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PORTLAND, THURSDAY, JAN. 12, 1901.
IA. MISTAKE THAT OTHERS HAVE MADE.
The distinguished Russian General
XStoessel) who said that the main cause
of the war between Russia and Japan
was ignorance in Russia of Japan's
power to fight, made undoubtedly a
correct statement This sort of thing
has happened before. "Plague on't,"
eald the knight in the play, "an' I
thought he had been so valiant and so
cunning in fence, I'd have seen him
damned ere I'd have challenged him!"
This sort of temerity has been the un
doing of -many an individual and the
discomfiture of many a nation.
It is apparent that. If the war Is to
continue, both Russia and Japan -will
now bend their main energies to sea
armament. Neither party Is likely to
gain any further great advantage on
land, for neither has a preponderant
force. Japan may force Russia back
further, but cannot destroy her armies.
On the other hand, it is not probable
that Russia can overcome in any de
cisive way the land forces of Japan.
But Japan now can win the war, by
tiring Rusisa out, if Russia cannot
meet her at sea. Therefore, if the war
is to go on, Russia must greatly in
crease her sea power; and Japan, in
order to be prepared for her antago
nist, must do the same.
, Both armies in Manchuria are so in
trenched, on lone lines, that a forward
movement of either, unless with a
greatly preponderant force, -vhlch
could be used for flank or turning
movements, seems to.be impracticable.
Two armies, of 600,000 men each, face
each other, and the lines of both have
been strengthened by every resource
knownto mlltiary science. It is not
now necessary for Japan to take the
offensive, as heretofore, for she has
gained Port Arthur and a sea base, and
has relieved herself of the peril that
always was great so- long as Port Ar
thur remained in Russian hands and
sheltered a powerful Russian fleet..
Japan now can wait, hold the Russian"
armies at bay and strengthen her navy.
But will Russia, having found to her
intense surprise that Japan can fight,
insist on -pursuing the struggle? She
gives it out that she has plans for aug
menting her navy, which It will require
two years to complete. But during
these two years what will Japan be
doing? Not a few judicious observers
think Japan has won the war already,
and that a disposition on the part of
Russia to concede It will soon appear.
The latest Is the suggestion that Russia
will make peace now and prepare a
!fleet for future conquest of Japan. But
Japan will be strengthening her naval
force, too. and when challenged again
may be as "cunning in fence" as be
fore. Ol!K PACIFIC COMMERCE.
Our trade with China is growing at a
rapid rate, and our exports to China
at a rate much more rapid than our
Imports from that empire. The follow
ing table, which exhibits the tendency
of our trade with China, is an interest
ing one:
Import into Kxports from
the V. S. from the V. S. to
China. China.
Jff .....$15.357.2.V. J4.40C.S64
168 16.545.2S7 2.S34.S:
1N 13.S4S.4SS 8.547.241
leBT
1KS
J 890
200 .
1901.....
1902
19U3
1904 ....
17.9H5,l2i 10.129.113
1 1.720.1587 ltl,587.G6G
19.624.3SU 12.C2S.933
20.052.114 10.442.811
14.602.003 15.51G.329
19.lN6.3S0 20.090,763
.y... 20.822.04S 13.311.4SS
28.903.324 20.537.184
The great gain here noticed, particu
larly in our exports to China, comes
about through our Pacific ports. It will
be observable, too, in our trade with
Japan, just as soon as the war risk
shall cease. There can be no question
that the United States within a time'
not distant will have the leading place
in the commerce of Oriental countries.
The Pacific Ocean, as a result of It, will
eventually become an American sea;
The awakening, of China, largely
through the movements of Japan, will
produce great results. China has in
hand projects for reorganization of her
fiscal system, which will put new life
Into the sluggish body of her vast pop
ulation. Our own position in the .Ha
waiian Islands and in the Philippines
will be a powerful factor In this growth
of Oriental trade with the United
States. China will be threaded' with
railroads. Japan will push her own en
ergies and activities to the utmost.
Our Pacific commerce will grow to pro
portions that now can scarcely, be Im
agined. It was no great contest in California
that resulted in the election of Frank
P. Flint as United States Senator. It
appeared to be conceded that the Sena
tor should go to the South; and Senator
Bard, the Incumbent, who desired re
election, was distinctly out of touch
with the Republican organization and
was not especially strong with the peo-
"Ple. With "the "poll tjcians, geography,
.and bis own wide personal ifollowing
behind him, to say nothing of the
Southern Pacific Railroad. Mr. Flint
achieved an early triumph. It is tald
to. have been a clean campaign. In the
sense that there was no boodle and the
railroad Influence was not exerted In
any manner obnoxiously or even Im
properly. Presumably, then, while the
railroad was for Flint, he Is by no
means its creature. Better days polltl
ically seem to have dawned for California.
TARIFF REVISION" PROBABLE.
