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THE ASTORIAN • THuRSdAy, AuguST 29, 2019
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IN ONE EAR • ELLEDA WILSON
‘I’M JUST STOKED’
et another peculiarly fascinating competition took
place in Finland last weekend: The Air Guitar
World Championships, held in the little town of Oulu,
where the event has been held for the last 24 years, Yle.fi
reports (bit.ly/Ouluplay).
The winner was voice-over actor Rob “The Marquis”
Messel (robmessel.com), reportedly from Portland. “I’m
honored, and I’m just stoked,” he told Yle. He is pictured,
courtesy of Eeva Riihelä/Lehtikuva via Yle.fi, and inset,
from the AGWC video (bit.ly/AGWC2019).
But wait: Rob Messel’s website and Twitter feed (twit-
ter.com/robmessel) both say he’s from Vancouver, Wash-
ington. Well, the Ear couldn’t resist writing to him to offer
congratulations … and to ask him where he’s really from,
and what the competition means to him.
“I do, in fact, live in Vancouver, Washington,” he clar-
ified, “but developed the habit of saying Portland when I
travel, so as to not be confused for a Canadian :).”
“The purpose of the air guitar world championships is
to unite people from all countries in the spirit of world
peace,” the new champion explained. “If you’re holding
an air guitar, then you cannot hold a gun at the same time.”
“It’s an art form, and it’s a fun spectacle, but this mes-
sage of peace is what means the most to me,” he added,
“and what I want to share with the world, especially being
a veteran of the war in Afghanistan.”
Y
ONE PIECE AT A TIME
LOCAL BREVITIES
rom the Saturday, Aug. 29, 1885 edition of The Daily
Morning Astorian:
• Clara Louise Kellogg is said to have refused more
offers of marriage than any other woman in America.
Note: Ms. Kellogg (1842-1916) — described by Ency-
clopedia.com as an “American (high) soprano, impresa-
rio ... who worked to bring opera to the American stage”
— was coming to Astoria with her troupe in the near
future, so the publicity machine was already winding up.
She is pictured, inset.
The woman had endurance, and was a true workhorse;
for example, during the 1874-1875 season, she sang for
125 opera performances. It was quite a coup for Astoria
to attract this internationally renowned diva. But, by the
time of her 1885 appearance in Astoria, she was wind-
ing down.
She married her former manager’s nephew, Carl Stra-
kosch, in 1887, and retired from the stage. You can read
her autobiography, “Memoirs of an American Prima
Donna” at bit.ly/CLKbio
• Coming to Astoria: The Largest! The Grandest!
The Greatest! Old John Robinson’s 10 Big Shows
Combined!
Note: Aside from the unfortunate (and large) menag-
erie, and the Museum of Living Wonders, the extrava-
ganza featured Occupational Safety and Health Admin-
istration nightmare acts such as: Zenobia (“hurled 200
feet through space by ancient Rome’s terrific war engine,
the catapult!); Aida (“who dives, head foremost, from the
dome of the canvas into a net 100 feet below); Mademoi-
selle Ella Zola (“high wire queen, walks blindfolded with
feet encased in baskets”); Mademoiselle Zerate (“ceil-
ing walker); Tuila Family (unicycle riders and skaters on
stilts”); Viola (the Hindoo snake charmer); plus so much
more.
And, “don’t fail to be on time to witness the $300,000
Free Street Pageant,” with 31 chariots, bagpipers,
four steam musical wagons, mounted trumpeters, 100
mounted knights, a calliope, steam organs, opera singers.
… It must have been a helluva sight.
• Apropos of nothing: East Portland has
passed an ordinance prohibiting cows from running at
large …
Note: Positively sensible, compared to other Rose
City rules, which also prohibit whistling underwater (is
this even possible?), roller skating into bathrooms and
walking down the street with your shoes untied. (bit.ly/
oddrose)
F
F
WHERE IS IT?
BE IN A MOVIE!
ince 2014, the Ear has been trying to find the answer
to a genuine Astoria history mystery: What happened
to the Tapiola Park fighter jet? Yes, in the early 1960s,
there really was a genuine fighter jet there for kids to
play on.
Here’s what we know so far, courtesy of Jonah
Dart-McLean, Astoria Parks Maintenance supervisor,
who directed the Ear to the 2016 Astoria Parks Master
Plan (bit.ly/APRDplan, page 516), which provided the
photo shown, and says the following:
“At some time in the late 1950s and early 1960s, a
U.S. Air Force F86-E Sabre jet was on display at Tap-
iola. The jet was placed there by Mayor Harry Stein-
bock. It was at the site prior to 1960, and was eventually
removed due to damage from years of children playing
on the plane.
“At one point, volunteers built a pedestal on which the
plane was mounted. The jet was marked with the Serial
No. 13042 (actually, it’s 13024) which was stationed at
Nellis Air Force Base in Nevada in 1950s for training
with the 3595th Fighter Group, 3598th Fighter Squadron.
It was destroyed in a mid-air collision near Las Vegas
Nevada on Jan. 8, 1953.
“The date of collision and the dates of location at Tap-
iola raise questions as to whether the crashed plane was
restored or the serial number was representative and not
the actual plane number.”
