Page 2-"The Portland Observer-August 1, 1990
HFRR OPINION
Do Not Believe Everything You Hear
About People: Rumors
By VICKIE HUGHES
“ Look at all these rumors sur
rounding me every day...I can’t take it
no more...” Words sung by Club Nou
veau in a song called “ Rumores” jok
ingly reminds us that rumors are every
where. Unfortunately, rumors are a part
of our daily lives. Fortunately, most
rumors we hear are not even true. But
this characteristic is what makes rumors
what they really are. Rumors are specu
lations about people, places, or things.
Rumors are not facts, but mere hearsay.
How do they get started, and more
importantly, who starts them?
Personally, I feel that rumors
are started by those who have nothing
better to do or those who spend time
feeling jealous of others. Often, rumors
are started maliciously to hurt others.
Rumors often begin as a conscious ef
fort to destroy someone else’s character,
social standing, or emotional well-being.
Rumors can also develop from
everyday conversations when someone
says something and someone else mis
interprets what was said. I’m sure that
we are all familiar with the game we
played as children. The initiator of the
game whispered something into a child’s
ear. That child passed on the informa
tion to the next child. This process
continued until the last child received
the information. The last child repeated
the information out loud. By the time
the information got to the last person,
the information was so distorted it could
not even be recognized as the original
statement Something went wrong dur
ing the communication process. In each
case there was a breakdown of commu
nication between the speaker and the lis
tener. The breakdown of communica
tion present in this popular game carries
over into real-life situation. Perhaps we
all need to sharpen our listening skills.
Misinterpreted information can hurt many
people in the long run.
Rumores can be harmful to
people in work situations. Office gossip
about a person’s job performance or
social behavior away from the office
takes on the form of rumors and can pre
vent a person from getting a promotion,
raise, or recognition. Gossip filters up
from those in entry-level positions all
the way up to those in upper manage
ment positions. An employee may be
seen at a social function that another
employee is attending. The employee is
extremely drunk and acting like a total
fool. When this information reaches the
office, the employee’s behavior is viewed
as inappropriate social behavior. Al
though this incident occurred away from
work, it still has a negative impact on the
person’s reputation at work.
Rumors can ruin relationships
with family members, friends, or part
ners. The most common rumors I hear
are the ones where one person is sup
posed to be cheating on the other. And
these rumors spread quickly around the
community. Let me remind you that
rumors are speculations about people
and their behavior.
If we see someone out in public
with someone we are not accustomed to
seeing them with, the person is auto
matically labelled as someone who is
“ cheating” on his/her partner. How do
we know that the person seen with them
is not a relative, friend, or co-worker?
Yet, our minds start working, we put
two and two together, and thus begins a
rumor as we tell another person what we
have seen or heard. And I’ve noticed
that rumors spread even faster if we tell
someone not to tell anyone else. The
rumor spreads like a disease. And it al
ways seems that the person who is the
subject of the rumor is the last to find out
about the rumor. Amazing!
Twisted rumors are the sickest
of all. Again, our listening skills are
lacking in many instances. Let me share
a disturbing rumor with you that devel
oped 4-5 y ears ago. A friend of mine got
married shortly after our college gradu
ation. During the Christmas holidays,
my friend was killed in a car accident as
she was driving to work. Her husband
called a few of her friends to let those
close to her know what has happened.
A year later, 1 was talking to a
girl who graduated with us. She lived in
another part of the country than I did at
the lime. She, too, had heard of my
friend’s death. However, I became aware
of the fact that the circumstances of my
friend’s death had transformed into an
ugly rumor that had travelled all over
the country. Here’s the story that his girl
heard: my friend’s husband was in his
law school class (he was indeed in law
school) and my friend was home alone.
The doorbells rang and when she opened
the door, she found an old boyfriend
standing outside with some flowers for
her. She invited him in and while he was
inside, this old boyfriend killed her.