The President Is much In earnest
about tariff revision, as he-is in earnest
about railroad rebates and freight-rate
discrimination. He is always in
earnest, and when once he puts his
hand to the plow, he does not turn
back. "When the election was over he
Immediately caused It to be known that
the Dingley tariff in all Its schedules
did not, in his judgment, conform to
existing conditions; but he encountered
instant opposition from the standpat
ters, who say they want to let well
enough alone. "Why, they cried, should
we alarm capital, upset business and
disturb labor by useless tariff agitation,
always a menace to prosperity, a sure
forerunner of Industrial disaster? Aid
rich, Piatt (Conn.), Spooner, Allison,
the able and discreet quartet of guar
dians of commercial peace, who have
labored long and earnestly to make the
United States Senate the democratic
body it is, passed the word down the
line that the Republican party had
never yet made the mistake of reform
ing its own tariff, and It was not going
to begin now. This Is not to Eay that
these wise and patriotic gentlemen did
not think the Republican party capa
ble of .error, thoughIn their opinion It
had never made an error. They were
merely Inspired by an honest and dis
interested view that they knew more
about the subject than anybody else;
besides, they thought the people did
not care assuming thatit really mat
ters whether the people care and Pres
ident Roosevelt might be dissuaded If
he thought his party was not behind
him.
But the party Is behind the President.
Scarcely an important Republican
newspaper In the land has failed to
pronounce its judgment that the dec
laration in the Republican National
platform that the tariff should be re
vised by its friends Is tantamount to a
pledge that it shall be so revised; and
they have, with not many important
exceptions, called on Congress to re
deem the promise. But their demands
fell on deaf ears until the President,
after his wont, took hold of the sub
ject with energy and determination.
All the great Republican leaders, the
backbone of the do-nothing policy, were
summoned to the "White House and the
tariff Issue as well as the freight ques
tion was candidly discussed. As a re
sult we are promised definitely careful
examination of the question by Con
gress, and a new tariff bill to be con
sidered at a special session to be called
In the Fall of the current year.
The authority of President Roosevelt
before Congress and before the people
Is paramount. It exceeds vastly the
power to shape legislation possessed by
any President within a generation. It
arises from and has Its foundation on
the complete confidence reposed by the
Nation as a whole in the President's
probity. In his Impartiality, In his cour
age, In his statesmanship, and above
all In his -desire and purpose to do
Justice to all interests, the individual,
the corporation, the politician, the
whole public. No Senator, however
surely intrenched In the confidence of
his party and however sure of himself,
his opinions or his influence, feds that
he can stand for a moment in the
way of the President's plans; no co
terie of Senators or Representatives, or
both, however powerful, and however
essential to a judicious administration
of public affairs, cares In the present
statepf the public mind to accept any
issue whatever with the President. So
we shall have tariff reform, or rather
tariff revision, because the Republican
party promised It, the people desire it,
and the President has Indorsed it.
SCBUUBAX RAILROADS.
The announcement made yesterday
that the new gasoline motor car or
dered by the Southern Pacific Railroad
for use between Portland and Forest
Grove has been completed In Kansas
City and is ready for shipment to this
city Is curiously coincident with the
statement, also made In the same issue,
that arrangements for the electric line
from Portland to Hillsboro are made,
and that construction is to commence
at once.
It never rains but It pours. For
many years the Inhabitants of
"Washington County have been praying
for a better service between them and
the metropolis. Their prayers were un
answered until they bestirred them
selves to offer Inducements lo outside
parties to come in and build an electric
road. Even so much effort bore no
fruit, and the Washington County
farmers had either to haul themselves
and their produce to a Southern Pacific
station, with two passenger trains and
one freight a day, or to plow through
the muddy roads with old-fashioned
wagon and team for the twenty-odd
miles over the hills Into Portland. And
the question is now presented. Can the
traffic which did not tempt the South
ern Pacific Railroad to put on a quick
and frequent suburban service over an
already constructed and operated steam
railroad suffice to make It worth while
to construct the new electric road,
equip it. pay for electrical power, pro
vide the suburban service and meet
the competition of this new gasoline
motor-car service of the Southern Pa
cific? One or two points of comfort for the
electric line may be suggested. The
first Is that, although the town of
.Hillsboro. twenty miles from Portland,
is the objective point oneach route,
yet the country traversed is very different-
The territory of the electric
road Is practically new to railroads,
very fertile, and will afford traffic only
now In Infancy. If the issues were to
be fought out between the old-fashioned
steam railroad and the new elec
tric road, the arguments which have in
duced the construction of electric sub
urban roads all over the United States
would control. For example. It would
be pointed out that electric traction
overshadowed steam traction In (1) gen
eral comfort of the passenger; (2) clean
liness; (3) ventilation; (4) lighting;
(5) speed; (C) facility for frequent stop
pages and far better acceleration of
speed after a stoppage; (7) more fre
quent service.
That these advantages aer appreci
ated by the public appear In the carry
ing from Cleveland. O.. In 1902. of eight
and one-half millions of passengers
over the three electric roads, as against
the 130,264 carried by the competing
steam roads. The aggregate length of
these three electric roads is ninety-nine
miles. But the Introddctlon of the new
gasoline motor car the first, as we un
derstand, to be put Into regular service
in the United States destroys the com
parison. Here we are No have the fre
quent service, the many stoppages, a
reasonably great speed offered to the
public The advantages expected by
the railroad company introducing this
new method are that the cost of the
equipment will be by many points less
than the outlay needed for the electric
motor car, its trolley system, and the
installation of its power, and that it is
available for use on the existing rail
road without fresh outlay of any kind.
