-8 .
THE MORNING OREGOyiAN, TUESDAY, AUGUST 29, 1905.
Entered at the Poetofflee at Portland. Or.,
as second-class matter.
SUBSCRIPTION BATES.
IXVAKIABLT IN ADVANCE.
(By Mall -or Express.)
Dally and Sunday, per year 0- I
Dally and Sunday, six months 3.00
Dally and Sunday, throe months 23
Dally and Sunday, per month W
Dally -without Sunday, per year 7.60
Dally without Sunday, six months 3.90
Dally without Sunday, three months... 1.95
Dally without Sunday, per month 63
Sunday, per .year 60
Sunday. bIx months... 1.25
Sunday, three months 65
BY CARRIER.
Dally without Sunday, per week -: .15
Dally, per week. Sunday Included... .20
THE "WEEKLY OREGONIAX.
(Issued Every Thursday.)
Weekly, per year 1.50
"Weekly, six months...: .75
Weekly, three months - 30
HOW TO REMIT Send postoWco money
order, express order or personal check on
your local bank. Stamps, cbla or currency
are at the sender's risk.
EASTERN BUSINESS OFFICE.
The S. a Beckvrith Special Ajrency New
York, rooms 43-50 Tribune building. Chi
cago, rooms 510-512 Tribune building.
KEPT ON SALE.
Chicago Auditorium Annex. Postolnce
News Co.. ITS Dearborn street.
Dallas, Tex. Globe News Depot. SCO Main
street
6aa Antonio, Tex. Louis Book and Clear
Co.. 521 East Houston street.
Denver Julius Black, Hamilton & Kend
rlck, 806-012 Seventeenth street; Pratt Book
Store, 1214 Fifteenth street.
Colorado Springs. Colo. Howard H. Bell.
Des Moines. lav-Moaea Jacobs. 300 Fifth
street.
Goldfleld, Xev. F. Sandstrom; Guy Marsh.
Kansas City, 31o Klcksecker Clear Co..
Ninth and "Walnut.
Log Angeles Harry Drapkln: B. E. Amos.
C14 West Seventh street: Dlllard News Co.
Minneapolis M. J. Kavanaueh. 30 South
Third.
Cleveland, OJames Pushaw, 80 Superior
ttreet. i
New York Clty-L. Jones & Co.. Aator
House.
AUantlo City, N. J. Ell Taylor, 207 North
Illinois ave.
Oakland, CaL W. H. Johnston. Fourteenth
and Franklin streets.
Ogden F. R. Godard and Meyers & Har
top, D L. Boyle.
Oinana Bnrkalow Bros.. 1612 Farnam;
Mageath Statlontry Co.. 130S Farnam; 246
South 14th.
Sacramento. CaL Sacramento News Co.,
420 K street.
Salt Lake Salt Lake News Co.. 77 West
Second street South; National News Agency.
Yellowstone Park, Wyo. Canyon Hotel,
Lake Hotel, Yellowstone Park Assn.
Long Beach B. E. Amos.
San Francisco J. K. Cooper & Co., 740
Market street; Goldsmith Bros., 226 Sutter
and Hotel St. Francis News Stand;
L. E. Lee. Palace Hotel News Stand; F. "V.
Pitts. 1008 Market: Frank Scott. SO Ellis; N.
Wheatley Movable News Stand, corner Mar
ket and Kearney streets; Foster & Orear,
Ferry News Stand.
St. Louis. Mo. E. T. Jett Book & News
Company. 808 Olive street.
Washington, D. C Ebbltt House, Pennsyl
vanla avenue. N
PORTLAND, TUESDAY, AUGUST 29, 1D05.
JAPAN CONSIDERS.
It was pointed out by The Oregonian
at the beginning of the peace confer
ence that Japan was in no position to
demand indemnity for her expenses In
the war with Russia, because she was
not in position to exact It. Her posi
tion of masters is not at all comparable
with that which existed when Napo
leon forced Prussia to pay $200,000,000
In 1S06-7, nor when Germany forced
France to pay 51,000,000,000 In 1870-71.
Japan has managed her affairs with
. wonderful keenness and intelligence
throughout except in this particular
matter of demanding heavy money In
demnity. She appears at a disadvan
tage here. She might Insist that Rus
sia should surrender Vladivostok, for
she has apparent means of enforcing
this demand. But she has no means
of forcing Russia to pay her an indem
nity, large or small. The reason is,
she can't strike Russia in any vital
part.
Since Japan, therefore, has put for
ward a claim which she knows she has
no power to enforce, she halts know
ing, apparently, that she ought not to
put up the lives of her soldiers upon a
demand for money that she never will
get, even if she should destroy Llnie
vltch's farms' and take Vladivostok.
Moreover, renewal of the war would
tax Japan's resources to the uttermost,
and might exhaust them. These and
similar considerations evidently have
moved Japan to ask continuation of the
conference. She has gained more al
ready than the world expected, or ex
pected herself, when she began the war.
THE RATE OF TAXATION.
It is understood that the assessed
values of Multnomah County this year
will be advanced to J150.000.000. That
should reduce the tax rate from $40, as
heretofore, to 515, or less, upon the
thousand dollars. Under the new law, as
to state taxes, the new system will not
Increase Multnomah's proportion; for
state taxes are not now levied on the
basis of assessed values, which differ
greatly in the several counties, but on
other principles.
