THE MORNING OKEGONIAN. THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 26, 1903.
Entered at the PostoSlce at Portland. Ortron,
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TODAY'S WEATHER Fair, with northerly
winds.
YESTERDAY'S WEATHER Maximum tem
perature. 56; minimum temperature, 44: pre
cipitation, none. ,
PORTLAND, TIIURSDAT, FEB. 28-
IIOPEFUL BUSINESS OUTLOOK.
The turn of the year has come and
gone without serious financial disturb
ance, and Spring trade is upon ua with
every assurance of healthy and pros
perous trade. The premonitions of dis
aster betokened by the iron trade in
December have changed Into signs of
encouragement.- The situation seems to
be simply that with all our equipment
busy we are unable to keep pace with
the home demand, but must eke out
domestic production with heavy Im
ports from abroad. The bugbear of the
Iron trade la overproduction, and of thfo
there is apparently no approach. The
strength of our consuming power is
shown in the ease with which the coun
try carries the burden of Us labor
troubles.
In the financial world two or three
conserving agencies stand out in most
Impressive relief. The first of these Is
the array of powerful Interests in an
tagonism to every sort of disturbance
not only disastrous competition, but
stock and money panics, currency dis
location and industrial congestion. Or
ganization has doubtless been pushed to
an extreme In many directions; but the
fact remains that the close touch into
which our great aggregations of cap
ital have come and the co-operation
which the magnitude of our business life
has forced upon the managers of pri
vate and public finance are powerfully
operating toward the exclusion of panic
conditions. Every great interest touches
all other great interests at fo many
points that interdependence and inter
action have become axioms which no
cautious operator Is going to disregard.
Another reassuring element In the sit
uation, which we have never seen al
luded to, relates to the dangers of over
capitalization. Herein lies, In fact, the
acknowledged great danger that im
pends over both the railroad and the
Industrial Investment worlds. Corpora
tions of all sorts are doing business on
Inflated capital, and the only" question
In many minds has been as to when the
enforced and painful liquidation of these
overvalued properties will occur. Ex
pedients for warding off liquidation
have been regarded as only deferring
the day of the Inevitable.
But the thought we wish to suggest
is that the growth of population and
business, together with advancing
prices, may In time bring about a veri
fication of these stocks and bonds In
real values. It was a question six years
ago whether new gold discoveries would
put us on some such advancing move
ment of higher prices as followed the
California activities of 1S49. But that
question has been satisfactorily an
swered to many minds by the course
of prices, not so much of highly finished
products, wjiich a stable money stand
ard and inventions -have cheapened, but
of materials Into which little has en
tered but crude human labor. Every
thing that is torn from the earth" or
water by the humble laborer or the
simplest tools has increased notably In
value since 1896 such as ore, .lumber,
fish, meat and farm products. Gold Is
cheaper, everything else Is "higher.
Now it Is a perfectly natural outcome
of thesi advancing prices, ccupled with
financial confidence, that the actual
value of Investment securities, railroad
and Industrial, should go on Increasing.
Rates cf traffic are advancing. Iron
t'nd steel are going up. Xook at the Im
provement In the prices of our great
staple cropa Coal, probably, will nevtr
again be as cheap as it was a year ago.
These increasing prices, with presuma
bly Improved profits, can have but one
permanent effect, and. that Is the ap
preciation of the securities of the cor
porations concerned. The nearer these
securities approach to par the more has
the water .In their original composition
been squeezed out to be substituted by
actual value. Forced liquidation such
as we had in 1893-7 is not the only way
In which watered shocks can be put on
a, safe basis. Prosperity and wise man
agement will do it. If permitted to op-
crate continuously throughout a lon'g
term of years. The conservative man
agement that Is so conspicuous in all
lines of, finance and trade is a most
hopeful augury of uninterrupted peace
and profit. Earnings go-to rejuvenation
of plants and betterments of roadbed
and rolling stock.
If these favorable conditions continue.
no section of the country will reap
greater benefits from them than the Pa
cific Coast "When we consider the re
sources of this region In minerals, soil,
range, timber and fish, and Its resource
of water transportation, the great
strides It Trill take; before Teaching the
same stage of development that now
prevails la the Inland states Mat of
Itocky Mountains are apparent. Judged
"by the country's resources and Its con
venience to the markets of the world-.
Oregon should have 1,000,000 people, the
same as Nebraska, and Portland a pop
ulation of 200,000, that of Minneapolis.
Measured by Its capabilities and advan
tages, the Pacific Northwest is too far
behind the rest of the country. Now
It Is getting ready to catch up. Watch
us grow!
A VISION OP DIPLOMACY.
It Is perhaps as well that the Houso
has thrown the so-called International
silver commission out of the Philippine
currency bill, where It does not tech
nically belong; and. Inasmuch as the
Senate has now Introduced it in the
r-form of an amendment to the sundry
civil bill. It is certainly to be hoped
that the House will not carry its hostil
ity to the point of non-concurrence when
the bill comes back from the Senate.
The persistence with which the House
has Impeded this admirable project of
the President and Secretary Hay Is yet
to be explained upon any satisfactory
ground. If It forms part of the move
ment that so seriously menaced the Sen
ate's plan for Philippine currency, it
can only add to the discredit the coin
age committee of the House has already
incurred. Inasmuch as a subcommittee
of this same coinage committee has ap
parently acceded to the President's de
sires at the "White House conference,
acquiescence may be reasonably looked
for.
