THE OREGOXIVN, WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 24, 190G.
tntered at the Tostofflce at Portland. Or.,
as Second-Class Matter.
SUBSCRIPTION' RATES.
fc7 INVARIABLY IN ADVANCE. 3
(By Mali or Express.)
DAILY. SUNDAY INCLUDED.
twelve months. 58.00
Elx. months -
Three months -zi
One month
Delivered by carrier, per year v.uu
Delivered by carrier, per month. ....... -
Le6s time, per week
Sunday, one year ....... 'rn
"Weekly, one vear (Issued Thursday)..- 1-00
Sunday and Weekly, one year.
HOW TO REMIT Send postofllce money
torder, express order or personal check on
our local bank. Stamps, coin or currency
are at the sender's risk.
EASTERN BUSINESS OFFICE.
The S. C. Bcckwith Special Agency New
STork. rooms 43-50. Tribune building. Chi
cago, rooms 310-512 Tribune building.
KErr ON SALE.
Chicago Auditorium Annex, Poatoffice
fiCews Cc. 17S Dearborn street.
St. Paul, Minn. CC. SU Marie. Commercial
Station.
Denver Hamilton & Kendrlck. 900-31-Eeventecnth
street; Pratt Book Store. 1214
Fifteenth street.
Goldfleld, Xetv-Guy Marsh
Kansas City, Mo. Rlcksecker Cigar Co.,
t Ninth and Walnut.
Minneapolis M. J. Kavanaugh. 50 S. Third.
Cleveland, O. James Pushaw. 307 Superior
ttrett. ,
New York City L. Jones & Co., Astor
House. . .v,
Oakland, Cal. W. H. Johnston, rourlcen.h
tnd Franklin streets.
Ogdcn Goddard & Harrop; D. L. Boyle.
Omaha Barkalow Bros.. 1012 Farnam.
i!fclagcath Stationery Co.. 130S Farnam; -40
rBouth 14th. .
Sacramento, Cal. Sacramento News
Jt30 K street.
Salt Lake Salt Lake Ne-s Co.. 77 West
Second street South; Miss L. Levin. -
'Church street.
, Los Angeles B. E. Amos, manager seven
Wtreet wagons; Bcrl News Co., 320 South
feroadwny.
Santa Barhara, Cal. B. "E. Amos.
Pasadena, Cal Bcrl News Co.
i San Francisco J. K. Cooper & C-'
l&Iarket street; Goldsmith Bros.. 230 sutler
tend Hotel St. Francis News Stand; L.
xJee. Palace Hotel News Stand; F. TV. Pitts.
T1008 Market; Frank Scott. SO EUls. s.
Vheatley Movable News Stand, corner Mar
iket and Kearney streets; Foster & Orear.
Terry News Stand. ,
Washington. D. C.-Ebbltt House. Pennsyl
ranla avenue.
ft
bpORTTJVNI). "VE UN ES DAY. JANUARY 24.
CONFUSION IN ritOI'OSlNC. LAWS.
It already appears almost beyond
Question that so many laws and ampnd
Wnts to the constitution will be pro
posed "by initiative this year that the
people may be compelled to vote against
enost, perhaps all. of them as the only
3afe course. At least a dozen are either
xn Hie already or are in course of prep
aration and will he filed later, nnd per
Jhaps more are to come. . One of these
tneasures is so long and presents so
many complicated questions that the
people could not possibly study it and
Understand its provisions and effects.
lYVhen all are submitted, the imss of
proposed legislation will be bewildering
and the voters cannot ven begin to
give the measures that full and careful
attention ihey ought to receive.
Two gross-earnings tax bills are pre
sented, conflicting in their provisions;
yet. if both are submitted, both may be
adopted, for every voter will be entitled
to vote for each. It will ibe clear to
every person that each measure might
easily receive a majority of all the
votes catl upon the question, for they
will not appear side by side upon the
ballot, both will have attractive titles,
and only those persons who have given
special attention to the subject will be
careful to vote for one only. If both
should be adopted, there would be in
terminable litigation to ascertain which,
if either, will stand.
Two amendments to the constitution
are proposed to secure reforms in the
state printing office, each conflicting
with the other in its term?. Because
of the prevailing demand for a change
In the method of conducting the print
ing office, both of these proposed
amendment's might be adopted. A local-option
amendment has been pro
posed and is on file already. The own
ers of the Barlow road have submitted
a measure conpelling the state to pur
chase their road and they are present
ing it as, primarily, a law . to abolish
tolls. Under this title it inight be
adopted by the people unless the sub
ject should be widely discussed and
lully understood. A constitutional
amendment is -being prepared for the
purpose of authorizing the Governor to
veto any item of an appropriation bill.
iA flat-salary amendment is in circula
tion for signatures, and is being numer
ously signed, although it is notoriously
defective in its verbiage and pernicious
in its provisions. A proposed woman's
suffrage amendment has been filed. A
number of other measures are tinder
Uvay and will be filed.
There are two of these measures
Twhich, from their nature, will receive
ionost general attention and discussion
the woman's .suffrage amendment wnd
ithe local-option law. There are inter
ests actively engaged' In supporting or
'opposing each of these, and the contest
wlll be centered upon them. Because
they are subjects of popular . Interest
end easily understood, they will occupy
attention largely to exclusion of the
other proposed laws and amendments.
