B2 THE ASTORIAN • SATURDAY, MAY 18, 2019 Person hurt over their omission in sister-in-law’s obit CRV: ‘It was in the blue car that we started off on our many family adventures’ Continued from Page B1 Dear Annie: I am in tioned in obits. Really, my 80s and recently lost I’m their last living aunt: my beloved sister-in-law, How do you forget to who was 90. She mar- acknowledge that per- ried my brother when son? How can this breach I was just a child, and be fi xed? — Hurting in we had been close ever Ohio since. Aside from the Dear Hurting in many things I did for her, Ohio: What a remarkable I loved her dearly as she bond you and your sister- was the last of my ties to in-law shared. It sounds my brothers, who as though there are have all passed still some pretty DEAR on. So that leaves raw feelings here, ANNIE me as the only one and you might be left. My problem focusing on being lies with her chil- left out of the dren, with whom obituary because I was very close. it’s an easier pain I told her children to grapple with what a wonderful than the enormous job they did taking ANNIE LANE pain of grief. Still, Creators care of their mom. it’s not fair to hold Syndicate Inc. I was there during a grudge against her last days, but your niece and more importantly, I was nephews. They’re griev- there for her after my ing, too. They just lost brother’s death. I took her their mother. on errands and doctors’ Regarding your wish visits, etc. My niece and for friends to reach out to nephews always tell me you: I encourage you to how much they love me, reach out to them to seek and the feeling is mutual. the healing you need. But when the obit for Remember, the fact my sister-in-law came that your name wasn’t out, I was shocked to fi nd mentioned in her obituary that they never acknowl- doesn’t erase the imprint edged me as a survi- you left on each other. vor. I was devastated. It I’m so sorry for your loss. hurt me so much to think Dear Annie: Recently, they forgot to mention I excused myself at a me. It would have meant restaurant to use the so much, as a lot of my restroom. When I arrived, friends didn’t know my another man was leav- former last name (the ing the stall. I went in, surname I shared with only to be “greeted” by my sister-in-law), and so the fact that he walked none of them knew that away without fl ushing. I I, too, was in mourning. didn’t call him out on it, Even though they apol- but felt like it. Why are ogized for the error of some people so disgust- omitting me, I just can’t ingly lazy? — Dismayed seem to get over it. This in North Carolina is eating at me all the Dear Dismayed: Well, time. I really do love that sounds like quite an them, but am I deluding awful greeting. What a myself? Did I think I was slob! To all my readers: more important to them Please fl ush the toilet. It than I really was? I was only takes a second and told by one of them that could save someone from they didn’t think a sister- having to walk into a dis- in-law was usually men- gusting mess. Changes Change is such a over- whelming experience in our lives, the few constants can take on weighted meaning. So much has changed since 2001. When Lindsay was born I worked at home as a writer, but soon after I went back to school to become a nurse. The blue CRV took me through many a snowstorm to arrive at school and work in Longview and brought me safe at home again. Yet most of the time it was the family car. Lindsay and her younger sister, Grace, attended the Astoria School of Ballet for years, and the little blue CRV was my wife’s reliable transport across the river and back late at night. It was in the blue car that we started off on our many fam- ily adventures — sledding on Mt. Hood and huckle- berry picking on Mt. Adams. In the great Hanuk- kah Eve Storm of 2006, it got caught in rapidly rising fl ood waters before I could pull it out of my garage. We dried it out and it was not much worse for wear. It was stolen in 2012 from the street outside the hospi- tal in Longview, while I was working. I came out after my night shift to fi nd an empty parking spot where it had been. It was such a humble and unassuming car that I couldn’t believe any- one would steal it. Miraculously, it was recovered by police in Van- couver just before it got chopped up for parts. When I gave Lindsay her fi rst driving lesson in the Rosburg School parking lot, it was in the CRV that we had bought just after she was born. I sat in the passen- ger seat giving her instruc- tions, while glancing back- ward, thinking about the car seat that used to always be strapped in the back. Lindsay Hunt has found a new creative energy with the amazing Ilwaco Jazz Band. When she got her