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About Morning Oregonian. (Portland, Or.) 1861-1937 | View Entire Issue (Jan. 25, 1901)
-fJTHT"W1"- JJ ' "W '" WWdBt" THE MORNING OEEGONIAN, FRIDAY JANUARY 25, 1901. 'aw'w ".sirtarfimfw1i te rgommt. Entered at the Postoffice at Portland. Oregon, as second-class matter. TELEPHONES. Editorial Booms 1HO I Business OOee...607 REVISED SUBSCRIPTION KATES. Br Mall (postage prepaid). In Advance D&uy, with Sunday, per month 5 S5 Daily, Sunday excepted, per year 7 00 Dally with Sunday, per year 8 00 Sunday, per year - yjj The Weekly, per year.. 1 J The Weekly. 3 months w To City Subscribers Daily, per week, delivered. Sundays excepted.lBc Daily, per week, delivered. Sundays lncluded.20c POSTAGE RATES United States. Canada and Mexico: 10 to 10-page paper Jc 18 to 32 page paper 2C Foreign rates double. News or discussion Intended for publication In The Oregonlan should be addressed invaria bly "Editor The Oregoalan," not to the name of any Individual Letters relating to advertis ing, subscriptions or to any business matter should be addressed simply "The Oregonlan." The Oregonlan does not buy poems or stories from Individuals, and cannot undertake to re turn any manuscripts sent to it without solici tation. No stamps should be Inclosed for this purpose. Puget Sound Bureau Captain A. Thompson, once at 1111 Pacific a-enue. Tacoma. Box 055. Tacoma Postfflce. Eastern Business Office The Tribune build ing. New Tork City; "The Rookery." Chicago; the 6, C Beckwlth special agency. New Tork. For sale In San Francisco by J. K. Cooper. 78 Market street, near the Palace Hotel; Gold Bmlth Bros., 288 Sutter street: F. W. Pitts. 1008 Market street; Foster & Orear, Ferry News stand. For sale In Los Angeles by B. F. Gardner. 259 So. Spring street, and Oliver 4 Haines, 100 So. Spring street. For sale In Chicago by the P. O. News Co., 217 Dearborn street. For sale In Omaha by H. C Shears. 105 N. Sixteenth street, and Barkalow Bros., 1612 Farnam street. For sale In Salt Lake by the Salt Lake News Co., 77 W, Second South street. For sale In New Orleans by Ernest & Co., X16 Royal street. On file in Washington D. C. with A. W. Dunn. 500 14th N. W. For sale In Denver, Colo., by Hamilton & Kendrlck, 808-012 Seventh street. - TODAY'S WEATHER. northwesterly -winds. -Probably fair, -with 1 PORTLAND, FRIDAY, JANUARY 25. The Democratic floor leader of the House has only one thing against, the naval bill; it was developed in "Wednes day's running debate, and that is that the amounts appropriated seem to be gradually increasing. This Is a notable tribute to the honesty and efficiency of the Navy Department, whose esti mates have been approved by the naval committee, but it is a terrible arraign ment of the Nation as a whole. "What we ought to have, of course, is a series of naval appropriations growing less and less as time goes on, so tbat In due course the amount set aside for new ships and repairs on old would simply be no dollars. How can this end. so desirable in Mr. Richardson's view, be effected? There are two ways. One is to have rlo Navy, and let the rest of the world run over us at its own sweet will. Another Is to reverse the process by which we have established the need of a Navy. Instead of expan sion, take up shrinkage. Get rid of the Philippines Germany will take them gladly, either from us as a gift, or from Agulnaldo with Dietrich's aid. Give Porto Rico and Cuba back to Spain, Alaska to Russia, Hawaii to Its royal family, Texas and California to Spain, the Pacific Northwest to Eng land and Chief Joseph, the Mississippi Valley to Prance. By continuing this process of shrinkage, in righteous an- tagonism to the unholy cause of expan sion, our need of a Navy would disap pear, and with It the increasing appro priations. Mr. Richardson's real griev ance, evidently, Is not against the Navy, but against the country. Its maritime advance Is only an Incident In our general widening of territory. growth of population, Increase In trade and gain in wealth. The country Is too Infernally big and busy and prosper ous. Let us lay the ax to the root of the tree. Make Uncle Sam a boy again, turn back the clock, and then our pes simistic statesmen will be no, not con tented, but merely driven to some other theme of misery and grief. Senator Vest, of Missouri, a states man of the old school, a lawyer of acu men, a man with a long lifetime of public service, stood up In the Senate "Wednesday and delivered a speech against the subsidy bill that compelled congratulations from men of all par ties. Vest was right about the bill, and his recognized abilities served to put the Democratic position In a strong light But why should Mr. Vest trou ble himself about a matter of this sort? The Democratic party does not want his advice or counsel or aid, and It does not believe In going before the country on the principles he advocates. It has Bryan he is enough for it in the way of men. It has free sliver, free riot and class hatred for its principles. and they are all-sufficient In the way of iBBUes. The Kansas City Convention didn't want Mr. Vest or need him, and It never missed his presence or his counsel. His idea that Government should get along without bothering Us head about Individual privileges is not Democratic doctrine, for the party's at titude on this matter was thoroughly defined by Mr. Bryan In his pathetio protests that a poor apple-grower is not as well fixed as a trust magnate, and that poor men's wives do not have as elegant Summer homes as the wives of the rich. "What is the use of talking about the Iniquity of subsidies so long as the crime of '73 Is unavenged and the man with the blistered hand cries in vain for sliver dollars on payday? If the Democratic party would adopt the views of Cleveland, Carlisle, Caf fery, Lindsay, Gray, Palmer, Mills, Ol- ney. "Watterson, Vilas and others