Though all the bills may be read to
some extent, they will not and cannot
receive the thorough consideration they
must have if the people are to act de
liberately and advisedly.
This is not ra. reflection upon the In
telligence of the voters of this state. If
any one of these measures were taken
up separately and widely discussed, it
would be fairly well -understood. If the
3eople would give the necessary
amount of time to. examination of the
proposed laws and constitutional
amendments, they would get a reason
ably fair understanding of most of
them. But with so many laws pro
posed, some of them long and compli
cated, requiring special Information in
advance for Intelligent analysis, it is a
practical impossibility for all of them
to be acted upon by the people with a
full conception of their provisions.
One of the measures, that proposed
by the tax committee of the Willamette
Valley Development League, Alls a
pamphlet of sixty-seven pages. It not
only proposes to enact a gross earnings
tax on certain corporations, but a new
method of assessing and taxing rail
roads, and also revises the general tax
laws of the state. It is a Jong, compli
cated measure, upon which many criti
cisms nave been made by men who
have made a special study of tax laws.
It is a safe assertion that there is not
a farmer in Oregon who can study this
measure an hour a day for a week and
then tell what its provisions are and'
what its effects will be upon existing
laws, unless he has already made a
special study of tax laws. The public
imust examine these measures at odd
times, when other duties will permit,
land cannot give them that exhaustive
study which such a law demands.
Because a multiplicity of bills and
amendments have been Prepared, some
of them complicated and some of them
pernicious, the people, for self protec
tion, may quite likely be compelled to
vote "No" upon most or all of them,
lest confusion and litigation result.
LET THE COUNCIL GO SLOW.
The City Council will tonight con
sider three applications for three elec
tric lighting and power franchises for
the City of Portland, all of which go to
that body with favorable recommenda
tion of the street committee. It is desir
able, doubtless, to have competition in
electric lighting service, public and pri
vate; but it is nevertheless important
that in granting any franchise the com
mon interest be safeguarded in the most
careful and complete manner. It is
proper that an adequate franchise tax
shall be Imposed, and that in the gen
eral outcry against our public service
corporations the city do not nastily
give away something for nothing or
next to nothing. The Executh-e Board
has proposed a high tax for such priv
ileges as those so high as to be pro
hibitive, which was the evident design
of that body. The Council should not
go to the other extreme and fix the
tax on too low a basis.
But there is a still more important
consideration. No franchise should be
granted on any terms until the appli
cant shall have given Abundant evi
dence of good faith and ample guar
anty of his ability to carry out his
contract with the public A bond not
less -than $100.000 should be required
lh each instance. If either of these elec
tric light and power concerns is able to
make a large investment, and if It in
tends to do it. a bond will not be in
any sense a burden, but will on the con
trary be a condition the grantee will
easily and cheerfully meet. If the appli
cant cannot give the bond he should not
have the franchise. And there should
be no more overhead wlros in Portland.
That Is perfectly obvious. There ought
not to be two opinions on that question.
The Citv Council should proceed in
these weighty matters with caution. It
is a serious thing to grant one fran
chise, covering the streets of the whole
city. It is many times more serious to
grant three. And not one should be
given to any speculator on any terms.
town Tories.
Town Topics Is the name of a weekly
paper published in New York. It Is
owned by a stock company in which W.
K. Vanderbllt holds twenty-five shares
and 'Howard Gould twenty shares.
Other social and financial magnates
also possess stock, but the controlling
interest beloncs to Justice Deuel, of the
New York Court of Special Sessions,
and to Colonel W. D. Wann, witn nis
wife and daughters. Town Topics is
the best-known in America, nd the
most successful, of those papers which
subsist by preying upon the vice and
vanity of what is called society. This
vice, it need not be said. is. in its vari
ous forms, the principal vocation of the
idle rich, and A-anlty is the sole product
of their intellects. They live without
nurnose except to gratify their sensual
passions and no four of God restrains
them from draining to the lees tne
cup of fleshly enjoyment.
They, have no fear of God, for they
are atheists. "What they call religion
Is a scries of parades where they wear
a transient mask of sobriety the better
to display their persons and clothes.
Their prayers are a concession to fash
ion. Their benefactions to the clergy
are like morsels tossed to pet poodles,
and they prune, primp and coddle their
favorite preachers as they do their lap
dogs. Religion, though they make much
of its forms, has absolutely no effect
upon their lives, which consist of
sensual gratification, and nothing more.
They feel no abhorrence of cruelty, for
cruelty is the foundation of their exist
ence. They live -upon incomes from
land whose value has been created by
others, from loans of money which they
never earned, from profits pained by
hounding workmen with their wives
and children to Inexorable and dehu
manizing toil. Their diamonds are the
crystallized tears of starving women.
Their carriages are bought with the
ruined lungs -and twisted bones of chil
dren driven by hunger to precocious
labor. Their beauty is like the bloom
of a rose," whose roots descend into a
grave.
Desperately cruel and wicked, fash
ionable society regards neither the
rights of men nor the laws of God.
