8
THE MORNING OREGONIAN. WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 9, 1907.
: i
SUBSCRIPTION K.iTKS.
INVARIABLY IN ADVANCE.
(Py Mali.)
tnlly. Sunday Included, one year $8.00
Illy. Sunday in'ludi-d, six months.... 4.25
pally, Sunday Included, three months.. Z.25
IJally, Sunday Included, one month 73
Ially, without Sunday, one year 6.00
Jally, without Sunday, six months.... .'-
Islly. without Sunday, three months.. 1.75
Jatly, without Sunday, one month 60
Funday, one year 8.50
Weekly, one year f issued Thursday).. 1.50
Eunday and Weekly, one year 8.60
BY CARRIER.
Xally. Sunday included, one year....... 9.00
Ially. Sunday Included, one month 73
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reka News Co.
PORTLAND. WEDNESDAY, OCT. 9, 1907.
A SPECIOUS TRICK.
Wise and wealthy as it Is, Collier's
Weekly occasionally says some sur
prisingly silly things. Here- is one of
them: "It is a curious example of
life's little ironies that the thing which
most particularly subjects the Stand
ard Oil Company to public odium is
the direct outcome of its failure to
practice a vice which the public espe
cially condemns. It has not watered
Its stock and therefore -its profits
stand out in all their naked enormity."
This sounds plausible enough, but
nothing could miss the point further.
Nobody censures the prollts of the
Standard Oil merely because they are
big. What appals the world is to see
them at th same time so big and so
wicked. Objection is made, not to the
profits themselves, but to the way they
wre earned. We have been taught
from babyhood that while the wicked
may flourish for a time like the green
bay tree, nevertheless their prosperity
ts but as grass that withereth or as
the flower that fades. The mammoth
accumulations of Standard Oil. gath
ered by nefarious arts and in defiance
, 1 . . 1. .. . -v.n ... 1 1 .. ... BnA
UX JUBllU, IUUI IL ui. tiic ..mini fc " ..u
make a Jest of religion. That is why
men censure them. Their mere big
ness does not so much matter.
-And yet they are very much too
big. Collier's adds with fatuous com
placency: "It is hardly surprising that
there Is talk now of an Increase of
Ptandard Oil's i--minal capital to
1400.000,000 or $500,000,000 and a re
duction of dividends to proportions in
offensive to public opinion." It is un
necessary to say that the dividends of
Standard Oil can never be made In
offensive to public opinion except by a
radical change in the manner of earn
ing them. So long as they are ob
tained by cut-throat competition, spy
ing upon the affairs of rivals, rebates
and discriminations, they never can be
made small enough to lose their fetid
odor. But the real proposal is not by
any means to make the profits of
Standard Oil smaller; it is rather to
play a little game of deception upon
the public. Not a penny less is to be
extorted from the purchasers of kero
sene, but the percentage of gain is to
be computed upon a larger nominal
base. That is the whole of the game.
In what way will the consumer be
benefited by this device? Nobody pre
tends that he will be benefited at all.
The purpose is not to benefit but to
fool him with the delusion that he is
not so outrageously robbed as he was
before.
The quarrel of the American people
with Standard Oil stands somewhat in
this wise: The Almighty gave us a
deposit of petroleum. Mr. Rockefel
ler and his accomplices have forced
us to pay J900.000.000 in the last
twenty years for permission to use the
gift. This tribute is exclusive of the
tost of mining and transporting the
oil. It Is clear profit; and it seems
to be a very moderate statement to
say that it ts too much. If it had
been earned by methods which pass
for honest it would still be too much;
but the notorious truth Is that the
profit of Standard Oil has been won
by tricks which no honest man can
. approve. Except a few preachers and
college presidents they find no apolo-
' gists. Is It astonishing that the peo
ple of this country are indignant be
cause of this colossal swindle? And
is. it likely that their Indignation will
be lulled by so simple a trick as water
ing the stock of the monopoly? What
difference does it mane to poor jacK
whether he has to sweat out 50 per
cent on one share of stock or 5 per
cent on ten shares? There was a time
when he could be bedeviled by this ob
vious slight, but that time has passed.
Collier's may rest moderately well as
sured that public opinion will not be
placated by the irrigation of Mr.
Rockefeller's stock.
What would bo the real effect of the
trick should It ever be played?
Would not the ultimate tendency be to
force the price of oil upward until the
dividends upon the watered stock
were as large as upon the original
shares? What Is to hinder? The
monopoly of Mr. Rockefeller and his.
accomplices is complete. Absolutely
nothing exists 'to keep down the price
of petroleum except the fear of con
tracting its use. One might predict
with unqualified confidence that in a
few years the public would find itself
paying ' the" same rate of dividends
upon the new stock, with all its water,
that it now pays upon the old: and the
price of petroleum would be raised to
a figure which would yield the neces
sary profits. Knowing what we do of
Standard Oil, it seems highly proba
ble that this is what the octopus has
In mind. The trick can be worked
Just now under the convenient sem
blance of deference to public opinion.
