pressure can enhance performance.
M iddle East situation, racist attitudes,
W hen fam iliar ways o f han­
relationships with people, and my fam ­
an economic recession, or the stock market
dling stress fail, people have a tendency
ily. Before I stress out over an issue that
for that matter. However, I can control
to gel depressed, frustrated, and w ith­
may evolve during the course o f a given
my attitude and how I react to these
day, I ask m yself if the event or reality is
draw socially as mentioned. Some people
realities. You can ’t control the length of
the worst thing that has ever happened to
eat less, eat more, or lose hope that a
your life, but you can control its width
solution can work out. If people could
me? Chances are, the reality or event is
and depth. You can ’t control the con­
put the same energy into solutions that
very nominal com pared to the way I
tour o f your face, but you can control its
they spend on stressing out, then maybe
grew up in the nation’s capital. Further­
expression. You can’t control the weather,
more, nothing can be worse than losing
we would have a healthier world. People
but you can control the atmosphere, but
need to learn how to relax and “ chill
both of my parents before the age of
you can control the atmosphere o f your
fourteen. Nothing could ever hit me
o u t” . There are several types o f simple
mind. W hy worry about things you
ways to relax: biking, sex, walking,
with that type of impact again. A few
c a n ’t control when you can keep your­
hiking, swim m ing, and gardening are
friends suggest that my thinking or ra­
self healthy controlling the things that
physical ways to relax, but people need
depend on you...
BY LLLYSSESTL'CKER» JR.____
tionale is morbid o r gross, but it works
for me. I use my parents’ deaths to set
my tolerance level for coping with stress
and adversity. In many instances, most
stress-related circum stances are self-
inflicted or even worse, not as bad as
you make them out to be in your mind.
A stress-related predicam ent can be, in
some cases, only as bad as the thoughts
you’re thinking. You are what you
think. On the other hand, what one
person finds stressful, someone else finds
I
Portland Observer
THE LOCKER ROOM
Some things in sports to wonder about
bv Aaron Fentress
As an avid sports fan I often find
m yself caught up in the triumphs, trials
and tribulations o f those involved in
various sports. For som e the road is
rough and unfair. For others the bumpy
road is one they paved themselves. For
others the road seems to only lead to
better tilings. Here are some little pieces
o f food for our thoughts around the
sports vorld today.
W h a t was B u ste r D ouglas
th in k in g ? How can a man who knocked
out M ike Tyson tum in such a bad
show ing eight m onths later. A fter
proclaim ing that it wasn't a fluke, James
"Bubb'e butt" Douglas showed up to his
title defense against Evander Holyfield
only ti m ake it back to his dressing
ro o m b fore the Domino Pizza man had
arrivec S20 million buys an awful lot
o f piz?
But not much respect. Dou­
glas e r larrassed himself, the sport and
all tho -c who backed him. If he had any
consci ence he would donate most of his
purse ' the Jenny Craig clinic then
purch? his own wing and stay awhile.
» ot ro d not so hot. During the
o lf-se on the C leveland C avaliers
signci >iwaid Hot Rod W illiams to a
$5 mi : >n a year contract. W illiams is
currcr
u.e highest paid athlete in e i­
ther b a . eetball, football or baseball. He
makes r ore than Michael Jordan, Magic
Johns-
Joe M ontana, Ryne Sandberg
andR , key Hi nderson. But unlike those
player us! mentioned Williams fails to
lead tl-F NBA in any statistic. In fact
W illiat s e i t be found on any of the
NBA eado: boards except in blocked
shots v. icir n is ranked 13»h. What
w a sC R v e la n i thinking?
' h a t is th e sp o rts w orld in
Cleve! id th in k in g ? In addition to the
bumb! 4s if the C avalit the Browns
aren't 1 iking too mui h like rocket sci-
cni i „’i •
it vela id Browns owner
A n M ? ... n x en tly tired head coach
Bud C, -on after only a year and a half
on the job. N eedless to say the Browns
arc a
•<• ; 7 ' m is it the C arson’s
fault? Remember, Carson did guide the
Browns all the way to the AFC cham pi­
onship game last year. This season the
Browns offensive line features two frec-
agents, a twelfth round draft pick and a
Plan B acquisition. Only one starter
returned from last seasons team. C on­
sequently Brown's quarterback Bernie
Kosar often finds him self on his back.
Maybe Modell should hire some line­
men before he fires his coach. Just a
thought.
Jo se is still O kay. Despite his
lackluster perform ance in this years
world series Jose "one for tw elve'
Canseco is still Okay. In my book. Even
though I kind o f ripped him in my recent
article concerning the world series I
have no doubts that he is as good a
baseball player in the game today.
Canseco is the first player ever to hit 40
homeruns and steal 40 bases in a single
season. No one in baseball possess
Canseco’s combination of speed power
and defensive abilities. Now if he can
only get more than one hit in the world
series.
A m odel o f h e a rt, B ernard King.
After tearing up his knee four years ago
Bernard king has regained his old form
that made him one o f the most feared
scorers in the NBA. King is currently
averaging 31.5 points, second highest
in the NBA ahead of Michael Jordan's
29.3. Imagine if the New York Knicks
still had King to go along with Pat
Ewing.