whom it has driven out of its ranks, it might take some comfort in Vest's speech on the subsidy bill. But as that might compel Mr. Bryan to go to work like other men, a sphere in which, whether as actor, editor or lawyer, he Is help less, the thing can't be done. The peer less leader and great commoner, as he calls himself, must keep the throne at all hazards. Otherwise, Democrats might also be men. Mrs. Carrie Nation, of Wichita, Kan., is a fanatical woman, whom it requires a great stretch of imagination to call a reformer. A fury let loose among bot tles and glasses, she smashes without discrimination and demolishes without reason. One cannot witnnola sympa thy from a woman whose home has been destroyed and whose husband or sons have been debased by drink, if in desperation and madness she strikes blindly at the visible means that have wrought woe, and desolation to her house But the strongest element in this sympathy takes the form of regret for her misguided action. There is ab solutely nothing remedial in a fury that vents itself, upon inanimate objects. No principle is vindicated and none as sailed thereby. Mrs. Nation is, upon one subject at least, insane. Her hus band and friendF who aid and excuse her In the special line in -which her in sanity finds expression are, if more sane than she, the more reprehensible, since they should soothe -and check rather than encourage her in her folly. True reform discountenances all violence, and such expressions in its name must of necessity be repudiated by practical, orderly people. It Is difficult to see -what justifies de lay or hesitation at Salem in the matter of a drydock for Portland. Of course, if we want all vessels that need dock ing to make their charters to Puget Sound, or to be dragged around there after they get here, we can let things drift Puget Sound has two docks and Is going to get two more. It would seem that the necessity for having one on the Columbia would need no demon stration to any one sincerely Interested In the welfare of the port and the state. At the last session a Legislative meas ure would have been asked for, but It was expected that the "drydock would be built by a local shipbuilding firm. That has proved impracticable, and nothing is left to be done but to get an act from the Legislature this time ena bling the City of Portland to bond itself Jtor the requisite amount Portland is willing to do this, and no time should be lost The Oregon Legislature will honor the state In honoring the memory of the gallant dead of the Second Oregon, and the gallant living, as well, by provid ing means, supplemental to the volun teer fund now on hand, for the erec tion of a suitable monument commem orative of their patriotism, their serv ice and their death. That popular sub scriptions to this fund have ceased is not due to lack of appreciation of the work of the regiment that went eagerly to hard military service In a foreign field. Everywhere and by all classes of our citizens this service Is regarded with the admiration that is the just meed of courage and patriotism. Sub scriptions lagged and finally ceased in obedience to the fact expressed In the trite saying, '"What Is everybody's business Is nobody's business." To fix individual responsibility in the matter and provide funds from the publlo purse to carry out the wishes of the people of the state in regard to it is the purpose of the bill Introduced by Sena tor Hunt, printed Tuesday. A bill more popular than this one is not likely to be submitted to the Legisla ture this session, nor one which will meet with less opposition in either branch of that body. NOT A NEW OBJECTION. "Tut! Fear boys with bugs." The expression Is Shakespeare's. "We may apply It to those who try to frighten the country with the "bug" of "Imperi alism." Justice, liberty and civilization will be advanced through our retention of the Islands recently acquired from Spain. "We are told now daily by wise editors and others who used to quote "West ward the star of empire," etc., without a tremor, that the word empire, which, as employed In this saying and as our fathers were wont to use It meaning simply rule or domain is unfit to pass American lips. That was not Jeffer son's opinion. He shied neither at the word empire nor at the thing. He ac quired the great Louisiana territory, he was for acquiring Cuba; he looked for ward to the next war for acquisition of Canada. In one of his letters to Madi son he wrote, "I am persuaded that no constitution was ever so well calculated as ours lor empire ana seir-govern-ment." Here Is the dreadful word, used without hesitation, by the author -of the phrase about consent of the governed. A subscriber to The Oregonlan writes that he cannot take The Oregonlan any longer because "it advocates violation of the Constitution" In this matter of retention of the Islands taken over from Spain. That acquisition of territory Is violation of the Constitution is an old objection, set up by "antl" people. It was asserted as violently when we re ceived Louisiana as it Is asserted now. The atrocity of taking California from Mexico was dwelt upon with equal In dignation by our "antl" people. The hope was expressed that Mexico would "welcome our soldiers with bloody hands to hospitable graves." This Is an ancient fury. Josiah Qulncy, the head of the great family of New England, said: "This Constitution never was and never can be strained to lap over all the wilderness of the West, without essentially affecting both the rights and the convenience of Its real propri etors. It was never intended to form a covering for the inhabitants of the Missouri and the Red River country; and whenever It Is attempted to be stretched over it will rend asunder. I oppose," he added, "this bill (for the acquisition of Louisiana) from no ani mosity to the people, but from the deep conviction that It contains