Of one thing we may be very certain,
that whatever apparent concessions
the public gets from the petroleum
pirates must be heavily paid for in the
long run. To be sure, an authority
so eminent as the New York Evening
Post holds that stock watering does
not lead to high prices. It even utters
the specious syllogism that if watering
stock makes prices high, then con
tracting stock ought to make them
low, which we know is not the case.
The obvious fact which makes all such
reasoning fallacious Is that a monop
oly can fix its prices at any figure it
pleases and compel the public to pay
them. It' can extort exorbitant divi
dends on a small number of shares,
and it can extort dividends still more
exorbitant on a large number. It can
do whatever it likes with prices and
the public has no effective remedy so
long as it permits the monopoly to
exist.
ABUSIVE ENGLISH WRITERS.
To disparage and defarne the people
of the United States is an old habit
with a class of English writers. The
criticism of such writers as Haliburton
and Dickens, touched1 with humor,
though grotesque in caricature, makes
pleasant reading; but the studied
abuse and vilification of the troop of
inferior critics produce a different im
pression. We ought not to mind it,
indeed; and we do mind it but little.
Yet at one time or another we take
some note of it.
Yesterday The Oregonian had an
extract from an article published by
the London Academy, in which the
writer said he had "undertaken to de
pict the horrible body of death, decay
and wickedness which is called the
United States of America." This, in
deed, is the penny dreadful style. If
the writer wished to say something
really strong and. impressive, where
could he get the words? He has al
ready exhausted his vocabulary.
The better class of English writers,
the class of truer perceptions and
wider sympathies, do not fall into this
style. It is a Btyle that befits a certain
provincial egotism of the English
islander, but does not belong to the
man of the British Empire. It is
merely characteristic of a class which
regards foreign countries and peoples
exclusively through the narrow me
dium of self-importance and self-satisfaction.
Our variation from the Old
World needs no apology. It is In the
line of advancement towards greater
freedom of action and better social
and industrial conditions for the
masses of the people.
These English critics are still as
narrow as their predecessors of the
same class were, a century ago. To
them anything unlike their England
(not the great England, but the Eng
land of their own incurable provin
cialism ) is backwoods vulgarity. It
has been fortunate for America that
she has despised this arrogance. Had
we cared for it or winced under it,
it might have had a tendency to keep
us in mental vassalage and to pre
vent the growth of a proper national
pride. English critics of this class
have another of the worst faults of
their own provincialism. As De
Tocqueville, one of the most appreci
ative of the students of America, long
ago observed: "In the eyes of these
Englishmen a man or government that
seems to them useful to England has
every kind of merit; one that does not,
every possible fault. With them the
criterion of what is honorable or just
is to be found in the degree 'of favor
or opposition to what they suppose to
be English interests or feelings.
There is something of this every
where; but there is so much of it in
England that the foreigner is aston
ished." Here, undoubtedly, is. the
source of much of the invective still
directed by a class of English visitors
and travelers against the United
States.
A PREVALENT DISEASE.
The Oregonian has nothing to say
in mitigation of the offense of the
High School boys who pilfered goods
from a store In Forest Grove. What
they did was theft pure and simple,
and they may think themselves lucky
to get off so easily. We have no soft
names to apply to their deed and no
mushy palliations to offer for it. Their
conduct should be investigated by the
authorities of the High School afrid the
question should be seriously consid
ered whether young men with so little
moral principle are suitable associates
for their schoolmates.
It ought to be said, however, that
these misguided youths were simply
following an example which high soci
ety has set for them. The practice
of "lifting" or "swiping" the property
of others has long been fashionable
among the students of our more aris
tocratic colleges, particularly those be
longing to. the wealthy circles. Of late
It has extended to their fathers and
mothers. It is now quite au fait. In
fact almost de rlguer, for high-born
dames to steal the spoons at dinner
parties. When they are Invited on board
ships of the Federal Navy they make it
a rule to pick up and pocket any un
considered trifles which they see lying
around. It is said that real silver Is
now seldom seen at a lunch party on
these vessels. If it were used it
would almost certainly be stolen by
aristocratic guests.
It seems that our better classes
have carried into social life the prac
tices by which most of them gained
their wealth. School and college stu
dents are quick to imitate the habits
of high society, too quick in many
cases for their own good. Just as
boys will readily imitate the bad habits
of men on the streets, so school cliques
and sets catch up the objectionable
practices which prevail among their
elders. The High School boys who
looted the store at Forest Grove
should be severely punished for what
they did; but it is useless to think of
reforming them until some of their
parents and friends have experienced
a change of heart. Their misconduct
was one of the symptoms or a disease
which is very general in this country
and which seems to be without any
present remedy. . It Is found prevalent
among the Mayors and police officers
of our cities, among labor unions and
capitalists, among the railroads, and
all other classes of corporations, and
it is not unknown even in the sacred
precincts of the courts of justice. Its
name is contempt for law.
MR. HARKI.MAN'S ACHIEVEMENTS.