The enterprise of helping China and
Mexico to stabilize their fluctuating
currency is worthy the highest diplo
macy, and it la depressing to see the
apparent Inability of Congress to rise
to Its level. If It should fall. It will
add another to the list of exalted un
dertakings of world-wide benefit and
significance In whose achievement Sec
retary Hay has been balked by the in
capacity of small minds In either Senate
or House. It is doubtful If any other
single thing would contribute so pow
erfully to stimulation of international
trade as the successful establishment of
a permanent par of exchange between
the currencies of gold and of silver
countries. The creation of a stable ex
change would remove one of the chief
causes of friction which retards trade
between the gold and Gilver countries.
How Important this consideration has
always been may be Judged from the
long and earnest, though misdirected,
efforts of "blmetalists" to terminate the
fluctuations of exchange through the
combined use of gold and silver under
the free-coinage system in all countries.
We have already set out In some
detail the difficulties and losses which
move China and Mexico In asking our
co-operation In the effort to stabilize
their currencies. It is necessary also to
consider the benefits which would ac
crue to ourselves along with other gold
standard nations. In the. first place,
stability of the money standard could
not fall to enhance the safety and profit
of China and Mexico, and doubtless in
time also of 'Central and South America,
as fields for the Investment of capital.
The absence of a stable currency has
not prevented the Investment of more
than $500,000,000 of American capital in
.Mexico and several hundred millions of-
English, French, German and Belgian
capital In Africa and the countries of
Asia. There can be no doubt, however.
that the inducement for such invest
ments would be greatly Increased If the
investor felt, certain that his dividends
would be paid without deduction In the
gold money in which he made his In
vestment. Russia attracted foreign
capital by hundreds of millions when
she adopted the gold standard In 1S97.
Japan has had a similar experience,
though to leas extent. It would not be
surprising if the demand for capital in
China and other undeveloped countries
would be so enlarged by the adoption of
a fixed standard, and the resulting
stimulus to railway building and the In
troduction of modern machinery, that
the world would never witness within
the lives of the present generation an
other period of seriously congested cap
ital and low earnings for money. It
was undoubtedly this congestion of cap
ital blindly seeking outlets which dur
ing the last decade, as Mr. C A. Conant
has ably shown In his books and maga
zine articles, put the spurs to the spirit
of colonial acquisition in England,
France, Germany, Belgium and even in
the United States, and led the European
powers to dream of the partition of
China. If an outlet Is afforded for their
capital without such efforts, much will
be done to Insure stable conditions In
Industry and to prevent political agita
tion in these countries for new colonial
conquests.
"Along with these desires for cafe fields
of profitable Investment, the gold-standard
nations are looking for new markets
for manufactured goods. And secure
civilization of many wants waits upon
financial stability as well as upon firm
police administration. If China alone
should raise her importations of fin
ished goods in some such degree as
Japan, where- they have increased
within a short period to $3 per capita,
the increased demand made by China
upon the manufacturing countries
would represent a thousand millions, of
dollars. Such a demand upon the fac
tories of Europe and the United States
would not only absorb their surplus
product as If by magic, but would so
mitigate the competition of these coun
tries among themselves that the polit
ical as well as the economic attitude' of
the civilized nations toward each other
might undergo a marvelous change.
There would no longer be the fear that
one cation would unload her surplus
of manufactured goods at less than cost
upon lier neighbors; there would no
longer be the fierce striving for higher
I tariffs on the one hand and for bringing
more dependencies on the other hand
within the circle of the domestic market-International
money conferences are
deservedly in ill repute; but this one
would strike out for Itself a new and
honorable path In taking for Its object
no such idle dreams as double standards
and an Impossible par of exchange be
tween gold-standard and free-coinage
currencies, hut the honest enterprise of
helping the great silver-standard coun
tries to reach the solid ground of the
gold standard through such readjust
ment of their coinage systems as may
be found within their reach. When we
consider that China and Mexico have
themselves applied to us for assistance
In their .need, the ungraciousness of our
failure to comply would be too patent
for argument. Self-interest as well as
amity calls upon us for prompt and
generous aid; .
A bill is before the Maine Legislature
providing for the taxation of non-resi
dent hunters in the state. Under the
pending .bill It. is proposed to make
every non-reeddent par tne sum of $25
for a license to bunt bull moosedeer
and game birds; a license to hunt deer
and game birds costs 10, and a license
to hunt game birds costs $5, The Maine
Legislature has hitherto appropriated
$25,000 annually for the work of the
Fish and Game Commission, "but only
$2000 of this has gone to the protection
of game. Much game has been killed
out of season, especially deer, and there
is much poaching, especially among the
moose on the Canadian border. The
open season on deer Is from October 1
to December 1, and on moose from Oc
tober 15 to December 1, during which
time each sportsman is allowed to kill
two deer and one bull moose. Non-resident
sportsmen pay a license fee of J10
in Wyoming, and West Virginia, Penn
sylvania, Florida and New Jersey de
mand J10 for a hunter's license, and In
all but twenty states and In every Cana
dian province the hunter is taxed to
some extent. A high license has made
the Adlrondacks, Quebec and New
Brunswick a rich man's hunting
ground, and the proposed law will do
the same for Maine.
