THE MORNING OREGONIAN. THURSDAY,. OCTOBER 19, 1905.
Entered at the Postofflce at Portland, Or..
as second-claw matter.
SUBSCRIPTION BATES.
INVARIABLY IN ADVANCE.
' (By Mall or Express.)
Dally and Sunday, per year
Dally and Sunday, six months 5.00
Dally and Sunday, three months j5
Dally and Sunday, per month -55
Dally vlthout Sunday, per year J.uO
Dally without Sunday, six months 3.80
Dally without Sunday, trree months.... 1.0.;
Dally without Sunday, per month .Cj
Sunday, per year ,
Sunday, six months
Sunday, three months
Dally without Sunday, per week -15
Dally, per week, Sunday Included 0
THE WEEKLY OREGONIAN.
(Issued Every Thursday.)
Weekly, per year - too
Weekly, six months
Weekly, three months - 30
HOW TO KEMIT Send postofflce money
order, express order or .personal check on
your local bank. Stamps, coin or currency
are at the sender's risk.
EASTERN BUSINESS OFFICE.
The 6. C. -Beckwlth Special Atescy-New
York, rooms 43-50 Tribune bulldlnc. Chicago,
rooms 510-312 Tribune building.
KEPT ON SALE.
Chicago Auditorium Annex. Postotflce
News Co.. 178 Dearborn street.
Denver Julius Black. Hamilton & Kend
rick, 006-012 Seventeenth street; Pratt Book
Store, 1214 Fifteenth street.
Des Moines, la, Moses Jacobs, 300 Filth
street.
Goldfleld, Ncv.-'-F. Sandstrom: Guy Marsh.
Kansas City. Mo. Rlcksecker Cigar Co.,
Ninth and Walnut.
Los Angeles Harry Drapklnx B. E. Amos.
614 West Seventh street; Dlllard News Co.
Minneapolis M. J. Kavanaugh, CO South
Third.
Cleveland, O. James Pushaw. 307 Superior
street;
New York City I. Jones & Co., Astor
House.
Oakland. CaL-W. II. Johnston. Fourteenth
and Franklin streets.
Ogden-JGoddard &. Harrop; D. I. Boyle.
Omaha Barkalow Bros.. 1612 Farnamj
Mageath Stationery Co.. J30S Farnam; 248
South 14th.
Sacramento. Cal. Sacramento News Co.,
420 K street.
Salt Lake Salt Lake News Co.. 77 West
Second street South; National News Agency.
Long Beach B. E. Amos.
San Francisco-J. K. Cooper & Co- 746
Market street; GoldBmith Bros.. 230 Sutter
and Hotel St. Francis News Stand: L. E.
Lee. Palace Hotel News Stand; F. W. Pitts.
-100S Market; Frank Scott. 80 Ellis: N.
Whcatley Movable News Stand, corner Mar
ket and Kearney streets; Foster & Orear,
Ferry News Stand.
Washington, D. C Ebbltt House, Pennsyl
vanla avenue.
PORTLAND, THURSDAY, OCTOBER 19.
THE HARRIMAN SYSTEM.
First of all things that Oregon wants
and needs. In the way of Internal de
velopment, Is a railroad across Middle
Oregon. Such road, crossing the Cas
cade Range from some point in the
Middle or Upper Willamette Valley,
traversing Central Oregon and connect
ing with the Oregon Short Line at
Ontario, would afford the means of
development required for great part
of the area of Oregon. The main rea
son why progress of the state has
been so slow Is that this line through
its central part has been neglected.
Such line, through the middle of the
state, would throw out laterals right
and left, or north and south, covering
or reaching every important locality.
Centers of population and business and
Industry would quickly be established.
As In other localities of similar nature
arid or semlarld where railways
have been built, every Wnd of develop
ment has rapidly followed.
Such line through Middle Oregon,
with Its branches right and left, would
naturally belong to the Union Pacific
system. It should be constructed by
this system, and operated by It and in
connection with It. If Mr. Harrlman
will construct this line and the neces
sary branches, good will and earnest
support of all Oregon will be his.
, If, also, he will cause the great in
fluence of the great railway system
under his control to be employed in
proper ways for getting help at Wash
ington for the work in progress at the
mouth of the Columbia River, he will
do another thing which tend pow
erfully to establish and to maintain
cordial relations between the people of
Oregon and the Union Pacific and
Southern Pacific systems.
There is reason to believe that con
structlpn of the Nehalem-TIIlamook
Railroad is now assured. The posi
tive announcement will soon come.
Already it has been announced by the
Southern Pacific that It will build from
the Umpqua Valley to Coos Bay. Active
preparations for this work are going
on. The "Harrlman System" is in po
sition to do more for the State of Ore
gon than any other. It may be hoped
it will see Its way to do, speedily, what
it ought to do.
THE FACTS ARE SPEAKING.
"Let the facts speak for themselves,"
says Pilot Commissioner Noland in a
communication to The Oregonian re
garding the depth of water on the bar.
Reiterating the "official statement" of
the Pilot Commission, printed several!
days ago, Mr. Noland attempts to de
fend the pilots in endeavoring to place
this port on a twenty-four-foot basis.
The facts In the case are: The bar
pilots notified the master of the British
steamship Imaum that it would be
unsafe for him to load his vessel deeper
than twenty-four feet He disregarded
their-advice, loaded to twenty-five feet
seven inches, and was taken to sea
without delay or difficulty.