The San Francisco Call pays a glow
ing tribute to Mr. Harriman, whom it
terms "a great executive endowed with
the priceless gift of imagination." It
gives his record of wonderful achieve
ments as follows:
The construction of the great cut-off
through the heart of the Great Salt Lake,
practically removing the mountain barrier
to commerce between the East and the
West.
The capture of the Colorado River and the
saving of the Imperial Valle;-.
Tire construction of the mammoth liners
Mongolia. Manchuria, Siberia and Korea.
The creation of a waterway route between
San Francisco and the mainland by the
construction of the Bay Shore cut-off and
its fire tunnels and the bridging of San
Francisco Bay at Dumbarton point.
The record is one of which the Wall
street magnate has reason to be proud,
but it may be difficult for the people
of Oregon to become enthusiastic over
it. Every "achievement" mentioned
was for the exclusive purpose of in
creasing facilities for paying tribute to
San Francisco. In Oregon, where the
Harriman lines have shown greater
earnings per mile than were ever re
ceived from the California lines, we
can hardly regard removal of that
"mountain barrier to commerce" with
out permitting our minds to dwell
on that unremoved "barrier to com
merce" with Central Oregon. Mention
of the mammoth liners brings to our
minds the irregular, inadequate fleet
of "tramps" which Is expected to do
for Portland what the magnificent
Mongolia, Manchuria, Siberia and
Corea do for San Francisco. Mr. Har
riman has saved the Imperial "Valley
In California, but he has shamefully
neglected the Wallowa Valley, the Ne
halem Valley and several million acres
of other valleys in Oregon.
Along with this gladsome news of
what Mr. Harriman has done In Cali
fornia comes a statement from Seat
tle giving the cost of his new line from
Portland to Puget Sound. This state
ment gives the cost of the land secured
in Seattle for terminal purposes at
$12,000,000, while $5,000,000 was paid
for the terminal grounds at Tacoma
and another $5,000,000 for right of
way. This road will not serve a sin
gle mile of territory that is not served
by a road already built, and one-half
the money already thrown away on
these terminal grounds and right of
way would have built up a fine road
into Central Oregon and opened up for
settlement an empire.
While all of these marvelous
"achievements" were being placed on
record north and south of Oregon,
work in this state has been confined
to occasional sorties into new territory
for the purpose of heading oft some
one who might intend to build a few
miles of road. However, we are not
without hope. Some Wall-street men
have lived to be 100 years old, and Mr.
Harriman has not yet turned 60.
WEALTH OF THE FARM.
The gold production of the entire
world dwindles into insignificance In
comparison with the value of the
products of the American farm. This
is true in ordinary years of low prices,
and in a year of high prices such as
are now in evidence, the contrast is all
the more striking. The American
grain markets are soaring to heights
which have not been reached for
years, and the aggregate value of the
wheat and corn crops of the United
States at the present range of prices is
in excess of $2,000,000,000. The crops
in volume are somewhat below the
records of those of previous years, but
they are of sufficient size to tax the
capacity of the railroads to move
them, and, as they place in the hands
of farmers such vast sums of money,
the effect on all lines of business is
certain to be highly beneficial.
Corn and wheat are not alone
among wealth producers which are
pouring gold into the pockets of the
farmers, for with few exceptions
everything produced on the farm is
selling at high prices. In years of low
prices and small crops, when hard
times are felt on the farm, the influ-
aca of this great factor in American
ffmmercial life is to a degree lost
sight of, but at all times it is an over
whelming influence in the prosperity
or the adversity of the Nation. The
current issue of The .World Today
magazine has an article on "The Rail
road and the Small Town" which pre
sents some very interesting figures
showing not only the mutual interests
of the railroad and the farmer, but in
cidentally demonstrating the tremen
dous financial power annually gener
ated on the farm.
The writer takes for his text the
town of Essex, la., with a population
of 710 inhabitants, and quite truth
fully remarks that but few people out
side of the atlas makers and the cen
sus taker have heard of this town.
which is "one of the 10,000 villages of
the United States which have made
Wall street possible." But out of thjs
one of the ten thousand there were
shipped, in the year ending June 30,
151 cars of cattle, 227 cars of hogs,
99 cars of corn, 9 cars of horses, 3
cars of eggs and 1 car of oats, for
which the shippers received, clear of
freight charges. $413,391. A sum
mary is also given of the shipments
from fifty-nine other stations, some'
larger and some smaller, but all lo
cated in the Middle West farming belt
at a distance of 100 to 900 miles from
Chicago.
From these fifty-nine small towns
there were shipped by rail in the year
mentioned 21,147 carloads of farm
products of a net value to the shipper
of $18,385,020, and for which the rail
roads were paid approximately
$1,200,000. The amount of money
placed In circulation in the vicinity of
these 10,000 villages and towns,
which support our American railroads,
is In the aggregate a sum sufficient to
make even WaW street sit up and take
notice, and in the annual process of
converting this vast amount of raw
material into cash or negotiable paper
the railroads naturally play a most
important part. Their prosperity and
fortunes are inseparably linked with
those of the country they serve.