A FAKER ORATOR.
George IV, when Prince Regent, was
wont when In his cups to dwell upon the
distinguished part taken at Waterloo
by a famous regiment of which, as
Prince of Wales, he was the titular
Colonel, and finally he went bo far as to
pretend that he was himself personally
present on this memorable occasion.
Court etiquette did not permit the state
ment of the royal fabulist to be contra
dicted, so that he was safe from expos
ure. It would have been fortunate for
United States Senator Depew if, in mak
ing his recent speech describing the last
days of Horace Greeley, he had been as
safe from being brought to book as was
George IV, but while Kings may lie
fearlessly in the presence of an assem
bly of obsequious courtiers, tho privi
leges of the United States Senate do not
Include immunity from historical criti
cism, and Whitelaw Reid, in the New
York Tribune, has handled Mr. Depew's
most recent oratorical fable without
mercy. In his eulogy of the late Con
gressman Cummlngs Mr. Depew said
that at the close of the campaign of
1872, Mr. Greeley, after making his last
political speech, took Depew with him
to his home, and, looking over Nast's
caricatures representing him as the em
bodiment of all that was evil or vile,
said:
"My life Is a failure. I never have sought to
accumulate a fortune. I never have cared for
fame, but I did want to leave a monument of
what I had done for my fellow-men. In lifting
them up and In doing away with the curse of
slavery and the curse of rum, but here I am.
at the close of this campaign, so represented to
my countrymen that the slave will always look
upon me as bavins been one of his owners, and
reform will look upon me as a fraud."
Then, his head falling upon his desk, he broke
Into uncontrollable sobs. I sent for his family.
The brain that had done such splendid work
snapped. The next morning he was taken to
an asylum, where he died. His heart literally
broke.
This is the story of Mr. Depew's per
sonal recollections of the last sane hours
of Mr. Greeley's life. Editor Whitelaw
Reld now rises up in the Tribune and
says that Mr. Depew's narrative Is an
utter fake. Mr. Greeley made his last
speech on Saturday, October 12, 1S72, at
Pleasantvllle, near his own home. Mrs.
Qreeley, who had long been ill, at that
time became much worse, and Mr.
Greeley refused to take any further
part In the campaign and remained with
his wife until her death, October 30.
The story of Mr. Greeley's confession of
.failure, his sobs, his broken heart, -the
sending for the famtljvthe snapping of
the brain and the removal to an asy
lum the next morning. Is, says Mr.
Whitelaw Reld, nothing but a "touch
ing fable" woven out of whole cloth by
the golden-mouthed Depew. In a signed
communication written the day after
the election, Mr. Greeley resumed the
editorship of the Tribune in full posses
sion of his mental faculties, wrote and
published several articles In the course
of the next few days, but after Novem
ber 12 gradually yielded to exhaustion,
due to his sleepless vigil at his wife's
bedside, at the end of a hard campaign,
and died November 29, more than six
weeks after he made his last spoech at
Pleasantvllle, where Mr. Depew also
spoke. Greeley got off at Williams
bridge after this speech, while Mr. De
pew went alone to New York. The "life
is a failure" speech was never uttered;
the scene In the study, the caricatures,
sobs, etc, are nothing but pure Inven
tion on part of Chauncey Depew.
There Is nothing Incredible in this to
anybody who lias ever read Depew's
speeches delivered on large or small oc
casions. His "historical orations" are
full of gross blunders of fact that an In
telligent schoolboy of 16 could not make
without disgrace. His oration on Lin
coln is utterly shallow and Inadequate
to the rea stature of the man. For
years the New York Evening Post and
papers of kindred reputation for his
torical scholarship and accurate polit
ical knowledge have Bpoken of Mr. De
pew with contempt or compassion as
utterly unfit for any serious public func
tion. His political speeches are a mass
of stale anecdotes, his "historical ora
tions" full of blunders and blatherskite.
He began life as a railroad lobbyist,
and In politics he has never risen above
the tactics of a lobbyist; he' Is a large,
good-looking man, with fine voice; he
has plenty of "meat-ax" humor; he has
no convictions; -he praises everybody
and blames nobody; he Is utterly with
out any sense of literary or historical
proportion.
To Depew "Boss Piatt" is a states
man. If he Is the honored guest, and so
Is Secretary Hay, so Is McKlnley. so Is
Roosevelt, bo Is everybody when Depew
wields the whitewashing brush or kisses
the "blarney stone at a large or small
occasion. That such a political quack
should be invited to take the measure
of such giants In American public life
as Washington, Hamilton and Lincoln
is one of the most inexplicable facts of
our time. Without any pretension to
accurate political knowledge or histor
ical scholarship, without any reputation
for statesmanlike abilities, without any
sense of literary discrimination or
power of literary expression, without
any master' of the facts or philosophy
of modern history, Mr. Depew" for
twenty-five years has been a popular
peripatetic orator. He went to the last
New York Republican State Convention
with his speech In his pocket for a man
who was not nominated, but It was Just
as good for the successful candidate, for
the Depew stock, speech Is always avail
able; It, is the same perfunctory speech,
drenched In whitewash, studded with
sickening compliments, Instinct with the
ammonlacal odor of ancient and flshllke
anecdotes.
