A5
THE DAILY ASTORIAN • TuESDAY, JANuARY 29, 2019
How should I handle his family?
Dear Annie: My husband rude to me. My husband’s sis-
of two years was divorced ter finally came around and
from his ex six years ago. apologized, recognizing that
They had no children. The the ex’s being around all the
divorce was the result of infi- time does pose a problem.
delity on his part. When we
I love him, and I hate to see
began to date, he was
him hurting like this.
DEAR
very upfront with me
How should I han-
ANNIE
dle his family when
about his dysfunc-
tional marriage and
we both feel like out-
casts? — Outcast
about how his infidel-
ity was the result of
Dear
Outcast:
his being shut down
Though you can’t
by his wife in the
control other people’s
bedroom for several
actions, you can con-
years. They split, and ANNIE LANE trol your reactions to
Creators
other people. Try to be
she bought a house 1
Syndicate Inc.
sympathetic to your
mile away from him.
husband’s ex-wife.
He was honest about
what happened and was very Clearly, she has struggled to
move on from their marriage.
clear he had nothing to hide.
She has suddenly become By focusing all of her energy
all about “the family.” It is as if on his family, she is wasting
she is taking out her anger over opportunities to meet a new
the divorce on me. 1) I wasn’t partner and move on with
the girl he was seeing back her life. As far as how your
then. 2) It isn’t her business.
in-laws are treating your hus-
Now it has been made per- band and you, all you can do
fectly clear that his family rec- is lend your support and love
ognizes her as family and not to him.
me, and he is also treated like
It sounds as if you’re off to
an outcast. She is front and a good start toward repairing
center of everything, attending your relationship and, in turn,
all family events.
your husband’s relationship
I have tried to be nice and with his family, given his sister
civil to her, but she is always extended an olive branch and
apologized. Try as best you
can to be the bigger person and
accept her apology. Let go of
any resentment you hold. Let’s
hope that in the future, he will
once again feel close to his
family. As is always the case,
communication is key. When
your feelings and expecta-
tions are clear — and you are
clear on everybody else’s —
then the situation will go more
smoothly.
Dear Annie: This is in
response to “Blindsided by
Blue,” who’s losing her eye-
sight from looking at a com-
puter screen all day. Many
years ago, the company I
worked for rented office space
to a lighting company. The
woman running the lighting
company suggested that we
put some sort of secondary
lighting by our computers so
our eyes could adjust to differ-
ent levels of light. I did this. I
have been retired for over 20
years, and I still have a lamp
by my computer. I’ve had no
loss of eyesight. I hope this
helps. — Still Seeing
Dear Still Seeing: Thank
you for your insightful (no pun
intended) advice on protecting
eyesight.
TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE
By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc.
ARIES (March 21-April 19). There is a social adjust-
ment to be made — an addition or subtraction to
help you stay on the road of health. Pinpoint what
needs to be done, make a plan and execute it. This
won’t take time so much as will.
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). The hard worker will
win against the “gifted” person every time. And if you
have both going for you in a category, it’s something
to bank on. Believe in yourself, and put your resourc-
es behind it.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20). Where the physical
space is tight, you can make emotional space. Think:
passengers on a plane who wear headphones.
Where emotional space is tight, make physical space.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). Your friends
are the ones who stand by you when you need it,
when you don’t, when you’re right, and when you’re
wrong. Your best friends are the ones who tell you
you’re wrong and stand by you anyway.
GEMINI (May 21-June 21). You could distill things
down to dollars and cents, but it wouldn’t be an
accurate assessment of the situation — far from it. In
fact, mostly the situation is about invaluable things.
CANCER (June 22-July 22). You’re not about to use
guilt as a tactic. While it may work well enough, it’s
just not an emotion you want people to feel. Either
they get you, or they miss out. Guilt doesn’t need to
play into the equation in the least.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). To get momentum, there
must be a push. That push comes today and not
a moment too soon. You’re in a good position. It’s
going to be even better once you use this push and
get to work.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). For today’s approach
to relationships, the most critical things to get right
all begin with a “T,” that is to say, truthfulness, tone
and timing. Be honest, keep it light, stay aware and
wonderful things will happen.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). While many can do what
they’re told, fewer can figure it out on their own and
even fewer can see the opportunity on their own
and then figure it out from there. You’re in the final
category, and without much competition.
FRANK AND ERNEST
BLONDIE
THATABABY
SALLY FORTH
PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN
B.C.
LOLA
DILBERT
SIX CHIX
BIZARRO
MUTTS
NON SEQUITUR
BABY BLUES
WIZARD OF ID
ZITS
ROSE IS ROSE
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). The control freak is
not very much fun. Why? Because this person is try-
ing to insure against mystery — every risk calculated,
every move audited. What a bore. Embrace mystery,
relinquish some control, have fun.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). Adults usually have
a purpose for moving and rarely wander without a
destination. But if you have the time for it, such wan-
dering could benefit you today, as it will allow you to
access an unreasonable sort of knowing.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Patience and long-term
thinking are the orders of the day. The big problems
will be solved through creating systems that will
work for you every day. The big problems will be
solved over time.
TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (Jan. 30). You’re not wor-
ried what people think of you, which liberates you
to either experiment and try new approaches and
identities or to go deeper into the old ones — what-
ever you want. You’re incredibly free, and yet more
purposeful than ever. The trust you have in yourself
translates to awesome confidence and action. Aries
and Cancer adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 4, 42,
20, 1 and 17.