Further, that the services of only two
trainmen for the gasoline car will be
needed. The outcome of this experi
ment will be anxiously watched- If
the new cars do what Ib expected of
them, the way will be clear for the
construction and equipment of light
railroads throughout Oregon". First
cost will be Immensely reduced, and
easy and cheap operation secured for a
long future.
It may be too soon to prophesy. But
from present indications the gasoline
motor car will prove as dangerous a
rival to the electric car as the "Wels
bach gas burner to the electric light.
MBRIDE AND MEAD.
Henry McBrlde, Governor of Wash
ington, and one of the most spectac
ular chief executives that has held the
reins of power in the Evergreen State,
yesterday stepped down, and a new era
In Washington political life was ush
ered in with the Inauguration of Al
bert E. Mead. The retiring Governor,!
a man witn many admirable qualities
which drew around him a following of
warm personal friends, was always a
dangerous man to be clothed with such
power as he wielded from the Govern
or's chair. McBrlde was a driver and
a rusher, and, once his mind was made
up to accomplish a certain object, he
rode roughshod over everything that
lay in his pathway, regardless of the
fact that some of the obstacles might
be the rights of a people not at all
times In accord with his views.
As an - exponent of that dangerous
theory that the end justifies the means,
Henry McBrlde was a success; but that
theory never s.ood the test of time.
His personal likes and dislike. always
biased his political Judgment, and as a
persuader he used- the bludgeon in pref
erence to reasonable argument. His
connection with the railroad-commission
issue is well known throughout
the state. It is a matter of record that
while Governor Rogers was alive Mc
Brlde thought It would be unsafe to
place the appointing power of a com
mission In the hands of the chief ex
ecutive; but as soon as McBrlde came
into power through the death of Rog
ers he regarded it as a vital matter
that he be given authority to appoint a
commission. The people of Washing
ton are about to gain their long-sought'
prize, but it has not been hastened- by
any act of McBride's; and, today there
are half a dozen commission bills be
fore the people In the preparation of
which the retiring chief executive has
not even been consulted.
The new Governor, Albert E. Mead,
enters on his career under exception
ally favorable auspices. No man who
ever reached the high office was sub
jeeVed to more villainous abuse and
misrepresentation than was showered
on him from the -day of the Tacoma
convention- He fought hlstway to vic
tory in the face of this bitter opposi
tion without In any war compromising
himself, and is accordingly In a posi
tion to do as he pleascs.- His record
in the Legislature and elsewhere In
public life is clean and honorable, and
he "holds the respect and confidence of
the better element of his party. .Judg
ing from this record and the personal
ity of the man, his administration will
not be a, disappointment to the party
that placed him in office.
Governor Mead's record in the
past impresses one with the belief that
he will be content to lead and not to
drive. If he should continue this policy
he has an excellent prospect for healing
some of the vers severe wounds that
have distressed the Republican party
of the State of Washington for a num
ber of years. At the beginning of his
career as chief executive of one ofvthe
greatest states in the Union Albert E.
Mead has the confidence and rspect of
all who know him, and the best wishes
of thousands who have hot that pleas
ure, but will be deeply interested In his
actions.
WASHINGTON AT THE FAIR.
The determination of the Washing
ton State Legislature to provide a lib
eral appropriation for the Lewis and
Clark Fair Is evidence that our neigh
boring state still has plenty of broad
gauge men who are ever willing to
place the general welfare of the state
above their own personal likes and dis
likes. Notwithstanding all of the good
which Oregon may derive from the
Fair, the State of Washington Is cer
tain to reap greater returns in propor
tion to the investment than will be en
Joyed by Oregon. This Is due to the
fact that Washington has for a number
of years had the advantage of much
more liberal advertising in the Eastern
States than has been the case with
Oregon. The Eastern visitors who will
be attracted to the West by the Fair
will accordingly pay just as much at
tention to Washington and its wonder
ful resources as they will to our own
state.
Back of all this pecuniary advantage
there isalso a strong sentimental rea
son why" our neighboring states should
extend the liberal aid which Is now
forthcoming. When Lewis and Clark
came Into the country there were no
state or territorial lines in this new
land, and the trail they blazed brought
the entire Northwest Into touch with
civilization. Few. if any. of the visit
ors to the Exposition will miss a ride
up and down the magnificent Columbia,
and from the Cascades to the sea they
will view as much of Washington as
they will of Oregon, and they will find
indeed "one country and one-people."
The visitor who comes to the Fair by
the Northern routes will, of course, stop
over to see world-famous Puget Sound
and the wonderful cities which have
sprung Into existence along its shores.