The total sum to be raised by taxa
tion in Multnomah County, under the
nfw and advanced assessment, should
not be greatly more than formerly.
The danger Is that the much larger
total valuation and apparently smaller
tax rate will induce extravagance and
excess. In various ways. But the sev
eral departments of our local govern
ment, in whose hands the power to
make the rates is lodged, ought to be
able to check or restrain the tendency
In this direction.
In Massachusetts, property is as
sessed or valued for taxation at close
approximation to its actual values. In
Boston, therefore, the rate Is about 515
per thousand. In other cities of Mas
sachusetts the rate runs from 514 to
520. In Pennsylvania and Illinois a dif
ferent method has prevailed. Hitherto
the total valuation of property for tax
ation has been much less in Philadel
phia and in Chicago than in Boston
though Philadelphia has twice the pop
ulation, and Chicago more than three
times the population, of Boston.
Of course the tax rate, in itself, is
never the true measure of taxation.
Many other facts are to be considered.
There are poll tax and occupation tax,
liquor and other license fees, and so on;
and above all, variations In the system
of valuation; so that the tax rate of one
city or locality cannot well be compared
with that of another.
If our tax rate can be kept down to
about 515 per thousand there will be no
occasion to complain of the advance
ment of values on the Assessors rolls.
But more and more it will be necessary
to scrutinize all expenditures, that ex
travagance or excess which largely in-
creased valuations might seem to in
vite, may be met at all points. To
many it will appear so easy to get all
that everybody wants by adding an
other mill or two to the tax rate. But
let us keep' it In mind that, following
Hest examples, we ought not to go
above 515 on a thousand upon a very
full valuation. This to Include the
state tax, for which provision is now
made through a somewhat subtle and
rather indirect method, which may be
misleading and illusive, if not carefully
and closely observed.
STARVING OUT NOR5IAI. SCHOOLS.
Weston's Normal School Is starved
out for want of pap from the state,
and now the taxpayers of that town
face the necessity of establishing a
local high school with their own
money. Weston's high school hitherto
has been a normal school, which the
taxpayers of all Oregon have support
ed. The state has been doing the same
for the towns of Monmouth, Drain and
Ashland, but the Institutions at those
places have not succumbed, because
sustained by the promise that the Leg
islature will pay their debts.
The Weston Leader has called the
attention of the citizens of that town
to the fact that the demise of the State
Normal School leaves the youth without
a high school. It says:
Now that the Normal School has been closed
at Weston, the necessity of maintaining a
larger and better public school appeals t alL
A meeting: wfl be held at the asboelhouse Sep
tember 2 at 2 P. M. to decide "whether
grades above the eighth grade shall be taught
In District No. 10," and will without doubt
be lareely attended.
TS fit n . ...Ml. will V.
largely Increased. The Normal can n knger -
care ror training school pupils, or carry
eighth-grade graduates forward on their edu
cational path. It would appear that the least
that can be done to make the school efficient
la to add two more grades and two more
teachers. The present teaching force consists
of Principal D. L. Gubser and three assist
ants the Misses NelHe M. Stevens. Luctla B.
Cralgen and Anlce Barnes.
Thus the taxpayers, of Weston are
confronted with the necessity of "main
taining a larger and better public
school" and with the question "whether
grades above the eighth grade shall be
taught In district No. 19." It will be
seen that the State Normal School has
been educating the sons and the daugh
ters of Weston citizens in high school
rudiments at the expense of the whole
state. Could there be better evidence
of the big normal school graft in Ore
gon, the graft that has thrived not
only at Weston, but also at Monmouth,
Drain and Ashland, and which would
have spread to other towns had not the
Legislature been restrained by public
clamor? The grafters would not allow
the normal school appropriations to
be made alone on their merits,
but yoked them up with appropriations
for the Insane Asylum, the Peniten
tiary and the Reform School, expecting
that the latter institutions would carry
along the sucker normals. But the peo
ple called a referendum on the graft
and next will pick it apart with the
Initiative. Continuing, the Leader says:
Wee ton has suffered severely from the edu
cational crime remitting In the low of the
Normal an unexpected blow that has fallen
at the brightest period In. all Its history. axxN
which is alike unjust to the deceived teacher,
to the students and to Eastern Oregon but
must beetlr Itself to sustain Its reputation as
a good school town. Nearly every one Is
agreed upon this point, but the question of
ways and means is as yet undecided. This
will be discussed at the school meeting Sep
tfraber 2 and at a special meeting of the Com
mercial Association next Monday evening.
If normals Jn one or two other townB
shall be starved out, those towns will
have to "bestir" themselves the same
way. What Oregon needs is one nor
mal school for the Estate, and It could be
economically maintained in connection
with the State University.
FRATERNAL INSURANCE ORDERS.
The Supreme Council of the Royal
Arcanum, one of the old and strong
fraternal insurance orders of the
United States, meets this week in Ohio.
The meeting is Important because that
Nemesis, which relentlessly pursues the
friendly orders, has thrust upon the
council the old, inevitable riddle: How
to meet a growing annual death rate
per. thousand due to the Increasing av
erage age of the membership. Sooner
or later this question confronts every
co-operative Insurance society, and
upon its solution depends either con
tinued prosperity or schism. How real
the problem is to. the older orders may
be gained from one or two facts.