W h e re 's S u g ar Ray ? It's time
for Sugar Ray Leonard to put up his
dukes and prove him self the champion
he so dearly wants everyone to think he
is. After Leonard's unbelievable defeat
of Marvin Hagler in April of 87' Leonard
has lost respect in the boxing world by
fig h tin g D onny L aL o n d , T h o m as
Hearns and Roberto Duran. LaLond
and Duran were no match for Leonard
while Hearns knocked Leonard on his
butt twice only to sec Leonard sneak
away with a questionable draw. What
Leonard should do to regain respect and
go out on top is to fight Hearns a
third time. W hip his butt then fight the
youngster M ichael Nunn. If Leonard
can beat Nunn he will prove that he isn't
a washed up old fighter just fighting
people he knows he can beat for money.
He will prove him self the best middle
w eight in the world at the age of 35.
W h a t if M agic w ere a coach.
W o u ld n 't th a t be a tric k ? W ith die
Lakers sitting on a pitiful 1 -4 record, as
o f last Tuesday, the Lakers have to start
w ondering w here the M agic went.
Looking at the roster the Lakers arc as
strong as they have ever been since
Kareem Abdul Jabbar started to fade in
1987. The off-season acquisitions of
Terry Teaglc and Sam Perkins spruced
up the Laker bench while Vlade Divac
has more than done his job at center
averaging 15 points and 10 rebounds, a
game. As for Magic he's averaging his
usual M VP numbers o f 22 points and 15
assists. So what's the problem ? For one
thing the rest of the W est has caught up
to the Lakers. They are not old or un-
talcntcd they are just in better company.
But they shouldn't be 1-4. Maybe the
Lakers need another coaching change.
Maybe people are realizing that Pat
Riley was good and it wasn't just the
talent he had on his roster. If the Lakers
continue their losing ways first year
coach Mike Dunleavy could be fired by
mid-season. Laker ow ner Jerry Busse
will cither hire back Pat Riley ( w ouldn’t
that be a Hollywood story) or he will
turn to Magic Johnson to double as a
player and a coach. If any player in the
NBA could do it it would be Magic. His
understanding o f the gam e is well docu­
mented as his ability to relate to his
teammates.
During the sum m er Magic made
an appearance on the Arscnio Hal 1 show
where Hall brought up the possibly o f
Magic becoming a player/coath. Magic
said he w ouldn't necessarily want to
take on that responsibility but "would if
it meant winning a cham pionship," For
the Lakers it may com e down to that.
Knicks take on the Blazers tonight
Newman recently called his former team­
mates a bunch of backstabbers. When
questioned about who, he simply said
that it w asn’t the “ white guys” !
•
f
9 t
'
» J9t * • • * x* -
• » • •
anything. The kids were scared, and a
couple o f them w erecrying.” Calvin
was one o f a number o f passersby who
stopped to help safely rescue the chil­
dren, ranging in age from two to four
years, who were on their way from vis­
iting a pumpkin farm in Racine, WI.
W hiel the bus filled up with smoke,
Calvin, who jumped up in the bus, handed
down the children to the teacher and
others helping.
PATRICK EWING
BY ULLYSSES TUCKER, JR
.Patrick Ewing and the New York
Knicks invade M emorial Coliseum to­
night at 7:30 p.m. The Knicks are coached
by former Oregon product Stu Jackson.
A lso on the Knicks coaching staff is
Paul Silas, a m ember o f three NBA
Cham pionship teams (Boston and Se­
attle) and veteran of sixteen NBA sea­
sons. Rum or has it in New York that
Silas is actually coaching the team in
terms o f respect from players. Silas,
who also served as a head coach (80-83)
in San Diego and as an Assistant with
the New Jersey Nets, is one of the most
com petitive people in the league. W hat
G M /V P A1 Bianchi was thinking about
when he bypassed Silas as the top man is
beyond the comprehension of most league
experts. Some say its the same thought
process that provoked him to trade for
Kiki V andew eghcor(from Portland) a l­
lowed free-agent sharp-shooter Johnny
Newman to slip away (Charlotte Hor­
nets) without compensation. The Knicks
should have re-signed Newman long
before his contract expired and many
New Yorkers arc still crying over the
Rod Strickland trade to San Antonio.
$;<_AS Assistant Coach
Perhaps Bianchi will realize, af­
ter the Knicks are bounced from the
early rounds o f the play-offs, that his
team will never flourish under the helm
of Stu Jackson and give Silas a chance,
that’s if he is not rem oved first. Silas
deserves another shot as a head coach.
Hcros come in all shapes and
sizes. Mack Calvin, the prc-Spud W ebb
Mugsy Bogucs-sizcd former AB A/N B A
star and A ssistant coach with the M il­
w aukee Bucks proved that recently. He
saw smoke and flames billow ing out
from under a school bus while driving
south on Interstate 94 in Milwaukee and
assisted in rescuing 68 children from the
bus without anyone getting injured.
" I t was a gut situation,” said
Calvin. “ We were evacuating the kids
(from the M ilwaukee YMCA Day Care
Center) as quickly as we could. It was a
situation where you don’t fear for your
life or think o f the bus exploding or
t
lAML
I
BILL LAIMBEER
“ I just felt that I’d helped a situ­
ation that needed help,” Calvin said. ‘ T
was in a situation where I was able to
help someone. I feel real good about
it.”
“ It is very difficult straight quotes
from members of the Detroit Pistons,
defending NBA Champions. After the
Blazers outplayed them last weekend,
Bill “ Flop” Laimbcer was asked by
The Locker Room if Portland was a
stronger team than the ones they beat in
the NBA Finals last year. “ It’s the same
team ,” he replied. W hat about the iin-
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