Every additional car of farm produce
shipped from any of these 10,000 sta
tions increases the circulating medium
in the vicinity from which it was
shipped, and it also increases the
profits of the road which hauls it to
market.
The showing made by the Middle
Western towns is small In comparison
with that which could be. made by
many Pacific Northwestern stations,
and, as soon as railroads are built
through the long-heglected regions in
Oregon and Washington where the in
habitants are now denied transporta
tion facilities, the production of agri
cultural wealth and the business of
the railroads will show greater in
creases than can possibly be scored
anywhere east of the Rocky Moun
tains. Mr. Raisull, of the suburbs of Tan
gier, offers a good illustration of what
thrift and a strict attention to business
may accomplish. Prior to the capture
of Perdicaris, an occasional hold-up
or raid on the camel corral of his
neighbors was about the height of his
ambition, but the liberal reward paid
for "Perdy changed the outlaw's
views of life. He is now holding
MacLain, the Englishman, for a ran
som pf $150,000, with a lot of conces
sions thrown in, and late advices are
to the effect that his demands will be
met. Such substantial rewards can
not fall to encourage Raisuli to widen
his sphere of activity, and it is not im
probable that his next pick-up will be
some royal nincompoop who may de
ceive his government as to his true
value and enable Raisuli to collect as
large a dividend as his fellow-craftsmen
in Wall street collect every
month. Still, "Ras" may carry his
Jokes too far and run afoul of a live
wire.
The Government Is again threaten
ing discrimination against Portland in
movement of troops to the Philippines.
Nearly all of the men to be trans
ferred are to be sent by rail from Van
couver to San Francisco, from which
point the Government will dispatch
the transport. Such unfair work is on
a par with what has been in evidence
in the past. The men who are respon
sible for this discrimination are mere
ly employes of the Government. If
any employe of a business corporation
were guilty of such expensive and un
businesslike work, he would be
promptly -discharged, and in all likeli
hood prosecuted. It has never been
entirely clear to those who pay the
bills why Government employes should
be thus permitted to squander money,
and in these attempts to discriminate
against one port" in favor of another.
Perhaps if we could make the punish
ment fit the crime the injustice would
cease.
The Oregonian is in receipt of re
quests from principals, superintend
ents and teachers of various schools
In the State of Washington for infor
mation on the initiative and referen
dum. It appears to be the impression
among them that The Oregonian is
ready offhand to furnish to individuals
material for discussion of all phases of
this or any other question. That is a
mistake. The Oregonian is simply in
the business of printing a newspaper,
and, outside of its columns, It cannot
promote any propaganda on any sub
ject. Therefore it cannot help out the
many applicants for Information ex
cept by reference to Its columns, which
have in the past several years had
much to say about the initiative and
referendum. If this is not satisfac
tory, the inquirers might go to orig
inal sources for their information, as
The Oregonian has done.
For what purpose is President Rip
ley, of the Santa Fe, so active in his
croaking? His newest complaint is
that so far this year net earnings of
railroads are only 6 per cent on the
entire capitalization. Eliminate the
"water" and the percentage of earn
ings is quadrupled. Like Harriman.
Mr. Ripley will learn that he can't
scare the country. Announcement
that the Great Northern has Just de
clared an extra dividend of 1 per
cent will go a long way toward neu
tralizing carping criticism of the Gov
ernment's railroad policy.
A seedless, coreless pear is the lat
est horticultural development or dis
covery at Hood River. The variety
was not originated it simply grew.
It is called the "Mason pear," in honor
of A. I. Mason, whose wife discovered
its coreless, seedless state. "Topsy"
would be a better name, since, as
above noted, the pear "just growed."
This would also decide the equities in
the case, there being now a question
as to, whether it should be called the
"Mason" or the "Mrs. Mason" pear.
But we hope the question will never
lead to a Mason jar.
Anthony Noltner, pioneer, newspa
per publisher and Democratic politi
cian of past years, died at his home
in this city yesterday morning, aged
68 years. Mr. Noltner had lived in
Portland almost continuously for
fifty years, and leaves behind him a
record of kindness, neighborliness and,
during his active years, of persistent
endeavor. Failing health caused him
to relinquish business. Death came
practically without warning, and its
announcement was a shock to his
friends and acquaintances of other
days. - t
Ford-street bridge has acquired a
grewsome reputation, three persons
having dashed themselves or been
dashed to death from its dizzy height
in recent months. Suicide takes on
added horrors when such desperate
means are taken to compass it. The
Insanity of desperation or the despera
tion of insanity can alone account for
a .leap so frightful, even in sugges
tion, and so horrible in execution.
Arrest of a houseful of Italians for
violating the air ordinance revives a
municipal statute enacted a genera
tion ago to compel Chinese to observe
at least one law of health. If In Port
land it is a misdemeanor to sleep in an
apartment having less than 550 cubic
feet of air, what crime must be
charged against the Pullman Car
Company?