After hearing this rumor, I cried. My
friend was not even around to defend
herself. And can you imagine how her
husband and her family members felt if
they too heard that rumor! I know that
this rumor was not started maliciously,
but developed as a result of someone not
listening carefully. Someone heard what
he/she wanted to hear and passed on the
information to someone else. How sick!
Before we open our big mouths
to start or spread another rumor, let’s
think before we speak or act. Who are
we hurting in the long run? We may be
damaging someone’s character or ego
for life. We also should stop and think
about how we are being perceived by
others when we participate in this mali
cious and harmful behavior. I, myself,
have no desire whatsoever to be known
in the community as “a gossiper” ! Before
we “ spread the work” about someone
else, let’s get our facts straight, decide if
this information warrants acknowledged,
and learn to distinguish, between good
and bad rumors. Perhaps it’s best just to
keep our mouths closed. Anyone with
“ zero” intelligence can start a rumor.
Starting rumors takes very little effort.
Let’s focus on the good we find in people
rather than the bad. Over the years I’ve
learned to keep my mouth shut. Have
you?
By ULLYSSES TUCKER, JR.
Webster’s dictionary defines rumors
as ‘ ‘unverified information of uncertain
origin usually spread by word of mouth;
gossip; hearsay. Also to spread or tell
by rumor...”
If I took seriously everything that I
heard about myself or thought that oth
ers might accept it as fact, I would
probably be a resident at Dammasch
Hospital under intense medication to
ease my schizophrenic behavior. Some
people can actually go crazy worrying
about what people think about them or
possibly “ stress out” because of what
others say. Why do people consciously
degrade, spread vicious lies/rumors, and
assassinate others’charachter? Accord
ing to individuals I discussed this matter
with, low self-esteem, petty jealousies,
failed relationships, envy, and hate can
prompt people to act maliciously.
Remember in junior high school,
when they held an assembly to address
how rumors and lies get started? The
principle sat six students (in chairs) on
stage. He then gave one student a short
story to read and asked each student to
read, analyze, and share the story with
the person seated next to them. The
students explained the original” lips to
ear” story to each other, but it was
totally different when the audience fi
nally heard it. The exercise clearly
pointed out how easy it is to change a
story, how people do not listen, pay
attention to details, and more impor
tantly, showed how easy it is to form
opinions about issues or other human
beings. Dr. Darryl Tukufu, President of
the Portland Urban League, delivered a
great speech at the annual dinner two
weeks ago about how communications
falls through the cracks simply because
people do not listen or get the facts
straight. He was great. To get the facts
wrong is one story, but to consciously
get information wrong or degrade other
| | 1
Next Week's
We Are All In
This One
Together
HEALTH CHECK-UPS
FOR WOMEN OFFERED
ERVER
(USPS 959-680)
OREGON'S OLDEST AFRICAN AMERICAN PUBLICATION
Established In 1970
Alfred L. Henderson
Publisher
Joyce Washington
Operations Manager
Gary Ann Garnett
Business Manager
Leon Harris
Editorial Manager
The PORTLAND OBSERVER is
published weekly by
Exie Publishing Company, Inc.
4747 N.E. M.L.K., Jr. Blvd.
Portland, Oregon 97211
P.O. Box 3137
Portland, Oregon 97208
(503) 288-0033 (Office)
FAX#: (503) 288-0015
Deadlines for all submitted materials:
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envelope All created design display ads become the sole property of this newspaper and
oan not be used in other publications or personal usage, without the written consent ol the
oeneral manager unless the client has purchased the composition of such ad 1990
PO RTLA ND O BSERVER. ALL RIG HTS RESERVED, REPRO DUCTION IN WHOLE
O R IN PART W IT H O U T PERM ISSIO N IS PROHIBITED
Subscriptions: $20 00 per year in the Tri-Countyarea. $25.00 all other areas
The Portland Observer - Oregon's Oldest African-American Publication is a member
of The National Newspaper Association - Founded In 1885, and The National Adverbs
mg Representative Amalgamated Publishers, Inc , New York, NY
y
A health check-up for women will
hank you for your spirited re
be given from 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Saturday,
August 11,1990 at Western States Chi
sponse to my last week’s essay,
ropractic College’s Outpatient Clinic, “ Loggers Are Hurting Too!” It is
2900 N.E. 132nd Avenue in Portland.
important for African Americans to realize
The $10 examination fee will cover the that there is considerable economic pain
cost of a pap smear, breast exam, spinal being inflicted across the board in this
examination, and urinary lab test. The country-Black, white, and as the old
check-ups are administered by fourth- saying goes, “ blue, grey or grizzle.”
