Morning Oregonian. (Portland, Or.) 1861-1937, October 17, 1903, Page 8, Image 8

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    THE MORNING OREGONIAN, SATURDAY, pOTOBER 17, 1903.
Entered at the Postofflco at Portland, Oregon,
as second-class matter.
REVISED SUBSCRIPTION RATES.
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Daily, with Sunday, per year 900
Sunday, per year., 2.00
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TTnlted State. Canada and Mexico
10 to 14-page paper J
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News lor discussion Intended for publica
tion In The Oregonlan should be addressed
'Invariably "Editor The Oregonlan," not to
tho name of any Individual. Letters relating
to advertising, subscription, or to any busi
ness matter should bo addressed simply "The
Oregonlan."
The Oregonlan does not buy poems or
etorles from individuals, and cannot under
take to return any manuscripts sent to It
without solicitation. No stamps should be
Inclosed for this purpose.
Eastern Business Office, 43, 44, 45, 47, 4S,
40 Tribune Building, New Tork City, 510-11-12
Tribune Building, Chicago; the S. C
Beckwlth Special Agency, Eastern repre
sentative. For sale In San Francisco by L. E. Leo,
Palace Hotel news stand; Goldsmith Bros.,
230 Sutter street; F. "W. Pitts, 1008 Market
etrect; J. K. Cooper Co., 740 Market street,
near the Palace Hotel; Foster & Orear, ferry
news stand; Frank. Scott. 80 Ellis street, and
N Whcatley. 813 Mission street.
For ealo In Los Angeles by B. F. Gardner,
C5'J South Spring street, and Oliver & Haines.
205 South Spring street.
For sale In Kansas City, Mo., by Rick
tecker Cigar Co.. Ninth and Walnut streets.
For sale in Chicago by the P. O. News Co.,
217 Dearborn street; Charles MacDonald, 53
Washington street, and the Auditorium An
acx news stand.
For sale in Minneapolis by M. J. Kavanagh,
CO South Third street.
For sale in Omaha by Barkalow Bros., 1012
Farnham street; Megeath Stationery Co., 130S
Farnham street; McLaughlin Bros., 210 S.
Fourteenth street.
For sale in Ogdcn by W. G. Kind. 114 25th
street; James H. Crockwell. 242 25th street;
F R Oodard and C H. Myer3.
For sale in Salt Lake by the Salt Lake
News Co.,, 77 West Second South street.
For sale In Washington, D. C, by the Eb
bctt House news stand.
For sale in Denver, Colo., by Hamilton &
Kendrick, 000-912 17th street; Louthan &
Jackson Book & Stationery Co., 15th and
Lawrence streets; J. S. Lowe, 1320 17th
atreet, and Julius Black.
TESTERDAY'S WEATHER Maximum tem
perature, 74; minimum temperature, 40; pre
cipitation, 0.
TODAY'S WEATHER Increasing cloudiness,
followed by rain; cooler; southeasterly winds.
PORTLAND, SATURDAY, OCT. 17.
TUB CONDEMNATION OK HIIOWNING
A readable if not particularly valu
able discussion of Browning ap
pears In the current Forum." It is by
W. P. Trent, and consists of a review
of the books of Stopford A. Brooke and
G. 1C Chesterton. The most noteworthy
fact about the estimates of the two au
thors and their critic is their sub
stantial agreement in reprobation of
Browning's obscurities. He Is praised
for his lyric and dramatic power, but
his laziness is deplored and his con
scious effort at a profundity which
simulates but does not constitute depth
is outspokenly condemned.
Browning has been read long enough,
dead long enough, dissected and wor
shiped enough for this Judgment to be
accepted as final. It Is the lasting and
effective condemnation of those shallow
and timid souls who have rolled eyes
and clasped hands over labored noth
ings which neither they nor any one
else could understand, but which they
were too cowardly to acknowledge as
the blemishes they are. Both Brooke
and Chesterton "are differentiated from
those perfervld- apologists for every
thing Browning wrote, who have
earned for themselves the glory or the
obloquy that attaches to the undiscrim
lnating disciple"; and neither of them
"Insults the common sense of humanity
by denying that he is frequently dif
ficult and sometimes impossible to com
prehend." Another Interesting agreement of the
three critics is the clear 'apprehension
of the logical development of the poetic
fuculty: "The Immature, but promising
work of his early years, the successful,
distinctive work of his, prime, and the
still notable, but not wholly satisfac
tory work of his period of slow de
cline." The generalization that natur
ally suggests itself from this descrip
tion will be applied by most readers
to Tennyson, whose fame is more and
more resting, like Browning's, upon his
early and middle lyrics, and less and
less upon his later and more ambitious
efforts. It was so with Bryant, it was
so with Longfellow, and perhaps with
ports as a class.
All this may be nothing more than
a paraphrase of the obvious fact that
the young mind Is fresh and the old
one Jaded. We have been accustomed
t io empnasize tne ruie in tne realms or
imaginative work, like poetry, painting
and Invention; but it is to be doubted
whether this limitation of its scope is
sound. Scientific men, for example, have
been spared long enough to show that
their old age is apt to be barren. It
is a good deal so with philosophy, a
field of thought in which. If anywhere,
youth's enthusiasm should be correct
ed and purified by the experience and
calm contemplation of age. Financiers
are apparently as helpless after 50 as
inventors are, though this is sought to
b2 explained by the adaptation of the
terminology of poetry and fancy to the
world of investment. The daring flights
of J. P. Morgan, for example, are re
ferred back to the imagination of his
grandfather, hymn-writer.