The British steamship Coulsdon,
drawing twenty-five. feet one inch, ac
cording to surveyor's certificate, left
Portland Tuesday morning, reached
Astoria the same evening, and passed
on out to sea yesterday without en
countering any difficulty whatever.
These are facts which all of the theo
ries or explanations that can be cooked
up by the pilots or their commissioners
-will not affect
Mr. Noland has offered nothing new
to the controversy. He merely repeats
what the pilots have told him, and cor
roborates the generally accepted belief
that the commission Is under the dom
ination of the pilots, instead of being
their master. This is not In any man
ner a reflection on Mr. Noland. He is
undoubtedly doing the best he can
under the circumstances, and as well
as any man could do. who has little
practical or direct knowledge of pilot
age or shipping matters. It is the sys
tem, not the individual, that Portland's
shipping interests are protesting
against.
. Prior to the' appointment of Mr. No
land, an effort was made by Portland
"business men 'to secure the appointment
of a prominent Astoria shipping man,
who grew up on the Columbia River
bar, and was familiar with every detail
of the work on the bar as well as with
the personal merits of the pilots en
gaged. Unfortunately for Portland, it
was learned that the candidate, al
though quite wealthy, had been only
en Irregular contributor to the local
campaign fund, and of course it became
necessary to replace him with & man
having the proper qualifications. The
present controversy has had one good
result. It has taught the Portland busi
ness men, who are most vitally Inter
ested In the depth of water on the
Columbia bar, that reform of a most
drastic nature is needed In the present
law regarding pilotage matters.
THE REAL. QUESTION.
It is alleged, of course, that, "all
things considered." the Ladd .bid for
water-pipe was lowest. It Is argued,
of course, that the preference given to
the Ladd bid will "keen money at
home." It will, doubtless and that
money will amass Itself in the Ladd
bank.
Every transaction of this nature puts
up pleas of like description. But in the
long run the method, the process, the
system, results in further augmentation
and increase of fortunes and estates
already plethoric and dropsical. The
serious question for Portland Is, "wheth
er everything here Is not soon to be
absorbed In and pay tribute to the
"first families." The scheme Is to allow
nobody to do business or to pursue any
Industry here that does not pay the
tribute. (
Control of the sources of power in
city, county and state, of all official
action and of public financial opera
tion, lies at the basis of the scheme.
It is .necessary to satisfactory results
and to complete success, that power
may be had over official action.
Beginning has been made In Port
land. It Is to be extended, if possible,
to the affairs of the state. If not
checked, it will be the beginning of
unbroken plutocratic control. Money,
not opinion, is To rule hereafter-sunless
these pretensions and purposes of the
politicians of plutocracy be rejected.
The simple question is, whether the
people are to have anything to do with
direction of affairs in Portland here
after, or whether everything Is to be
dictated to them by an arrogant power
whose basis is money, and whoso ulti
mate purpose is a fathomless and in
satiable greed of gain.
In other words, the question now is.
and henceforth will be, whether an oli
garchic plutocracy is -to rule In Port
land, and In Oregon, or whether the
people are to have control of their
affairs.
Plutocracy always argues that It
stands for the welfare of the people,
and for religion and for morals and for
philanthropy. How pious all the Rocke
fellers and the McCurdys and the Mc
Calls are,- to be sure! The like thing,
the same thing, Is beginning here.
ROOSEVELT IN SOUTHLAND.
President Roosevelt began his South
ern tour with a little speech at Rich
mond, the capital of "The Confeder
acy" and the site of Libby Prison. He
kept silent about the prison, but he
had something to say abodt the Con
federacy, or at any rate about the
Southern soldier, and if he spread the
treacle on rather thick, perhaps that
was best under the circumstances.
Pretty nearly all the South has to be
proud of is the record of her soldiers
in the Civil War. A wise orator ad
dressing the vain and touchy Virgin
ians would of course remember this,
and Mr. Roosevelt is wise. The ever
lasting coupling of Lee's name with
Grant's grates a little upon the ears
of those who remember what these
generals were respectively fighting for,
but we must learn not to mind. The
progress of National amenity will prob
obly teach us to hear Davis and Lincoln
similarly coupled before many decades
have passed; or If we still maintain
that Lincoln was the greater and better
man, we shall do it apologetically and
with much deference to Southern pride.
The sensitive feelings of the people who
tried their best to ruin the most bene
ficent government ever devised by man
and fought with determined zeal to per
petuate negro slavery must not b"e ruf
fled. Mr. Roosevelt had to put some sort
of pepper Into his speech to make It In
teresting, and since he could not with
good manners whack at the "rebel
brigadiers," he took it out of the Agul
naldlsts. Their "hurtful folly," he said,
"would stop the whole work of civil
ization by a silly persistency In trying
to apply" to the Philippines theories of
government only suited to ourselves.
This does nicely for pepper. After a
polite hint to France that we are some
what interested ourselves in affairs
about the isthmus and in the Carib
bean Sea, he passed on to deal with the
trusts. It is of no use to think of sup
pressing these unholy monsters; the
most we can do Is to regulate them and
harness them to work for us instead of
destroying us. The doctrine is wise.