The .wreckers of the great insurance
companies were high-toned clubmen,
the perfumed darlings of artistic drawing-rooms,
the pillars of esthetic
churches. The corporation magnates
who tempt with their largess the civic
virtue of the starving workman, wring
ing from him under duress of the pangs
of wolfish, hunger the sale of his man
hood for gold, they, too, are masters of
the delicate art of lolling on em
broidered cushions and lisping ineffa
ble nothings into the pearly ears of
the dolls of fashion, aiarriage in high
society is too often like the coupling
of brutes, who part when passion is
gratified and go their "ways to new en
counters. Society shrinks from no excess of
vice, but vanity imposes upon it the
appearance of virtue. The worst of the
women who change husbands half a
dozen times a year wishes to appear
like a virtuous matron. The most des
perate Wall-street gambler desires to
pose as an estimable citizen; and this
gives Town Topics its hold upon them.
By bribing manicurists, kitchen maids,
confidential servants; by every low de
vice of eavesdropping, backbiting, slan
der; by appealing to malice, cupidity
and envy. Colonel Mann and Justice
Deuel collect the secret talcs of the evil
deed6 of the men and women in high
society. Then the proposition is made
to suppress the facts if the price is paid
for silence, otherwise to publish them In
Town Topics. Usually the victim
stands for the hold-up. If he does not,
then week by week Town Topics distils
its venom for his behoof; sends him
the clippings and patiently awaits the
sure result. By such methods Colonel
Mann is said to have squeezed some
thing like 4200,000 from men like TV. K.
Vanderbllt, J. P. .Morgan and others.
But its Tichest strike was "Fads and
Fancies," a book of sketches of the
lives of -society people, at $1500 a copy.
Those who declined to subscribe were
tortured into submission by the usual
methods of Town Topics, made perhaps
a little more touching than before. Col
lier's Weekly called this process black
mail. The judicial dignity and unbending
integrity of Judge Deuel were so of
fended 'by the harsh word blackmail
that he sued Norman. -Hapgood, editor
of Collier's, for criminal libel. The suit
is now pending in -New York, and to
Mr. Jerome falls' the congenial duty of
prosecuting Mr. Hapgood, who may
have made a legal slip, possibly, but
who bas certainly advanced the cause
of public decency and morals. It is
bad to bo vicious, but it Is worse to
prey upon vice. In this Infamous affair
high society plays the role of the paint
ed creature of the slums, Colonel Mann
and Judge Deuel that of the negro who
subsists upon the wages of her prostitution.
IT WAS A DREAM.
"Perchance," so runs the old madri
gal, "I may be dreaming, when I my
ills forget." Chief of Police Grltx
macher thinks we are all dreaming
when we our Ills remember. He be
lieves that a sort of enchantment has
fallen upon the people of Portland by
virtue of which they go about their
dally vocations in a perpetual maze,
seeing visions and dreaming dreams.
For example, Jast August the whole
population of the city experienced one
of these extraordinary hallucinations.
It attacked men, women and children
simultaneously. without apparent cause,
and took the form of the belief that a
lady named Van Dran had been mur
dered. This delusion persisted for a
couple of weeks before it was forgotten,
and while It lasted Chief Grltzmacher
and his subordinates dreamed that
they were searching for the man guilty
of the death of the unfortunate woman.
As a vision of the night it has all
been chased away. Mrs. Van Dran
was never murdered. Nobody poisoned
her ginger ale. The police never fol
lowed ny "clews" to find the criminal.
It was a dream. On another occasion
a disNnguished clergyman of the city
fell under a curious hallucination of
the same sort, though rather amusing
than tragic. He Imagined that a couple
of thugs met him on the street one dark
night and demanded at the pistol's
point his watch and money. The curi
ous feature about the clergyman's delu
sion Is that it still persists and that to
this day he seems to remember hand
ing over his valuables to the thugs.
The fact is, of course, that he never
owned a watch and never had as much
as 130 at any one time in his pocket.
On this occasion also the police
dreamed that they searched for the
thieve?, but it was all mere fancy, or,
perhaps, somnambulism. Probably the
latter: for it has been observed that
the officers do a great deal of walking
and talking in their tsleep.
Other visions more or less disquieting
have vexed the imaginations of the peo
ple of (Portland of late as they move
about under, their strange enchantment.
One queer delusion is that they march
up to the counter of the gas company
once a month, like feudal vassals to the
stronghold of their liege lord, and pay
exorbitant tribute for the privilege of
burning . wretchedly poor illuminant.
And there are others. So numerous and
vexatious are these hallucinations that
Portlanders hardly feel like approving
the next line or two of the same old
song: "Break not the blissful seeming,
O do not wake me yet." The seeming
is not at all blissful, and they would
be glad to waken ma soon as ever they
can. Possibly Chief Gritzmacher. "who
has made the great discovery that we
are all asleep, may also discover, should
he devote his mind to it, some way to
wake us up.