a principle Incompatible with the liberties and safety of my country. This bill, If it passes, is a death blow to the Constitu tion. It may afterward linger, but, lin gering, Its fate will at no very distant period be consummated." Great num bers talked that way. We had then, In proportion to the population, a greater number of fearful souls than now. We have subdued savagery, enlarged the limits of civilization, opened wider opportunities for liberty, given justice broader fields, through these measures thus deplored. Who doubts, on any reasonable ground, that we shall do the same In our. new possessions? NEEDLESS SACRIFICE OF LIFE. Over six weeks have passed since the British ship Andrada picked up Pilot Cordlner off the mouth of the river and vanished" In the fog and darkness. There was a striking similarity between the case of this vessel and that of the Cadzow Forest, which vanished wjjth all on board after taking a pilot aboard about four years ago. The only mes sage that ever came back from the Cadzow Forest was a life buoy picked up on the west coast of Vancouver Island, months after the disappearance of the ship. As the days drift into weeks and the weeks run into months, the conviction grows that a similar message Is all that will come back from the Andrada. Four other ships bound for this port and Puget Sound are now so long overdue that but little hope is expressed for their safety. Should the worst fears for this fleet be I realized, upwards of 200 lives will be sacrificed, and the property loss will approximate $500,000. Less than three years have passed since the Caradoc, Laurelbank, Midas and Dominion, bound across the Pacific Ocean for Oregon and "Washington ports, disappeared in the same manner. Five years ago the Lord Brassey and a number of other ships disappeared while making the voyage. All of these ships -were In ballast, and in nearly every case the trouble was said to be due to an Insufficiency of ballast, and to that which was carried "being Im properly secured. Losses from this cause are becoming so frequent that It would aeem an opportune time to enact legislation to prevent them. An Inter national law covering this point should be made, and made quickly. All of the great maritime nations of the world have stringent laws preventing the overloading of vessels, and yet there Is nothing apparently which will prevent a stingy owner or a daredevil captain from sending an Insufficiently ballasted ship to sea. Times come Inevitably when storms sweep over the ocean with a violence that the best skill of man Is powerless to withstand, but the history of wrecks in the North Pacific shows that prac tically all of the trouble encountered by the ballast ships has been due to an Insufficiency of ballast, lack of shifting boards, or both. The desired legislation to put an end to these sacrifices of life and property, or at least to minimize them, should seemingly emanate from the underwriters, who must foot the bills; but if these persons fail to take action, it Is the time for Government to act. THE BIRTHDAY OF BURNS. Today the birthday of Robert Burns will be celebrated with appropriate honors of speech and song by all the English-speaking people of the globe. Today wherever you And a Scotchman, whether he languishes under the fires of the tropical sun or shivers within the confines of the Arctic zone, you will find him drinking the health of Scot land's greatest poet The universal reverence paid to the memory of Burns by his countrymen Is due to the fact that all Scotland Is in his verse; "the links, the watchwords, the Masonic symbols 'of the Scottish race." His ca pacity to make all his poetry redolent of Scotland, to taste of all the alkalies of Its soil and to smack of all Its sweet ness, has given Burns his grip on the heart of Scotland. If this was all that could be said of him, Burns would be little better than the gifted minstrel of a single clan, but Burns is one of the world's men, for he was equally the minstrel, the poet and the philoso pher. In his own day William Pitt, cold, stately Englishman, a university scholar and accomplished orator, promptly recognized Burns as a great poet despite the fact that Burns was a political radical who threw up his hat and cheered over the destruction of the Bastile. Burns has always had the widest popularity In America, not only among the plain people, but among our severely educated scholar poets. Whit tier's praise of Burns Is not more fer vent than that of Holmes, while Low ell writes of the brooklike songs of Burns, whom "glory never weaned from humble smiles find tears." Burns' works are known' to every man in every clime where the English tongue Is spoken. Nearly .seventy years ago his works were rendered Into German. The strength of Burns with English men and Americans Is a far severer test of the original depth and breadth of his genius than his Immortal memory with the whole Scottish people, for he is loved by the Scotch chiefly because his muse Is Intensely Scotch. But Burns appeals to the rest of the English-speaking -world because his genius Is of the sort that found its field of art work in the home of all unconventional men that are unspoiled by pinchbeck culture. The eighteenth century's best poetic product had been poets of the brilliant artificial quality of Pope, while Goldsmith was a mere melodious flute player In the fields. Burns was a new date for poetry of the natural school of song. He was "a living man set beyond the pedant's tether," and It was this quality, this new departure In poetry, that caught the eye of the cold but critical William Pitt, who saw at once that a new star had risen In the literary firmament The poetry of Burns Is really the inspiration of Wordsworth's earliest and beBt lyrics, allowing for the fact that Wordsworth as a man of scholastic culture could not write intelligibly for the peasant