We have dealt In exactly that way with
water, fire and electricity. All that we
have lacked In trust affairs has been
some Edison or Watts to do the har-'i
nesslng, and perhaps we have the very
man we want in Mr. Roosevelt. At any
rate we all think so. We must pass
good laws to regulate the trusts and
then get up the grit to make them
obey. This was the gist of the Presi
dent's message to the children of the
sacred soil, and It was timely and true
The pity is that he had to gain a hear
ing for it by praising men who never
ought to "be praised and beslobbering
with ambiguous platitudes the great
ethical Issue of the nineteenth century.
But perhaps the most we can expect
of even a man like Roosevelt Is to at
tend to one ethical issue at a time. The
dead past must bury Its dead. The
memory of her heroes who fought for
slavery Is the one ewe lamb of the
sunny Southland. Mr. Roosevelt would
not be the David" to take It away. Cer
tainly he would not when he expects
her fair women to smile upon him and
her chivalrous Vardamans to applaud
his speeches.
VANISHING BUT NOT PERISHING SEALS.
Professor David Starr Jordan, in a
communication to The Oregonian, still
clings to his theory that the fur seals
are disappearing, because of the on
slaughts of the pelagic hunters. The
dependence placed on Professor Jor
dan's theoretical knowledge of seal life
was largely responsible for the policy
of the United States Government In
handling the sealing question twenty
years ago. That policy drove a fine
fleet of American sealing schooners to
the protection of the British flag, and
transferred to Victoria, from San Fran
cisco, the Columbia River and Puget
Sound, a business which since that time
has reached an aggregate volume of
millions of dollars. It gave to a few
San Francisco millionaires, for an in
significant annual remuneration, a
monopoly of the business of butchering
seals on the Pribllof Islands, and pro
tected the monopoly with a fleet of
revenue cutters, wljich ruthlessly seized
6ealers operating in waters over which
International courts decided that the
United States had no jurisdiction.
"The only way we know anything of
the number of the fur seals on the
Pribllof Islands," says Professor Jor
dan, "is by the extent occupied by their
breeding-grounds." Taking this for a
text, the professor proves to his own
satisfaction that seals are fewer in
number on the Pribllof Islands than
they were years ago. This no one de
nies, and no Inference that they were
not scarcer than in former years was
made in the editorial note which pro
voked the communication from Profes
sor Jordan. The point which The Ore
gonian sought to emphasize was that,
while the club of the fur monopoly's
butchers, and the cruel branding Iron,
had driven the seal in terror from the
Prlbllofs, It was not at all clear that
there had been a material decrease in
their numbers. Sea captains along the
coast last Spring reported vast herds
of the fur-bearers moving north, and
the Increased catch of the Victoria seal
ers proves that more than twenty years
of pelagic sealing, coupled with the In
human butchery on the islands, has
not served materially to reduce the size
of the herds that roam the seas and
drop their young on remote breeding
places, where fur monopolies have not
yet found them.
Every one at all familiar with the
sealing industry will recall the enor
mous catches made on the Japan coast
a few years after the seals began leav
ing the Prlbllofs. A few years later
they appeared off Cape Horn in vast
numbers. The late James G. Swan, of
Port Townsend, who for more than
forty years made a close study of seal
life, and whose practical knowledge of
the matter was unquestioned, shortly
before his death wrote an interesting
article regarding the habits of the seal.
Among other points set forth was the
following:
I consider our law regarding Xur seala as
a monumental humbug system Inaugurated
solely for the benefit of the Alaska Com
mercial Company and Its successors. "We are
told that the teals are decreasing In num
ber and oon will be exterminated, as they
were said to bo at Cape Horn, and the facta
arc cited aa parallel case. The seals were
driven from Cape Horn by the greed of the
hunters as they aro being driven from the
Prlbllofs by the action of the far company.
But the fur eeais have not been exterminated
at Cape Horn, nor will they be exterminated
when the last one leaves the Pribllof Iriaads.
They -will simply go to some other place. They
will not be exterminated, notwithstanding the
howls of the fur dealers of San Francisco,
but they will surely be driven from the Pribl
lof Islands.
From the time that the seizure of the
Black Diamond made the American
Government the laughing stock of the
world, by landing the prize crew at
Victoria, until the payment of the
$400,000 damages by this Government to
the Canadian sealers, the sealing ques
tion has been so badly handled by our
statesmen that It has cost the Govern
ment millions, and has yielded nothing
In return except rich tribute for the
California fur monopoly. Professor
Jordan, in closing, terms the statement
of the sealers as to the timidity of the
seal as "simple nonsense." Such a
statement, even from Professor Jordan,
proves nothing, for practical sealers
have for years characterized the most
of Professor Jordan's views regarding
seal life by the same term.
RANCID RIGHTEOUSNESS.
Beware always of the man who
prates of civic righteousness and pro
fesses to be better than his neighbor.
The Oregonian's experience is some
what extended; but It hasn't heard yet
of anybody who has confidence in
the Pharisee.
It is universal that you are to be on
your guard against the man who wears
his "righteousness" on his sleeve. The
Oregonian thinks Mayor Williams as
honest a man as Mayor Lane, and a
far abler one. It thinks "Jack" Mat
thewswith whom it never could have
anything in common as fit to govern
Portland as "Bill" Ladd though the
signs are these two may now go to
gether, to govern the city.
"Jack's" method is to "work" poli
tics In small ways, for such crumbs and
pickings as can be got out of office
and division of official emoluments.