For thirty societies the average death
rate per thousand rose from 4.10 In the
third year of their existence to 9.5 in the
fifteenth year. That Is, It doubled and
more. Nor is their history in the least
singular. The case Is the 6ame, in a
degree not much greater or less, with
all the friendly orders. Time neces
sarily explodes for all of thorn the fal
lacy that enough new and young mem
bers can be obtained to hold the death
rate down to a constant figure. This
cannot be done. It may for a few years.
The rate may even be lowered, tempor
arily. But ultimately a time comes
when the ratio of new members to the
total membership begins to decrease;
the death rate then begins to rise, and
nothing can prevent It From that mo
ment the annual payments of the mem
bers must become heavier and heavier
unless they have been originally com
puted to include a sufficient reserve.
Another fact is not without Import
ance In this connection. The average
running expenses per capita show a de
cided tendency to increase with the
age of the orders. For twenty-seven
leading ones this average mounted in
the course of fifteen years from $1.48
to 5L65 over 11 per cent. The result
of the doubly increasing burden natur
ally Is that young men turn to newly
established societies for their Insurance,
while often, though by no means al
ways, the membership of the older ones
actually declines. Two cases may illus
trate this: The first began with a death
rate of 12.5. The' number of members
increased up to a maximum, but with
a steadily increasing death rate. And
the death rate went on Increasing till
it reached 33.9 per thousand, while in
the meantime the membership had
fallen to one-half what It was when the
tabulation began. The other case was
similar; a growing membership, then a
decline, but a constantly Increasing
death rate from 13.7 to 22.2.
Troubles of this sort among the fra
ternal orders arise from" their paying
too little attention to the mathematics
of Insurance. But experience is teach
ing them better, just as It did the old
line companies. There Is record of 822
old line companies organized. Of these,
775 have disappeared. The annals of
faternal insurance present no such dis
astrous tale; but, on the. other hand,
their history Is briefer. The Oddfellows,
the largest secret order in America, has
existed here eighty-five years; the
Druids, seventy years; but these are not
Insurance societies.
It was in 1868 that these latter orig
inated In this country, with the Work
men at Meadvllle, Pa. From that year
to 1880 there is recorded the failure of
sixty-four old line companies and the
organization of twenty-jiine assess
ment 'societies. Insurance based on
mortality tables seemed & monstrous
miscarriage. The people sought some
thing safer, cheaper and easier to un
derstand. The mutual assessment plan
appealed to the plain common sense of
the masses as offering exactly what
they needed. Between 1S80 nnd 1S$0 the
Modern Woodmen, the B'nal B'rlth and
thirty-four other societies were organ
ized. The next decade saw seventy
four, and today there are probably not
far from 300 offering Insurance on the
co-operative plan, and certajnly at least
100 with fair success. Some of them
have solved the problem of the Increas
ing death rate; the Royal Arcanum is
still struggling with It
There Is really but one possible solu
tion, and that is to Increase the cost of
insurance to every member as his ex
pectation of life decreases. Two ways
have been found of -doing" this, one
much better than the other. The step
rate method, as It Is called. Increases
the member's assessment each year, or
each five years, or by some other step.
It is scientific enough, but as a business
policy it has defects. For one thlng.,a
man's power to pay is likely to diminish
as he grows old. Under the step-rate
system his burden becomes heavier as
his strength diminishes. Long life is
penalized. The direct effect Is to force
numerous lapses and to force them at
a time of life when reinsurance else
where has become out of the question.
More than that, the prospect of paying
- lnore and more-each year for their in-
surance does not attract young mem
bers, who see policy-holders In old-line
companies obtaining substantial annual
reductions of their premiums, as thy
grow older, from dividends.
The other and better method for the
fraternal orders is to fix a "level rate"
which shall overpay while a man Is
young, but only enough to balance
what It underpays when he is old. Such
a rate builds up a reserve fund In the
order and places It on a basis just as
secure as that of the old-line compa
nies, while It Is free from the discour
aging, or even cruel, features of the
step-rate.
SPECULATIVE THEOLOGY.
It Is not recorded in Holy Writ that
the founder of Christianity ever ran a
restaurant One would think, therefore,
that the conclusions of .Bro. A. N. Nor
ton, of Marion, Ind., about His way of
doing It, must be largely speculative.
Still, the Lord never "ran" a news
paper, either, or a church, each of which
Is vastly more trying to "the soul than a
restaurant; and yet the Rev. Mr. Shel
don has accurately discovered how Je
sus would do both. Possibly Mr. Nor
ton had access Xo the same sources of
knowledge as Mr. Sheldon. Possibly
his conclusion that the Lord would use
a complete outfit of tin dishes In run
ning a restaurant was based on some
thing far more deeply interfused than
mere guesswork. Mr. Norton may have
communed with that being "whose
dwelling Is the light of setting suns."
Perhaps he had a vision. In the crim
son splendor of the sunset of a res
taurant such as awaits the faithful In
the New Jerusalem, whose tables were
all set with shining tin plates and tin
coffee cups. Not as through a glass
darkly, but face to face, he gazed upon
the radiant vision.