If every person who accidentally
gave medicine out of the wrong bot
tle were paying the penalty inflicted
on Private Kane, the population of
penitentiaries would be largely In
creased. Every baseball enthusiast in the
country will sympathize with Roose
velt in his enforced exile, miles from
bulletin boards displaying the score of
the championship games.
Evidently the trusts have started in
to head off any boom that may be
started for Hughes. Daniel Guggen
helm publicly approves the New York
Governor's" policies.
A nauseated nation will wish that
the Hartjes do their quarreling out
side of a public courtroom.
LIVING SOW AND FIVE YEARS AGO I
Cost of AH Feed-Stuffs Has Increased,
All Along; the Line.
BY JOHN M. LOWXSDALE
A comparison of the retail food prices
of today and five years ago show many
Interesting changes. The cost of living
has increased all over the country, but
no greater in Portland than elsewhere.
Except in a few articles of local produc
tion, such as flour, butter and apples,
the increase in prices of food has not
been so great as many have supposed.
The advance might not be regarded as a
hardship If rent, fuel and other neces
saries were not excessively high. It is
the combination of all these that make
the average wage earner feel the pres
sure of the prosperous times.
The direct cause of the present - hla
prices can be found In the enlarged de
mand for all agricultural and manufac
tured food products. Back of the de
mand is the ability and willingness of
the consuming public to pay the prices
asked. In many ways the American peo
ple are more wasteful than they were
five years ago, and nowhere, probably,
is the same economy practiced as was
the case then. This has made a dram
on the establishments that manufacture
food products, and therefore caused
higher prices.
With goods of local production, such as
mlllstuffs, prices are regulated by the
value of the raw material and this Is
governed by yearly crop conditions of
world wide extent. Butter, though strict
ly a home product, is sold in accordance
with price changes in the East, owing to
the interchange of commerce in this ar
ticle. Canned goods and similar lines
are also dependent on crop conditions
over a wide range of territory.
While production in all lines in the past
five years has Increased, It has not kept
pace with the growth of population in
all sections. Even if this were the case,
prices would in all probability still be
higher than they were five years ago,
for the simple reason that the buying
or spending capacity of the people has
also grown.
Purchasers of groceries may have no
ticed that the prices of the higher grades
of goods have not materially changed in
years. The greatest increase has been
in the low grades which, as a rule, are
dear at any price. In some lines the
pure food law has had the effect of in
creasing cost, but this has not worked
any hardship on the consumer.
The following list shows the retail
prices In Portland of staple articles of
food now and five years ago:
190T. 1002.
Butter, lb W
Cheese, lb
Begs, do ??
Potatoes, saclc - 1-w
Onions, sacls J-iO .J
ATnl.A box - 1-OQ -'O
Chickens, lb -0 -J":
Ducks, lb....: -. 20 -16
Geese, lb '.I.
Turkey!., lb l .M
Beef, lb - 'i"
Mutton, lb sUr'J iZ:
Veal, lb T915 S12'4
Pork lb bfall 4(&1
Flour, sack 1.40- -w'
Sugar, sack - 5-1 4.35
Fvrup, 4-gal 2.25 1.85
Maple Syrup, gal 1.60 1-5
Honey, gal l-2o ll
Jellies. 10 oz SO
Mushrooms, can .i" -
Oysters, can -o .20
Lobsters, can
French sardines, can ia -i"
Columbia. River Salmon, can 25 .20
Codfish, lb , 1214 .1014
Mackerel, each 35 .25
Crackers, lb 10 .
Rice, lb ; ok
Sara, lb 08 .0o
Tapioca, lb US -"5 ,
Split Peas, lb 0814 .
Cracked Wheat, sack 4tl .25
Rolled Oats, sack 50 .45
Graham f lour, eack . ..w
Cocoa, can 30 .25
Package Coffee. Ib zo .10
Family Coffee, lb 35 ..15
Tea. lb 25aro 25650
kard, can 75 .75
Ham, lb - iii4 -'"ii
Bacon, lb 22 .20
Condensed Milk, can 10 .0814
Baking Powder, can 4o .4o
Tomatoes, can 15 .15
PeaSL can Jo .lo
Corn, can .15 .15
Apricots, can 30 .20
Peaches, can.................... . 3u .25
Olive Oil. gal 3.50 3.09
NEEDLESS OPENING OF BRIDGES
Why Are Vessels Moved Just When the
Public Travels Moat?
PORTLAND, Or., Oct. 8. (To the
Editor.) Is there no way of compell
ing selfish, careless ship's officers and
river men to recognize the rights of
others when it comes to keeping the
bridges open during the rush hours?