year interns under the supervision of As we are aware, the last two admini
chiropractic physicians. Appointments strations in Washington have exhibited
are necessary and may be made by call a most flagrant disregard for the basic
ing 255-6771.
welfare of their constituencies, express
ing a contempt not before seen in mod
WOMEN’S CRISIS LINE em times. No sector has been sacro
The Portland Women’s Crisis Line
sanct: infants, children, youth, adults or
is pleased to announce openings for its seniors.
September Direct Service Worker (on
And while the citizenry reeled under
line volunteer) Training. Volunteers are
the pressure of ever-inflated prices, soar
now needed to help staff the crisis line,
ing health costs and the dccaptitation of
no experience is necessary. However,
basic and essential social programs, the
only a limited number of spaces are
friends (campaign contributorys) of these
available for training.
politicians were rewarded with the great
PWCL operates a 24 hour a day crisis est golden ripoff since the Post-Civil
intervention hotline for women and chil War Reconstruction-HALF-A-TRIL-
dren (and their families and friends) who LION DOLLARS IN SAVINGS AND
are victims of domestic violence, rape,
LOAN LOOT, and still climbing. It is
incest and sexual harassmenL
all of us poor slobs, whatever ethnic
The 40 hours of training classes begin group, who are going to pick up the tab.
September 11. Interested women should
call 232-9751 and ask for the Volunteer
Coordinator. Deadline for Acceptance
into the program is Friday, August 24.
PWCL is a non-profit, tax exempt or
ganization, funded in part by the United
Way.
Practicum students are encouraged to
apply. Credit is available for this work.
T
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1
and in a score of different ways. Al
ready, the “ Education President” has
suggested the beer and cocktail drinkers
embrace his latest regressive plan to
reduce the deficit
Another fact has proven startling
and disconcerting to many African
Americans, and that is the revelation
that millions of white Americans suffer
from the very same educational inequi
ties that have been inflicted upon Black
youth. American industry has deplored
their lack of basic skills as well; and, as
in the case with ethnic minorities, has
indicted the educational etablishmcnt
for its gross failures to deliver a quality
product. It is certainly hoped that the
nationwide intervention of the business
community is in time to turn the tide.
There is no way in the world that Amer
ica can fit its “ behind-schedule” stu
dents into that “ Year Two Thousand”
time table but the country could achieve
some startling results with this * ‘thinrd-
party” intervention.
Close to home, the July 24 issue of
the Oregonian informs us that a “ Sur
vey Finds 9,802 Students Quit in ’88-
’89" but in the next breath, the subhead
ing rather shakes us up, “ One official
says it will take THREE MORE YEARS
TO GET AN ACCURATE PICTURE
of how many Oregonians give up on
school.” How fortunate we are that the
business community is mounting a major
intervention in a patently sloppy proc
ess. I can’t begin to imagine--and have
never worked fo r-a successfully “ for
profit ’ ’ enterprise that attempted to meet
its marketing goals using a reporting
system with such obvious and long-known
data retrieval disabilities. The article
quotes a number of such failures: “ That
produced unreliable data and didn’t take
into account the students who left one
district and enrolled in school in an-
other-Projecting it out [a one-year time
frame] over four years can’t be done
because until now, everybody measured
dropouts with a DIFFERENT YARD
STICK.”