Certain it Is that the precoclouBness
of Bryant, writing "Thanatopsis" at 18;
and of Macaulay giving us that match
less essay on Milton at 25, of Keats
end Byron, can be fully matched by
the statesmanship of "William Pitt,
chancellor of the exchequer at 23, by
the military achievement of Napoleon,
First Consul at 30, and in finance by
John D. Rockefeller, president of
Standard Oil at 31. In the world of let
ters the old tradition of slowly ripen
ing powers is still supported by the
supreme case of Shakespeare, whose
"Comedy of Errors" is thought to ex
emplify the ardor of youth; whose
powerful "Hamlet," "Macbeth," "Othel
lo' and "Lear" ornamented his middle
year, whose "Winter's Tale," "Cym
beline" and "The Tempest" are thought
to -breathe that loftier air of calm con
templation which belongs to the decline
of life. Yet Shakespeare is an excep
tion to all rules. And he died at 52.
French merchants have conceived the
Idea of chartering a large steamship
for tho purpose of making a prolonged
cruise of inspection in the LevantJThe
presidents of all the principal Boards
of Trade will make the voyage, and
the Turkish, Grecian and other mar
kets will be visited. Considerable in
terest is being manifested by French
exporters, and the Isle de France, which
oa already been engaged, is likely to
be crowded with business men. In this
connection it may be noted that Aus
trian merchants are fitting out a float
ing exhibition of Industrial objects for
use in the same waters, on the lines of
a similar enterprise that proved very
successful a few years ago. Not long
ago such a plan was proposed on the
Coast, and it is evident that the Aus
trlans would have no more success than
an American, steamship in Asiatic
waters.
RUSSIA THE GREAT.
It has been the ardent dream of so
thorough an Englishman as Henry Nor
man that an alliance might b'e formed
between Great Britain and Russia. This
Is not the conventional attitude of the
Saxon toward the Cossack. Usually
Russia's power is given as a reason for
fighting her. Mr. Norman Views it as
a reason for uniting with her. He has
been in Russia and knows its possibili
ties. The most populous country in the
world is China; the next is India; the
next is Russia. In area Russia stands
at the head of the list, with 8,660,000
square miles twice that of China and
nearly three times that of the "United
States. The population was 129,000,000
in 1S97. Its annual excess of births over
deaths is 1,250,000. Europe has seven
cities of over 1,000,000 inhabitants. Eng
land has one, France one, Germany
one, Austria one, Turkey one; Russia
has two.
Russia's debt Is $3,200,000,000; but so
skillfully Is It supported that every dol
lar borrowed by its government for
many years has extinguished a dollar
of debt somewhere else, refunded at
lower interest The greatest railroad In
the world is the Trans-Siberian, 5800
miles long. The crown lands of Rus
sia embrace G40,000,000 acres. Its rev
enues reach nearly $900,000,000 a year.
Its army is 1,000,000 men in peace and
on a war footing 4,600,000. The emanci
pation of the serfs Involved the reclam
ation ty the government of 87,000,000
acres of land. The forests of European
Russia cover 474,000,000 acres.
The productive power of the Russian
people is enormous. In ten years the
exports have practically doubled from
$214,000,000 to $403,000,000, a far higher
rate of Increase than is shown even by
the United States. The products range
over every conceivable form of indus
try, from all kinds of mineral ore to
silk and laces. The autocratic nature
of the government enables It to exe
cute gigantic reformatory undertakings
at will, whether in land, finance or set
tlement Colonies are made in a day
and cities in a night. Railway systems,
ports, harbors, navies, armies can be
brought into being as at the touch of
the magician's wand. There is no op
position to criticise, no ministry to re
sign in pique.
It Is this vital energy of the Russian
people which constitutes the tremen
dous fact without which all speculation
upon Eastern affairs is valueless. What
Japan desires or Qiina hesitates at or
Russia promises is all for the most part
negligible. As well might the ocean
promise to remain forever at ebb as for
Russia to agree to restrain herself from
farther encroachment southward tow
ard the Hoangho and the Persian
Gulf, eastward to Corea.
This husky young giant among the
nations is bound to ,grow. Centuries
must elapse before Its wild and abound
ing youth passes through maturity Into
old age. It Is not strange that other
nations hesitate to put themselves
across Its path. Perhaps Mr. Norman's
idea, of working with it rather than
against it is worth considering.
- A GOOD EXAMPLE,
The Board of Health of Columbus,
Ohio, is taking time by the forelock. It
has directed its secretary to take steps
to prevent the sale of torpedoes and
other explosives that are generally and
freely used In the celebration of Inde
pendence Bay. The resolution recites
that 600 persons were killed, 100 ren
dered blind and 1000 others Injured
by explosives, including the toy pis
tol, on the last Fourth of July.
This is a ghastly showing, truly,
but it is insignificant beside the record
of fright. Inconvenience, apprehension,
distraction and discomfort generally
that resulted from the practice of cele
brating the day with noise and making
it a season of confusion worse con
founded. There is no excuse, either in patriot
Ism or common sense, for permitting
the distractions that make the Fourth
of July the most dreaded and disagree
able day In the whole year to be again
repeated. The time to enter an edict
against the use of explosives on this
occasion is before they are manufac
tured or lnported in large quantities.