Not only members of the W. C. T. U.,
but persons generally who reverence the
memory- of a good woman who was
faithful to her ideals and principles will
be glad, to learn upon the authority of
Colonel Bingham, Superintendent of Pub-
I ua Buildings ana Grounds in. Washing
ton, that the story of the purchase by
a saloon-keeper of the temperance side
board that was given to Mrs. Lucy
Webb Hayes when she was mistress of
the White House Is without foundation
in fact. The story was started, by
whom no one seems to know, and. was
told with a fidelity to dates and details
that left no doubt of its truth. It was
widely published, and every one con
nected with the alleged transfer of the
sideboard active and passive was cen
sured for dereliction of duty. Much
righteouslndlgnation-was aroused, some
sympathetic teats were shed, and many
columns of comment upon the matter
were written and printed. It now
transpires that all of this sentiment was
wasted and all the censure misplaced.
The Incident goes to prove that Ananias
and Sapphira were not in It when it
comes to plain, unvarnished lying of the
type indulged by the modern news
monger of sensational bent or advertis
ing acumen.
The Rev. Dr. J. L. M. Curry, who died
recently in Asheville. N. C In his 78th
year, was a man of excellent ability,
who filled many honorable positions in
public life with great credit to him
self. He was born In Georgia in June,
1825; removed to Alabama in 183S; was
educated at the University of Georgia
and at the Harvard law school. He
served In the Texas Rangers during the
Mexican War, and In the United States
House of Representatives as a States
Rights Democrat from December, 1857,
to January 21, 1661. when he resigned
because of the impending secession of
Alabama. He was a member of the first
Confederate Congress, and In 1864-65
served In the Confederate army under
General Joseph E. Johnston as Lieutenant-Colonel
of Cavalry. At the close of
the war he was ordained a clergyman
of the Baptist church; was president
of Howard College, Alabama, In 1866-68.
and professor of English, philosophy and
constitutional law In Richmond College,
Virginia, In 1S68-8L He labored for the
public school education for all the peo
ple of both races. In 1885 President
Cleveland appointed Dr. Curry Minister
to Spain. Dr. Curry was one of the
most effective platform speakers In the
country.
Danger of exhaustion of our .coal supT
ply Continues to be agitated. In a re
cent work upon the anthracite industry
by Dr. Peter Roberts, the writer cites
the estimates of three of the most emi
nent experts. The lowest estimate on
tons -yet to be mined Is 4.832,6S5,668, the
highest 6,512,167,703; the lowest estimate
of years duration, 80.54;. tho highest,
108.53. These estimates are made upon,
the assumption that production and
consumption do not exceed 60,000,000
tons annually, but the Chicago Tribune
suggests that as the prospects are that
before long that limit will be far ex
ceeded, it is clear that In less than a
century there will be no more hard coal
to quarrel over unless large deposits are
found outside of Pennsylvania, of which
at present there are no indications, ex
cept in Colorado. There are those now
living who may see the last lump of an
thracite produced In Pennsylvania. Peo
ple will then be reduced to bituminous
coal, and must discover new ways of
using It In the Interests of cooking,
cleanliness and health.
' Our War College cannot afford to for
get the conclusions reached by Dr.
Conan Doyle in "The Boer War" regard
ing the essentials of modern. soldiership
for the future. Among other things, Dr.
Doyle said:
Better shooting, better knowledge of cover,
are the main desiderata In our Infantry. If a
man Is not a marksman he should be cast from
the army. The officer will carry a rule, like
his men. Never again should valuable lives be
exposed "by the fatuous Idea of giving them a
different dress. .
Doyle lays emphasis upon the English
need of rapid-fire guns and of the heavy
howitzers; and upon the conversion of
the cavalry, with its antiquated lances
and swords. Into a mounted Infantry
armed with magazine rifles. The Boer
taught Europe how to shoot, how to
take cover and how to make cover
quickly against artillery Are. Individ
ual .excellence In marksmanship, highly
trained field artillery and the rapid
movement of vast clouds of mounted
riflemen would make an American array
that would make the invasion of this
country a failure.
Tho contemplated extension of the
Northern Pacific Railway along the
north bank of the Columbia from Ka
iama eastward Into the great wheat
producing, etockgrowlng Interior is dis
closed by the bill of Representative
Jones asking the right of way through
the Government military reserve at Fort
Vancouver. Preliminary surveys have
shown that the proposed route Is prac
ticable, and. Indeed, that it offers few
serious obstacles, comparatively speak
ing, to railroad construction. The Gov
ernment is slow to relinquish or divide
military reservation rights, and upon
this fact many orchardlsts and others
along the river, who object to the In
vasion of their cultivated lands by the
railroad, base their hopes that the pre
liminary survey that has been made re
cently will develop into nothing beyond
the placing of grade stakes.
William J. Bryan, in his recent ad
dress to the New York Press Club, said
among other things: "A little country
weekly has as much Influence as a great
city daily. No paper can make a bad
man good. Nor can a paper make a
good man bad. Don't think, you men
who make the city dailies, that you cre
ate all the Ideas of this country. Out'
in the little hamlets men on small sal
aries are helping to make this Nation
what It ought to be." This is true, and
It is a pity It is true. The free silver at
16 to 1 fallacy owed Its chief support
and dissemination to the little country
weeklies that accepted Richard P.