THE TARIFF AND CANADIAN IMMIGRA
TION. The appearance In this country In the
year 1905 of more than 1,000.000 foreign
ers bas been a subject for considerable
grave comment among political econo
mists who view with anxiety the in
creasing congestion of labor in our
great cities. We have reached a period
in our internal development where
quality, and not quantity, should be
the preferred feature in immigration,
and admission to citizenship of one for
eign capitalist or even fairly well-to-do
agriculturist is of more value to the
country at large than that of a horde
of impecunious laborers. The Immigra
tion topic Is one that ' Is Interesting
Canada as well as the United States,
and It Is quite clear that the Ameri
cans last year suffered some heavy
losses of a highly desirable class of cit
izens, whose departure could not well
be offset by appearance of European
paupers at our Atlantic ports. More
than 50.000 Americans went over the
line into Canada last year. Very few
of them were of the laboring classes
which we could so well spare, but
practically the entire force of this great
industrial army was made up of set
tlers possessed of sufficient money to
buy and improve farms or erect manu
factories. Men do not leave a rich country like
the United States in such wholesale
numbers except to better their condi
tion, and it requires no great amount of
study to disclose the principal induce
ment held out to them. Canada was
exploited and developed 'by the Cana
dian Pacific Railroad, as a business
proposition. This powerful corpora
tionwhich is practically backed by the
British government, was quick to rec
ognize that, in order to make money
with- the railroad, it was necessary to
secure settlers to till the soil. Cheap
land was one of the strong Inducements
held out to immigrants, but. as the
railroad ran for hundreds of miles com
paratively close to the American bound
ary line, where quite naturally there
could not be much difference In land
prices. It became necessary to offer
other Inducements. These wore easy
to find, in fact, they had been provided
by the Americans In the form of a pro
tective tariff which enabled the farmer
on the Canadian side of the line to pur
chase his machinery at from 25 per
cent to 50 per cent less than the price
exacted from the American farmer.
There was very little timber in the
best agricultural districts in Canada,
and the demand for lumber was enor
mous. Much of this demand was sup
plied by American manufacturers, who
sold what they could to Americans un
der a protective tariff of ?2 per thou
sand and then dumped the remainder
on the Canadian markets at lower
prices than prevailed on this side of
the line. The Canadian lumbermen
writhed under this kind of competition
and for a long time nave been endeav
oring to put up the same kind of a
tariff barrier against American lum
ber that we have erected against Cana
dian lumber. But the "long-headed"
management which has always charac
terized the Canadian Pacific threw its
influence in favor of the consumer, who
was also about to become a producer
aB soon as his house, fences and barns
were built
The settler can still buy lumber as
well as farm machinery, sugar, tea,
coffee and all other necessities, and
most of the luxuries, of life at much
lower prices than are demanded on the
American side of the line. The in
creased cost to the American farmer,
due exclusively to the tariff, becomes a
fixed charge which runs against hl3 In
vestment to the end of his career. The
oretically, he Is supposed to get some
thing out of the protective system In
the way of a heavy duty levied against
American wheat. This protection, how
ever, is absolutely worthless, for the
reason that both the Canadian and
American farmer are growing, wheat
for the European and Oriental markets
and prices are not governed in the
slightest degree by the tariff on wheat,
but instead by the Liverpool market
Not only can the Canadian farmer
secure a complete working equipment
of American machinery for much less
money than his American competitor,
but the railroads, exclusive of any di
rect government aid, are In a position
to haul his freight at less cost than
the American roads can perform a sim
ilar service for the American farmer.
This is due to the fact that the Cana
dian road can buy American rails, ties,
spikes, fishplates, cars, locomotives and
all other equipment at much lower
prices than the American roads. Due
consideration df these facts regarding
actually existing conditions will show
richest and greatest country on earth I
by 50,000 well-to-do settlers. It will
also show that the American protective
tariff Is Immeasurably more valuable
to Canada than It Is to the United
States.
Manager Ballalne. of the Alaska Gen
tral Railroad, seems to think that it is
essential to Alaska's welfare that she
do business with more than one port.
This is a wise conclusion, which Is
slightly overdue. Alaska Is capable of
suslaininga large population, and itwill
be Impossible to attract that population
or to develop the resources of the coun
try without some assistance from ports
outside of Alaska. The time Is ripe for
Portland to get in and make an effort
to secure a share of the trade now
breaking away from or outgrowing
the facilities of Seattle. Enormous div
idends will not Immediately follow es
tablishment of a steamship line from
Portland, but well-directed effort and
ta- little patience will bring results so
surprisingly favorable that in a few
years Portland will wonder why she so
long neglected her opportunities in that
big field for commercial exploitation.
"Nowhere is the consumption of gold
bricks greater than in this thrifty cor
ner of New England." wrote Tom Law
son, as he described the avidity with
which the Bostoncse put up their good,
hard coin for worthless gas stock. As
this was before the Town Topics expose
reached its most interesting stage, it is
possible that "easy money" was more
plentiful at Boston than at New York.
This opinion must now undergo a
change, since we read of the ease with
which Colonel Mann, of Town Topics,
extracted thousands from astute .finan
ciers like James R. Keenc. J. P. Mor
gan, T. F. Ryan, W. K. Vanderbllt and
a host of others. As a rich, juicy field
for the sale of gold bricks, little, old
"Yapville-on-the-Hudson" has Boston,
or any other city, beaten a mile.
A bulletin issued by the Department
of Commerce and Labor, after present
ing a grand array of statistics upon
the subject, says that the International
commerce of the world tody is about
fifteen times as much as at the begin
ning of the last century, while the
world's population is only two and a
half times greater. This Is due to de
velopment in agriculture, manufactures
and means of transportation, the latter
especially, since it has made merchant
able many commodities that would not,
formerly, bear the cost of carrying.
Thus the commerce of the world as a
whole has grown from 52.50 per capita
In 1S00 to $14 per capita at the present
time.
A few hasty readers who saw the
headline in Monday's Oregonian an
nouncing the death of Benjamin F.