If men who deal In such things were
informed officially eight or ten months
In advance of the season of demand
that the sale of explosives, Including
toy pistols, had been prohibited In a
certain city, the merchant who ordered
a supply for that trade would do so at
his own risk and would have no right
to complain if the entire stock was left
on his -hands.
The din and discomfort of the Fourth
of July remains with the orderly por
tions of the public as a vexatious, re
membrance from one 3-ear to another.
This is most unnecessary. The whole
sale use of explosives Inculcates
wastefulness, promotes anxiety and
danger and stifles rather than Increases
patriotism. It makes Independence
Day, above all else the hoodlum's holi
day, deprives it of all possibility of
decorous enjoyment and patriotic -significance.
The Board of Health of Co
lumbus has set . good and timely ex
ample In Its declaration of war upon
toy pistols and other explosives as ad
juncts of Fourth of July celebrations.
It may be hoped that the example is
one which will be generally and
promptly followed by other municipal
Hoards of health. Including our own.
The death of Henry D. Lloyd early in
the present month at his home in a
suburb of Chicago takes from the rad
ical social reformers of the United
States the most brilliant expounder of
their faith. Mr. Lloyd was a literary
champion of industrial radicalism who
commanded the respectful attention of
his opponents upon economical ques
tions and the unbounded confidence and
admiration of those whose views were
in consonance with his own. His con
tribution about 1879 to the North Amer
ican Review of an article on "The Bar
ons of Industry" was among the first
If not the very first notable contribu
tion which gave forewarning of the
dangers of the industrial pools that pre
ceded the great trusts of today. Among
his volumes published on these topics
were "Wealth Against Commonwealth,"
which was a strong arraignment of the
methods employed by the Standard Oil
Company; a "Strike of Millionaires
Against Miners," which contained a
vivid description of the sufferings of the
Illinois miners during the great strike
and lockout at Spring Valley in 1889,
and "Newest England," In which he
warmly championed the industrial re
forms of Australia, Thl3 work upon
the great industrial questions that have
grown up in the period covered by his
life of little more than half a century
Is distinguished as that of a thoughtful
man himself a man of wealth, whose
life whs a sermon, the text of which
was "Unto whomsoever much is given
of him much shall be required."
HAS THE BEST OF IT.
The London correspondent of the
New York Sun reports that Mr. Cham
berlain already has an endrmous fol
lowing, which Is without question
drawn from both parties, with signs of
a political revolution In his favor. He
is described as having seized the.
"psychological moment for creating one
of tho3e tidal waves' of opinion which
for the time being are almost irre
sistible." The Intensity of Interest
and temper displayed Is shown by the
factthat the widest circulated London
newspaper, Independent-Unionist in
politics, which ventured to criticise Mr.
Chamberlain's general plan, has suf
fered such a startling drop In circula
tion that the paper has since given a
cold support to the Glasgow pro
gramme. This fact shows Chamber
lain's strength with the masses.
Assuming this report to be correct, It
only means that Chamberlain for the
moment has the best of the fight There
was a time In the United States when
"free silver at 16 to 1" had the best of
it so completely that free-sllverites
passed their bill in the House and
could have passed It in the United
States Senate if they had not been
persuaded Into believing that the John
Sherman silver act of July, 1890, was
for all practical purposes as good as a
"free silver" act They lost their op
portunity and they never had another,
for the financial fraud and fallacy of
free silver- suffered so complete expos
ure that even the Sherman act was re
pealed In 1893. From that time forward
discussion was so fatal to "free sil
ver" that it had not the smallest chance
of victor after the election of 1894
proved that the drift of public opinion
was with the opposition.
It will be something so with Mr.
Chamberlain's tariff scheme. If you
could elect a'new Parliament tomorrow
Chamberlain and his alter ego; Bal
four, very likely might elect a major
ity of it In their support; but the
campaign has only Just begun and dis
cussion will be fatal in the long run
to Mr. Chamberlain. He is, head and
shoulders, by far the ablest, most bril
liant and most adroit debater that is
before the English political public to
day; but there are able men and able
newspapers -in England that subject him
to a close, hot fire of searching ques
tions. Mr. Chamberlain tells the British
workmen that he proposes to impose
a duty of two shillings a quarter on
foreign wheat, a larger duty on for
eign wheat, but no duty on colonial
wheat, and maize is exempted from
the duty on foreign grain. These duties
he thinks would add something but
very little to the price of a loaf of
bread. He proposes also to impose a
tax of 5 per cent ad valorem on foreign
meat and dairy produce (colonial prod
uce of a similar kind being free of
duty); but from tb.Is tax he exempts
bacon, the animal food of the poorer
part of the British population.
This slight increase in the cost of
wheat bread and of all animal food
save bacon, Mr. Chamberlain would
offset by a reduction of the present
duties on sugar, coffee and cocoa, so
that the British worklngman's weekly
outlay for food purposes would be a
small saving Instead of a small In
crease. This is Mr. Chamberlain's ar
gument 'in support of his project before
the working masses of Great Britain.