The visitor from the South will not re
turn until he has also visited, these
much-advertised places, and thousands
of those who will for the first time visit
the West would not think of returning
without viewing the great wheat, fruit
and stock regions of Eastern Washing
ton and Idaho, or the great timber
districts of the Gray's Harbor country.
So many of the interesting events of
the. early life In the Oregon Country"
centered around the Columbia River
that it is fitting' that the Lewis and
Clark' bills in the Washington Legisla
ture should be- fathered Vr meBafeer
of the Columbia River districts, and
Senator Rands and Jtepres-entatlve
Megler; who made such a hard fight lor
an appropriation two years ago, are en
titled to the thanks of both Oregonians
and Washlngtonians. It was unfortu
nate that the heat o the Senatorial
campaign was. so great two years ago
as to defer action on the matter until
this time. The appropriation, which
passed both houses, while not as large
as the one which will now be available,
would have been of great benefit In
starting operations, and it was sanc
tioned, not only by a majority of the
members in both houses, but by the
people at large.
However, there Is nothing slow about
our enterprising neighbors on the
north, and they are generally thorough
in heir work. For these reasons we
may expect them to be there on time
with a building and an exhibit in keep
ing with the great state which It will
represent. Incidentally; Oregon will re
joice with them over the praise which
they will surely merit and win, for
Washington In a sense will always re
main a portion of what was known to
Lewis and Clark as the Oregon Country.
The Montana Mlssoullan notes re
proachfully the absence from the wide
ly published list of the notable dead of
ISO the name of Chief Joseph. Joseph
passed but now from the stage of life
that he made at one time a- bloody one.
A .good runner, a game fighter, latterly
a man of peace by compulsion there
were many Incidents of his spectacular
career that gave token of a brave,
haughty and Implacable spirit. His
record as a warrior is, however, blot
ted with the blood of women and chil
dren, and his name and fame do not
command unqualified admiration, albeit
there is no question b'ut he was a man
of great courage and persistent pur
pose. -But Joseph was not a philoso
pher, since he was unable to accept the
terms of his defeat uncomplainingly,
and, eaten up by discontent, he "re
pined and groaned and withered from
the earth" while yet scarcely beyond
the prime of his years.
A pathetic feature, from our point of
view, of General Nogl's stubborn In
vestment of Port Arthur is the fact
that his two sons were killed during
the siege, one at NanBhan and the other
at 203-Meter Hill. Answering a. refer
ence made to this double loss by Gen
eral Stoessel In the Interview between
them that followed the surrender, the
loyal and stoical Japanese General re-,
plied, smilingly, that he felt that his
sons' lives were not sacrificed In vain,
since the points at which they fell were
of the greatest importance to the Jap
anese army. One vaguely wonders
whether these Impassive disciples of
Buddha do not feel the sting of death
for themselves or their children, or are
so thoroughly schooled In self-control
thaf, suffering even as others do, they
smile and make no sign of distress?
Very effectively the Northern Pacific
Railroad Company continues exploita
tion of the Lewis and Clark Centennial.
In a pamphlet of forty-eight pages,
written by Olln D. Wheeler, there is
presented concisely the story of the
expedition and an excellent prospectus
of the great Fair, Including a very fine
birdseye view of the grounds. The pub
lication is illustrated appropriately, all
the pictures being up to the Northern
Pacific's high standard. Curiously, the
railroad reserves for Its otn adv;ertiH-
mcnt only three pages of modest an
nouncement. Through the enterprising
paswmger agents who visited Portland
recently the pamphlet will have very
wide and effective distribution.
With the resumption of the Piatt case
in New Tork three extraordinary
women are again in the public eye.
Hannah Ellas, the colored woman who
is said to have obtained three-quarters
of million from the ancient Mr. Piatt,
had the smallest financial success. Mrs.
Webb-Duke can hardly be accurately
classified as yet, but all Indications
point to her operations In the financial
world having run up Into millions. Mrs.
Chadwlck, so far, remains queen of the
trio. The strange thing Is that three
such stars should occupy the stage at
the same time.
It cannot but please the peoples of
the two great states of Oregon and
Washington to note the Instantaneous
way In which their Legislators throw
themselves into the collar of business
and prepare for the uphill pull of the
early part of the session. Hardly was
the House open at Salem before three
resolutions were offered asking for
postage stamps for the use of mem
bers, and with similar snap the wise
men at Olympla agreed that the state
owed every legislator a fountain pen.
Courtesy to their hostess probably
prevented guests at Mrs. William As
tor's ball Monday night from display
ing jewels of greater value than those
she wore. Mrs. Aster's Jewels were
worth $750,000, the guests In the next
class showing gewgaws valued at from
$400,000 to 5500,000. Women wearing
less than 5200,000 worth of precious
stones did not glitter enough to attract
the attention of the society reporter,
and had to sink Into a sparkless ob
scurity. It wasn't their night to shine.
Sailors demanding overtime pay be
fore turning to on board a vessel In
danger of going to pieces present a
spectacle that Is fortunately rare, and
Captain Carlson, of the steamer Lakme,
who related the story to Government
officials in San Francisco, declared that
he was so surprised that he had to
get the crew to work by the use cf ca
jolery and diplomacy. The sailors of
the Lakme were lucky in not finding
themselves cajoled with an Iron bar of
convenient length.