Or mayhap it was revealed to him
as the law of meat-eating was to Pe
ter. A sheet came down upon his bed
in the night laden with tin spoons,
tin milk pitchers and tin sugar bowls,
and he heard a voice from heaven
saying, 'Make a regular tintinnabula
tion of It, Brother Norton." And dl
vinely harmonious was the clatter
thereof when they dined. But the
Wesleyan preachers were not satisfied.
"We have somewhat against thee.
Brother Norton," they grumbled In sa
cred phrase. "One thing thou lackest
If Jesus were running this restaurant
and running It for a crowd of preach
ers, he would set out fried chicken
three times a day."
But Mr. Norton thought not He was
trusting to his guests' consciences for
his pay, and his guests were preach
ers. Moreover, chicken was dear.
Under the circumstances, he contend
ed, Jesus would have served codfish
and dried apple pie.. Conducive as
those viands are to chaste penslveness,
the members of the Wesleyan confer
ence at Falrvlew would none of them.
They shook the dust off their feet at
Mr. Norton's door 'and receded to the
fleshpots of the hotel.
Thuir disheartenlngly ends another
great effort for the evangelization of
the world. But Mr. Norton should not
despair. His work Is not lost He has
taught us Just how Jesus would run a
restaurant "Set the tables with tin
ware," so goes the lofty precept "and
serve no fried chicken." In the current
discourses of many, of our evangelists
there fs much doctrine more preten
tious than Sir. Norton's; does It come
any nearer to the teaching of the Mas
ter? And we have a lot of discourses like
those of Mr. Norton' from- pulpits of
Portland.
MOUNTAIN PASSES OF OREGON.
The map of Oregon defines the possi
bilities for railroads in the state. In
many states railroad-builders can lay
their lines at will, emulating the Czar
of Russia, who, being consulted on
proposed routes between St Petersburg
and Moscow, laid a ruler on the map,
drew a straight line from one city to
the other, and said, "There let it be."
A simple plan. Indeed, and possible
across Russian plains and steppes.
Nature has marked for Oregon, where
railroads can. or should, go. If man
desires to deviate from .her routes, or
overpass the obstacles Nature has set
the Inevitable penalties and payments
must be met
Everybody knows the division of the
state Into Eastern and Western Ore
gon by the Cascade Mountains. It is
not generally known how few and how
far apart the practicable passes are.
The O. R. & N. has taken the Colum
bia Valley for its path, thereby fring
ing the very edge and margin on the
north side of Oregon In order to use
the water level, or as near thereto as
the twists and turns of the shore pi the
great river will permit The passage of
the Cascades is thus effected along the
gorge which pierces the heart of the
range. Easy grades were gained so
long as It was found practicable to fol
low the river course.
But at Umatilla the turn southward
had to be made, across the Blue Moun
tains, and an elevation of 4200 feet had
to be surmounted before reaching
Huntington, 2395 feet above sea level.
Such figures tell the tale of difficulties
met In laying out the line, and of draw
backs and cost In operation both for
passengers and freight
Turning southwards along the Cas
cade Range, no other pass possible for
railroad building appears' to have been
found, until, eighty miles south of Port
land, what is called the Mlnto Pass was
examined. The North Santlam River
led the engineers Into the heart of the
Cascades, and a grade eighty miles
long, and not exceeding 2 feet per
cent was discovered. The highest
point of 4400 feet or thereabouts, was
led up to by a steady, gradual ascent
The curvature was moderate, and no
need for tunnels, and slight use for
snowsheds, was found. Along this
route, the old Oregon 'Pacific, now
known as the Corvallls & Eastern, has
been constructed to a point well within
the mountains, and In measurable dis
tance of the summit The advantages
claimed for this pass, besides those al
ready mentioned, are its accessibility
from the eastern side of the range, In
which direction a grade.of 1M per cent
with very light curvature. Is shown on
the maps of the line.
Albany, In Linn County, eighty-eight
miles south of Portland, Is the starting
point at present for this road. Forty
miles south again stands Eugene, at
the head of the Willamette Valley, and
near where the McKenzie and the mid
dle and coast forksf the Willamette
Join their waters. The valley of the
McKenzie was carefully examined
many years ago. The lower course of
the river was quite Inviting for many
miles. But the higher the engineers got
the more broken the country became,
until they were brought face to face
with difficulties prohibitive to railroad
building.
But the middle fork of the Willamette
offered another chance. The routes
north of this led the surveyors out into
Eastern Oregon either north or south
of the snowclad Three Sisters. By one
or other of the streams forming the
headwaters of the middle fork. It Is
thought that a way out. In the neigh
borhood of Odell or Crescent Lake, may
strike the headwaters of the Deschutes
River and so reach the easy slopes
leading out on to the plain country of
Eastern Oregon. It Is often stated,
also, that by a tunnel a considerable
saving of elevation may be gained, -and
that this route may so be set on equal
terms with that of the Mlnto Pass
above described.
To settle this question and to deter
mine the practicability of this pass Is
probably the function of the engineer
ing party whose departure from Eu
gene was referred to In yesterday's
dispatches. For, south of the pass in
question, none other has yet been heard
of In railroad circles for joining West
ern with Eastern Oregon.