license, the blue CRV became “her” car. She put a hula guy on the dashboard and drove off to school with her younger sister and our exchange stu- dent riding along. I trusted her with this responsibility somehow. It wasn’t the car — with its all wheel drive and its airbags and antilock brakes — but the girl driv- ing it. At the start of her senior year, Lindsay came back from one of her many trips across the state as part of her student leadership activ- ities renewed with ambi- tion. She wanted to take jazz band in Ilwaco. Naselle High School didn’t offer jazz band and she was want- ing to challenge herself and grow as a saxaphone player, to try something new. I was skeptical. The class started at 7 a.m., and that become the symbol of Lind- say’s ambition and inde- pendence for me, as well as her reliability. She even checks the oil — because at 313,000 miles, it does burn a little. The back hatch is stuck shut and the air condi- tioner doesn’t work, but the plucky little thing just keeps on running. In the fall, Lindsay will be off to Washington State University and will leave the little blue CRV at home — parking fees on cam- pus are almost as much as tuition. That will work out fi ne, because her younger sister starts driving lessons soon. Ed Hunt is a writer and registered nurse who blogs on medical issues at redtri- age.com and on other sub- jects at theebbtide.blog- spot.com. He lives in Grays River, Washington. meant she’d need to leave the house by 6 a.m. every weekday morning for the long drive. Most teenagers like to sleep in and I didn’t think this adventure would last. Instead, she unerringly wakes before anyone else in the house and gets her- self out the door before the sunrise. The rewards for that effort have been enormous, she’s made new friends, grown as a musician, per- forms amazing solos during the band’s performances. She also takes advantage of the Grays Harbor Col- lege facilities in Ilwaco for her Running Start college classes. Her senior year and she is technically attending classes at two high schools — Ilwaco and Naselle — while earning college credits. The blue CRV has THE ASTORIAN CALL TODAY to place your ad 503-325-3211 or 800-781-3214 Email: classifieds@dailyastorian.com Web: www.dailyastorian.com THE DEADLINE FOR CLASSIFIED ADS is noon the day before your ad is scheduled to run All classifieds require pre-payment CLASSIFIEDINDEX Classified NOTICES MARINE RENTALS Special Notices ............................. 104 Boats for Sale................................. 251 Public Notices ............................... 107 Boating Parts & Accessories ..... 254 Announcements .......................... 110 Boats Wanted ................................ 257 Boat Trailers ................................... 260 PERSONALS Marine Supplies & Equip. .......... 266 Lost & Found ................................. 181 Boat/RV Storage ........................... 269 Personals ........................................ 184 Fund-raisers ................................... 188 RVs & Trailers RVs & Travel Trailers ............ 301-307 AUTOMOTIVE Campers, Utility Trailers .... 310-313 Antiques/Classic Vehicles ......... 201 Automobiles .................................. 204 REAL ESTATE SUVs/Trucks .......................... 207-210 Open Houses ................................. 501 4WD .................................................. 213 For Sale ................................... 504-513 Vans .................................................. 216 Lots & Acreage .............................. 516 ATVs/Motorcycles ........................ 219 Income Property .......................... 519 Truck/Auto Parts .......................... 222 Manufactured Homes ................ 522 Detailing ......................................... 225 Commercial Property ................. 525 Tires & Wheels ............................... 228 Real Estate Wanted ..................... 531 coa st weekend Y ou r loca l gu ide to A rt, En terta in m en t, Food & Fu n Properties for Rent ............. 601-613 Rooms & Roommates................. 616 Commercial Rental ...................... 619 Vacation Rentals .......................... 622 Storage Space ............................... 628 Wanted to Rent ............................ 634 RV/Mobile Home Space ............ 637 PETS/LIVESTOCK Animal Boarding .......................... 701 Feed-Hay-Grain ............................ 704 Pets & Supplies ............................. 710 Horses & Tack ................................ 713 If it doesn’t sell in two weeks, we’ll give you HELP WANTED Help Wanted .................................. 651 APPLIANCES & EQUIP. 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