It is ingenious and plausible, but it Is
already assailed vigorously by the free
traders, both Liberal and anti-Cham-berlaln
Unionists, who reply that the
moment there is a break from the free
trade system it will be impracticable
to prevent, its ever Increasing exten
sion. A low tax on food in the be
ginning is. sure later to become a
higher-tax; When the Canadians get
the British food market then Australia
win be sure to want the British .'wool
market
To obtain the support of BrltlEh man
ufacturers, Mr. Chamberlain offers to
assure them an absolute control of their
home, market, by imposing duties aver
aging 10 per cent ad valorem on all
Imported manufactures. It Is reported
that there is to be a reorganized Liberal-Unionist
party under the leader
ship of the Duke of Devonshire, which
will Include men of all parties devoted
to free trade, including the Labor lead
er, John Burns. Such a party may be
formed, but the Duke of Devonshire
will not organize it much less Jead It
for while his high personal character
and his position as a very wealthy
landed proprietor give him great per
sonal weight and Influence, he is with
out the talents of an organizer, an ora
tor or a leader. The men who are fit
to lead the opposition to Chamberlain
are Liberals like Campbell-Bannerman,
who Is quick to point out that the
workmen cannot afford to renounce the
free-trade principle, that a duty of 2
shillings a quarter on wheat would
help Canadian wheatgrowers little and
British wheatgrowers not at all; so that
British wheatgrowers would be sure to
demand adequate protection for their
Interests.
The Salvation Army has undertaken
a campaign against sin, Ignorance and
irreliglon In the mountain districts of
Kentucky, Tennessee and West Vir
ginia. Equipped for the contest against
this stubborn triumvirate with ban
ners, brass bands and cymbals; In
vested with courage and fervor as
with a garment and wearing new
khaki uniforms, this detachment of
what may well be called a "grand
army," has undertaken a missionary
campaign in the true apostolic spirit
Setting themselves to do the work
which lies nearest to them, they invade
a home field In which missionary effort
is sorely needed and which is much
more promising than that of many a
foreign field to which the money and
endeavor of the American Board of
Foreign Missions have been given
without stint for years. Already the
advance guard of this detachment of
home missionaries reports the conver
sion of several "bad men," and the
.surrender, as a condition of salvation,
of some of the guns and pistols that
have been part of their household
goods and gods for many years. The
center of operations Is Breathitt Coun
ty, Kentucky, that has-a record of thirty-seven
homicides In two years, among
whom was the Marshal of the county
sent, a town trustee and a, leading
physician. Truly It Is folly ip send
missionaries across the water
wire
fen this
field lies at our very doors.
Probably every member of the human
race since Adam has at one time or
another wondered what the morrow
would bring forth. So far as records
go, all tho wondering was In vain, un
less now and then one of a myriad
guesses turned out to be right With
this in mind, we may scan without un
due emotion a neatly printed series of
extracts sent out anonymously from
Boston to The Oregonlan. Beginning
with a paragraph from Hugh Miller's
"Old Red Sandstone," wherein it is
taught that races are not eternal, the
compiler adds several Irrelevant chunks
of disjointed wisdom before coming to
the crux of the matter. In the final burst
of reason. It Is clearly shown that the
continent Is to sink under the sea on
November 6 thus:
September 8, 1000, a windstorm and tidal
wave at Galveston, Texas, caused 0500 fatali
ties, and destroyed 2000 buildings. A cross
with a representation of Jesus crucified was
left standing at an angle of 45 degrees from
a perpendicular. November 0 will bo 45
days from that date reversed (23). and 2s
times 2000, or 0500 years from Adam. Tho
error of 20 minutes in the year measure,
with the extra day, advanced September 8,
to the position of October 0 (11). In 104S
years (1003 plus 45). Popo Gregory XIII
advanced it 10 and England 11 to November
1 (OJ; thereforeOctober 11, 1003, should be
extended to the position of November 0,
when & submergence may be expected (al
lowing for an error of 3 years).
Just because Boston has sunk a few
feet in the last century she need not
think that we shall follow her example.
A striking example" of the develop
ment of the resources of the earth that
has been going on in recent years is
noted in the growing demand for India
rubber for manufacturing purposes,
and the enormous increase in the lm-"
portatlon of crude rubber. The begin
nings of this Industry are scarcely
more than half a century old. In 1862
the importation of rubber Into the
United States was 2,000,000 pounds;
In 1903 It will reach a grand total of
50,000,000 pounds, while an enormous
bulk of old rubber has this year been
reclaimed and again become merchant
able, i The almost universal use of rub
ber tires on light vehicles has caused a
large Increase In the demand for rub
ber in late years. From the clumsy and
heavy ;goloshes" of a past age to the
gossamer overshoes of the present time
Is a far cry, and the difference repre
sents' a single point in the remarkable
growth of a remarkable Industry that
has virtually been created within a
quarter of a century. A check In this
growth Is only foreseen In a possible
diminishing of the supply through ex
hausting the forests from which it is
drawn.
A number of Blackfoot Indians on a
reservation in Montana awoke, from a
carnival of drunkenness a few days
ago to find their tribe depleted by the
loss of seven killed in combat. The
braves of that once powerful and war
like tribe are furious, as they have a
right to be, at the Indian agent who
permitted firewater to be dispensed to
the Indians. Their fury takes the form
of vengeance, and It is said they Intend
to kill a few white men In order to
even things up. If they could catch
those dlredtly responsible for the trou
ble the ends of Justice might be served
by their fury, but as this is most un
likely, and as civilization has not
taught the savage to discriminate be
tween a guilty and an innocent white
man when he sets out to avenge a mur
der. It may be hoped that prompt meas
ures will be taken to control the In
furiated savages. While Indian wars
are of the past an outbreak of the
kind threatened mas well be dreaded
In a region where settlers would fall
an easy prey to a band of savage ma
rauders out for vengeance.