The substance of ex-Governor Mc
Connell's testimony at the Smoot in
quiry was that the Mormons are all
right, and that the Gentiles In the
Idaho Legislature play poker. Gover
nor McConnell ought to know.
Mr. Croker has troubles of his own
In England. Too bad that a good man
like Mr. Croker cannot pass his final
days in the serene peace that comes
from a life of benevolence, rectitude
and good deeds ,
Two young men in Tacoma. on being
arrested for theft, said that they were
destitute, and. being too proud to beg.
stole Instead. Pride and reason never
could live together.
The sight of Governor Pennypackers
muzzle has set every newspaper In
Pennsylvania barking furiously.
- K0TJ? AMD C0UHXKT. .
- r- -
By the way. hasn't the 1003 prune crop
failed yet?
Governor Pennypacker's Idea of a good
muscle Is the guillotine.
The Japanese are having a long Job
clearing away the mines around Port
Arthur. The Russians used the popular
naval plan of discovering uncharted reefs
by bumping Into them.
So long as discontented Americans con
fine their bomb-throwing to statues., and
military statues at that, they can't be
placed In the European class.
Ten thousand Poles In the Port Arthur
garrison, according to the Dally Tele
graph's correspondent, were indifferent
fighters. The D. T. man must mean "dif
ferent fighters."
Whitman County's prosecuting attorney
will try to check the habit of carrvlnr
Iconcealed weapons. In the confident ex
pectation ot tnereby having less work
to do In murder cases.
Almost as famous as 54-40 Is 11-7.
Judge -Houston, of Tacoma, who Is an
entertaining "remlnlsccr- told of throw
ing a baseball 298 feet. It stands merely
as a court record, however.
IJmburger in the registers made It the
Albany High, School for a time.
Mrs. Chadwlck's diamonds are in soak,
just like the ordinary poor-millionaire's.
Professor Meson, of Washington, has
gone Professor Schuyler, of St. Louis, and
Professor Maxwell, of New York, one
better on the question of woman's slip
shod mode ot walking. The other dis
tinguished pedagogues confined, their re
marks to schoolmarms and their careless
we hasten to add, allegedly careless
way of walking, but Professor Mason
goes further and says that woman Is not
built for running, adding that "she may
walk like a goddess, but she runs like a
hen." There, is good ground, for the out
spoken Professor Mason's remark, as
contemporary observation discloses, but
one cannot Justly attribute It to any
more deep-seated reason than skirts.
Diana, who would hardly "give unto tho
flying hart space to breathe, how short
soeven," was not encumbered with flap
ping petticoats, nor did Atlanta outdis
tance her panting If pantless suitors un
der tho handicap of even a rainy-day
skirt. Nor, If magazine Illustrations are
to be believed, do the young amazons of
the girl's colleges run 100 yards In 11
seconds or thereabout In the garb they
wear at a dance. The "winning wave,
deserving note In the tempestuous petti
coat" has nothing to do with winning
footraces, and Professor Mason should at
tribute woman's (alleged) hen-like gait to
the fashion of her clothes rather than to
the fashion of her making. Even under
this handicap some women can run more
like bares than hens. Detective Hawley
could Inform the Washington educator on
this point. Although not exactly built to
rival a Duffy, Hawley can catch up with
most of tho truant boys he has to arrest,
but Julia Shea, a sixteen-year-old girl,
ran rings around him and finally disap
peared under a bridge. Anyway, some
hens can run faster than others.
The Irxigon Irrigator carries the "pat
ronize home industry" idea to an unwar
ranted extreme. Witness this mean gibe.
"It is currently rumored," says the paper
"that one of our young men Is going
away in a few days to bring back a -wife.
We; .take come stock. In another rumor,
to the effect that he has been refused by
every girl In Irrigon."
To make a "Scripture" cake, the fol
lowing recipe Is given by the Atchison
Globe:
Four cups of I Kings. lv:22; Ift cups of
Judges. v:25 (last clause); two cups Jeremiah.
vi:20: two cups Nahum. 111:12; two cups I
Samuel. xxz:12; one cup Numbers. xvll:S; two
tablewpoonfuls I Samuel. xlv;25; season with
two drops Chronicles, !x:9:six drops Jeremiah.
xvli:ll: a pinch of Leviticus, 11:13; one-half
cup Judges. iv:10 Oast clause); two tablespoon
fuls Amos, Iv:5.
An' Atchison woman, who has been engaged
in writing a book for the past flvo years, has
given It up because ahe can't find a man she
ran portray as the hero. Sho has the beat
father In Atchison; her husband is one of the
finest, and her four brothers are considered
among the town's beat boys. But the. woman
has looked them over, and decided that none
of them will do. This fettle it; her book will
be mawkish when- It appears. Atchison Globe.
If a book is to be mawkish because the
woman writing it couldn't pick a hero
out of six men. what will Hattie Ermlnle
Rives' book be like when she couldn't
And a hero among all Portland's brave
and true?