Bill's" method Is to work the whole
scheme for all that "high finance" can
do.- it means control of contracts for
municipal works of all sorts, for pipe
lines, street pavement, bridge construc
tion and what not; for control and sale
of franchises of every kind street-car
lines, electric lighting and electric
power; lfmeans rake-off on the sale of
bonds and perpetual interest, clipped
off with coupons. "Jack's" method is
humble, indeed, compared with "Bill's,"
and not to be thought of In comparison
of profits.-
And "Jack" Is humble, too, In these
particulars that he has no thought
of hiring the pastor of an orthodox
church to help him in his schemes, and
doesn't aspire to control of newspaper
acolytes who may burn incense under
his nose.
Truly, "civic righteousness" now Is
established In Portland. We have a
factory of It, whose product looks and
smells like the stuff that falls under
condemnation of the Food and Dairy
Inspector.
INTERNATIONAL STOCK SHOW.
This project has been seriously con
sidered in Portland since the closing of
the recent show at the Lewis and Clark
Exposition grounds. In many ways
that event was a revelation to Eastern
breeders and exhibitors. With one ac
cord, they expressed their gratification
at the unexpected excellence of the
stock raised on the Pacific Slope, and
at the Instructed interest evinced by
the man.y spectators.
One after another expressed to M. D.
Wisdom, secretary of the show, appre
ciation of the management of the whole
enterprise, and desire to become regu
lar exhibitors if an annual show should
be held here of an International char
acter.
Mr. Wisdom suggests that the earli
est possible action Is needed, in order
that announcement may be made to the
annual meeting of the American Short
horn Breeders' Association and others of
corresponding Importance, at their an
nual sessions In the first three days of
December next, at the International
Stock Show, at Chicago. He believes
from what has been stated to him in
plain terms, that these associations
would each announce handsome -prizes
In addition to those proposed by the
new Portland organization.
Before leaving Portland officials and
members of the National Association
were earnest in expressions of hope,
first, that an International Stock Show
would be held annually on the Pacific
Coast, and that Portland would be
chosen for its headquarters. Generous
spirit was shown by thejeading exhib
itors, and by officials of local associa
tions, from both California and Wash
ington. Of course, Portland would like
to get the new international show. It
must be admitted that Oregon Is the
most central place, and the most ac
cessible to breeders of all the Pacific
Slope, including those of British Co
lumbia and Western Canada. This city
has shown that it has special advan
tages of railroad transportation, and
that it can handle satisfactorily a large
enterprise of this nature.
In all kinds of stock, cattle, sheep,
horses and swine, Oregon has proved,
by Its splendid showing, that It has
within Its -borders the nucleus of a most
excellent annua! display. Breeders and
exhibitors, from the East especially,
commented on the public's expert ap
preciation of the exhibits. They said
they were used to have their stock ad
mired by passing visitors, but not to
see such widespread interest.
It Is very evident that Oregon is to
hold foremost place as a stock-breeding
state. The advantages of maintain
ing an International Livestock Exhibi
tion at Portland will be recognized by
residents of the entire Northwest.
SILETZ TIMBER CLAIMANTS.
One of the facts brought out at the
recent trial of Jones and Potter In con
nection with timber lands claimed as
homesteads by old soldiers at the Insti
gation of these defendants has not re
ceived due attention. It was proved
that all kinds of applications by set
tlers on lands thrown open on the SUetz
reservation were held up, as the term
goes, In the General Land Office by dl
rectlon of the Secretary of the Interior,
as a result of the cloud cast on all by
the knowledge gained by the Govern
ment that some were fraudulent.
Within a very short time after this res
ervatlon was opened, as far back as
1S93, crowds of settlers of all classes
rushed In, to the total of 700 or upwards.
It Is fair lo credit the great majority
with good faith In their action. Yet the
tax rolls of Lincoln County are not en
largeu by their names. A common
practice In such cases seems to be to
defer to the last moment perfecting
titles. The object Is to prevent the
names of these claimants appearing as
owners op the records, and consequent
ly on the tax roll. Title remains in the
United States until patents are Issued
Whe"n the time at last arrived, past all
possibility of postponement, then Inter
vened the Secretary's action, and none
of these claimants obtained patents.
The county is the loser of all taxes
which would have become payable long
ere this by these hundreds of settlers
It is another Instance of vicarious pun
ishment of the many for the misdeeds
of the few. The result of the trial has
Justified the Secretary in this exercise
of his discretion. But this, falling In
due degree on every taxpaylng citizen.
Is possibly retribution for the lax Ideas
which have led so many into overstep
ping the line between "smartness" and
crime. .
Grand Duke Cyril, son of Vladimir,
has been disgraced and stripped of his
Imperial titles and. honors by his cousin.
the Czar, because of his marriage to
Princess Victoria of Saxe-Coburg-Gotha,
the divorced wife of the Grand
Duke of Hesse. The imperial edict had
gone forth against this marriage be
cause the bride was a divorced woman.
The Princess Is a very gay and willful
young woman, fond of military reviews,
fast horses, hurdle-Jumping ami the
like, and led her sedate and Imperious
husband, the Grand Duke of Hesse, a
sorry life while she presided over his
court at Darmstadt The divorce was
granted for Incompatibility and final re
fusal of the Grand Duchess to remain at
Darmstadt The only child of the mis
mated pair a daughter died In Poland
en route to St Petersburg, where she
was to be brought up by her aunt, the
Czarina. Her death was supposed to be
the result of poison given In her food,
the motive not being disclosed, but it
was darkly surmised to be in line with
her mother's determination to outwit
those who conspired to place her child
where she could not see her. If the Im
placable character and willful nature of
this woman Is correctly shown In this
surmise, Cyril may have cause to regret
that his death in the harbor of Port
Arthur when one of the Imperial ships
of the Russian navy went down some
months ago was averted.