folk that comprehended Burns. The fame of Burns endures the test of time. In his last years Tennyson confessed that the songs of Bums were so perfect that there was nothing In our literature to compare with them In beauty out side of the best of Shakespeare's. In originality and versatility of poetic power, directed to themes that are part of human nature's dally food, there Is nothing since Shakespeare that equals "Tarn o' Shanter" and "The Jolly Beg gars." There are passages In "Tam o' Shanter" that recall the incantation of the witches In "Macbeth'" bver their cauldron, and there Is no better picture of the social anarchist since Shakes peare sketched "Jack Cade" and his men than that drawn by Burns In the "Jolly Beggars," when the tramps in the barn applaud the lines: A fig for those by law protected; Liberty's a glorious feast; Courts for cowards were erected; Churches built to please a priest. It is common to hear regret ex pressed that Burns died so early that we possess only a tithe of what was In him; that penury and disappointment curbed the flow of his noble soul; but these regrets we believe are without foundation. Like Byron, he did his best work, not when he was compara tively free from trouble, but when he was in suffering and trouble, and, like Byron, while his life was short, he probably gave us his best and highest notes. He never spared with his satire false pride of birth, or false pretenses in religion. It has been said of him that "Burns generous verse sprang out of the Iron-bound Calvinism of the land like water flowing from Horeb's Tock." He needs no monument, for the English-speaking world has always read him and will continue to read him and clasp him closely to Its great throb bing heart It is- said that the doom of the silver dollar the cumbrous cartwheel that has long retarded the movement of the commercial car has been sounded. Di rector Roberts, of the mint, said recent ly that there was ho demand for this always unpopular coin, and that it was destined before long to pass perma nently out of existence as a part of our currency. In regard to subsidiary silver coin, half-dollars, quarter-dollars and dimes, the reverse Is true, the de mand for them increasing so fast that the mint cannot keep pace with It; whereas the Government is now coining the smallest number of silver dollars allowed by law, 1,500,000 a month. The bullion for these Is taken from the vast, store purchased before the repeal of the Sherman act In 1893. Of this store, about 65,000,000 ounces, or enough for 585,000.000, remain on hand. Director Roberts thinks the coinage of silver dollars should at once and forever be Btopped, and the silver bullion on hand be used for the subsidiary coins. As soon as this is accomplished, he favors a recolnage of the big dollars Into the smaller denominations, thus giving the people coins that they want and can handle in place of those that they do not want and cannot carry In their pockets. A bill has been introduced Into Congress embodying these, views. If it becomes a law, It will be but a question of a few years when the 600, 000,000 silver dollars now In circulation will assume a more convenient form. A dispatch from San Francisco a few days ago stating that a man from Brit ish Columbia suffering from consump tion had been refused a landing at that' port created some surprise. While, as in the case of 'other germ diseases, con sumption is contagious under certain conditions, It is not communicated by the simple presence of the sufferer. It has been scientifically demonstrated that the seeds of this disease must be conveyed, if by the air, only through the sputum having become dry and arising in the form of dust. So preva lent Is this disease and so general the habit of expectoration In public, It is probable that no one escapes exposure to these germs in the dry season of the year. Many persons are Immune on account of constitutional resistant powers, while others are susceptible to Infection through contrary conditions. Ordinary Intelligence in. the care of a consumptive Is all that Is required to ward off Infection. The danger lies more in the habit of expectorating in public and in an infected milk or meat supply than in nursing a patient af flicted with the disease. In this view it is unwarrantable to .treat a consump tive as a leper or a victim of smallpox, whose touch or presence is contamina tion. Efforts to establish a branch of the Young Women's Christian Association in this city go steadily forward, and should, as they no doubt will, meet ul timately with gratifying success. The usefulness of the Y. M. C. A. has long ago become a fixed fact In the urban life of the Nation. Helpful because It is self-helpful; suggesting and leading to upright, self-sustaining endeavor; recognizing the social needs of life while contributing to its spiritual re quirements and industrial needs, this organization has done a work the scope of which cannot be overestimated. All that the Y. M. C". A. has done for young men, or, more specifically, as much as It has done for men, the Y. W. C. A. may, if properly managed, do for young women. Changed conditions In indus trial life have made a place, and, In deed, created a demand, for such an or ganization, and the response has al ready been macle In many cities. It is a matter of congratulation that Port land is soon to fall Into line In this en deavor, since In so doing It will testify In a practical way to its progressive spirit There is something that commends Itself even to republican simplicity In the Instant succession of a trained man to the rulershlp of a great nation,, with out the strain and intrigue of a political campaign and the uncertainties and ex citement of a general election. Edward VII In his long tutelage as Prince of Wales must have been a dull pupil in deed in governmental law If what he has learned does