Tubbs versus tips Is a fight raging In the
Missouri Legislature. Tubbs has Intro
duced a bill providing a penalty of $300
for allowing a tip to be received, the pro
prietor of the hotel or restaurant being
held liable. Tubbs represents G&sconada
County, so that his bill Is doubly a gas
conade. "The girl that is popular Is the girl
who laughs," says the Kansas City World.
"She laughs with her beaux but never at
them." Similarly the man that is popu
lar Is the man who smiles, not at his
friends, but with them.
WEX. J.
Little Walter's Poor Little Brot'ier.
S. S. Klser in Chicago Record-Herald.
A year ago I got to be
A Utile baby's brother.
And since he come, why him nor me
Ain't neither had no mother.
ily" father says she's went to, etay
Away up there above us.
And always watch us every day
And not forget to love us.
And father says It's God what brings
Around tbc'ilttle brothers.
And sees all things and knows all things
And takes away our mothers.
There's something that I can't we through:
My father says God brought him
If God sees all and knows all. too.
I wonder why we got him;
I don't see why he'd want-to giTe
A boy & little brother
That had to come on earth to live
And never have a- mother.
I'm sorry for tha little chap
That's lyin' there and crow In
And cut tin' teeth In nurse's lap
And never, never knowin.
If I was God you'd never see ,
Another little brother
Brought down on earth again t be
Left here without hU mother.
High Fare Below Stairs.
Hearth and Home.
Most London servants are served
with food no less than seven times a
day. They partake of tea, like their
masters, on awakening. Breakfast. la
"the room' for the upper functloa
arles. In the servants' hall for the les
ser. Is a substantial meat meal. At II
o'clock beer or milk and light refresh
ments are set forth, and bridge th
time till a heavy repast at 2 o'clock or
so. Tea. and then an elaborate din
ner and refreshments or light supper
about 10 o'clock, bring the number at
meals up to seven.
THE RECORD SMASHERS OF 1904
Caries ad bttercsSa Eveata la All Lists of Hamam Actlvity-Craak-aa
la AH Ita Straagrf MaBlfestatiean.
New Tork Sun.
HR strenuous record-smashers-' made
things .hum during the year just
closed. Chicago produced the prize
villain, a man who was accused In court
by his wife, sister and employer with de
sertion, ingratitude, theft, lying. Intem
perance, profanity and singing "Bcdella"
when the neighbors wanted to sleep.
A Pennslyvanla farmer won a medal
from his neighbors by having his wifo ar
rested for cruelty because she Insisted on
working a phonograph overtime on the
tormenting air "Hiawatha" in spite of all
protests.
In St. Louis a thirsty man drank nine
quarts of whisky In 34 hours and died.
The classic town of Evanstown, the seat
of Northwestern University, developed
the biggest pie eater of the year. Five
thick. Juicy pies a la mode smothered Jn
Ice cream devoured at a single sitting
was the new record set by Ed. O'Laughlln
In a contest with Lawrence English, who
lost by half a pie.
But In the drinking line Harry E.
"Vale of Englewood. a Chicago suburb,
seems to have taken the bun. "He drank
up our bakery," said Mrs. Vale In her
suit for divorce. "It was a pretty big
drink, but he swallowed it In short oft
der." Checks to saloonkeepers aggregat
ing several thousands of dollars showed
what that big drink had cost.
An ambitious Missourlan wrote 40,063
words on a postal card, a feat In chlrog
raphy almost as difficult to achieve as
would be a sane explanation as to why bo
did It
During a fire In a New York hotel a
woman dressed herself In less than 15
minutes. This record Is likely to stand
for at least a century.
Percy T. Bennelt"ls a man that New
Jersey 'Judges called the champion long
distance pianist of the world without
waiting to hear from all the young ladles
who are practicing "The Maiden's Pray
er." In a Newark theater Bennett bat
tered out "Farewell, My Lady Love." etc.,
for 24 hours at a Btretch. when compas
sionate friends Interfered and dragged
him home bodily, though he threatened
another explosion.
Miss Maggie Albany's remarkable
achievement as a Sunday school pupil
brought her a gold watch early In 1S04.
For 2S years without a single dereliction
she had attended the services of the Ebe
nezer Methodist Sunday School In Phila
delphia. Sho began at the age ot 3 years.
"If I die at 30," she said proudly, "It will
be a 77 year's record."
In the year's harvest of oddities two
enormous photographs cut no1 mean fig
ure. .One was a picture of the Gulf of
Naples, made by a Berlin company and
shown at St. Louis. It was 29 feet long
and 5 feet high the largest photograph
ever produced In the world.
. The other was a photograph of the Chi
cago Board, of Trade showing the bulls
and bears clamoring In the pit at fever
heat. Twelve pounds of flashlight powder
was used by the operator, this powder be
ing distributed at 330 different points
around the balcony and Ignited simultan
eously by electricity.