It is now gravely proposed that Duffy,
the greatest sprinter that has ever
worn a running shoe, should go against
his 100-yard record behind a wlnds
snieia, auee samee Lou Dillon and
Prince Alert, Just to see If he could
clip another fifth off his time. The
proposed attempt would be Interesting,
and it would be a great thing if Duffy
could bring his time down to 9 2-5, but
what would be the result? Simply that
In the future we should see all races
being run behind automobiles with wind
shields, and that the boast of our
runners, that they depend on natural
ability only, would be exploded. With
the exception of better tracks, running
records are no- made under exactly
the same conditions as they ever were,
and It would.be a pity to alter this
state of affairs Just for a momentary
curiosity.
The suggestion from a Chicago speak
er that factory whistles should be
sounded at 8 o'clock In the morning In
stead of 7, so that workmen would be
able to live In the suburbs without
choking themselves with too hasty
breakfasts, is an excellent one. It is
more likely to be put Into practice as
the result of shorter hours of work than
as an Independent reform, for the
evening Is the time that most men pre
fer to have free. When the present
tendency toward the eight-hour day has
produced Its , effect there Is no doubt
that 8 o'clock will be the time of start
ing, for the beneficent trolley car has
spread the homes of the tollers over
places that seemed far out. of reach a
few years ago.
The times, matrimonially speaking,
seem to be sadly out of Joint The class
of men that wives can neither live with
nor leave has expanded and now in
cludes a number of suitors whom young
women dare neither to wed nor reject
The lesson Is in added warning to
young girls to curb the coquettish In
stinct that too often leads them into
trouble, and to parents to guard by
precept and prudent oversight' the lives
of their thoughtless young daughters."
The colonization schemes of European
nations are proving of inestimable ben
efit to the African races, for we learn
from a consular report that Germany
exported last year to her possessions
In East and West Africa 4,128,747 gal
lons of spirituous liquors. It appears,
Indeed, adds Consul-Generai Hanauer,
that spirituous liquors form the chief
export of Germany to her African col
onies. The worst thing about a school of
Journalism Is the endless discussion It
provokes. The dailies having said
everything that could be said and a
little more on the .subject, the month
lies and the reviews took It up, and the
echoes of their clamor are still rever
berating in the East
Dowle must have a press agent How
else could his wife lose a thousand-dollar
diamond?
SPIRIT OF THE NORTHWEST PRESS
Agreeable Hazing?.
Anaconda Standard.
The country at large has no objection
to being hazed by Indian Summer.
Merely Dead Journalists.
Eugene Guard.
The Baker City Herald says that no
living newspaper man can give the
amount of precious metal mined in Baker
County for the "month of September, and
then proceeds to give the exact figures.
Rair Material Unrestricted.
Eugene Guard.
One thing in favor of Professor Lang
ley and his airship fa that the supply of
air in which to launch his airship prob
ably will not give out before he has built
a flying machine that will fly.
Three-Slar HcnnesKr, Possibly.
Pendleton Tribune.
Tho dreamy haze and stuff that dreams
are made of float through our souls and
give us the Joy of childhood again when
the golden leaves are falling and, Pendle
ton puts on her last Summer dress for
a frosty frolic. These are the kinds of
day when one feels glad that he is alive
and will be sorry tomorrow that he didn't
die yesterday.
Impertinence of Mncli Weatlier.
La Grande Chronicle.
The dispensations of Providence do
not alwnys look best to the average per
son. For instance, people were praying
for good weather last week for the good of
the .local fair. The storm king crushed
the fair. This week the weather is good
enough for any kind of outdoor 'enter
prise. The Inevitables is sometimes harsh,
but mankind must accustom itself to It
Joke Visible South, of Salem.
Eugene Register.
That merry Oregonlan trio Wex Jones,
Lute Pease and John Fleming Wilson
did a remarkably amusing piece of com
posite work for Sunday's Oregonlan in
their 'Voyage to Salem city" In quest of
typhoid germs, and capture of the ?500
reward offered for evidence of existence
of such germs in Salem city water. The
skit is mirth provoking to a marked de
gree. Envious of Salem's Advertising.
Albany Democrat
The Salem papers are so credulous that
they even took The Oregonlan microbe
Joke seriously, and one might think they
thought that the people of the outside
world would think that there are really
big microbes crawling around the city
ready to pounce upon visitors and give
them typhoid or scarlet fever, and the
measles. With present advertising and
Mr. Albert's Immense prize up we look
for a rapid growth, in the population of
our sister city, and when the next cen
sus is taken it la safe to predict at least
'10,000 people within the extended city
limits hunting for microbes.
Question of Fact, Xot Sentiment.
Lebanon Criterion.
The Salem papers are red hot after the
State Board of Health because that
board has denounced the city's water
supply and attribute the present epi
demic of typhoid to the bad water. One
can hardly blame these papers for de
fending their own town and incidentally
Its water supply, but unless the board
is clearly wrong the papers do their own
people an Injustice by leading them to be
lieve that, there Is nothing to be feared
from the present water supply. If -the
board is right in condemning the water
those in authority at the Capital city
should set the matter going and not let
it rest until a good and sufficient supply
of water has been secured.
Don't Joke on Painful Topics.
Olympla Olympian.