not stand the country In good stead, now that he is its recog nized head. If he has learned from his astute mother the subtle art of keeping hands off where interference would be detrimental to the interests of the Nation; If he has been duly im pressed by her upright life and the loyalty that attended It through long years to Its very close, that old things, as monarchies go, have passed away and orders his life and reign accord ingly, there is no reason to suppose that the house of Hanover will not con tinue to hold a firm and, In a sense, a sacred place in the affections of the British people. Alexandra, Queen Consort of Edward VII, has become identified with the English people through nearly a third of a century as Princess of Wales. Of sturdy Danish stock, beautiful and carefully reared, she went to England in her girlhood as the bride of the heir apparent to the throne. As mother and grandmother of future Kings, she has succeeded to the long-deferred title of Queen Consort Many joys and sor rows He between her wedding day and the day of her husband's accession to the throne; her position has often b.een a most trying one, but she has endured all and overcome all, and today occu pies a place In the hearts of the 'British people only second to that so long filled by Queen Victoria. Opinions differ in regard to Edward VII and his ability to fill the measure of the expectation of his subjects, but n,o one doubts that his Queen will bring womanly dignity and sweetness to the position that she will occupy by his side. A farmer has asked what Industry game laws protect Has he forgotten the entertainment and pleasure of "sportsmen"? Recreation and diver sion are the chief Industries of the state, as any one knows who does not think otherwise, although they produce nothing and trample green wheat fields. A Nebraska professor has predicted disintegration of the British Empire after the death of Victoria. He Is won derfully If not supernaturally gifted with prophecy. Who ever thought dis integration of China would follow the death .of Darius? An Astoria paper says the boycott committee Is pleading with citizens to keep their money at home. This Is a hard whack at the stocks and prices of Astoria merchants. The Congressional committee decided that the death of Booz was not due to hazing. If he is within hearing, doubt less he will be glad to know it Many women are glass smashers, but Mrs. Nation is the only one whose notoriety in that respect Is National. CASE OF HOWARD AT STANFORD New York Tribune. The little flurry oh the Pacific Coast caused by the dismissal of Professor How ard, of Leland Stanford. Jr., University, for conduct unbecoming a scholar and a gentleman, has been prolonged with some indications of artificial encouragement, by the voluntary withdrawal of two or three of his sympathetic colleagues. Thus far, however, there are no signs that the country Is alarmed for the safety of its educational institutions and, on the whole we should say that the incident was not unlikely to have salutary conse quences. There Is reason to think that the air which college Instructors of a cer tain type have been breathing of late years needs to be cleared, for their own sake as well as for the general advan tage, in order that a more distinct view may be obtained of their real place in the order of existence. We are not lacking In true respect either for the scholars of eminent character and attainments whose Influence upon the thought and life of their time is gratefully recognized, or for the great majority of inconspicuous instructors who do their appointed work with a devotion and i thoroughness which are perhaps too sel dom estimated at their real value. But in contrast to such men there is a small class of college professors In whom an erroneous conception or their own natural ability, and especially of their aptitude for public affairs, has been unhappily fostered by the newspaper attention which they expertly solicit, and who have con sequently come to look upon themselves as authentically commissioned to direct the progress of events. Hence they oc cupy their excessive leisure In commu nicating to the wx)rld their views on all conceivable subjects, excepting, perhaps, those which they are expected to investi gate and employed to teach, and are not infrequently enabled to obtain a notoriety which rewards their cheap ambition, but which Is out of all proportion to the value of their opinions. It may be well to add in passing that they do not often actually Imperil their connection with the college to which they are a detriment, and possi bly in condemning Professor Howard's excursion far outside his sphere of duty and the limits of decency some credit should be given to him for a certain sort of courage. But assuredly that is the single- concession which it Is permissible to make in his behalf. The quality of the man and the grossness of his offense are sufficiently indicated in these phases, taken from his harangue denouncing the dismissal of Professor Ross last Novem ber: "I do not wotshlp Saint Market Street; I do not reverence Holy Standard Oil, nor do I doff my hat to Celestial Six Companies." There is no manly assertion of principle in this; but only a gratuitous exposure of venomous personal hostility to Interests and Individuals identified with the foundation and support of the Insti tution which employed him, to which he owed unswerving loyalty, and from his connection -with which his vulgar utter ances derived the only importance they possessed. It Is from instructors of this general type that the perfervld talk about freedom of teaching chiefly proceeds. As we have suggested, they are not wholly to blame for their misconceptions, since a consid erable number of their fellow-citizens, in clubs, newspaper offices and political re form circles, are singularly fond of cod dling them, until