Bland and William J. Bryan as oracles
In finance.
Representative Jones, of Washington,
has done valiant service for good gov
ernment In leading the assault In the
House upon the pernicious ship subsidy
bill. His numerous amendments were
very effective In showing up the Heed
lessness of this proposed raid upon the
Treasury, and also the manner in which
the measure as drawn Is calculated to
play Into the hands of the great ship
ping trusts. It was a good day for hon
est government In this country and for
the Republican party when Mr. Jones
succeeded In putting the bill to sleep
In the committee on merchant marine
and fisheries.
Oregon hens are on duty and eggs
abound at last which the dealer can
assure you are "fresh ranch eggs"
without laying perjury upon his souL
Columbia River smelt are brought in
dally by the ton and retailed In the mar
kets at 5 cents a pound. Lent may be
said, therefore, -to have come In under
auspices most favorable to the- faitafuL
RUSSIA'S GRAND OLD MAN
J-
Chicago Inter Ocean.
When It'is considered that the little In
formation which finds its way into the
Russian newspapers is subject in advance
to the rigid scrutiny of government cen
sors, more than usual credence must be
granted an Item which comes from Tomsk.
The item has to do with a resident of
that city who Is said to be 200 years old.
The Russian newspapers have been per
mitted to eay this and to add that the an
nouncement is supported by documents.
Thoy allege that this man. though bed
ridden, is mentally sound, and that he re
members seeing Peter the Great.
By the side of this antique personage,
of course, the last surviving body servant
of Andrew Jackson can be considered
only in the light of a thoughtless and in
experienced youth, for the elderly Rus
sian gentleman of Tomsk was an old man
when Andrew Jackson was born. He
must have been an Interested, observer
of the reign of the terrible Catherine,
and. Judged by his present mental condi
tion, he probably followed with Intelli
gence the careers of the great Frederick
and the great Napoleon from beginning
to finish.
k He was a haia and hearty old man when
the American colonists rose in revolt
against the mother country and estab
lished the greatest Republic the world has
ever known; when Canton. Robespierre
and the guillotine ruled Paris; when tho
Corsican adventurer poured grnpeshot
ruthlessly into the champions, of liberty,
equality and fraternity; when the bells
of burning Moscow sounded the death
knell of tho grand army. To him Auster
lltz, Lelpslc Waterloo are affairs only of
yesterday. Ho was well over 100 years old
before Chicago was founded. He had be
gun to lose his teeth before Fernando
Jones reminiscences began.
Although tho earlier years of his life
say the first 115.. years or so were not
altogether free from painful episodes in
the world's history, yet he 'must now re
call them with pleasurable emotions as
years In which there wero no railroads,
no telegraph wires, no telephones, no sew
ing machines, no historical novels, no
ocean greyhounds, no ragtime melodies, no
trusts, no devil wagons, no coon songs, no
breakfast foods, no 10-cent magazines, no
indeterminate franchise, no germ theory,
no grip, no appendicitis, and no Geneva
tribunal.
And yet his life was saddened by events
which prove that he has not been immune
from the common griefs of mankind. He
lost his wife 125 years ago, and it speaks
well for his fidelity to the early partner
of his Joys and sorrows that, while he
has probably during the last century and
a quarter been sorely tempted at times,
hp has never given his heart to another.
His life, we take It. has been devoted to
the memory dt the woman who was
snatched from his side about the year
177S. and to that of his dear and only
boy, who died prematurely in 1S21, at the
age of 90.
Who Wan This, PrnyT
Chicago Tribune.
There is a young woman now having her
voice trained in New York who may be ex-'
pected shortly to burst upon the world as
a prima donna under the stage name of
Elsie Corcoran.
While the Bostonlans were traveling on
the Pacific Coast recently a telegram
came from a prominent man in Portland,
Or., asking If they would not give a hear
ing to a young woman of the state who
had what seemed to local poeple a won
derful voice. A favorable answer was re
turned and she was told to meet the train
at a railroad Junction some distance from
Portland, where the train stopped for half
an hour at 5:30 o'clock in the morning.
The train pulled Into the Junction at the
appointed time. It was barely dawn. Mr.
Barnabee had been dragged from his berth
at that unearthly hour, and was ready
when the train stopped. There on the
platform stood the girl.
"But, my dear," said the paternal Bar
nabee, "I don't see how I can try your
voice here. There's no piano within 20
miles."
"I'll sing for you without any accom
paniment." said the girl. "The station
agent says we can use his office as a
studio."
So the young singer and the veteran
went into the ramshackle little wooden
station, and without anything to Inspire
her the girl lifted up her voice and sang.
"If you'll go to New York and study for
a year or two.y said Barnabee. "I don't
see why you shouldn't do about what you
please in the way of singing."
The girl went, and therefore Elsie. Cor
coran Is a name to remember and look out
for in the future.
The Fall of Henderson.
Sioux City Tribune.