Hayden in this city got the Impression
that the deceased was the pioneer law
yer and Indian War veteran. Captain
Ben Hayden. who rode the circuit on
a mule in the early days, and made
trouble for his opponent whenever he
got a chance to talk to a Jury, Is still
in the land of the living, and. though
not as vigorous as when he led his com
pany in the Indian wars, yet he is en
joying life on his farm near Eola. in
Polk County.
Colonel Mann had a pleasant way of
declining to mention unpleasantly in
Town Topics gentlemen who l&ancd
him large sums of money. And the
Colonel seems to be surprised and
pained that the public Is disposed to
look upon this little journalistic habit
as blackmail. But the names came out
In the end. They generally do. And It
may be supposed that polite society in
New York is shocked and grieved that
the Associated Press has sent the
names of some of Its lending lights
throughout the United States.
"Buy A. O. T.." which. Interpreted,
means "any old thing." was the sage
advice which, made John W. Gates fa
mous as a prophet when the upward
moveof stocks began many months ago.
Colonel Mann, of Town Topics, appar
ently heard of the advice and "cop
pered" it by selling. Gates, with a con
sistency that is admirable, stuck to his
precept and took 520.000 worth of woll,
whatever Town Topics had to sell.
Summing up the press dispatches, we
might say that If he is not killed in
the hazing process, the modern fighting
man in either arm of the service stands
a reasonably good chance of dying
from old age.
There Is stll one way open to the sci
entists who used to put in eight hours
a day writing prosy accounts of their
researches for the Government reports.
They can sell their stuff to the maga
zines. The names of Uncle Russell Sage and
Hetty Green seem to be missing from
the list of distinguished Wall-street
characters who took an "Interest" in
Colonel tMann's Town Topics.
A little heavy firing off the Venezue
lan coast would be warmly welcomed
by .newspaper readers, though Castro,
possibly, might see the matter In a
different light.
John D. Rockefeller has dumped an
other installment of tainted money on
the Chicago University. See market
pae in a day or two for revised price
list on oil.
Something seems to have been over
looked by the German Socialists In
their "Red" Sunday preparations. Was
it the Cossacks or the vodka?
The Seattle baseball club Is clamoring
for an even break. It must indeed be
true that the Seattle spirit Is decadent.
THE- SILVER LINING.
Have you sot anything left for the
grand opera season after you have
taken your wife (or somebody's wife)
to hear Calve? Five bones! Ha-ha-happy
days!
.
The exposures of how Colonel Mann
made his money with Town Topics anct
other convenient enterprises In the
East exemplifies anew the fact that
there are perhaps 25.000 smart men in
New York and they are getting the
money out of the rest. The Idea thai
because a man Is rich he Is smart is
the most widely entertained untruth
that there Is. The biggest fools in the
world are among the rich. In a higher
sense a friend of mine considers John
D. Rockefeller the colossal jack-ass or
the world, chiefly because Rockefeller
goes on centering himself in money-making-
far beyond his wants, thereby
renderlng himself utterly Incapable
of peace, contentment or happiness. 1
don't think I want much money my
self. But I could stand a little merely
for the sake of variety.
Rockefeller has givan another mil
lion and a half to the Chicago Univer
sity. Thus is restored to the public
domain another small part of the great
modern pirate's gigantic defalcation.
Harrlman and Hill trying to block
each other only produce friction that
will make oach work harder to give
Portland superior transportation fa
cilities. If any fat woman wants to stop feel
ing sorry about her size let her watch
the grace of Calve. Calve is as agile
as a cat.
The indicted packers are making
faces at Roosevelt, and he Is looking
at his big: club.
The last stand of the noble Indian
is being- made against the white man
In Seattle. A half-breed Sioux Is de
fending his title to some tidelands
against the encroachments of some
voracious New Yorkers. There are
torac things that we thought even New
Yorkers did not covet.
This is from the New York World:
Two huinlrptl toasts oC th proper Broadn-ay
cripites have bn cotnpilJ by "Mile. Mixer,
of New Yerk and VazSr," and put on the
convivial market la the form of an Inexpensive
Mill brochurp. The design U to till a tons
fell want, and nil It Just right. Maiiemolfellc
can do this for she !. Ir private life. Mrs.
Julia Doty, wife of a New York hotel man.
Hera are a few o the Mixer maxims, for
those who mix:
To Marriage The happy cate which re
semMes a pair of shears: no Joined that they
cannot heconve oepn rated; often moving- In op
posite directions, yet always punlshlnr any
one who comes between them.
To Money The finest linguist In the world.
To Lovers The have-heens; the are-nows
and the may-he.
T llemr The place we are treated, best
and crumble moat.
It is better to smoke here than hereafter.
Oar absent friend, although out of sight,
wc recognise them with our glasses.
If on my theme I rightly think.
There are ave reasons why men drink:
Oood wlae. a friend, because I'm dry.
Or. lost I should be bye-and-bye.
Or any other reason why.
It is not rank, nor mirth, nor state.
It's git-uo-and-git that makes men great.
There la the best In the wo rut of us.
And the worst in the best of us.
So it behooves each one of us
Not to talk about the rest of us.
ZHunn nnd Supermen.
Said Colonel Mann to old John D.,
"You'd better buy some stock."
John D. replied most cheerfully,
"Go put yourself in hock."