their natural vanity thus cultivated finally leads them to think It more important to liberate their opinions on any subject which comes into their heads than to promote the essential pur poses for which the institutions that em ploy them were founded. It is reasonable to hope that the recent occurrences at Stanford, without threatening true free dom of teaching In any manner or degree. will tend to check the spread of false and mischievous notion that the possession of a college chair confers upon Its Incum bent a license to degrade Its dignity and undermine the influence which it was de signed to exert The Resourceful Publisher. "A Letter to a Young Publisher," in London Punch, shows how by the simple expedient of selection and omission all re views may be made to bear a smiling aspect. The experiment is made on an imaginary novel of the rising novelist Penwiper: I. THE RAW MATERIAL. "Mr. Penwiper's latest production, 'Ma ria's Marriage, scarcely calls for serious notice. It seems hard to believe that even the most tolerant reader will contrive to study with attention a work of which every page contains glaring errors of taste. Humor, smartness and Interest are all conspicuously wanting." The Thun derer. "This book Is undeniably third-rate dull, badly written, Incoherent; in fine, a dismal failure." The Wigwam. "If 'Maria's Marriage' has any real mer it, it is as an object-lesson to aspiring authors. Here, we would say to them, is a striking example of the way In which romance should not be written. Set your self to produce a work exactly Its op posite in every particular, and the chances are that you will produce, if not a mas terpiece, at least, a tale free from the most glaring faults. For the terrible warning thus afforded .by his volume to budding writers, Mr. Penwiper deserves to be heartily thanked." Dally Tele phone. " 'Maria's Marriage' is another book that we have received in the course of the month." The Parachute. II. THE t RESULT. "Maria's Marriage!" "Maria's Mar riage!" Gigantic Success The Talk of London. The 29th edition will be issued this week if the sale of 28 previous ones makes this necessary. Each edition Is strictly lim ited! "Maria's Marriage!" The voice of the press Is simply unani mous. Read the following extracts taken almost at random from the reviews of leading papers: "Mr. Penwiper's latest production . . . calls for serious notice . . . the reader will . . . study with attention a work of which every page contains taste, hu mor, smartness and interest!" The Thun derer. . "Undeniably . . . fine!" The Wig wam. "Has . . . real merit ... an object lesson ... a striking example of the way in which romance . . . should be written. A masterpiece . . . free from faults. Mr. Penwiper deserves to be heartily thanked!" Dally Telephone. "The book ... of the month!" The Parachute, etc., etc. "Maria's Marriage!" A veritable Tri umph! Order It from your Bookseller to day! Much Tails nnu Small Result. Detroit Free Press. The various reform and anti-vice cru sadea that are being carried on In differ ent parts of the country have resulted thus far in a maximum of talk and a minimum of improvement. In certain re spects the American citizen is a most shiftless creature politically. He talks a great deal about his' rights and his liber ties, but he will undergo an astonishing amount of inconvenience before ha will take steps to protect those rights and liberties. In municipal affairs he is re freshingly indifferent to his civic duties. Occasionally he turns one set of rascals out for the sake of putting another set in. but this is largely in the way of mak ing a more even distribution of the loot He has no illusions as to the eventual outcome of It all, and knows that ulti mately the new government will be as bad as its predecessor. SAD DEGENERACY IN DIETETICS Kansas City Star. In the New York Sun a Connecticut Yankee sounds an alarm about the dis appearance of what 13 known in the East as "hasty pudding" and in the West as cornmeal mush. Here is another ad monition to the American public regard ing the steady encroachment of Scotch oats, shredded biscuits, wheatlna and all of the spurious stuffs which are classified under the specious name of "food ce reals." The progress of this form of dietetic heterodoxy has apparently been mora pronounced in the East than in the West, but It is sufficiently rapid every where to create anxiety and to invito pre ventive measures' It is not, to say the least, a happy omen for the new cen tury, for there is not much to be hoped for from a civilization which rejects that which is genuine and takes up with a miserable imitation. The arguments In favor of cornmeal mush as against any of its flimsy sub stitutes are abundant and lnvlclble. It is to be prized primarily for Its thorough Americanism. It is rather a cause of sat isfaction to know that the efforts to pop ularize Indian corn in Europe have not been highly successful. This, of course. Indicates the distinctively National char acter of this fine cereal and its inadapta bility to effete and decadent tastes. Its consumption should be maintained as a matter'of patriotism, If for nothing else, though there are other more practical considerations which may be urged In Its behalf. Its strongest recommendation Is lt3 Intrinsic excellence. It lacks none of the qualities of a perfect article of diet. It is bountiful. It Is available to all, it is cheap, it is delicious and It Is wholesome. "What can put a keener edge on ap petite than the sound .of a sputtering mush pot and its tempting fragrance! It is small wonder that the process of pre paring "hasty pudding" according to the New England vernacular should have in spired the homely poet to draw the fol lowing picture: Meanwhile the housewife urges all her care The well-earned feast to hasten and prepare. The sifted meal already waits her hand. The milk Is