At noon today Tuesday a large
number of people, to say nothing of a
few dozen streetcars and a score or so
of teams, were detained on the 'Steel
bridge for over 20 minutes while the
steamer "City of Panama" was
"warped" from the "Alaska dock to
her regular berth at the Alnsworth
dock. That is, bridge traffic was sus
pended while the ship was moved the
entire distance by heaving in a line,
extended to the latter dock, with her
steam winch. The bridge was opened
at 10 minutes before 12, before the
steamer was even started and it was
20 or 25 minutes later before it was
closed again to permit traffic to move
on Its way. Just why the noon hour
should have been chosen for this
maneuver is not evident unless it was
desired to have the vessel moved while
the longshoremen were at lunch, thus
saving their time, but even so the
rights of scores of people hurrying
home to their mid-day meals should
be recognized and respected. No one
wishes to have the bridges entirely
closed at any time, but the opening of
them at the morning, noon and evening
rush hours should be confined to the
accommodation of steamers plying on
their regular runs, while towing, shift
ing berths and other harbor work
should be compelled to await a more
seasonable time.
This matter should be given attention
by those in authority, as the river men
are again growing very careless and
scarcely a day passes but traffic on the
bridge is needlessly delayed.
DENNIS C. PILLSBTJRY.
"Old Man" Bennett's Jfew Stunt.
Irrlgon Irrigator.
P. J. Sullivan, representing a type
writer company of Portland, was in
town Saturday last and succeeded In -selling
one 'of his machines to the editor of
this paper. We already had one at The
Dalles and another In The Irrigator of
fice, but wanted one for our room to
work out a great scheme which we have
on foot, orvj-ather on toes. We will learn
to operate this with our toes and then
place it at the foot of our bed so we
can work it during the night. In this
way we hope to record our dreams and
hand out "to the anxious 'public tome lit
erary effusions entirely out of the or
dinary. ;
Preacher's Dream Traces Defaulter.
Pittsburg Dispatch.
Rev. Abel S. Dlckerson, a colored
preacher of Pittsburg, Pa., dreamed that
he saw the treasurer of his congrega
tion making merry with the church funds,
and a detective later found the delin
quent in Philadelphia, where the dream
had located him.
He Is 6 Years, and Digs Potatoes.
Boston Post.
Michael McNemey. lately celebrated at
Becket, Mass.. his 96th birthday by then
digging two acres of potatoes. Annually
for 75 years he has mowed six tons of
hay with an old-fasbioned scythe. He
thinks he will live to be 100.
HAD "FORTY TO CHOOSE FROM.
Missouri Solon Wants a Wife and Se
lects a Widow.
St. Louis Post-Dispatch.
Charles Rohne, a Mr. Newlywed at
66, was so enthusiastic over his bride,
his selection from a list of more than
40 applicants for his hand, that he de
clared he was glad he had waived his
age requirement in her case. He orig
inally sought a wife not less than 50
years old. The new Mrs. Rohne Is
a scant 45. She was a Mrs. Lizzie
Schettler.
"Mrs. Schettler my wife, I mean
was the one I had my eyes on from
the start" Rohne confided to a Post
Dispatch reporter. "The others never
really had a chance after I saw her
and talked with her. The only objec
tion I ever had to her was that she
was too young, but I was soon cln
vlnced that she was as experienced and
sensible as an older woman would be.
if I had known her In the first place,
I wouldn't have needed to write to
the Judge," said Rohne. Ke evaded
the question whether Mrs. Schettler
had applied by letter or in person.
The bride showed equal diffidence
when this question was asked of her.
Though he employed the town crier
in his search for a helpmate, Rohne
shrank from publicity when the search
was over and the ceremony drew near.
He consulted with his benefactor, Jus
tice Werremeyer, as to the time whei
he would be most lively to escape the
gaze of the curious at Clayton.
He was advised to come after 8"
P. M. Impatience overcame caution,
and it was only 6:40 on a recent eve
ning when Rohne, Mrs. Schettler and
a woman friend of the bride steppej
oft the car at the Clayton publK:
square.
The former legislator glistened with
a clean shave and in a new black
suit- He wore a cocked hat of a
pattern which long wear has provt?d
to be the. best adapted to his rubi
cund face.
Mrs. Schettler, who is of ruddy
countenance and youthful appearance,
wore a plain white shirtwaist and a
black skirt, with a black hat.
Justice Werremeyer, who Is known
to fame through his poetical street
car advertisements, has also a poet
ical ceremony which he uses In mar
rying those who are sentimentally in
clined. Rohne made it plain that his
chief concern was to have the matter
over with, and the ceremony in his
case was made the shortest in the Jus
tice's repertoire.
MAKING OP HEALTHY STl'DEXTS
Boys and Girls In Colleges Growing in
Height, Weight and Strength.
Medical and Surgical Journal.
In 1899 Dr. Paul C. Phillips, now in
charge of the department of h"glene and
physica) education at Amherst College,
cal which showed beyond a peradven
ture that the boy who goes to college
today is taller and heavier and the
girl taller, heavier and of greater chest
girth than ihe boy and girl of the same
age from forty to. fifty years ago.
Mr. J. H. Vines had in 1899 found
the same facts to be true in England,
the boys in Marlborough and Rugby
schools, ranging from twelve to eigh
teen years of age, being both taller
and heavier at the same age than their
fathers had been a quarter of a cen
tury before.