The Southern Pacific winds Its devi
ous way southward from Oregon over a
route truly called "scenic," but more
inviting to the traveler in search of
scenery than to the lover of easy
grades and straight railroads. Prob
lems without end have been met In the
effort to straighten and Improve, and
still the maximum of 200 tons Is un
derstood to be the best . that a very
powerful engine can haul over the Sls
klyous. If the railroad .development of Ore
gon Is to proceed, as It most surely
will. In the connection of the great
east and west divisions of the state, it
seems that Nature has very plalnly
and decisively marked out the way.
Count Romanones, the Spanish Minis
ter of Agriculture, has journeyed from
end to end of Andalusia and through
out that historic land has found noth
ing but desolation and starvation. Peo
ple are dying for want of the plainest
and most Inexpensive necessaries of
life, and yet the coffers of poor, old.
degenerate Spain are made to yield up
liberal sums In order that the profligate
young King shall not misstep or lag
In the primrose path. Much of the suf
fering In Andalusia is undoubtedly due
to a protracted spell of unfavorable cli
matic conditions, but the money that is
wasted by the aristocracy of Spain In
keeping up an opera-bouffe form of re
gal government would, if properly
spent save many lives.
In the flndlncs relative to the Ben
nington disaster, there is directness
that provokes admiration. We know
now with absolute clearness what
caused the boiler to exolode, and the
blame has been fixed. It will be -no
little relief to. the country to learn that
the Benhlncton's boilers, after fourteen
years' service, were not In bad condi
tion. If examination of other war ves
sels, ordered bv Secretary Bonaparte,
shall reveal like soundness, this feel
ing of relief will be accentuated.
San Francisco friends of Alexander
McLean, who Is cruising around the
North Pacific sealing preserves on a
poaching expedition, are said to be fit
ting out an expedition to warn him of
his danger of arrest in case he comes
back to the California port Unless the
warning expedition has better success
In catching this pirate bold than has
ever been scored by the revenue cut
ters which have tackled the work, they
might as well remain at home.
If Captain Spencer succeeds In ar
ranging a race meeting between his
boat and Captain Scott's Telegraph, it
Is to be hoped that there will be a
clause In the articles prohibiting pool
selling on the result Spencer has made
a hard fight for law and order, and the
abolition of gambling on horse races,
and It would be painful if some sinful
speculator should take advantage of the
occasion and wager a few kopeks on
his steamboat race. '
There was an error In the statement
of yellow fever mortality at New Or
leans. In a recent news report. It was
reported that the proportion was only
eight In one thousand, among those
taken with the malady. The actual
proportion, during the present visita
tion. Is one In eight It has been high
er heretofore.
It is painful to observe that Captain
E. W. Spencer, who broke up the horse
races because betting on the speed of
horses Is so sinful, now offers to bet
that he has a steamboat that can beat
another man's steamboat Captain
Spencer reminds us of another lot of re
formers, now much in evidence in the
city government
A Portsmouth dispatch says that the
peace conference has reached a stage
where it Is kept alive by the use of
oxygen. Hot air seldom masquerades
under such a dignified name.
When Russia asks Japan how the
Mikado Is going to collect Indemnity,
Japan might ask how the Czar Is going
to recapture Sakhalin.
If Uncle Sam Is surprised at graft
In the Bremerton Navy-yard, he should
remember the proximity of that place
to Seattle.
Dr. Draper followed In His steps to
speak to the publicans and .sinners of
the Sunday Trail, but Dr. Sheldon
didn't
0REG0N0Z0NE.
I don't know but It seems to me
Wealth and religion don't quite gee;
That Is, wealth in stacks and oodles.
That runs to automobiles and poodles.
And the good old-fashioned creed
That helps God's children when In need;
Seems to me that they don't gee:
Seems that way,
I say. '
Exposition Personals, t
Miss Wealthy Douglas has returned
from her vacation at the Lewis and Clark
Exposition, at Porttand. Ogden City
(Utah) Examiner.
Mr. and Mrs. Fate Humble, of Corvallls,
returned Monday evening from a visit to
the Portland Fair. Stevensvlllo (Mont.)
Register.
Mrs. Glen Falrley returned from the
Portland Fair Friday. Mr. Falrley will
leave here for the Fair about tho first of
next month, at which time a great many
Peckltes will go. Peck (Idaho) Press.
Robert Lemons, wife and daughter, will
leave Sunday afternoon for Portland, Or.,
to .attend tho Fair. Carrollton (Mo.)
Democrat "
The New Viceroy.
How I envy the Earl of Mlnto!
(Though I reckon it Is a sin to).
'TIs a fine large Job
For a big nabob
That he seems to have gotten Into.
Undoubtedly the oldest living American
is the Baltimore American, which has
Just celebrated its 132d birthday.
George Washington, colored, known as
the Father of Centralla. Wash., Is dead.
He was not related to the Father of .His
Country.
"3funkers Murmurs."
If you want a proposition that will chase
away the blues.
Just peruse the "Munkers Murmurs" In
the Santlam News.
Ofy this Munkers murmurlna Is a corre
spondent up
To the date In each particular he surely
fills the cup.
As an artist df the average he's bound to
carve his name.
And become a grinning gargoyle on the
Parthenon of Fame.
Now he writes of Jimmy Jenkins, who,
enamored of a pearl.
In his brightest bib and tucker, goes to
"Sunday with his girl,"
But, alas, alack for Jimmy! 'twixt tho
lovor and the lip
That he fain would suck the sweetness of,
there's many a woful slip;
For, upon the way from Munkers, Jimmy
falls Into a bog.