So … not only is the final disposition of the jet
unknown, we’re not even sure which jet it actually
was.
So far, the Clatsop County Historical Society, Asto-
ria Parks and Recreation and Rosemary Johnson (for-
mer city planner and Astoria historian) have said they
don’t know what happened to it. Do you?
If so, please contact the Ear at 971-704-1718 or ewil-
son@dailyastorian.com. Inquiring minds really want to
know.
S
xtras are needed for a feature action/comedy/sci-fi
film, “Vireality” (bit.ly/IMDBvirealty), produced,
directed and edited by Astoria High School grad James
Strecker.
The call time is 6:30 p.m. Wednesday at the Performing
Arts Center, 588 16th St.; filming is from approximately 7
to 8 p.m. Pictured, James Strecker (left) and Joe Scott in a
photo by Brian Maneely.
“Astoria friends, or anyone, really … I need extras!”
James wrote. “Come be in a staged studio audience (for a
fake talk show scene). Applaud, laugh, boo ... there may be
a line of dialogue in it for you.”
Those age 16 or older are preferred, wearing clothing
with no logos. Bring your friends, too.
“Snacks and water will be provided afterward,” he
added, “and anyone who shows will get their name in the
movie credits and online on IMDb. See you there!”
Questions? Call 503-791-1605.
arest sighting ever, nearshore, of a beaked whale,”
marine biologist Carrie Newell, CEO of Whale
Research Eco Excursions in Depoe Bay, posted Aug.
17 on the WREE Facebook page.
“Yesterday on the 10 a.m. and noon trips my cap-
tain, Joe, radioed me and asked what weird whale are we
looking at?” she explained. “I saw this copper-colored,
bulbous-headed, around 15-foot whale, and was baffled.
I went through my 37 years of whale knowledge in my
head, and just could not figure out for sure what weird
cetacean it was.” A photo from the WREE post is shown.
She called friend and whale expert John Calam-
bokidis, who thought it might be a Cuvier’s beaked
whale, but he asked a beaked whale expert to chime in,
as well.
Beaked whales are usually in deep water, she noted.
This one was in only 27 feet of water, just 100 feet off-
shore. They “also only eat squid,” so she checked a fish
cleaning station, and “sure enough the lingcod were
packed with squid in their stomachs.”
As it turned out, “the expert thinks it is a Bairds
beaked whale (bit.ly/bairdbeak),” the marine biologist
reported, which are around 35 feet long. “But the beak
is still a little too short,” she added, “and the whale must
be young, since it is only around 15 feet long. Incredi-
ble sighting!”
‘R
WELCOME HOME
ell, look what made its way back to the Astor
Street Opry Company Playhouse!” Judith
Niland (pictured inset) wrote in an email.
“A few weeks ago, Hank and Kristina Sohler of Asto-
ria attended a performance of the 35th season of ‘Shang-
haied in Astoria‘ bearing gifts. That night, they presented
to the company on stage two hand-built shadow boxes
filled with little brightly painted clay versions of all 26
characters of ‘Shanghaied’ they found at a garage sale in
Hammond a few years back.
“Unbeknownst to the Sohlers, these little 4-inch dolls
were created by me — a ‘Shanghaied’ veteran and local
artist — back in 1997 for the very first raffle baskets given
away to raise funds for the long-running nonprofit.
“It was a little exciting to see my art from over 20 years
ago. You never know where it goes until it comes back.
I really appreciate the Sohlers’ generosity to bring them
home. And, I will always wonder who took the time to cre-
ate the beautiful shadow boxes to house these little guys
— another mystery, I guess.”
“These one-of-a-kind originals now have a permanent
place at the ASOC Playhouse, and will be on display for
all to enjoy,” Judith added. “Stop in and see for yourself!
The 35th season of ‘Shanghaied in Astoria’ runs until Sept.
14.”
‘W
eeling frustrated and disgusted about the estimated
18 billion pounds of plastic that enters the ocean each
year? Aside from not using plastic bags, etc., there is one
painless, easy little thing you can do every day to help clean
up the mess one piece at a time: Go to freetheocean.com
“Simply answer the daily trivia question, and we’ll
remove a piece of plastic,” the website says. You can
even set it up to receive a daily email reminder to play.
Here’s how it works: Money generated from advertis-
ing on the site is used to pay Free the Ocean’s partner, Sus-
tainable Coastlines, Hawaii, a nonprofit, to remove plas-
tic debris.
“All of our small actions,” Free the Ocean founder
Founder Mimi Ausland (pictured, inset) noted, “when put
together, will create big impact.”
E
NAME THAT CETACEAN
DR. WISTAR’S BALSAM
een in the Aug. 29, 1883 edition of The Daily Asto-
rian: “Have Dr. Wistar’s Balsam of Wild Cherry
always at hand. It cures coughs, colds, bronchitis, whoop-
ing cough, croup, influenza, consumption (tuberculosis)
and all throat and lung complaints. 50 cents and $1 ($25
now) a bottle.”
This extremely popular bit of addictive feel-good
quackery was made from “cherry bark, alcohol and opi-
ates” (bit.ly/wistarcherry). Concocted around 1840 by
Henry Wister (or Wistar) — who may or may not have
been a doctor — this particular nostrum was on the market
for over 100 years.
S