The setting sun of David B. Henderson's
political career shines not with the clear
and wholesome radiance which would tell
of duties well done and service nobly ren
dered. It shines dimly through a fog of
suspicion and distrust. David B. Hender
son has listened to the song of the, siren
whose accompaniment is played on a
golden harp. He has not had the stamina
to resist temptations to use his great po
sition for personal advantage. He has
been too weak to carry the responsibili
ties of public service. Never strong, in In.
tellectual endowment, he has shown him
self sadly deficient' in moral fiber. He has
discredited himself, betrayed the senti
ment of his district and state, and abused
the confidence of his constituents. He will
only save himself from the humiliating
realization of bow great has been his fall
if he adheres to his announced determina
tion not to return to Iowa to live.
A Waste of Mental Activity.
Baltimore American.
One of the questions about which some
people are worrying Just now Is whether
John D. Rockefeller. Jr., Is eligible to
.heaven. As the problem presents some
difficulties, owing to various interpreta
tions of the entrance conditions, to say
nothing of tho world's inability ever to
learn how It comes out until too late for
any of us to profit by It, why not quit
worrying about It and turn all that sur
plus mental activity Into more practical
channels?
Not Worrylnir About, Old Trusts.
Atlanta Journal.
It has been demonstrated that combines
"trusts," as we now call them have ex
isted since 2000 years before Christ. But,
naturally, we are not worrying about the
"B. C." combines. It's those that are on
our chest right now that we want to
shako, off. v
A Bootless Rivalry.
Philadelphia Record.
"What is the use of increasing our Naw
till It shall be as large as that of Ger
many. If Germany will not stand still.
but is bound to havo a bigger navy than
we navei ts every nation to nave a big.
ger navy than any other nation?
Great Avoirdupois -ot Essential.
Memphis Commercial-Appeal.
While Judge Alton B. Parker Is regarded
as a good man. the objection is made to
him that he does not weigh 200 pounds.
Still, we do not think It is absolutely nec
essary that our Presidential candidate
should be Shattered.
Will Not Hustle for It.
Louisville Times.
Judge Alton B. Parker does not now
hold, as David B. Hill did a few years
ago, that the best way to get tho Presi
dency is to go out and hustle for It. .
In the Thlngless Age.
Chicago Inter Ocean.
The coatless man throws a careless ana
Round the -waist of the hatless girl.
As over the dustless and mudleas road
In a horseless carriage they whirl.
Although for lunch his colnless purse
For them affords no means.
Save a tasteless meal of boneless cod
By the side of strtngless beans,
Tet he Ugbts a tobaccoleas cigarette
And laughs a, mirthless laugh.
While her father tries to call her back
By wireless telegraph,
STORIES ABOUT PEOPLE.
Evidence of Falling Mind.
Washington Post,
Apropos of the recent adoption in Ver
mont of the high-license law. Representa
tive Foster, of that state, tells an anec
dote about an old farmer who never had
an ache or a pain, but who, nevertheless.
thought he ought to have a doctor, be
cause he had never had one.
Tho Interview was to the point, the
farmer asserting thit he could eat as far
as he could see on both sides of tho table.
and that he slept so well he didn't get up
till It was time to do tho milking.
"You are in perfect health," mid the
doctor to the farmer, after making a
physical examination, "but you aro In the
decline of life nd perhaps you ought to
tako a tonic, something like a little ry
whisky."
"Oh," said the farmer. "I could never
do that. I havo a son, and that would
never do."
"Who ts your barber?" queried the doc
tor. "I shave myself." replied the farmer.
"Well." rejoined the doctor, "couldn't
you have a bottlo In your room and tike
the tonic whenever you, shave?"
This was agreed to, and It was some
time before tho doctor one day met the
farmer's son and Inquired about the pa.
tlent.
"Ho Is getting along very nicely," said
the young man. "He Is more active than
ever, but ho Is losing his mind."
"Losing his mind!" excUlmid the doc
tor in surprise. "What Is the evidence
of itr
"Well," said the young man, "he in
sists on shaving himself six times a
day."
Not Up to the Racket. '
Detroit Free Press.
"I was In London a few years ago with
a Northern Michigan resident." said a De
troiter the other day. "and we had many
a laugh over the English fop and masher
as he minced his way up and down Picca
dilly of an evening. At length my friend,
whose years had not given him any se
dateness, rigged nimself out as a parader.
He had the clothes, the hat, the cane, the
eyeglass, and tho kangaroo gair, and off
he went. I could see nothing lacking In
"Cholly, but there must have been some
thing wrong, as he had not gone far
when a policeman stopped him and said:
" 'Come, now, but you must let up on
this."'
" 'SoT drawled my friend as he looked
Bobby up and down.
" 'Yes, you'd better get off.'
" 'But why should I, ye knowr
" 'Because you are making yourself a
hobject of ridicule, and ridicule is next to
misdemeanor.
" If I am a hobject of ridicule, then
what do you say of that thing?" asked my
friend, as he pointed to a masher ahead
of him.
" "That7 Why, he's no hobject of ridi
cule.' " "What Is he a hobject otr
" 'He's the hobject of the son of a
Lord, and worth 20,000 a year, and if
you don't get hoff the street In five min
utes my hobject will bo to take you in.' "
DuOalo Bill's Indians Tried Tabasco.
Pittsburg Gazette.
Buffalo Bill, who Is going to put up a
big hotel in the West, says that one day
in New York he entertained two Indian
chiefs at dinner in the Hoffman Houso
cafe.