And "he reached his destination very
much upon the hog!"
Because her husband grated his molars,
a Tacoma woman bogged the police judge
to "punish him as far as the law goes."
In doscriblng the woman a reporter says
"her Hps close with a snap." Is .there
any law In the State of Washington that
will go so far as to punish a man whose
wife's Hp3 close with a snap, merely
becauso he grates his molars? It looks
to be an even break.
Tho New York American tells us that
the first corset, which was Invented by
Catherine de Medici, was called a
"corps." Possibly the final "e" was
omitted becauso It was too suggestive.
A recent Issue of a Sun Francisco news
paper contained this advertisement: "Will
exchange first-class piano for tombstone."
The advertiser evidently wants an Instru
ment that won't make a noise.
Refreshments.
There Is a lovely little line
On Invitations some of them
That makes our optics beam and shine,
Each one ay very diadem;
In script so cutely cut and curved.
It reads: "Refreshments will be served."
I rather think we would not go
To sundry functions, were it not
For that refreshment hint Ifor, ob.
It touches quite a tender spot!
Our prosecco may not be deserved.
And yet "Refreshments will be served."
Parties, receptions and tho sort.
Not all entice us with their charm,
Of sociability; in short.
We view them with profound alarm;
And yet to dare them we are nerved
By this: "Refreshments will be served."
ROBERTUS LOVE.
SPOKANE TO THEST0RM CELLAR
Belllngham Reveille.
Not a peep nor a chirrup do wo hear
these days from Spokane ancnt tho ne
cessity of a railroad commission for the
adjustment of traffic rates for the espe
cial benefit of the shippers of that politi
cal crankdom.
It must have tickled the ho&rt cockles
of tho state railroad commissioners, and
especially excited the risibilities of the
Hon. Harry Falrchlld. who has been the
object of so much unmerited suspicion
and abuse, to have witnessed the scamp
ering to cover of the, greatly aggrieved
merchants of the Falls City, when the
board recently appeared there to hold
public cessions.
To the Invitation that the dolefully ad
vertised grievances of this dreadfully
railroad-ridden town be placed before the
state commission for settlement not a
complaint showed up.
Even the Spokesman-Review refrained
from filing a protest against the rate on
paper.
Whero was the tempestuous Jake
Schiller, the rampant Mr. Crane, and
their long train of Republican secession
ists, who swore eternal destruction to the
party unless they were given the very
opportunity from which they fled In ter
ror to the storm cellars of Spokane
prairie?
What a lovely lot of humbugs these
Spokane reformers are. Coma to find
out they discover themselves to have
been especially favored by rates as
against the surrounding communities
whoso little merchants they would like
to swallow in one gobfull.
Unless we are greatly mistaken In our
calculation, Spokane Just now would pre
fer to have no railroad commission at all.
Connecticut Farmers Scared.
Minneapolis Journal.
That Connecticut legislature which has
bought 978 fountain pens- and 2."6S2 knives
for Its 290 members at a cost estimated
at more than 515.0CO also passed a string
ent law against "corrupt practices." If
this legislature plcknlcked anywhere, the
Connecticut farmers were doubtless
shrewd enough to lock their chicken
coops,
Respects to Mr. Stubbs.
Bend Bulletin.
Mr. Stubbs made a trip over the Colum
bia Southern Railroad with his special
train last Tuesday. That was, of course,
for fun. But the fact, that Central Ore
gon Is strong enough to stand up and
look the railroad hog In the eye and
tell him we are growing tired of waiting.
Is having Its effect
AN OPINIONjOF THE FAIR.
Cle-Elum (Washington) Echo.
The Lewis and Clark Exposition 13 now
In the zenith of Its glory. Thousands
of people from all part3 of the United
States, Canada and even foreign shores
are now in or enroute to the Pacific
Northwest, ostensibly to see the Exposi
tion, yet more desirous of seeing this,
the most wonderful part of Uncle Sam's
domain, and every one of them are more
than pleased that they are now making
or have completed the trip and have
seen and now know that the half has
not been told about the resources, possi
bilities, climate and opportunities of the
great Northwest
Never before has such an opportunity
been afforded for visiting the Pacific
Coast states, and the fact that all trans
continental railroads are crowded to their
utmost capacity is sufficient proof that
everyone able to spare the time and
money I3 taking advantage of It. The
benefit to the states west of the Rocky
mountains cannot be estimated. Thous
ands will return to the state of their
nativity, dispose of their holdings and
find a home in this comparatively new
country, realizing that the stories they
have heard,-heretofore believed by them
to be greatly exaggerated, were short of
the whole truth.