strained, the bowls In order stand. The fire flames high: and. oa a pool (that takes The headlone stream that o'er the mllldam breaks) Foams, wars and rages with Incessant tolls. So the vex'd caldron rages, roars and bolls. First with clean salt she seasons well the food. Then strews the flour and thickens all the flood. Long o'er the simmering fire she lets it stand; To stir It well demands a stronger hand; The husband takes hla turn; and round and round The ladle flies; at last the toll is crown'd. Mush and milk! What fond recollec tions are awakened by reference to that delectable combination! How it recalls the memory of simple feasts which might have delighted tho gods themselves, and given them a new puissance. And then the joy of fried mush with syrup or gravy! Could anything be more satisfac tory? Think of the crisp brown rectan gles heaped high on the platter and In viting the assaults of unsophisticated di gestion! Has anything appeared in all of the range of new-fangled cereal prepara tions which can offer the slightest justi fication for the relegation of mush, boiled or fried? Is it not a cause for humilia tion and regret that, under the false plea of hygiene, the comfortable and substan tial dishes of a more sincere and genuine age should have been replaced by prepara tions that are anaemic and trifling? Shredded biscuits and Scotch oats, in deed! Are these cereal Impostures to nour ish the manhood and womanhood of the. 20th century in the United States of Amer ica? Perish the thought! Out with such a paltry desertion of finer and stronger ideals! Away with such hospitality to enfeebling innovations! Throw away the stew pan! Hang on to the mush pot! Let th blaze burn clear and strong, and wield tho ladle with a. hearty, good will.,, Shake off the enervating Influences wnicn came in with the abandonment or nasty pudding" and get down to first princi ples. ' Cruel Chrlstophe. "Where Black Rules White; Haiti " Prlchard. There seems to have been nothing to ap peal to in the "Emperor" Christophe's na ture. Bravery, humility, all alike failed to touch him. He had no bowels of mercy. He was one day on the battlements with a youth, who, perhaps presuming on past favors, In. some manner displeased him. The drop from those sheer walls is 2000 feet to the plain below. "You are, of course, about to die," said Chrlstophe, "but I will be kind to you. You Bhall have a choice or aeatns. jsuner you tnrow yourself over here or the soldiers shall shoot you." The young man chose to fling himself into space. But by a miracle he fell among some trees or bushes on the cllff-slde, and so escaped with a broken arm. He gathered himself up somehow, and presented himself again before the Emperor. "Your bidding has been done, sire," he . said. "Yes, It has," remarked Chrlstophe, "and I am very much Inter ested to find that you survive. Oblige me by trying if you can do it again I" Good Riddance. Philadelphia Press. "Aw!" exclaimed the visiting Briton, "everything here is so new, don't you know. You have no noble old ruins in America, as we have!" "No," replied the Yankee; "they mere ly come over here to marry our heiresses; then they go back home to England again." PLEASANTRIES OF PARAGRAPHERS How It Happened. HI Stockpole I see that city feller ye took out huntln' yesterday got a few quail. Josh Gunn Aw, yes! A fool bird would occasionally fly into the shot. Puck. Home-Grown Luster. "Then you don't bank much on ancestral pride?" "No; It is more to a man's credit to start from nowhere and be Bomebody than to start from somewhere and be nobody." Indianapolis Journal. His Ambition. Wlgg Isn't it funny the way Lodger is always Joining some new society? Wagg Well, he confided In me that he hopes to become famous some day as the sole sur vivor of something or other. Cleveland Leader. Nothing of the Kind. "Why, that's a gen uine Raphael!" said the caller, surprised and delighted. "Not at all," replied Mrs. Gaswell, with cold dlstantness. "My husband never en gages In raffles. He bought that picture In the regular way and paid cash for It." Chi cago Tribune. What Hurt Her. Mrs. Heartless Just to think, my husband fell and broke and broke Mrs. Slmpythetlk There, dear, I heard all about It; the poor man broke his leg; It's a great affliction, I know, but Mrs. Heartless Oh, I didn't mean that; you haven't heard the worst he was carrying my new Venetian vase when he fell, and broke It, too. Ohio State Journal. An Interesting Story. "Yes," said the states man with the kindly eye but the firmly set mouth, "I like to read about Noah and the ark." "What brought them to your atten tion?" "Nothing in particular. I couldn't avoid being struck by the manner- In which Noah and his sons went to work and carried , the enterprise through without asking -a pen ny's assistance from the government. But, of course, those were primitive days." Washing ton Star. Making: a Man. Nixon Waterman in Christian Endeavor World. Hurry the baby as fast as you can. Hurry him, worry him, make him a man. Off with his baby clothes, get him In pants, Feed him on braln-fooda and make him ad vance. Hustle him, soon as he's able to walk. Into a grammar school; cram him with talk. Fill his poor head full of figures and facts, Keep on a-Jammlng them In till It crocks. Once boys grew up at a rational rate, Now we develop a man while you wait Rush him through college, compel him to grab Of every known subject a dip and a dab. Get htm in business and after the cash. All by the time he can grow a musttahe. Let him forget he was ever a boy. Make gold his god and its Jingle his Joy. Keep him a-hustltng and clear out of breath, , Until be wins nervous prostration and death. NOTE AND COMMENT. Mrs. Nation seems about as hard t down as General Dewet "The Vacant Chair" is now the popular song at Stanford University. And now the Willy boys must hasten to find out how the