6A
FEATURES
Traumatic past remains
Dear Annie: I want to tell you to “get over it.”
my story. My father was an alco-
I keep to myself and tell no
holic wife-beater. My crib was in one of my terrible childhood
a corner of my parents’ bedroom, and unhappy life because I don’t
and I have a vivid memory of him believe that anyone would under-
beating her as I stood in my crib stand or sympathize. Because I
crying in terror. He turned to me present a normal face to the world,
I’m sure people would
and warned that if I didn’t
DEAR
be surprised to learn how
shut up, I would get some
traumatic my childhood
of the same. I sobbed
ANNIE
was.
myself to sleep without
I write this letter in the
anyone to comfort or reas-
sure me.
hope that my sad story
Later, when I was a
will inspire your readers
preteen, my mother and
to be kind to everyone
elder sister worked, so
they meet in life because
during the summer, I
an individual’s heavy bur-
Lane
den, like mine, may not
was left alone at home. I Annie
Creators
Syndicate Inc.
be obvious. A little kind-
became afraid of being
ness, a warm gesture or
alone at home and con-
fided my fear to my mother, hop- even a smile might go a long way
ing for reassurance. Instead, her toward making an unhappy per-
misguided attempt to do so was son’s day. — My Sad Story
Dear Sad Story: In the words
to say, “But who would possibly
need you?” That left me feeling of Joan Didion, “We tell ourselves
stories in order to live.” Stories
worthless and unloved.
To escape, I married too early help us make sense of a sense-
and unwisely. Predictably, because less world, of the hurt and heart-
I was incapable of a good relation- ache that seem to come at random.
ship, my husband abandoned me But sometimes stories can stop us
after years of a troubled marriage. from really living, and in this case,
And today, my sister — still suf- it sounds as though your fixation
fering from sibling rivalry, even on the story of your past is keeping
though our parents are long gone you from a brighter future.
— is unsympathetic and tells me
Witnessing your father abus-
ing your mother when you were
just a baby must have been awful,
and I don’t mean to discount
that trauma. If you want to work
through that, pick up the phone
and make a therapy appointment
today. Or try BetterHelp or Talk-
space, online therapy tools. Also,
rather than assume your sister is
speaking out of sibling rivalry
when she tells you to “get over it,”
consider that she may be speaking
from love, in her own way. Even if
she isn’t, you won’t be worse off
for choosing to assume the best.
Once you embrace the fact that
you are the author of your own
destiny, you might just surprise
yourself with some wonderful plot
twists.
Dear Annie: Seeing as you
have a wide audience, would you
please pass this along to the folks
who put the recycling number on
their packages: Would you please
make the numbers big enough to
read without having to use a mag-
nifying glass? — Avid Jackson-
ville, Fla., Recycler
Dear Avid Jacksonville Recy-
cler: Your best bet in the mean-
time might be to try to memorize
— or keep a list handy of — what
types of materials can and can’t be
recycled.
THE DAILY ASTORIAN • MONDAY, APRIL 9, 2018
TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE
By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc.
ARIES (March 21-April 19). One thing leads
to another. If you want to change the “an-
other” your best bet is to start with the “one
thing.” And if you don’t know the source off the
top of your head, this is a fine time to retrace
your steps.
duplicate the success later.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20). Working
together with another for a common goal will
produce a bond, but it’s not as strong as the
connection you make when you team up with
people who share your values and principles.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). You don’t
have to ask people what they value, because
you can tell by what they talk about and how.
Also, there’s no reason to try to hide your id-
iosyncrasies, as they will only help you learn
more about people.
GEMINI (May 21-June 21). Avoid casting
a wide net in hopes of dragging back in
something or someone that can help you. Be
strategic instead. What’s your ideal scenario?
Work backward from that idea.
CANCER (June 22-July 22). You’ll have
the courage to speak your mind. That’s a
non-issue. But is it right to do so? You’ll be
wondering how far you should go with the
truth. If being honest is going to wound some-
one, is it really necessary?
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). Cats will turn any-
thing into a toy: a feather, some fluff, the sock.
... Play is a mood, and when it hits as strongly
as it will today, the whole world becomes a
toy store.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). You’ll do well
to think in terms of relationships instead of
transactions. Transactions happen when
people carry out their roles. But no one is
a role. Everyone is a person, playing a role.
Relationships transcend roles.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). Not only is it very
rare to succeed on the first try but also today
it would be unlucky to do so. It’s far luckier to
make lots of mistakes all along so that you
may experience the entire learning curve and
FRANK AND ERNEST
BLONDIE
THATABABY
SALLY FORTH
PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN
B.C.
LOLA
DILBERT
SIX CHIX
BIZARRO
MUTTS
NON SEQUITUR
BABY BLUES
WIZARD OF ID
ZITS
ROSE IS ROSE
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Meaning
is subjective. So there’s no need to go
searching for it, or expect to stumble upon it.
It’s something that each person must create,
determine and assign.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). There are
two futures, the one you make and the one
you don’t. Today you’ll spend energy on
both, combing through to make sure you’re
ultimately claiming the right one.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). It’s not what
you say but how you say it that will matter.
Choosing the right words does help, and it’s
much easier to do this when you have the
intention of helping the other person.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). How can it be
true that happiness is always in the present
moment? You’ll time travel through your
memory and your projections of the future,
and there’s happiness to be mined in both
places.
TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (April 10). You’ll
enjoy a life of moderation for the next six
weeks. Then the intensity turns up in one
area of your life. You’ll specialize your focus
and be celebrated (and compensated) for
the remarkable skill you hone through the
rest of this solar return. Conversation sparks
an adventure in August. October brings a
commitment. Taurus and Leo adore you. Your
lucky numbers are: 1, 13, 33, 40 and 18.