Last week’s article as stated em
phasized the all-encompassing nature of
the increasing economic travails which
besiege us. Very belatedly the powers-
that-be have revealed many new finan
cial shocks to the state’s infrastructure-
long-term and disastrous consequences
that were blithely ignored by the Spot
ted Owl enthusiasts. Not only will the
direct timber severance allocations to
educations districts be lost, but the criti
cal local tax bases will be severely eroded
in a number of Oregon counties-w here
it was already as difficult as heck to get
a school levy passed. Still, we are spo
ken to as though we were fools,
“ TOURISM WILL MAKE IT UP!”
And it is not only the “ downstate”
white folks who are going to suffer, but
theinevitable“ dominoeffect” will cas
cade right up to Portland, vacating down
town offices and reducing the number of
chic lunches and the burden of hundreds
of smart attache cases. The effect will
be noticeable in Northeast also. Critical
social programs will experience some
cutbacks. Yes, “ We Arc All In This To
gether.”
Support our Advertisers—
SAY YOU SAW IT IN
THE PORTfAND OBSERVER
** A • A * <
«
|
who works for the Bureau of Labor and
Industries (Civil Rights), had the nerve
to do what others failed todo. Shecalled
me and asked me about the promo, point
blank. She even went on to say how
people were having a field day blasting
me, my character, and white wife. I
laughed on the telephone. First of all, I
am not married to anyone, let alone a
white woman. If I were married to a
white woman, I would care less about
what others thought because it would be
my personal choice. It would be no
one’s business but my own. Another
good friend told me about a person, who
sarcastically asked her had she “ heard
the latest about your friend Tucker?”
She replied no. He then went on the tell
her about my covert interracial mar
riage. Where will it all end? People
must have a great deal of idle time on
their hands if that’s all they have to,
spread rumors that is. Strangely, none
of the “ friends” of the white woman
called her about being “ married” to a
Black man covertly.
My lady friend, who thinks that it is
funny, suggests that if I was a more
public person people would not have to
fill in the cracks about me. Actually, I
enjoy my private and personal space
very much. The more people you have
in your life, the more complicated your
life can get and who needs additional
drama? I would much rather have a
couple of good friends in my life than
several who do not have my best interest
at heart. Besides, Portland is too small.
You have to be most careful about the
type of people you bring into your life.
If you don’t have anything nice to say
about people, don’t say anything at all.
My grandmother Tucker once told me
that if you wanted to know something
about someone or something, then go to
the source or the horse’s mouth. From
idle minds, comes idle chatter. Did you
hear about the time...
By Professor McKinley Burt
Her's And His' Opinion
Understanding And
Accepting Death
P O R TL
people is a decadent act.
Recently, I was asked to participate
in a promotional spot on “ Interracial
Marriages” for AM Northwest without
giving the social repercussions any real
thoughL It is not uncommon for KATU
employees to help shows like Sunday
NW, AM NW, and Town Hall by serv
ing as talent for various spots/commer-
cials. Janice Bangs, a white female and
the producer of this particular show on
“ Interracial Marriages” , was the woman
opposite me in this promotional spot.
We sat on the couch, in the KATU
studios I might add, and looked through
a scrapbook like many couples do. We
smiled at the pictures, made eyes at each
other, and laughed as the voice of Dick
Novak belted “ Interracial Marriages,
tomorrow at nine on AM Northwest.”
Basically, the promo lasted about fif
teen seconds, but what followed has yet
to end and the rumors/stories get greater
by the day.
First of all, I received about 13 tele
phone calls from viewers/friends (or those
I considered friends) criticizing me for
being covertly married to a white woman,
questioning me about why I never brought
her out in public and one person even
called me a “ sellout” because I write so
much “ pro Black” material for this
publication. I even received calls from
females, who were more interested in
me than I was them (when I first arrived
back to Portland), cursing me for ‘ ‘being
married” all the time and even a few
more expressed their disappointment
about not being invited to the wedding.
One “ friend” even suggested that my
credibility in the Black community would
greatly drop now that I’m married to a
white woman. In every one of the cases
metioned above, no one ever asked me if
I was married or not. They either as
sumed it or believed what the television
projected. Is television that strong or are
people that dumb? Or both?
One person (God Bless her soul),
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