new Prince of Wales wears his clothes. Alfred Austin- Is probably but no, even he must have some respect for so great a woman as the late Queen. Mrs. Nation may not think twice before sho does anything, but she cannot be called a woman who wrecks not Roosevelt has killed a lion with his knife. He will remain In Colorado, how ever, till he ties the record of Hercules. If Bryan refused an offer of $10,000 a year to become the editor of a Denver paper, what salary must he be paying himself? That fine old phrase, "fanfare of trum pets," is again parading pompously through the correspondence of the Asso ciated Press. The barbers' effort to get a law passed prohibiting any of their craft working on Sunday reminds one of the colonists who voted that "the laws of God should gov ern them till they had time to make hot ter ones." Again the oppressor rears his awful head, and raises his heavy hand to crush with aslngle Mow the palladium of our liberties, the liberties that our forefath ers struggled for when they wrung Magna Charta from the unwilling hand of King John, when they removed the haughty head of Charles the First, and when they Inscribed their autographs on the im mortal Declaration of Independence, and sent the army of George the Third whim pering back to its ships. One of the sacred institutions of the Nation is threatened with annihilation, and it is "up to" a sov ereign people to rise and robel. Repre sentative D. M. Watson, himself com passed about by all the Immunities and privileges of a Republic so" benign as to extend the right of free speech even to & Bryan Democrat, stands boldly forth and In brazen tones asks the people of the State of Oregon In Legislature assembled to abolish the free lunch! Surely here is a fitting champion of the cause of the downtrodden Filipino, a man well quali fied to remove the heel of oppression from the Tagal bandit, and lift the yoke of tyranny from the stooping shoulders of the silver-mine proprietor. What free schools are to the children of this en lightened Republic, what free speech la to the anarchist, and what free transpor tation Is to the member of Congress, that Is free lunch to the American politician. The advocate of this monstrous measure says In Its defense that It Is retaliatory, that It enables the restaurant-keeper tne Is one of them) to "break even" with the saloon-keeper, for the saloon-keeper may dispense food at any and all times, while the restaurant-keeper who sella liquor must pay a license for tho privilege. But what has the American politician to do with the petty bickerings of the men Who feed the public and those who quench its thirst? An institution is threatened, a heritage left us by our fathers, arid which we hope to bequeath to our sbns Wo must again take up the struggle -afidifight for the right We must meet tho danger In a solid phalanx; and stand unflinching ly against It Let "Vive free lunch!" be our watchword, and let us battle to tno death, If need be, rather than allow our liberties thus to be wrenched from our grasp. Hera Is a verbatim copy of a letter re ceived yesterday by State Superintendent of Instruction Ackerman: "Stony Fork, Tioga County, Pa., Jan. 17. Dear Sir: Will you kindly send me a list of questions such as Oregon 'country school teachers' answer or try to answer in examination? We are intending to move to Oregon, soon, and my daughter wants to teach as soon as she can. I may teach again, too. I'm going there partly for my health. "Kindly answer me tho following ques tions: "First What school books are the most of the examination questions taken from? We want to 'study up.' "Second Are teachers scarce near the large places, as The Dalles, Wasco Coun ty; Corvallls, Benton County, and Eugene, Lano County? What salary do they get In the country near those pjaces? Where In Oregon do they get the largest pay? Why? "Third Are married women allowed to teach there, earn and own property, the same as single women? "Fourth Is there much chance near any large place for an old ex-teacher to teach select school? I may not be able to get a certificate there at first, as It has been 16 years since I taught school, but I've kept Interested In books since, and I help my 14-year-old daughter with her studies yet. My health is poor and has been very poor, and I'vo had lots of trouble, so of course I'll have to study "lots." "Fifth What will all of the books cost, please, a book on teaching Included? We'd like a large history, too, similar to Par sons' Popular History of the United States. "Sixth At what age do girls begin teaching and how long are tho school terms In Benton, Wasco and Lane Coun ties? What months? "Seventh Do teachers have to board around? Is there much danger from In dians or wild animals or anything? If so, kindly tell us what and where it's the most dangerous, as we want to keep out of too much danger, of course. We'll be very grateful for any Information about Oregon schools, Industries, etc., or any thing. I want my children to attend the Agricultural College there as soon as they can. Kindly excuse pencil writing, as my Ink is spilled." In Praise of Ballades. Pall Mall Gazette. Give me the gay ballade Where mirth flits to and fro. Where thought' is not too glad For a wave of cheerful woe Resurgent from below Like sea-wind through a rosery; Sonnets are staid and slow The gay ballade for me. The epic Is y-clad In gold and purple glow; The dramatist must pad Whether he will or no; Let his plangent trumpets blow. And his pennons flutter free With the glamor of long ago The gay ballade for me. The love of lass and lad, A lilt for the twinkling toe. The merest glance at the sad In the music's ebb and flow. The sound of scythes a-mow, A hint of a gallantry. Bright eyes and a. neck of snow The gay ballade for me. Lady, I do not know Your taste In poesy Scott, Wordsworth. Milton, Poof The gay ballade for me.