The current Issue of the Telescope is
out The unique little magazine is up to
Its usual standard, and altogether la a
very attractive number. One thing alono
mars it and that is on the front cover.
Under a picture of grand old Mount
Rainier Is the descriptive "Mount
Alias" followed by a paragraph reciting
the fact that the mountain has two names,
etc It is so apparent an effort to carry
water on both shoulders as to cause the
reader a pain. The Telescope could call
the" mountain by Its official name of Rain
ier or. call it Tacoma, and none of its read
erg would care very much, but all of its
readers will hate to see the popular little
monthly go to the trouble to stir up an
old question and then get "on the
fence."
A Good Show Its Own Best. Ad.
Woodburn Independent
The Lewis and Clark Fair Is being grad
ually advertised throughout the United
States and even this early Jto some extent
across the waters. The tlmeNls not pro
pitious for extensive advertising of the
great event through the ordinary chan
nels. It is efficient just now to impress
the East and South with the fact that
there will be a, great fair here in 1905. The
most Important thing at present is to
prepare for an exposition that will draw.
This, we understand, is being done, and
when all arrangements are perfected, it
will be time to sow the seed of adver
tising broadcast Those who will have
charge of the advertising bureau need no
advice as to the manner In which It
should be managed. Like the merchant,
they will first see what the goods are be
fore entering Into wide publicity.
Walt Till They See Onr George!
Roseburg Review.
These settlers had lived upon the lands
for the past 20 years, built homes and
reared families. Now, despite their plead
ings for their rights, and against the pro
test of Governor Chamberlain in their be
half, the land department by a trick
thwarts the Governor in his effort to aid
his people and delivers a patent to the
lands occupied by them to a soulless cor
poration. Governor Chamberlain Is now
en route to Washington to confer with
the land department officials on this and
other matters In behalf of the people of
our state, having found correspondence
ineffective. This base trlcke'ry resorted to
before the Governor could reach there
Is one of the most contemptible a Nation
al Administration could be capable of.
Former action of the department In re
gard to the public lands of this state has
met with the earnest protest of our peo
ple who are on the ground and know the
real conditions here. Oregon Is cdrtainly
being hard hit by the AVashlngton offi
cials, who will not ven wait a day or
two for the arrival there of our Governor
before taking action on matters of great
importance to our people.
RoKcen Dlin.
Pall Mall Gazette.
In the pray light when motns are flying
. And the weary feet go home.
There's a wild voice calling and crying
Over the cold ealt foam.
It la tho voice of the sea that's walling.
Or the wind In the clover dew? -y
"Tis my hear that makes lament unavailing
For you. for you. for you!
Or, Roaeen Dhu! O, the darkness of your
eyes.
And your honey-dropping smlle3, and your
blo?som-breathlng sighs!
All the day I sorrow In a lonely place apart.
For the sweet rose, tho dark rose, the red
rose of my heart!
In the gray light when stars are fading.
And tho weary dreams go nome.
My soul. In the seas of silence wading.
Sobs In the cold salt foam;
And the wind companions my complaining,
From the fields of the clover dew;
And my empty arms are seeking and straining
To you, to you, to you!
O. Roscen Dhu! O, tho darkness of your
eyes.
And your honey-dropping smiles, and your
blossom-breathing sighs
All the day I sorrow In a lonely place apart.
For the sweet rose, the dark roje, tho red
rose of my heart I
THE S0DTH A.ND THE DEMOCRATS
Chicago Chronicle.
Most genuine Democrats who discuss the
suggestion that Grover Cleveland be
named next year, for President declare
that If he could be nominated he would
stand an excellent chance of election. "He
cannot be nominated," they say, "but
probably if nominated he could be elect
ed." The belief that Mr. Cleveland cannot be
nominated is based on the theory that the
popullstic element In the Democratic
party is still Influential enough to prevent
a two-thirds vote for him In the conven
tion for any other genuine Democrat
It Isto be rememberd that with a real
Democrat In the field there will be no
possibility whatever of hl3 securing an
electoral vote from any of the late Popu
llstic states. Indeed, Mr. Bryan himself,
the favorite of the Populists and a Popu
list himself, gained only a few votes west
of the Missouri River when he made his
second campagln for "the Presidency.
Probably he would not carry a single
Populist state It he were to be a candi
date again next year.
The Southern States and certain of the
great Eastern and Middle States can nom
inate Mr. Cleveland , if the Democratic
leaders therein are disposed to give ex
pression to, the sentiment which prevails
among the' mass of the Democratic elec
tors. The reason why It is generally believed
that Mr. Cleveland could be elected If
given a regular nomination Is found In
the conviction that while his candidacy
would drive off the Populists of the states
which under no circumstances are likely
to vote for the Democratic candidate next
year it would add to the party strength
hundreds of thousands, of Independent
votes in the state which a Democratic
candidate must carry if he is to have any
prospect of success.
Southern leadership can be exceedingly
influential In restoring the Democratic or
ganization to its old-time principles if it
shall be so disposed. Its assent was neces
sary to the wretched surrender to the
Populists in 1S96. If it had adhered to
party tradition and leadership on that
occasion the pitiful blunders of the last
seven years would have been avoided.
Having cost its fortunes in two Presi
dential campaigns with the Popullstic
Democrats of the far West and the Social-,
istic Democrats of some of the states in
the Middle West would It not now be the
part of wisdom for the South to renew
its allegiance with the genuine Democrats
of the North and do what it can to rectlfy
the mistakes of the past?