But we started to tell our readers
acquainted with the country,-about the
Fair. Take our advice, and even if you
have to discount the future take a week
off and see what you will never have
another opportunity to enjoy right at
your very door. We have had the pleas
ure of visiting two of the greatest, ex
positions given In the United States, and
while both were on a much larger scale,
in fact too large to allow a person of
moderate means and limited time to prop
erly take them In, neither excelled the
Lewis and Clark Exposition in anything
but area. Compact and complete, with
sufficient ground to properly and con
veniently display everything worthy of
a place and attention, adequately des
cribes this Fair. There Is room for every
thing and everybody without crowding,
while the arrangement is such as to en
able a satisfactory inspection to be made
within a reasonable, time. ,
It Is most gratifying to say that the
good people of Portland are not taking
advantage of the opportunities afforded
to "graft" and "hold-up" everybody, as
has been too often the case at great ex
positions. Hotel rates, private rooms,
meals at restaurants or with private
families are as reasonable as before the
Imposition opened Its doors. In fact, so
far as the cost of necessities Is con
cerned, one would hardly realize a great
exposition is in full blast, and thousands
of strangers are within the gates and the
guests of Portland. And Portland people
can well be proud of this condition of
affairs. The future will show their
wisdom and bring a reward far In
excess -of what would follow had a policy
of "get-rich-quick" been adopted by them.
As we look at It. no citizen of this
state can afford to miss a visit, if but
for two or three days, while parents of
children old enough to appreciate the
wonders to be seen can do more to de
velop and educate them than will be
possible in years In the dally walks of
life.
While possibly all of our readers have
read more or less pertaining to the Ex
position and the exhibits of the creations
of man to be seen there, but a faint
Idea can be gathered compared to seeing.
People In every walk of life will find
many things they thought they were
familiar with developed far beyond all
expectations. Rest, recreation, joy and
education are all here- and to be had
at such a small cost of time and money
that none can afford to allow the oppor
tunity to pass. Take our advice, see this
great Exposition, and you will congratu
late yourself, as well as reap direct and
Indirect "benefits.
Woman Farmer's Thrift.
Echo News.
Miss Sadie Copplnger, a splendid speci
men of true womanhood, and a resident
of the Echo country, has demonstrated a
womans' ability to successfully conduct a
farm. Miss Sadie has a homestead about
five miles east of Echo. She has farmed
the land for two years, getting a good
crop each year, and this year she tells us
that she Is one of the flraHo finish up
her farm work, deliver her crop to the
warehouse and get her receipts for same.
Two thousand for a barley crop, clear
money and deposited In the bank. Is the
proud record of this typical Umatilla
County girl, a result which should be a
shining example to the many young la
dles who are above the farm, but who
will probably go to Sadie to make a bor
row later on when they get acquainted
with the man they marry, while Sadie
will attend the Fair.
Changing Conditions.
Chicago. Record-Herald.
The growth of New York City has
changed the character of the lower sec
tions very materially In the last few
years. It will surprise most people to
hear from a police magistrate In Harlem
that the triangular section bounded by
Third avenue. One Hundred and Twenty
fifth street and the Harlem River is now
the worst section of New York- He said
this the other day, in view of the great
prevalence of crime that came before him.
The population there Includes blacks and
whites, and Italy. China. Greece and
other countries are represented by their
worst elements. The Bowery and Five
Points were models of deportment In com
parison with this Harlem slum territory.
. Hunters License "Idiotic."
Port Orford Tribune.
It Is said that the Deputy Game Warden
and assistant were camped at Port Or
ford last Sunday, and departed on down
the coast next day. Our people look upon
the dollar 'license Taw as a piece of Idi
otic, unconstitutional infamy, which they
feel Justified In evading, but it will be
better to obey the law for the time being,
and agitate for- its repeal by the next
Legislature. Don't vote for any man who
will uphold the law, for any position, and
you will thus help the agitation.
Unreliable.
Kansas City Times.
"Martha," said a Westport woman to
her negro cook, "when are you and Abe
going to be married?"
"Doan' know es Ah'll mahry dat man,"
replied the cook.
"What's the matter now?" she was
asked.
"Well, ma'am," the cook said, shaking
her head. "Ah hear Ab been runnln
'round wif enuthah woman. Ah's fulL ob
susplcioslty 'bout dat man."
Missouri Hazel in Oregon.
Aurora Borealls.
John Bertschlnger brought Into our
office Thursday several branches of a
hazel bush which originally came from
Missouri. It was planted- by the
Schwader boys years ago and seems
to thrive well In this clime. It is
loaded down with large bunches con
taining five and six nuts each. The
nuts do not ripen as early here as back
East, and will probably not be fully
ripe until October.
Omissions of History.
Chicago Tribune.
Lord Cornwallls had surrendered.
"I decided it was the best thing to do,"
he explained to the reporters. "It's a
great deal cheaper all around than it
would be for the two countries to hold a
peace conference. Think of the cablo
tolls!"
Besides, as he reflected afterward. It
didn't bind King Georgo to the payment
of an indemnity.
BRYAN IN THEPHILIPPINES.
Says the New York Tribune:
Hr. Bryan will take In the Philippines on
his trip around the world. What a pity he
could not have been a member of Secretary
Tart's Congressional party, and thus hava
been able to enjoy tho Hon. Beurke Coek
raa's speech in Manila, and perhaps make
one himself.
Mr. Bryan will speak later, and his re
marks will lose nothing of Interest by the
delay. When he arrives In Manila tho
news of his presence will quickly spread,
and the desire to see and hear him there
and elsewhere will be very strong. Here,
the people will be told. Is the man who,
as candidate for President, stood In 1S0O
for the early Independence of the archi
pelago, who again advocated It last year
In his canvass for Judge Parker, and
who may be the Democratic candidate for
President for the third time In 1303. It
requires no urging to Induce Mr. Bryan
to take the platform, and it must be said
In his favor that whenever he does It ho
speaks his mind with frankness. How
ever lacking he may be In wisdom, he Is
not lacking In courage or sincerity.