Herr Goldberger, who Is said by the
dispatches to be an authority on the
tariff question, has excited attention by
an article In the Berlin Tageblatt in
which he predicts that eventually all
European nations will combine to op
pose the United States with protective
tariffs. The German tariff expert may
be somewhat prejudiced Just at this
time on account of the Inability of Ger
many target anything like fair treat
ment from the United States In the way
of reciprocal trade relations. Never
theless, the possibilities of American
trade some day encountering Just such
an obstacle as he mentions are not as
remote as some of the hidebound
"standpatters" of the tariff would have
us believe. The home demand of our
rapidly Increasing population will for a
time take up the lion's share of our
products, but when production gets too
far In the lead of consumption we will
be In need of the rest of the world for a
market
From the standpoint of either pleas
ure or business, the excursion which
left Portland last evening for Lewlston
Is certain to be a success. . The party
includes a number of Portland busi
ness men whose knowledge of the ter
ritory that will be visited Is not as
perfect as It should be. A better ac
quaintance wlthr the territory and a
personal meeting with the people Is
sure to be productive of much good.
As to the social side of the. excursion,
no Portlander ever traveled the route
that Is mapped out without being made
to feel that the people had been his life
long friends. Lewlston, the objective
point, will have a special attraction for
the travelers, for the reason that the
railroads are at last to admit Portland
to the rich trade field for which the
Panhandle metropolis is the center.
The resignation of Mr. Ladd from the
Water Board Is opportune and brilliant
It Is one of those brave resignations
effected under fire. But the Lane gov
ernment of the city remains under plu
tocratic dictation and control.. There
are yet, however, some things Mr. Ladd
ought to resign. Let us suggest the
trusteeship of the Johnson estate.
Naturally, Joe Young suffered a great
nervous shock when sentenced to prison
for shooting Van Dran. When he re
covers from it he will have a few years
to think of the shock he might have had
on the gallows If he had killed Van
Dran.
President McCurdy Is evidently paid
5150,000 for what he doesn't know about
the Insurance business. If he doesnt
know, the policy-holders cannot find
out That's the way to run a great life
insurance company.
SILHOUETTES. .
Paul Morton now favors publicity aa a
remedy for the ilia of corporation mis
management He was not so keen ontho
subject a few months ago.
It is apparent from Taft's remarks
anent Alice Roosevelt?- gadabout gifts
that an excellent pawnbroker was spoiled
to make a tolerably fair Secretary of
War. Stilf the Crown Princess should pay
that duty.
When Is this persecution of "Our Best
Citizens" to stop? August Erickson might
Just as well be a common member of
Congress for all the immunity he enjoys
at the hands of our courts.
By all means let us turn the bridge
piers Into signboards and then paint a
oda ad. on "Tho Coming of the White
Man," fly jvhlsky banners from the Court
house flagstaff and put a mammoth pill
placard-on the summit of Mount Hood.
Portland enjoys an enviable reputation
for Its exportation- of wheat Also for
Its consumption of rye.
-
John L. Wells has resigned as Adjutant
General of the Oregon Department G. A.
R. because his usefulness to the order la
Impaired by reasdn of his connection with
the land-fraud cases. Certain other gentle
men In public life, who shall be name
less, might with great propriety follow
his good example.
Florists and theatrical managers are
usually the heaviest losers- from frosts.
That ferryboat named for Judge Lionel
R. Webster seems to need alteration as
often as the dictionary which bears the
name of his Illustrious ancestor.
The" management has received assur
ances from Sheriff Word that he will not
attempt to Interfere with the chariot rac
ing In "Ben Hur."
A Youthful Financier.
Father Bill took Little Willie to church
last Sunday. It was the boy's first visit
to the sanctuary, and he seemed greatly
Interested. When he returned home ho
seemed radiantly happy, and his delighted
mamma remarked: "You must like
going to church, sonny." "You bet." an
swered Little Willie. "It was great I
got a quarter whon they passed the
money, but I don't know how much pop
took."
Eugene V. Debs is jttlll delivering lec
tures. "Hark From the Tomb," etc.
At the recent shapefest held In Madison
Square Garden tho Judges failed to find a
perfect woman. General Minor, however,
did not officiate.
Dicky Dingbat's Essays.
First Grade. Age 3.
Scries A. No. 4.
AUTOMOBEELS.
Automobeels are Invented by the devil to
kill Manyacks and Innocent Bystanders,
pop calls Them infurnel masheens, and
once when ho had to Duck One quick ho
called them something Wors.' automobeels
are not New. They have had them meny
years. Only they ust to be known as Jug-er-Nuts.
That was In India, and so the
peepcl that ride in Them now are Gen
erally Indians. Automobeels have a lot
of innards, but no conslnce. and alco the
as ma. they cost More than a house and
Lot and smell wors than a Goat they
are out of Order more oftner than Pop is
at the deacons' meeting, and make blzness
for the under Takers. Peepel ride m them
to make other Folks think they aro Rich,
and some of them to get drunk and raso
cane in.