Said Colonel Mann to Chauncey M.,
"I-iend me a thousand bones!"
Said Chauncey. as he passed It o'er,
"This for my sins atones."
The Colonel told his friend J. P.:
"I want ten thousand straight!"
The banker snapped his Jaws nnd said:
"You'll pet It while you wait!"
Mann mentioned to the Senator,
"Subscriptions for my book
Cost each a thou. Plea?e take one, sir."
But nary a one he took.
Spake Colonel to his pal Belmont
Bel of the haughty mien
"PunRle quick!" And haughty Bel
Has never since been seen.
And so on down the lurid list
Of shining- marks rich men!
The Colonel caught them with his fist,
"Where Kolcey caught the hen.
The Colonel's now less debonair;
He's where misconduct leads;
Jerome is bound to strike him where
Sweet Mary wore the beads.
A. 31. BALLARD.
Seattle Offers to Help.
Seattle Times.
The Columbia Klver jetty proposi
tion Is therefore In a very critical con
dition Just now. it no work Is done for
two years or more, and much of the
present work is destroyed In conse
quence. It will be far along- In the new
century before there is any hope of
seeing- the great work finished.
Just at this time the State of Wash
ington has a full and able-bodied del
egation In Congress. Tho Columbia
River Is a "Washington as well as an
Oregon stream. The Improvement in
question is not contemplated to be of
benefit to "Washington, however, but Is
soluly In the Intorest of the shipping
facilities of the City of Portland. Fur
thermore, up this way, there Is little
confidence that the Columbia River will
ever bo a stream which will be clear
of obstruction at Its mouth no matter
itow much money the Government may
spend, and it Is believed the time will
never come when grout ocean vessels
of -modern depth can navigate its
waters. But this 13 an emergency case.
T.io Government engineers have un
dertaken the work. Oregon is crippled,,
and If the members of the "Washington
delegation can do anything- to help our
Portland neighbors out of their dis
tress they should take off their couts
and go to work, and In the front ranks
of tho workers should be Senator Piles,
Seattle's energetic member, who by his
acts could impress all members of Con
gress that there is no Jealousy among
thc cities of the Pacific Northwest
when it comes down to the question of
improvements.
Jaipur's Color Scheme.
Exchange.
Tn the City of Jaipur. India, visited the
other day by the Prince and Princess of
"Wales, all the streets are broad and
straight, and cross one another at right
angles, and every edifice, public or pri
vate, is of the same uniform pale, pink
hue. '
Tlio Same Yesterday.
Flicgende Blatter.
Judge What is your age?
Fair Witness Twenty-nine, your honor.
"That's exactly what you said two years
ago."
"Well. I'm not going to say one thing
today and another thing tomorrow."
CHINA'S PRIDE AROUSED.
America In Danger of Losing Trade
"Worth a Billion Dollars a Year.
J. W. Bashford, resident bishop of the
Methodist Episcopal Church at Shanghai,
China, writes, under date of December IS,
1S05:
"I wish to write you with reference to
the necessity of the United States modify
ing her Chinese cxolusion net.
"I heard Dr. Arthur Smith, the well
known author or 'Village Life In China.
Chinese Characteristics'- and 'China in
Convulsion.' say last Summer that China
has made more progress in the last five
years than any other nation upon the face
or the globe. He added that he did not
mean that China had increased her output
of coal or iron more than the United
States, or that she had built more addi
tional miles of railroad; but that tho
change of spirit, the new attitude she has
assufned toward Western civilization,
marks a more profound change and Indi
cates greater progress in China than In
any other nation In the world.
"In a conversation a few days later with
Sir Robert Hart, the ablest Englishman in
China. If not in the entire Orient, he said
that Arthur Smith's statement is substan
tially correct, and used practically the fol
lowing language:
"l came to China In 1KH. and for 43
years the Chinese empire seemed like a
closed room, without a breath of air en
tering from other nations. Now the win
dows and doors are wide open on every
slde. and the breezes are blowing through.
We may expect some storms, and possibly
nn occasional typhoon; but the fresh air
from the world has entered China, and
she Is rapidly changing from an ancient
to a modern empire.
"The mineral wealth of China coal and
fron Is the greatest In the workl. and it
Is almost untouched as yet. Railroads
and modern inventions will be introduced
Into China during the next few years, and
vrtih her splendid laboring classes China
will make rapid advance.
"I have no doubt that we can force upon
the Chinese government an acceptance of
the exclusion act substantially In the form
in which Secretary Hay left It. Such
modification as Secretary Hay made, to
gether with a wise and Just enforcement
of the treaty, will be an immense im
provement over the old treaty, with Its
harsh enforcement down to 15.
The offensive features of the present
exclusion act. and also or the exclusion
act as drafted by Secretary Hay. are Its
mention of China by name and Its spe
cific exclusion of her laborers. Wu Ting
Fang. ex-Minister to the United States,
said to me:
" 'Do you rank us below the headmen of
Borneo?
"On my reply in the negative, he said:
" 'But you admit representatives of Bor
neo and the people of every other coun
try, while excluding the Chinese by name.
"Dr. Hsih. confidential adviser to Vk-e-roy
Yuan Shi Kai. the most progressive
Viceroy in China, said to me:
'Your exclusion treaty places the Chi
nese distinctly below the Malay races,
whereas you must admit that in civiliza
tion and in economic efficiency we are
distinctly their superiors.