Of the girls examined at Smith Col
lege In 1900-03, those at seventeen
years showed a superiority of a half
Inch In height, three pounds in weight
and two-thirds of an inch in chest
girth over those at the same age
1883-88. At eighteen years the superi
ority amounted to three-fifths of an
inch in height, nearly three pounds In
weight and half an inch in chest girth.
These were in general corroborated by
figures from W'ellesley, Oberlin, Chi
cago and Mount Holyoke colleges.
The Amherst College figures are
from thousands of students and very
heights and weights of students 17
to 20 years of age to be as follows
In three different periods:
Weight of Amherst College Students
1800-84. 18S4-U4. 1B00-03.
Age. Inches. Inches. Inches.
17 years . 66 8 68 0 68.2
18 year 67.0 68.1 68.4
19 years B7.1 68.2 67.7
20 years 67.5 68.3 68.3
Weight of Amserst College Students
Pounds. Pounds. Pounds.
17 years 128.7 ino.8 12it,9
18 years -....131.1 133.6 134.5
19 years 131.1 136.4 135.6
20 years 135.0 138.0 183.2
The statistics for 1900-03 would prob
ably show the superiority more clearly
were they as numerous as those for
the preceding periods. The measure
ment of freshmen for the years since
1903 show the class average even
higher In height, weight and strength
than they were in the years 1900-03,
although the average age Is somewhat
less.
Revere'n Ride an a Haslnc; Stunt.
Cambridge (Mass.) Dispatch North
American.
One of.the queerest bits of hazing here
was the representation of Paul Revere's
ride, famed in history.
The victim was persuaded to mount a
white mule at midnight, and, attired in a
continental uniform, he dug a pair of
huge Spanish spurs into the flanks of his'
steed, which dashed away over the same
road taken by the Revolutionary hero.
At each village hamlet and squire the
student shouted at the top of his voice:
"The British are coming! The British
are coming! To arms!"
Persons awakened from their sleep
gazed out of their windows in surprise
as the phantom steed and rider faded
into the night. Many thought a madman
was loose and notified the police.
At several houses the modern Revere
hammered on the doorB until the owners
appeared, and to each he Imparted the
startling information that the redcoats
were invading the colony.
The famous ride ended when a motor
cycle cop caught up with the mule and
arrested the whole outfit for disturbing
the peace.
Grow Peanuts la Linn.
Albany Herald.
M. Hyde, of this city, has demonstrated
the fact that peanuts can be raised in
Oregon. Last June he got some raw pea
nuts and planted a long row at his place
in the first ward. They are growing In
fine shape and will be ripe in another
month. The peanuts are already well
developed with some good kernels. A
former Southern man who is familiar
with peanut culture says they are as
good as those in the South. There Is
big money in peanut raising. Perhaps
this may become a peanut country. It
is worth the trial, with such a demon
stration as this.
A cluster of them may be seen at the
Oregon Market by any one Interested.
Prosit!
Chicago News.
Here's a health to you, old fellow!
Drlnk her down!
Till you're confortably mellow.
Drink her down!
Here's a tongue that's parched and baking
Ana a nana mat-s not ana snaKing
And a morning head that's aching!
Drink her down!
Here's success to you. old .ehapplel"
Drink her down!
Just get gloriously happy!
Drink her down!
Here's your precious time all trifled
And your energies quite stifled
And your brains of wisdom rifled!
Drink her down!
Well, here's happiness, old crony!
Drink her downl
Here's your best friends' glances stony!
Drink her down!
When you get to seeing double
How your happiness will bubble!
Well, here's poverty and trouble!
Xrlnlt her down.
NATIONAL 0lARD
URSUANT to a resolution adopted
by the Military Board for the pur
pose of complying with the require
ments of the amended army regulations,
the minimum strength of Infantry com
panies will be S men hereafter. This
will make It necessary for each com
pany to seek at least eight new recruits
in order to pass muster at annual in
spections. An Increase, too, Is provided in the
artillery so that hereafter the local bat
tery will have not less than 102 privates,
besides the regular complement of offi
cers and non-commissioned officers. The
hospital corps is likewise affected so
that in the future each ambulance com
pany must consist of two first-class ser
geants, seven sergeants,' 20 first-class pri
vates and 14 privates. .An order directing
these changes has been Issued by General
Finzer and will be posted at the Armory
at once.
It will entail a lot of hustling on the
part of the various company commanders
for many of the commands are at this
time upder the minimum strength. In all,
100 men will be needed and while It Is
felt some difficulty Is going to be ex
perienced In getting that number of de
sirable men. it Is to bo hoped that the
ranks will be filled up promptly.
Considering the advantages offered toy
military training in the National Guard
it Is surprising, in fact, that every com
pany is not filled to the maximum rather
than minimum strength. There should
be a waiting list. Military training Is of
the utmost importance to every young
man. It is not only regarded as a duty
to know something of the use of arms
but such knowledge offers many advan
tages which cannot be overlooked by
able-bodied young men.