Two record-smashing families bound for
Chicago landed from a steamer at Balti
more In April. The head of one family
was Joseph Zowinskl. aged 78. whose
sons daughters and grandchildren num
ber 30. The head of the other was Carl
Zenke, the father of a brood numbering
17. The Two Million Club, for promoting
population, ought to hand out a few med
als to Joe and Carl.
All hands agree to place tho terpslcho
rean pennant over the domicile of Mrs.
John Polinski. a Jersey City bride who
danced 67 times at her wedding reception
and then fell In a swoon. She had kept
her feet twinkling from 4 P. M. until long
after midnight, and It took, a quick and
BITS OF OREGON LIFE.
Johnnfe and His Gun.
Dayton Chronicle.
John Bowen, aged 12. who lives on Eck
Ier Mountain, killed .a large bob-cat last
Saturday. The animal had stolen a
chicken and ran up a tree, making a
splendid mark for Johnnie with his gun.
Tough Joke on Cornie.
Port Orford Tribune.
A case of whisky sent down to Gold
Beach by Cornie Woodruff to a friend
was changed by hocuspocus into a case of
coal oil when delivered, and It would take
the whole sky to paint the recipient's
huge disgust.
Gertrude Meant Business.
Proaser Record.
Gertrude Herke, with wrath In her eye
and a shotgun In her hand, drove three
surveyors, who were surveying a line
across her land for an Irrigation ditch,
from her place on the Upper Ahtanum, In
this county, Saturday. The men had pro
ceeded but a short distance with their
work when the woman appeared.
Increasing His Deadhead List.
8 Condon Times.
The News man. of Mitchell, was out the
other day when soma one left a goose In
the office. When the next paper came
out the editor said that If the person who
left the goose would come around he
would receive a year's subscription to the
News, with the reported result that 14
men and one woman claimed the goose.
Let It Be Nesmith.
Salem Statesman.
In all probability thre will be & new county
created at this session ot the Legislature out ot
a portion of Crook and Wasco Counties, upon
which question the Statesman has no opinion
to offer, but it does desire to suggest that If
the proposition matures tha proposed name of
"Stockman" b abandoned for another more
appropriate for such purpose.
The Oregontan has suggested that thf new
county be named "Nesmith." and the States
man desires heartily to second the motion.
Senator Xesmith was one of the moat active
and best known of our early pioneers, having
come to Oregon In 1343, and from that date
for nearly 40 years was a prominent part of
the life of the territory and state.
Especially was hla service of value to Xhe
Nation during the days of the Civil War, when,
though elected as a Democrat, he was of
striking aid to the administration of President
Lincoln, and was given credit for it by our
great war President.
In 1860 he was elected to the tJnited Stat2S
Senate, with Edward D. Baker as his col
league, after whom one of our counties was
named more than 40 years ago. If a new po
litical subdivision is to be created It would be
bat the Just recognition of one of the most
eminent of our early pioneer statesmen to call
it Xetenlth County,
How Rank a Farce!
Eugene Register.
The Indictment of Mayor Williams of
Portland upon the most flimsy pretext,
one sd glaringly absurd that the District
Attorney at once dismissed the case,
shows how rank a farce a grand Jury can
be without half trying. To satiate the
spite and venom of a motley gang Is ndt
the high purpose for which the average
grand Jury Is drawn. Quashing of the
Indictment meets with popular favor
amongst right-thinking people who are
the vast majority In the State of Oregon.
It Is Not Kind.
Washington Post.
Before getting too deeply Interested In
stories under a Portland, Or., date line.
It Is well to see. If It does not carry an
advertisement for the Lewis and Clark
Exposition.
-clever doctor to pull her back to xon
sclousness. At South Bend. Ind.. Miss Mary Mamie
Tutt. a saleswoman, married George P.
Morehead. a well-to-do merchant. In haste,
but subsequent events came so swift that
she never thought of repentance. A I!w
minutes after the ceremony Mrt Morehead
willed his bride 0,000; two hours later
he was dead. -
At 4 US o'clock one afternoon B. C.
Dobbins, of Chicago, was closing up a15.
000 business deal for a big department
store; at 4:17 he slipped out to a Justice
shop, and at 4:18 was married to Miss
Elsele; at 40 o'clock ho was back In the
treadmill engaged In another big transac
tion. "No time' for sentiment In this great
age of civilization and progress." he said.
Deserted 14 times in 23 years wa a
record that didn't suit Emma Larsen. of
Chicago, and with the court's aid ahe let
Carl go for keeps.
The speed record for divorce was award
ed to Mrs. May M. Roach, who was set
free from Frederick L. Roach, son of tho
president of the Chicago Union Traction
Company, In proceedings lasting 30 min
utes. After 25 unsuccessful attempts, Cecil
Davis, of Cadillac, Mich., committed sui
cide at Milwaukee by taking poison. Sha
had tried almost every known method. In
cluding bridge-Jumping, and wasafficted
with a suicidal mania. The anal blow fell
when, she was reproved for complaining
about the color of the cutalns in her
room.