There wis a little bottle of tabasco
sauce on the table, and the first chief
covered his oysters with it, as though it
had been catsup. Then he swallowed an
oyster, going through strange contortions
In the act. though he was too polite to
make any outcry. His air, though, be
came sad, and big tears coursed down his
cheeks.
"Why, brother, do you weep?" the other
chief asked, sympathetically.
"I am thinking," said the first, "of my
son. Gray Wolf, who was slain in bat
tle." "Ah," murmured the" second chief, andj
ne, too, covered nis . oyster plentifully
with tho fiery sauce, then swallowed one.
He. too. In a moment, was shedding tears.
His friend said gravely:
"Why do you weep, brother?"
"I weep," was the retort, "because X
am sorry that you were not slain In that
battle you spoke of, along with your
ion."
Good Reading for Frank.
Frank Rockefeller, a brother of the
Standard Oil magnate and the possessor
of enormous cattle ranches in Kansas
and Texas, has been visiting a nephew In
Emporia. And this Is the pleasant little
notice given of this visit by the Emporia
Gazette:
"Mr. Rockefeller came in from Kansas
City last night. He paid a visit to tho
Sunny Slope farm and afterward went
down to Simon Marker's and bought some
of his wild ducks and geese, which he
had sent to his ranch in Kiowa County.
When ho returned he took off his coat
and ate a big supper and complimented
Mrs. Rockefeller on her cooking. He said
It had been so long since he had eaten
such a big supper that he had forgotten
about It. After supper he sat around in
his shirt sleeves and chewed tobacco and
spit in the stove and was as agreeable
and common as if he was worth only $10.
000 or less. Instead of being worth $10,
000.000 or more."
Tillman's Other Weapon.
Baltimore Herald.
Occasionally Senator Tillman uses other
weapons than a pitchfork in chastising
his colleagues In the upper branch. For
instance, he walked up to Senator Bev
eridge in the chamber a few days ago and
shook hands and slapped him sharply on
the right wrist.
"And that's for your sassy statehood
speech," he said.
Early Rlslntr.
John Godfrey Saxe.
"God bless the man who first Invented sleep!"
So Sancho Panza said, and so say I;
And bless hlra. also, that he didn't keep
His great discovery to himself, nor try
To make It as the lucky fellow might
A close monopoly by patent-right!
Tea bless the man" who first Invented sleep,
(I really can't avoid the Iteration):
But bless the man. with curses loud and deep,
Whate'er the rascal's name, or age, or sta
tion. Who first Invented, and went round advising.
That artificial cut-off Early Rising!
"Rise with the lark, and with the lark to bed,-"
Observes some solemn, sentimental owl:
Maxims like these are very cheaply said;
But, ere you make yourself a fool or fowl.
Pray Just Inquire about his rise and fall.
And whether larks have any beds at all I
The time for honest folks to be abed
Is In the morning. It I reason right;
And he who cannot keep his precious head
Upon his pillow till Ifs fairly light.
And so enjoy his forty morning winks.
Is up to knavery; or else he drinks!
Thompson, who sung about the "Seasons." said
It was a glorious thing to "rise" In season:
But then he said It lying In his bed.
At 10 o'clock A. M. the very reason
He wrote so charmingly. The simple fact Is
His preaching wasn't sanctioned by his prac
tice. 'Tls doubtless well to be sometimes awake
Awake to duty, and awake to truth
But when, alas! a nice review we take
Of our best deeds and days, we find. In sooth.
The hours that leave the slightest cause to
weep
Are those we passed In childhood or asleep I
'Tls beautiful to leave the world awhile
For the soft visions of the gentle night;
And. free, at last, from mortal care or guile.
To live as only In the angels' sight.
In sleep's sweet realm, so cozlly shut In.
Where, at the worst, we only "dream" of sin!
So let us sleep, and give the Maker praise.
I like the lad who. when his father thought
To clip his morning nap by hackneyed phrase
Of vagrant worm by early songster caught,
Cried, "Served him right I It's not at all sur
prising: The worm was punish id, sir, for early rising!"
NOTE AND COMMENT.
A policeman's not always as blue as he
looko.
The printers of Washington must be a
tight-Bated lot
Portland had one divorce for every
seven marriages last year.
"Did you pacs your 'exams"?" said tho
cop to the fireman. And the small boy
grinned.
Never mind. Lent is only -10 days long.
The Legislature was In session 40 days
and we've got to atone in some way.
Poor lawyers and poor doctors are two
expensive luxuries. Who experiments with
both may hope for a bankrupt's grave.
At thbi rate tho Jetty is likely to be
finished before the transformation of the
Grant Into a dredge. But the Grant will
be rmiy for the Like Washington CanaL
While hack drivers take the negroes to
their bait, and whites split wood for the
Chine on Eecond street. But It's too late
to ict a "Jim crow" bill In this Legisla
ture. The litest Boston literary sharp to come
Into public notice is the Hon. William B.
Klrkpatrick. president of the Boston Bar
ttnAtrt Union, who makes specialties of
fihaksptr end Browning.
