nik Gaffney
A collection of photos laid out from an album.
STUFF
Storing, preserving memories
I HAVE BEEN ABUNDANTLY BLESSED, AND I AM TRULY GRATEFUL. BUT I ALSO
REMEMBER THE BURDEN WE HAD IN DISPERSING MY FAMILY’S POSSESSIONS WHEN
THEY DOWNSIZED FROM A FIVE STORY HOUSE, FILLED TO THE BRIM, TO A TWO STORY
CONDOMINIUM. IT TOOK US YEARS AND LOTS OF VACATION TIME TO DO THE WORK.
By ann WhITe
I am in my 70s and looking ahead. At
what point do our treasures become a bur-
den? I have a house full of stuff. Granted,
some of it is junk and clutter, but many
items have stories behind them. I feel like
I am the guardian of treasures passed on to
me. It is not a materialistic attachment but
an acceptance that I am the keeper of our
family history.
I am one of seven children, and we were
all blessed with more family stuff than we
could manage. Just because it is old doesn’t
mean we need to keep it, either. My attach-
ment is to memories of my grandparents
and parents, the comfort and importance
they placed on them. In addition, after 45
years of marriage and two children, we
added substantially to the quantity and the
magnitude of stuff and memories.
I have been abundantly blessed, and I
am truly grateful. But I also remember the
burden we had in dispersing my family’s
possessions when they downsized from a
five story house, filled to the brim, to a two
story condominium. It took us years and
lots of vacation time to do the work.
After my dad died and mom moved to
assisted living, we gathered at the condo-
minium. We amicably took turns choosing
items one by one. We had an appraisal and
knew the deflated value for tax purposes.
We all walked away with personally mean-
ingful treasures of roughly equal value to
each of us.
After mom passed, our sibling unit
shifted. There was no more competition
for our parent’s attention, harkening a new
relationship with each other. We became
closer. The big family home is gone, and I
had hoped that my home would fill the gap
and provide the venue for classic family
gatherings.
Then my husband died, I returned to live
in Portland and COVID hit. So now it’s
just me and my little dog, rattling around in
this big house, playing classical music all
day to fill the void. Times have changed and
we are all dispersed, living separate lives.
But back to my reality — what do I do
with all this stuff? For one thing, I only
have two children and four grandchildren.
My daughter has a furnished home, and
my son lives in New York City in a small
apartment.
He has filled part of my real estate (base-
ment, garage and closets) with things for
safe keeping until he has more space. My
son loved ceramics in high school and at
university he was a prolific artist. Our home
is adorned with his treasures, vases, jars,
sculptures. Rather than crafting small tiles
to test the glazes, he made something prac-
tical. There are boxes of his tea or sake cup
samples in the basement.
See Page 16
Thursday, June 30, 2022 // 11