The Democrats of the South turned the
scale in favor of Bryanlsm in Chicago in
1S95. If they the Interested in any way
in maintaining a Democratic party at the
North they will presently have'an excel
lent opportunity to undo that blunder.
Grover Cleveland can be nominated and
elected If there Is sagacity enough in
Southern Democratic leadership to cut
loose from Populism and by favoring his
nomination let the trimmers and dodger3
at the North know that there Is to be a
Democratic party In the republic once
more.
Ita Use and Its Limit.
Chicago Tribune.
Let us consider, for the sake of illus
tration, that the questioner desires to en
ter the editorial rather that the mechan
ical or business branches of a news
paper, and let us suppose the faculty
to be composed, as it ought to be, of ex
perienced newspaper men. One of them
acting as city editor would send his class
to some event of public interest and re
quire them on their return to write out
accounts of what they had seen. The
professor would then examine the arti
cles and In his lecture point out the
chief defects this one was too florid,
that one neglected entirely the most Im
portant feature, a third was full of im
materialities, while probably all of them
were too long. In a newspaper office
there Is no time for such elaborate ex
planations. The professor would also,
for the benefit of his class, enter Into a
dally analysis of the important newspa
pers of the country, explaining why a
certain event was emphasized In one sec
tion of the country, owing to its local In
terest and neglected In another section,
where it would arouse no Interest The
students would be made to learn the use
of the typewriter and the camera, both
essentials in modern newspaper work,
to read type upside down, the different
sizes of type, and how pictures are
etched. They would be Instructed in the
meaning of printers' symbols used In
correcting" articles, and how to cut an
article In half without Imparing its mean
ing. All this knowledge students could
acquire in a well conducted school of
journalism, with the added advantage of
not acquiring It at the expense of some
newspaper. But until the novice had had
considerable experience in a newspaper
office he would not be a newspaper man
of great value, Just as the law student
Is no lawyer, the medical student no doc
tor, the theological student no minister,
and the West Point cadet no soldier until
he has practiced his profession.
v
General Sherman' Friend.
Llpplncott's Magazine.
"Upon a certain occasion General Sher
man was the guest of honor at? a banquet,
after which a reception was held. Among
the line of people who filed In and out to
shake hands with the great war hero,
General Sherman perceived a face that
was very familiar, but which he could not
place. '
"Who are you?" he asked in an apolo
getic aside, as he welcomed the guest
heartily.
The man blushed and murmured behind
a deprecatory hand:
"Made your shirts, sir."
"Ah, of course," exclaimed the General,
loudly, 'turning to the receiving commit
tee behind him. "Gentlemen, allow me to
present Major Shurtz."
Drinking- and Progress.
St James Gazette.
The teetotal races are sinking moro
and more into subjection. Now, as ever.
It is the drinking people that lead the
progress of humanltjv The Jews drank
and gave us monotheism. The Greeks
drank and gave us art and literature.
The Romans drank and gave us law.
The Teuton drank and- gave us liberty.(
Britain has drunk (not always wisely)
and established commerce. What have
the teetotal races done for tho better
ment of the world?
Irish Tobacco. I
Pilgrim.
Mr. Joseph Chamberlain's attitude against
free trade has set Ireland ablaze wlah en
thusiasm, and the "bhoys" (are fully convinced
that a new era Is dawning for that "distressful
country." Protection la to shut out the to
baccos of America and Cuba, and the weed for
British consumption is to be grown on the
Emerald Isle. As a proof of what Irish bogs
can do.ln the way of giving forth fine tobacco,
all London has been deluged with cigars from
Erin, and the British lawmakers are con
fronted at every turn bj bunches of twist In
the hands of enthusiastic Celts. This character
istically Irish move has afforded the free-trade
papers of London many a laugh, and among
other clever things written about It was the
following parody:
Ob, Paddy, dear, an' did you hear the news
that's going 'round.
How hand and flst with Irish twist the empire
will be bound?
Full-flavored flake and prime hard cake we'll
grow on College Green,
And every soul will smoke our roll In Ireland's
short dhudeen.
I met with Napper Tandy, and I took him by
the hand,
"Now, did ye try the weed," says I, "the weed
of Irish brand?"
He smiled the most distressful smile, that ever
yet was seen.
And I noticed his complexion was a-wearlng
of the green.
"And did ye smoke it all," says I, "with relish
to the end?"
"Not quite," says he and looked at me; "I
met a dear old friend, ,
Say's I. 'Just try this baccy, and he filled hi3
black dhudeen.
And his face Is 'round th corner now a-wear-
ing of the green-"
JiOTE AND COMMENT. r
The Proposal; Proper Doleful Comedy
(On the some day girls In San Francisco
and Butte were killed by rejected lovers.)
Scene The parlor of a house, anywhere.
Time 10:30 P. M., any evening. V
Characters Mae Anything: Hlldebrand Any
One; a phonograph.
(Enter Mae.)
Mae Hlldebrand will be here In a moment.
(Turns down the gas.) I think he may propose
tonight. I wonder If I like him well enough
to marry him. He's as handsome as any one
I ever seen, but he's so awful stingy. Guess
I'll have to refuse him. so I better be ready.
(Hides a pistol In her bosom.) Ah. here he
comes. (Enter Hlldebrand.)
Hll. Darling!
Mae (aside) I hope the gun works all right.
(Aloud.) Yes. Hlldebrand.