I think Automobeels ot to Be run In, But
they wont run in the mud. when I get to
be a man I am going to chew tobaker
and carry a gun, but I do not. think I will
have a Automobeel.
Tht tobacco crop In Kentucky Is the
largest ever known. This will probably
have an Injurious effect on tho cabbage
market
Her Turn to Laugh.
The happy milliner sat In her. shop
And said to herself, "Here's where I cop
Out the money, for I have got the drop.
In a business way, on the blooming lot"
t
For Winter Is coming on apace.
The women are running each other a race
To see who can get the most feathers and
lace.
'Oh, this buying Fall hats Is a merry
chase.
From morning till night through the busy
town
Tho girls are all hurrying up and down;
And it don't help a bit for the men folks
to frown
As hat bills go up and the falling leaves
down.
ARTHUR A. GREENE.
Calling: on the President.
Frank Puttnam. In National Magazine.
Of a sudden the door of the executive
chamber swung open with a bang, and
before I could get squared, around In my
chair, or out of it, T. R., with a motion
something like a cross between the gaits
of a grizzly bear and a panther, was
across the room and had my baseball fin
gers wrapped In the tightest grip they
ever knew. Aa they say In the prize ring,
he didn't give me time to get set where
fore the little handful of conversational
nuggets I had planned out for him never
got delivered. All that I could think of
to tell him was that in common with my
folks out West, I was entirely satisfied
with the way he was running things. He
expressed his appreciation In a grin that
was half a laugh, and told me he was
glad to hear it I bade him good morn-
ing.. out oexore x got uirougn tne door I
saw him pumping the right hand of my
friend the priest heard him tell that
gentleman to come Inside presently, and
saw him make what ft la not, I trust.
Improper to designate as a running Jump
at the six black bishops over In the far
corner.
When I got outside, in the road. I said
to myself, "Good Lord! If we Democrats
only had a man like that!"
Joke on the Doctor.
Harper's Weekly.
A Baltimore physician says that recently
he boarded a Charles-street car that was
sadly overcrowded. He soon observed a
big German sprawled over an area suffi
cient to seat two persons at least, while
Just in front of him stood a poor, wan
woman hanging to a strap. Indignant at
this exhibition of selfishness on the Dart
of the German, the physician tapped him
on the shoulder, saying:
"See. here! Why don't you move a llttle.
so ttiat this tired woman may have a
seat?"
For a moment the German looked dazed
Then a broad smile spread over his coun
tenance as he answered:
"Say, dot's a Joke on you, all right!
Dot's my rife!"
SIMPSON ANDJMNGLEY'S HAT
How Kansan Floored Republican
Lender in Wordy Combat.
OREGONIAN NEWS BUREAU, Wash
ington. Oct IS. Alas, poor Jerry; we'll
never see his like again.
That thought has occurred to every man
who served In Congress with Jerry Simp
son, of Kansas, and to every man who
knew Simpson and watched his brief but
notorious career In the House of Repre
sentatives. Jerry Simpson belonged to the "freak"
class of Congressmen, yet, unlike most
freaks who have found their- way Into
the National Legislature, he left a lasting
impression behind him; ho not only made
a host of friends (for everybody liked him
In spite 'of his eccentricities), but he es
tablished a record as a debater which no
other man In the freak class ever had.
Jerry Sfmpson was a product of Popu
lism, and yet his first election to Congress
was brought abqut by the combined vote
of Populists and Democrats. The second
and third time he was elected as a Demo
crat, yet he was always known as a
Populist, because of his views on public
questions. Outwardly, no greener man
than Simpson ever came to Congress. He
was a "rube" In appearance, and had
not been In Washington many days before
a newspaper man discovered that he wore
no socks. That was enough. From that
flay Simpson was known in the papers
and among his fellow-members as "Sock
less Jerry." a name that has stuck by
him ever since. Because of his crude ap
pearance and the fact that he was a rank
Populist, members generally thought ho
was a dub, but they soon discovered their
error. He proved to be a rough diamond.
In a way.
Simpson was a nervous, high-strung
man. a quick thinker and a ready talker.
Many a time he would smart under the
lashing he or the Populists received at
the hands of tho Republicans, and ho was
always ready with a reply. He had a
keen sense of humor and a bountiful store
of wit. which he used to good advantage,
and never did Simpson come off second
best from any tilt, even with the biggest
and brainiest men on the Republican side
of the House.
In his six years In Congress, Simpson
achieved the distinction of being the only
man who floored Nelson DIngley. the Re
publican leader and chairman of the ways
and means committee. Moreover. Simp
son was the only man who. by careful
prodding, could call DIngley to his feet In
retort. The brillant but serious man from
.viaine was inclined to wave aside criti
cisms from other members, but somehow
he could not rest under assaults from the
"sockless" member from Kansas.
Simpson's most notable achievement in
debate was a tilt with DIngley. an event
widely chronicled at the time. In which
the high silk hat of the Maine statesman
figured prominently. The House was In
a mellow mood; members on both sides
of the party aisle were making free-and-easy
speeches, regretting this and that,
and heaping apology upon apology. In a
half-serious manner. Finally Jerry Simp
son rose, and began:
Mr. Speaker: A jrreat many gentlemen on
this side have been regretting a great many
things today, and now I have some regrets
to offer. I regret the lack of harmony on
the Republican side today, and I can only
account for 11 In one way. During the extra
session of this Congress a matter of
considerable comment was the hat worn by
the eminent chairman of the ways and
means committee. The gentleman's elegant
silk tile became, so to speak, a political bar
ometer. "We always knew In the morning If
that gentleman laid his hat on the desk it
meant we were going to take a recess for
three days. If the hat failed to be laid on
the desk. It Indicated that we were to do
some business that day.