"I admitted his statements in regard to
tho superiority of the Chinese over the
Malay peoples.
" 'But.' he added, 'you exclude us by
name from America, and do not exclude
the Malays by name.
" 'We have not the slightest objection,
nor has the Chinese government the
slightest objection to the exclusion of
Chinese laborers. Indeed, the Chinese
government does not want Chinese labor
ers, brought up In this empire, to go to
America, but rather to stay here and pay
thelr taxes for the support of the Chinese
government. But wc want you to exclude
them In some other way than by mention
ing us by name. "
Four methods of settlement have been
suggested: First, permission to Chinese
to enter the Philippines ami Hawaii,
though It Is problematical whether the
Chinese will be satisiicd If they are ex
cluded from the United States: second,
strict enforcement of existing immigration
laws which would keep out nearly all un
desirable Chinese; third, if these prove
insufficient, amend them with an educa
tional test: fourth, and most practical of
all. an exclusion treaty forbidding the en
trance of Chinese Into the United States
for the purpose of manual labor and
Amorlcans entering China for the same
purpose. Such a treaty, while mentioning
the Chinese by name, would also mentfon
ourselves by name, and would not be of
fensive to their pride.
"Summing up the matter in a para
graph, the trade of that part of the Orient
extending from Singapore to Vladivostok
amounts to a billion dollars a year at the
present time. The trade of Australia,
with "her scant population, amounts to a
billion dollars more. If the trade of
China and Japan should become as great
In proportion as the trade of Australia,
you can see It would be worth tenfold our
entire European trade.
"The trade of Japan, an Oriental coun
try similar to China, has increased seven
teen fold within the last SO years. If the
foreign trade from Singapore to Vladi
vostok should make such an increase
within the next 20 years its value would
astonish the world.
"Manchuria has been slightly opened
during the last five years, but her foreign
trade is now five times as great in propor
tion to the population as that of China
proper.
"It la not unreasonable, therefore, to
suppose that tho trade of China will in
crease fivefold within the next five or ten
years. Looked at from any point of view,
we may anticipate an Immense Increase
of trade in China, and the only barrier in
tne way of Americas capture of a large
proportion of that increase Is our exclu
sion treaty."
English and American Slums.
Public Opinion.
English slums are spreading Ieprous
Iy. In our own country the slums are the
receiving stations for poor foreigners,
whence they may rise through abundant
opportunity to better things. In England
the slums are cesspools into which men
sink.
NEWSPAPER WAIFS.
She married an octogenarian, didn't
she?" "I guess not. He looked to be as
white as any of us." Cleveland Plain
Dealer,
"Where are you going?" "South.""
"What for?" "Rheumatism. "Gee!
Can't you get enough of It here? Cleve
land Leader.
First Millionaire How is your machine
working? Second Millionaire Very poor
ly. Jrlaven't paid a fine for over three
days. Life.
"You don't resent that author's flagrant
plagiarism?" "No." answered Miss Cay
enne. "After reading tho original portion
of his work. I wish he had plagiarized
more." Washington Star.
"You told me this automobile was a
snap." said the new purchaser. "And
didn't you find it to be one?" asked the
dealer. "I should say so. Something
snapped every five miles." Chicago Dally
News.
"Don't those poor girls work hard be
hind those counters!" exclaimed the sym
pathetic lady. "Yes, but mercy! I've
worked a good deal harder In front of
them, matching samples." Detroit Free
Press.
"Wc should always." said the jail evan
gelist, "consider any circumstances which
add weight to the steps we take." "I do."
murmured the convict, sadly, as he cast a
casual glance at the ball and chain. Bal
timore American.
Rimer I showed this sonnet to Crittlek
and he seemed quite struck with It. He
liked the Idea, anyway. Brightley (In
credulouslyIs It possible? Rimer Yes.
I told him this was my Idea of a perfect
sonnet, and he said the idea was certainly
original. Philadelphia Press.
SHUT OUT FOREIGN SHIPS..
Congress May Kefuse American Reg
ister to Wrecked Vessels.
OREGONIAN NEWS BUREAU, Wash
ington. Jan. 23. The advocates of ship
subsidy legislation have serious doubts
about their ability to put through the
GalHngcr "subvention" bill, so they have
turned their attention to other legislation
aimed at foreign-built ships, which. It is
believed, will prove a benefit to American
shipyards. These interests are now back
ing a bill to repeal the law granting
American register to foreign vessels
which have been wrecked in Ameriean
waters and extensively repaired in Amer
ican shipyards.
It has been represented to the commit
tees of Congress that this law hus beeh
very widely abused in late years. " Ameri
can Interests, seeking to get vessels for
the coastwise trade at a minimum cost
and for less than they can build new
ships in our own yards, have encouraged
the wrecking of foreign vessels along the
American coast, with the deliberate Inten
tion of having them repaired in American
shipyards in order that they nmy there
after fly the American flag ami sail un
tler American register.
According to representations mad to
the committees, the coastwise trade is be
coming overcrowded with vessels of this
type, and the bill now under consideration
is intended to check this practice. Th
repeal of the law in question will h.ve
the effect of forcing the construction t
ntore ships in American yards, in order
to meet the demands of the coasting
trade. There is bright prospect that this
bill may pass.