The biggest lobster ever seen In Chi
cago arrived from the Atlantic coast In
November. It weighed 18 pounds and 8
ounces, was over eight feet long and had
claws 15 Inches in length. The dealers
estimated ita age at 100 years. As it died
on the way a fine lot of salad was miss
ing. Monster, a ribbon-bedecked Iowa steer
weighing 3,060 pounds, broke all records
for heft at the livestock show in Chicago.
The largest rabbit hunt ot the year took
place In Oregon in January, when it was
reported that 10,000 cottontails were killed.
Bome TOO men and women participating in
the slaughter.
Miss Mae Carrlngton. of Springfield.
Mass.. In a typewriting contest at Madi
son Square Garden, New Tork, made a
record of 100 words a minute blindfolded.
At the St. Louis Fair. S. F. Cole, of Cats
kill, N. Y.. broke the world's record for
the greatest number of words In seven
continuous hours of typewriting. His to
tal was 28,944 words, an average of nearly
68 words a minute.
Mayor McClellan, of New Tork, set a
lively gait In autograph work by signing
his name 37,000 times on a new Issue of
city bonds. Mr. Armstrong, Assistant Sec
retary of the Treasury at Washington, has
signed his name to official documents
more than 6000 times a day with a pen.
but often he had to resort to massage to
keep hla arm in working order.
In a contest by Chicago bank clerks- Le
moyne S. Hatch proved the adage that
practice makes perfect by counting a to
tal of 56000 In notes of various denomina
tions In the record-breaking time of
21:05 4-5.
The total number of postal orders issued
by the Government during the last fiscal
year passed the 50,000,000 mark for the
first time In history, the gross revenue of
the business being 33,626,676.
Marshall Field shattered all previous
records In taxpaying. The Chicago mer
chant paid on an assessed property val
uation of 340,000,000, which placed him at
the head of heavy taxpayers In the United
States.
The youngest baby In the world to start
life with a bank account was Hiram Gold
stein, of New York. 320 having been placed
to his credit one hour after his birth.
Little Miss WIdener. of Philadelphia, re
ceived tho handsomest birthday gift; at
the age of 3 she received checks for 3500,
.000. New York Sun.
WHERE NOAH LIVED-
Washington Star.
X. V. Millard, who now resides in In
dianapolis, has been for several years
studying tho archaeology of Egypt. For
the last year, until his recent return
to this country, until his recent return
making excavations at various places
on the Nile, especially at Glzcb, In the
neighborhood of the great Pyramid of
Cheops.
"I have discovered during the last
three years," said Mr. Millard, "Just
whore Noah lived, where the. ark was
built, and that Noah built the great
Pyramid of Khufu, known as the Py
ramid of Gizeh.
"Noah was 'the greatest King this
world has ever seen. He was tho great
est of thu Egyptian Pharoahs. not ex
cepting Barneses the Great.
"Noah was a millionaire. The Bibli
cal account of the flood gives no clue
as to where he lived or where his ship
carpenters were at work for 120 years
constructing the ark.
''Noah was 600 years old when the
flood came. It Is evident that he must
have been a millionaire and a man of
great authority. He built the ark at
his own expense. Such a boat in those,
times would cost more than 3500,000.
He must have been In a position to
force vast multitudes to work for him,
regardless of their Interest In him or
In his work, or of their own personal
Inclinations.
"Noah built the great pyramid dur
ing the earlier part of the fourth
Egyptian dynasty, and not more than
1200 years after God had expelled Adam
and Eve from the Garden of Eden. If
Noah's size and Intellectual powers
were proportioned at his age to durs,
then in brain and brawn and stature
he, too, must have been a giant."
The Soaker's Lament.
Corvallls Times.
Thia Infernal prohibition
Is a sideshow of perdition.
Fur It keeps a feller wlshln
He could go way back and die.
Not a drap has wet me gullet;
Not a glass with booze to All ltr
Not a chance to even smell it
Since the town went dry.
Out and in. them doors was swingia,
Down the drinks wc wur a-eilnginV
And the glasses wuz a-rlngin
In them days gone by;
But them doors stands het. and winklnr
At me as I pass a-thtnktn
How embarrassln Is drinkin
Since the town went dry.
Tes. them doors stands winkin. blinkin.
As I pass a-thinkln. thlnkln'
Of them good old times of drinkin'.
In the days gone by.
Oh. my soul is rilln. rilln'-.
And the prohl's soul is smllln.
Cos the llcker's all a-spilln'
Since the town went dry.
.Hot Springs to Hatch Chickens.
New York Press.
To hatch chickens by means of th
waters of the hot springs at Glenwood
Springs. Colo.. Is the scheme projected by
a wealthy Phlladelphlan. He proposes to
erect eight Incubators near several un
used springs on the south bank of the
Grand River and to employ running hot
water in place of the lamps which usually
supply the necessary heat- The projector
ot this plan hopes to hatch out from 5000
to GC00 eggs each month.
The Federal Inquisition.
Bend Bulletin.
It may be asserted with confidence
that but for the presence of Theodore
Roosevelt at the head of the Government
this Investigation would long ago have
been "called off" and the sources of In
formation dried up by putting ttye more
dangerous persons into soft berths of
nubile serviea.