Those were the days when the DIngley
bill was before the Senate, and the House
had nothing to do. DIngley was, as floor
leader, called upon to make the motion to
adjourn each day.
-
Mr. Simpson continued:
During this, session I have watched with con
siderable Interest the career of that hat. It
has been to me an Indication whether or not
there would be harmony in the Republican
ranks. We all noticed that, when any Ques
tion came up requiring the unity of the Re
publican party, they always rallied around
the distinguished gentleman from Maine; but.
If he went out for a few minutes perhaps
to his committee-room he left his hat lying
on the desk; and In the absence of that hon
orable gentleman, that hat became tho rally
ing point So. many a time gentleman on
the other sldo "rallied round the hat, bors,
and rallied once again." to uphold Republican
supremacy.
I have been wondering, Mr. Chairman, what
magle power was in that hat to thus rally
my Republican brethren. Had It not that
same potency as the white plume of Harry
of Navarre? I could not penetrate the mys
tery. So, yesterday, noticing In passing that
the hat of the gentleman from Maine was
lying on tho desk. It occurred to m the time
had 'come to solve the mystery. So I gazed
at the hat: and what discover!' do you think
I made? I saw In that hat the magle word,
eo plain that anybody could read It. "London."
Then I aoked myself. Can It be possible that
the distinguished chairman of the committee
on ways and means, he who was the father
of the bill to promote American Industry to
protect American Industry, to protect the la
boring man. Is actually wearing a hat of for
eign importation?
Hats having been on the free Ust In the
"Wilson bill and now, under the present tar
iff, subject to a wnall protective rate of 10
per cent, can ft be that the eminent chair
man of the committee on ways and mean?, the
protector of American Industry. Is depriving
the American laborer of that renal! pittance?
Can It be possible 'that he brought his hat In
along with that large amount of wool I have
been Informed he shipped In before his bill
went Into effect? Perish the thought. I can
not believe It.
Another point suggested Itself to me that
perhaps the gentleman thought It perfectly
consistent and right to get hln hats from the
same source from which he gets "ha financial
policy from Lonbard and Threadneedle
streets.
This brought DIngley to his feet and
he tried to pass over the criticism with a
mere sling. "The remarks of my friend
from Kansas would seem to Indicate that
he Is 'talking through his hat,' as usual."
he said.
"No," shouted back Simpson, "I am
talking through hours."
DIngley saw that he would have to make
some explanation, but he only made mat
ters worse when he added:
Since the gentleman has raised this very
Important question over that hat. I desire to
say that It was purchased from a dealer In
my own city, who obtained It from a manu
facturer In New Tork. "When I bought It, I
noticed that it had this mark "London"
In It. I asked the dealer how It happened
that a hat made In New York had the label.
In addition to other marks, of a London
maker. He said It was the habit of many
manufacturers In New Tork and some "other
places to put a London mark Into goods
made In this country. I asked him why It was
done. He said that "there were a great
many dudes In this country who were willing
to pay more for a hat labeled 'London' than
'New York."
Up jumped Simpson. "The gentleman
from Maine Is not one of the 'dudes,' I
hope."
That was the limit It floored DIngley;
the House couldn't restrain Itself, and
Simpson's victory over the shrewd chair
man of the ways and means committee,
the whole Incident above related, occupies
a conspicuous place in the well-remembered
word battles of Congress.
Everybody Pleased.
Boston Transcript
Busily Intent upon fighting the devil
with his own weapons, the enterprising
pastor of a New Jersey congregation has
engaged an attractive young woman to
superintend the dancing lessons In his
"people'3 palace." The young men are
reported to bo Joining the class rapidly
and the devil Is possibly just as much
pleased as anybody else.
REACH HIGHEST RANK.
Two Oregon Men Elected Thlrtj
Third-Degree Musons.
WASHINGTON. Hot. IK Tha
preme council for the Southern Jurl
diction. Scottish Rlto Masons, toihl
considered the report of the commltd
on nominations, and after a few hoi;
session adjourned until tomorrow
Among? knights tnmmimdiM- of til
court of honor who were elected to til
honorary 33d degree were the follovj
Ins:
California Joseph David Abraham
Robert Kneeland Dunn. William Parld
Fillmore, ail of Snn Francisco. John 3D
tin. William Schuyler Moses Mirris SirJ
Inoff. Frank Cheater Van Schalck. Pen
winsiow weldner and William Rhod
Horney. Los Angeles.
Oregon C. A. Dolph. Portland; C.
Lowe, Eugene.
Montana John T. Bachus and W.
Tonkin. Butte.
Washington E. S. Deebo and E. B Bu
wen. Seattle; C. M. Lee. Tncoma- H
Tyler. Olympla.
There were 22S knights commar ler
tho court of honor elected. Admlmi
and ex-Governor Alva Adams, of Co!
raao, were among the number. Th- co-j;
ch ioaay adopted tho report of the cor
mittee on jurisprudence as to thr defir.l
tion ot citizenship, requiring members
be citizens of the United States.
STEAMSHIP GARONNE IS SOtJ
After a Varied Service She Goes
Genoese Syndicate.