Phonograph (In deep tones) Don't forget to
lock the door. Mae.
Hit I'll smash your old man's phonograph If
he don't forget to wind It. I want to tell you
something-, Mae. (They sit side by each on
sofa.)
Mao Just-you-take-your-arm-away-rlght-
now.
HH. How hard-hearted you are.
Mae That's not my heart, that's the g
H II. Don't you
Phon. Gas bill last month, $15.83.
HH. (running for poker) I'll smash that
damned contraption. .
Mae I cannot love a man that uses such
language. .
H1I. (brandishing poker) Tou re-fu-s-s-se met
Mae (drawing gun) Yes.
HI!. Then
Phon. Has he gone?
(Bang, bang, bang.)
Mae (ailde) I anticipated him. (Ringing tele
phone bell.) Gimme the undertaker's.
(Curtain.)
Sensible Man.
Grant Rathbun has sold out and intends go
ing to Oregon: he says he can get a living
there. Isanti (Minn.) Press.
Cement does not always unite.
The "White Swan" is a "soiled dove."
Mr. Root Is not an underground speaker.
The Oriental pot has ceased boiling
over.
The Postofflcd1 leaves its old stamping
ground.
Every dog has its bad day even the
Sheriff's.
You can't naturalize a Bohemian, says
an observer. r
The sale of lottery tickets is gambling.
(This is official.)
There are no "bounders" on the Boun
dary Commission.
Even Hark Twain can see nothing
humorous In Tammany.
Having killed seven other Indians, Little
Plume Is In high feather.
There Is no political significance In the
army maneuvers at Fort Rlley.
Betrothals are much like engagements
after all. Both are easily broken.
It remained ?br sceptical Colfax to dis
cover that Dirty Dora doesn't eat mud.
Whatever Dowle may do In Now York,
he Is not likely to buy any gold bricks.
Our rubber Imports are Increasing. Our
success makes all the other nations stare.
Locomotive engineers In Montana have
better chances of flying than Langley has.
We now have a machine for grading
prunes, but must eat them In the same
old way.
Some rulers change their attitude as
often as they do their uniforms, and with
less effect
Judging from the myrlad3 of outbursts
in the Eastern papers, frost is not found
anywhere but "on the pumpkin."
It Is bad news that the Filipinos have
collected 17,000,000 pounds of locusts. Better
they were hungry, so that they would
work.
Some Eastern jurors are being con
demned for deciding a verdict by flipping
nickels. Are we to believe that they used
double-headed coins?
Speaking of undigested securities, tho
"dummy director" resembles the vermiform
appendix In that he is of no use to anyone
but the financial surgeons. ;
The dear Dowager Empress of China
was anxious about the foundations of the
British Legation, so she had some dyna
mite put In to counteract any possible
sinking tendency.
When we are told that a boy of 14 was
so excited by a theatrical performance In
Springfield, O., that he went home and
shot 'three persons before killing himself,
we are naturally anxious to learn the
name of the play, for we know It couldn't
have been "Reuben In New York." That
was here at the time.
Oh, the tender hearts of Oregon City
peoplel A handsome woman strikes the
burg. She has a picture that looks like
the side of a barn painted on a rainy day.
She would raffle It off for enough to buy a
railway ticket to Salem. Kind hearts to
the number of 150 buy tickets to tho
amount of $113. The handsome woman
departs, and the winner has topay some
one to keep the picture in his barn.
WEX. J. '
PLEASANTRIES OK PARAGRAPHEIIS
Jaggles I euppose bric-a-brac is often sold
for Junk? "Waggles Not nearly so often as
junk Is sold for brlc-a-brac Judge.
"Many a man." said Uncle Eben, "Is so busy
tellln what he'd do If he had de chance, dat
he doesn take notice of de chance when It
comes along." Washington Star.
Humble Admirer Are the characters In
your book drawn from real life? Haughty
Author Did you ever see such Interesting
people In real life as my characters? Som
ervllle Journal.
Nellie Oh, these hard words! Pa, what Is
an antithesis? Pa It Is the contrast of ex
tremes; for Instance, your mother has put the
"God Bless Our Home" motto right over the
piano. Boston Transcript.
Singleton Your wife looks worried, old man.
"What's the trouble? Wederly Oh, she was
worried about something or other last night
and this morning she can't remember what
It was. That's what Is worrying her now.
Chicago News.
"At what age do you consider women the
moat charming?" asked the Inquisitive female
of more or less uncertain years. "The age of
the woman who asks tho question," answered
the man, who was a diplomat from Diplomacy
vllle. Chicago News.
"My husband doesn't gamble now as he
used to." "Reformed, has he?" "Yes, he
doesn't go to the track at all any more. His
worst dissipation now Is swimming, I think.
At any rate, he says he only goes to the
poolrooms." Philadelphia Press.
They were trying to teaso the girl with the
umbrageous pompadour concerning the newest
young man. "What's his politics?" they asked
her. "Sort of FusIonUt. Isn't he?" "No," she
said. "Mlddle-of-the-Road Pop. "We were tak
ing a buggy ride when he proposed." Chicago
Tribune.
"Now, my slster-In-Iaw," said the stranger,4
"has led more women to become regular at
tendants at church than" "You don't tell
me!" exclaimed the Rev. Mr. Priestley. "So
she Is an evangelist?" "No; but she's the
roost fashionable milliner la town." Philadel
phia Press