To get Into the Guard is a very simple
process. To begin with it doesn't cost a
cent. The applicant for enlistment need
only apply at the Armory any week-day
night and ask for one of the company
commanders. If of good character and
physically sound, enlistment papers will
be made out without delay and the re
cruit will be formally assigned, following
examination by the medical department.
Upon assignment, the recruit receives
all uniforms and equipment free of
charge. If enlisted in the Infantry service
the outfit Includes blue and khaki uni
forms, blue overcoat, campaign hat and
blue service cap, Krag rifle, bayonet,
ammunition belt, canteen, haversack,
mess kit. leggings and hat cord. No
outlay of cash will be required for any
purpose and during such times as the
Guard is in service or out for encamp
ments all expenses will be paid by the
State or Government or both. Besides
expenses, regular army pay is invariably
allowed, and when funds will admit,
state pay is given for encampment serv
ice. The only requirements are attendance
at weekly drills, quarterly . and annual
inspection, annual participation in target
practice and the performance of such
military duties as are assigned on drill
nights, during encampments or in time
of service.
Drill nights for the entire Guard have
been assigned for the Winter drilling
season. The Third infantry is assigned
as follows: Mondays. Company" G. Ore
gon City; Company M. Salem: Companies
H and K. Portland. Tuesdays, Company
B, Portland; Company L, Pendleton.
Wednesdays, Company F, Portland;
Company D, The Dalles. Thursdays,
Companies C and E, Portland. Fridays,
Company A, Baker City; Company I.
Woodburn. Headquarters will meet as
heretofore, on Tuesday nights.
The Fourth Infantry drill nights are:
Mondays, C company, Eugene, and F
company, McMInnville. Tuesdays, E
company, Cottage Grove; A Company,
Eugene; G company. Albany. Saturdays,
B company, Ashland; D company, Rose
burg. Headquarters will meet every
Monday night at Eugene.
Battery A will drill every Friday night
and the Hospital Corps Tuesdays.
An order was Issued during the week
from Guard headquarters by General
Finzer changing the designation of the
battery from that of First Battery of
Field Artillery to Battery A, Field Artil
lery. While seemingly a mere matter of
form this order Is of considerably more
importance than would at first seem, in
asmuch as it again evidences the Inten
tion of the Oregon Guard to keep abreast
of the times, keeping behind in nothing.
The regular army artillery has been
bagain reorganized into regimental forma
tions ana the various batteries assigned
in lettered order. It was for this reason,
and in order to keep right up to the min
ute, that the designation of the battery
was changed back to the letter form.
Company F Is engaged in bloodless
battles this week on the stage of the
Baker Theater. The command, under
Captain O'Dale and Lieutenant Crouch,
has been engaged to appear in the pro
duction of "Barbara Frletchie," a war
time melodrama. It would have been a
hard task for the theater's management
to select a better drilled company
than F.
Colonel McDonel! spent last Sunday
skirmishing about in search of a new
rifle range one over which 1000-yard prae
tlce can be engaged In. Among the vari
ous places Inspected was Rocky Butte,
near Montavilla. With some , improve
ments it is believed this site can be
evolved into an excellent range. Whether
It can -be procured for the purpose is a
matter yet to be investigated.
The new gymnasium at the Armory
is nearly ready for use. In its appoint
ments It will be among the best In the
city, a large variety of apparatus being
included. It will greatly facilitate the
training of Guard athletes and will add
another attractive feature to the mem
bership. Cat and Rattler Fight 'One Hour. '
Exchange.
One of the strangest fights on record
was watched for nearly an hour at the
state forestry station in Santa Monica
Canyon by Supt. N. D. Ingham and his
assistants. Just outside the office a
three-foot rattlesnake and a pet tomcat
fought a fierce battle. When first ob
served the cat was crouched for a spring
and the snake was looking; for an open
ing to strike. The cat was exceedingly
wary and every time the rattler thrust
forth his head and fangs the cat avoided
the danger by quick sidesteps. The fe
line could not, "however, decide on a safe
point of attack, though gK-lng his antag
onist many hard stabs and scratches,
and meatlme spitting and yowling furi
ously. Finnaly Superintendant Ingham, fear
ing the snake might escape, finished It
with a club. There were nine rattles on
lt.'I don't think the snake could have
got the cat," said Ingham, "but it is a
question whether the cat could get the
snake."
Sixty Beaux bnt No OITerii.
Kansas City Star.
A young woman in Erie County, Kan
sas, has had 60 beaux since her debut a
few years ago, but- as yet no proposal of
marriage, and a female friend says she
does not know whether the Erie County
girl is socially a success or a failure.
Gets $.10,000 for fZOO Farm.
St. Louis Dispatch.
The diamond finds in Southwestern Ar
kansas started on the farm of John W.
Huddlestone, on the Little Missouri River.
He sot $36,000 for a farm that cost him
2Q0.