But It will be a ticklish situation for
him. Suppose he addresses meetings at
Manila and other cities in the Islands
proclaiming the views with respect to
our presence there and the meaning of
It that he hag freely proclaimed in this
country. Suppose the effect of his utter
ances is to hearten every anti-American
agitator In the archipelago, and induce
them all to get busy again. Suppose
American difficulties with the malcon
tents Increase, and are traceable to Mr.
Bryan's perfervid talk about buying peo
ple at so much a head, and governing
them, not only without their consent but
against their wishes. That Is the line of
Mr. Bryan's talk here at home, and it
does no harm. In the Philippines It might
prove a very grave matter.
Bourke Cockran at Manila cut a char
acteristic caper. He throws flipflaps like
a professional. But Mr. Bryan is of a
different mold. He doe3 not recant. He
is dead in earnest, and goes all rhetorical
and other lengths In support of his opin
ions. He will have to be interpreted to
the rank and file of the Filipinos, but
his deliverances will lose nothing In tho
translation Into Spanish. His visit to the
Philippines Is going to be as interesting
to us here at home as to him. It contains
the possibilities of a "breeze."
RUSSIA BEATENNOT CONQUERED
Chicago Chronicle.
Leaving the refinements of diplomacy to
one side. It will be interesting to see
whether, in thl3 day and generation of
advanced civilization and human! tarian
ism. the Japanese Empire will deliberate
ly place Itself In the attitude of making
war not for principle but for money.
Simmered down to an elementary prop
osition, that Is the question Involved in
the existing deadlock In tho peace negoti
ations. Japan can have peace not only with
honor but with glory. If she says the
word. If she does not say the word It will
be because she elects to make merchan
dise of the flesh and blood of her soldiers
by continuing a war the object of which
is money. No refinement of casuistry will
serve to avoid this fact.
It cannot be emphasized too strongly
that Japan has not conquered Russia. To
pay tribute to Japan, therefore, would be
a superfluous and Incredible solf-abase-ment
which no nation could endure and
retain a shred of the world's considera
tion. Japan has gained, either in, the field or
at Portsmouth, everything for which she
went to war and other things which sha
did not claim when the war began. It
must be evident therefore, that any fur
ther demands are simply the outgrowth
of greed, fathered by tho Idea that the
object of war is not to obtain justice but
to extort tribute.
Japan may as well understand that this
doctrine, no matter how popular It may
be among Asiatics, is no longer accepted
by the Caucasian races of the world. Tho
threat to renew hostilities unless Russia
pays blood money Is a menace similar to
these employed by the robber burons of
the Middle Ages. It is not In accord with
tho sentiment of the twentieth century
It is time for victorious Nippon to take
account of these matters. Nothing can
be more certain than the fact that a re
newal of the war spells exhaustion and
disaster to Japan no less than to Russia.
Railroad Promise Brings Joy.
Wedderburn Radium.
The news that it was definitely de
termined to begin the construction of
the railroad from Drain to Coos Bay
was received here with enthusiasm.
Like the children of Israel, we have
been waiting years for a Moses to take
us out of the wilderness, and the sooner
the railroad comes moseying along, the
happier we will be. We will be thank
ful to have it come as far as Coos, even
if further construction Is delayed;
but we feel assured that with a lino
reaching Humboldt Bay on the south,
and another at Coos on the north, that
It will not be many years before they
come together.
Farm Man-els In Wallowa.
Enterprise Chieftain.
Solomon Face was exhibiting a bundle
of oats here Tuesday morning which grew
on his place adjoining town and which
were seven feet high. Mr. Pace says that
he Ijas ten acres of the same quality of
oats and that the bundle Is a fair sample
of the entire crop. He also has some very
fine timothy this year, the heads of which
average over eight inches in length, and
many are eleven Inches long by actual
measurement.
An Awful Finish.
Detroit Free Press.
Hen What makes you look so glum?
Rooster I'vo Just been chased out of
the woodshed with a feather duster. It
got so close to me that I recognized tho
tails of three of my family.
A Deep Problem.
Kansas City Journal.
This was tttken from the question box
in the juvenile Sunday-school class at
Erie a few Sundays ago:
"Dear God: What made ye put tails
on kats fer?"
Heard at the Beach.
Exchange.
New Arrival What a lot of loving cou
pies there are here.
Old Guest Yes; the husbands don't get
down except over Sunday.
No Use or Kicking.
Washington Star.
What's the use or klckln
When the air Is soft an warm.
An' the sky Is blue above you
Without a hint o storm?
When the waves are softly slngln?
As they sparkle In the light;
What's the use of klckln'
'Cause the flsh '
don't
bite.
The fun of goln flshln'
Is to find a good excuse
To sit and watch the ripples
When the line Is hangln' loose.
To feel the breezes blowln
An' feel such calm delight
That you never think of klckln
'Cause the flsh
don't
bite.
There's many an ambition
Which Is but a fruitless quest.
But this world Is full of sunshine j
An' or beauty an of rest. t
' An' we've had the, fun of Hvlrir
Though we ain't successful quite,'
An there ain't no use of klckln'
'Cause the flsh
don't
bite.
f