A number of aetrtn: of New York have
organized a "Copyright Face Club" to
protect their photgraj from reproduc
tion for ail aorta of impertinent advertis
ing. They're not likely to encounter much
trouble if the copyright doesn't extend
below the face, which Jn most cases forms
but a small and unimportant part ot the
Is much cry in certain quarters
because there is to be no women's build
ing at the St. Louis Exposition. One of
the women of the exposition eorrowfully
says:
It has taken SO years of hard work to put
women on an equality with men. and they are
equal In the exposition, yet we will have no
building.
Well, what of it? There Isn't going to
be a man's building, either. Is there?
According to Secretary Moody's report
S3 per cent of the bluejackets of our Navy
are citizens of the United States and 7S
per cent are native born. A few years
ago the majority of them were foreign
ersprincipally Scandinavians. At the
outbreak' of the war with Spain many
Continental newspapers prophesied that
the aliens would desert, leaving tho ships
dangerously short-handed, but they proved
loyal to a man.
The profound Billy Bryan, the modest
shrinking Billy Hearst and Cart Harrison,
the lucky, appear to) be the new Demo
cratic triumvirate. Having painted and
bedecked themselves with feathers,
donned their war bonnets and seized their
tomahawks and scalping knives, they are
skulking about the backyards of political
Influence and plotting the massacre of all
the Roosevelt palefaces. These kids have
been reading too much yellow .'literature."
The delirium of the Eugene Register is
becoming a serious matter, if we are to
Judge from the following disorderly out
break: The Incipient balm that betokens the coming
of ye gladsome springtide has roused the dor
mant energies ot the trilling swale frog, and
his gleeful vocalizations now presage an early
emancipation, .from the gloom and drizzle of
Winter's dispiriting murk. Soon the world will
be gay with springtime and Eugene will be at
her best, flooded with sunshine, the trees bud
ding greenly, the grass In the parks and on the
lawns an unbroken emerald, and the borders
bright with sweet-smelling flowers, and the
lilacs all In bloom.
A very black customs Inspector, one of
the President's recent appointees, boarded
a German steamship entering New York
harbor the other day. The immigrants
did not take to him at all, protesting that
ne could not speak the language. "Oh,
yes, ha speaks German all right," was
the reply of an old-timer. "Try him."
"How long you been in dais contree?"
asked a prospective citizen from the Low
country. . e
"Drel months," said the colored inspec
tor, gutturally.
"Orel month!" exclaimed the German.
"Ant so much color change? I go mo
back to Zhalrmany py ter next steamer."
A company of theatrical people .recently
tried to agree upon a list of 10 dramas
of American authorship that would sur
vive for two generations. Without much
difficulty they selected these nine:
Clyde Fitch's "Beau BrummeL"
Augustus Thomas "Alabama."
William Gillette's "Secret Service."
James Heme's "Shore Acres."
James Heme's "Margaret Fleming."
Judge Conrad's "Jack Cade."
John Howard Payne's "Brutus."
Dr. Bird's "Spartacus."
Mrs. Stowe's "Uncle Tom's Cabin."
For tne tenth opinion was hopelessly
divided between these five:
Bokers "Francesca da Rimini."
Branson Howard's "Aristocracy."
Heme's "Sag Harbor."
Thomas' "Arizona" and "In. Mlzzoura."
"The American Almanac. Year-Book,
Cyclopedia and Atlas," published by Will
lam R. Hearst, Is a newcomer in its field.
Its maiden edition of IMS is a book pf
nearly 1000 pages, compactly printed and
substantially bound. Within this scope
the extensive mission which is marked
out for it is well fulfilled for the needs
of the busy man In search of a handy
work of reference. Maps, with full in
dices, are copiously supplied to illustrate
the text, and the notable persons of the
world aro depicted in half-tones. Besides
covering the usual field of such publica
tions, there are a number of innovations.
"Society in the UnltedStates" three pages
of a gossipy review, with pictures of
prominent New York women may be con
sidered, perhaps, a modest beginning of
an American Almanach de Gotha. The
book contains an immense mass of facts,
systematically arranged.
PLEASANTRIES OF PARAGRAPIIERS
Dolly You say Grace married Into the smart
set? Partly Gracious, no; she was divorced Into
It. Baltimore Herald.
He Wh3t would you call a "polite Action"?
She Why, If I should say to you. "Really, Mr.
Jones, I hope you are not thinking of going so
soon! Judge.
Bookseller T have something exceedingly rare
In the way of books. Blinks Thanks. When
it comes to a book. I prefer one that Is well
done. Harpers Bazar.
Deacon Johnson What yo' doln' now. Abe
Abe Hardcase Cleanln' out a bank. Deacon
Johnson President, cashier, bookkeeper or lan
ltorT Leslie's weekly.
Clara Going in for charity again, are you
What Is It this time? Dora we are going
distribute cheap copies of Beethoven's synJ
phonics among tne poor. Music Is such an a!
to digestion, you know. New York Weekly.
Maud I feel so sorry for poor Lillian. Shi
and neggle had it all planned to elope, an)
now they have to give It up. Jack what
the trouble? Maud She can't persuade hi
stingy old papa to give them the money
carry It out- Kansas City Journal.
"Dear," said the ardent lover, "the date yd
have set for our wedding falls upon a FrldsJ
You re not superstitious about that, I hope
"Oh. no." replied the popular actress; "Itl
never phase me It I'm married on tfclrte
Fridays." Philadelphia Press.