SEATTLE. Wash.. Oct. IS. (Sp
cial.) Frank Watcrhouse & Co. t
day announced the sale of the ste:im-l
uaronne to a Genoese syndicate. Til
boat has been delivered.
The Garonne was tho a mnr-ir. .i,
Which took most Of th Pnrr rthil
refugees and a large number of so
mers nome irom fort Arthur, Whl!
On tho way to n Ttusnlnn nnrr M ti
dlers mutinied and the officers of tlj
Doar. were compelled to put In to Ca
cutta and ask for assistance In quell
mg me troops.
Oritrlnall V tho flnrnnno ,--, c k-,m,-
around here for the Alaska tra le bt
she ivas too expensive. The Goven
ment chartered her as a transport d.:
Ing the Spanish-American wir, ai
suosequeniiy sue was tied up agal
wKiernouse uo. nave been trying
get rid of her for some tlmo.
COUIiSDON GOES OUT EASILl
.Drawing Twenty-Flvo Feet, Slf
Crosses Bar Safely.
ASTORIA. Or.. Oct. IS. iSnecInl V
The British steamshin fTonlsdon rmsJ
ed out at high tide this afternoon. Slj
was drawing 25 feet, and was tnkcj
out Dy fiiot ainttnews. who Is now
the pilot schooner.
Going to Raise the Manzanltn.
The steamer Glenoln will leave dowi
the river at 6 o'clock this morntr
having In tow three barges loadci
with the equipment to raise the Mail
zanlta. J. H. Roberts, who has tlj
contract for tho work, will go dow
at tne same time with a force of
men. On the way down to tl" wrec
carpenters will build the trusses
the barges, so that when the Manzaii
ita Is reached there will be uo unneJ
essary delay In beginning wrecklnl
operations. The Glenola should rea.
the wreck by 3 o'clock this afternoc
and Mr. Roberts Is confident that til
start of raising the Munzanita will l
commenced before tomorrow mornlnl
The Oceano was scheduled to leail
the drydock yesterday afternocn at
o'clock, but owing to some minor rj
pairs being unfinished she will not 11
lowered until this morning at S o'cloci
She will then move up to the Portlar
Flouring Mills for her cargo.
WILIi FIGHT FOR HER SOSl
Mrs. Tnggnrt Prepares for Iioi
Struggle in Court.
WOOSTER. O., Oct IS. That Mr
Grace Taggart will make a long flgll
for the custody of her sons. Culver arJ
Tlddles, was made apparent tonlghl
Captain Taylor, one of the attorne;-!
for Mrs. Taggart. gave notice of appei
from judgment of Judge Eason as
the custody of the boys and a bond l
$4000 was furnished so as to take tlj
matter to the Circuit Court. The Oh
law, which gives a child of 10 or ovti
the right to elect with which pareil
ne prefers to live. Is to be made til
basis of the appeal.
This action was hastened by Captai!
Taggart sending word that he wanttj
Culver ready to leave with him tonigll
for Columbus, although he had not ill
tended taking the boy away until Sal
urday.
CHINESE ARMY MAXEUVEI
Yuan Shi Kal Will Show Off Hi
Modern Soldiers.
TIENTSIN. Oct. IS. Viceroy Yuan
Kal and staff started yesterday mornlnl
for the army maneuvers, which are to ti
held In the neighborhood of Paotlngfil
from October 23 to October 26. The for
elgn attaches, representatives of all thj
powers and press correspondents left thll
morning.
These maneuvers will be the first ot thl
kind ever held In China. They will bj
held on entirely modern Hues, and ui
wards of 40,000 men of all arms will bl
In line.
OFFICERS ARE NOT RELEASE!
Moorish Brigands Still Hold Brltls
, Prisoners for Ransom.
TANGIER. Oct IS. The report thrJ
the two British marine officers car
tured by Moroccan tribesmen had beel
released is untrue.
Heath of Casper H. Bauracr.
ST. LOUIS. Oct IS. (Special. ) The fur
eral of Casper H. Baumer. formerly
Portland. Or., who died yesterday after
noon, aged 75, will be held tomorrow
afternoon from his residence. He Is sur
vlved by one son. Henry H. Baumer. anl
two daughters, Mrs. Emma Broctje ani
Mrs. Anna M. Wobbe.
TJ7nrv W. Baumer Is a well-known East
Side business man ana a memoer ot thl
Ar-tr cFnnflu firm of H. Baumer & Co.. ol
372 East Morrison. He resides at 660 EasJ
Alder.
Togo and His Officers Worship.
;FOKIO, Oct. IS. A report from Yamadi
says that Vice-Admiral Togo, accompaniej
bv the Admirals and Captains of hi!
fleet his staff and 2000 armed marines ani
1000 unarmed, proceeded to the great teml
pie today at Ise, where they worshipec
Tho sight was Impressive.
VIce-Admlral Togo Is expected to ar
rive In this city on October 22. and exj
tensive preparations are being made fol
his reception. A huge triumphal arch 1
In course of erection In front of th4
Shimbashl railway station.
Jerry Simpson Has Quiet Day.
WICHITA. Kan.. Oct IS. At U
o'clock tonight ex-Congressman Jerr
Simpson was sleeping: soundly. Hi
passed a quiet day. His son, Lestej
Simpson, and family arrived this mornj
ing from Roswell, N. M.