In the last Congress thi$e same In
terests enacted two laws intended to ac
complish some or the results sought for
in the straight subsidy bill. Om whs a
law requiring that all Government . sup
plies shipped by sea shall be carried in
American bottoms (provided reasonable
rates can be obtained), and the otmr.
which goes into effect on July 1. re
stricts the Philippine trade to American
ships. These two laws were enacted
through the efforts of the men inter
ested in ship-subsidy legislation and.
while they fail to accomplish the main
purpose of the direct subsidy bill, they
are believed to be drawn In the interest
of American shipbuilders, and are a step
In the direction of ship subsidy.
It Is doubtful if there will be much op
position to the bill relating to American
register for wrecked foreign vessels. The
two bills of the last Congress were en
acted with little difficulty, and it h not
believed there will be any more objection
to the bill now pending.
WANTS NO KECIPKOCITY.
Canada Prefers to Have Immigration
of American Capital.
OREGOXIAX NEWS BUREAU, Wash
ington. Jan. 23. Amerlcun Consul Dud
ley, of Vancouver. B. C. has called the
attention of the State Department to
an interesting interview with Sir
Thomas Shaughnessy. president of tn
Canadian Pacilic- Railway. Sir Thomas
Is an expatriated American, ami was
once a clerk in the employ of tho Chi
cago. Milwaukee & St. Paul Railroad.
He was persuaded by Sir William Van
Home, also an American by birth, but
now a Canadian citizen, to migrate to
Canada, but to continue railroading.
The remarkable record of these men.
their success in several lines of in
dustrial life, the opportunities afford
ed them in getting exact information,
and th fact tnat both were born in
the United States give great weight
to their opinions. Mr. Dudley says tnat
Sir Thomas was knighted by tho Que-n
of England for eminent services, that
there are few men who understand tne
material resources- of the Dominion
better than he does, and that there is
no man whose words will carry greater
weigjit at home and abroad than those
of Sir Thomns. In the Interview re
ferred to. when asked what he thought
Canada wanted of the United States,
ho replied:
"What Canada wants of the United States
is Just what It has been civlng a (ht th
past "0 or :M) years. We want a tarilf wail
between the two natlono. high that it
cannot climb over it. We want to proftt by
the imc policy which ha 5o ahted In
building up the fritted Statf. We ben--in
protection and home imiinttry. aa h
ahall keep our tariff high enough to encour
age It.
American manufacturers ara avewrtns:
trade hy coming acroes the border ami inrild
Ing branches here. Many million dollars f
American capital have airctnly gone Into
such branches. Xearly alt of. their chief
industrial Institutions are .tatlMhiig them.
Take the American Locomotive Work. f.
instance. They are building eam mjdne-
for this railway. They put up a awmh'r
for us last year, and we shall buy more m
the months to come. We are glad to wel
come such Institutions. Wc want their
goods, but we want them made n Cana
dian soil and with Canadian labor.
Immigration to the Xorthwesi conttane.
It Is only at its beginning. We are having
out there what has been going or In the
United States s-lnce your organization as a
Government. The farmers of the Atlantic,
when the lands became valuable, moved ver
the mountains to Ohio and took up home
steadn there. As that country was settled
and prices rose, the fartper with two or
three sons sold out and moved on to Illinoi".
buying a block of cheap land. When Illinois
grew, the march was on West to Wisconsin
and Iowa. Your Western farmers are sell
ing out their high-priced lands and cropp
ing the border for the rich wheat slt f
Canada. They can get farms there ffr
themselves ami their children, and Shey se
that the same rise In values is bound
take place as 'has occurred la the United
States. Values have not advanced unduly
In respect to farming land. There are
many million acres yet to be settled, and
good lands are cheap. In some of tho towns
prices seem to me extravagant. In Winni
peg, for Instance, real estate Is higher than
In Montreal.
Gaging Streams of Idaho.
OREGONIAN NEWS BUREAU. Wash
ington. Jan. 23. The United States Geo
logical Survey is maintaining 12 gauging
stations on Idaho streams. Seven of these
are essential in connection with the recla
mation projects now tinder way in the
state. These are as follows: Montgom
ery. Snake River; Moran. South Fork
Snake River: Highland, Boise River;
Lyon. South Fork Snake River; St. .An
thony. Teton River: Ora. North Fork
Snake River, and Fremont, Fall River.
The remaining five stations wero estab
lished to obtain Important data in rogard
to floods and available water supply for
storage. It Is probable that new stations
will be established on the Payette River.
Many requests for information regarding
the stream's behavior arc recoived by the
Government.
A Uoosovelt Bridal Serapbook.
Atchison Globe.
Congressman Nicholas Longworth has
begun work on a bridal serapbook. It will
contain newspaper clippings of all that s
said about his engagement to Miss Alice
Roosevelt. For his peace of mind, it Is
hoped he will lose the scissors and upset
the paste. Nothing has so far been writ
ten that will make Mr. Longrowth feel
complacent, and If he reads all that is
written, he may back out and flee. There
will be nothing in the book to make a
rainy Sunday shorter.
Cheaper to Move Than Pay.
Smart Set.
"How did he happen to settle In Chi
cago?" "Because he owed everybody in New
York."
Money anil Manners.
Exchange.
There are worse friends to have than
those without money: Those without
manners.
'aBBSBSSBSSSSSSSSSSSBSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSBBSBBSCc -