APRIL 5, 2018 // 9
cocktail party for 15 with storytelling by
ADHDA Vice President Patsy Oser and
the opportunity to “Get YOUR Jane On”
and stroll the catwalk yourself. Make sure
to bring plenty of dollar bills — there’s a
prize awaiting the Jane who gets the most
tips stuffed into his/her garters by the end
of the night.
Cat Dance
Inspiration for the Revue came to
association President Dulcye Taylor at a
2010 Main Street America conference.
“This little lady from Iowa got up
on the stage and said, ‘You know what
we did in our town? We put our men in
dresses and had a fashion show — it was
funny, it was good, and we raised a lot of
money.’ And I looked at the person I was
with and said, ‘That would totally work
in Astoria.’”
Taylor returned home and immediately
set to recruiting, and the following April,
Astoria’s 200th-birthday celebration
kicked off with the 2011 Bicentennial Re-
vue and Jane Barnes Cat Dance, named in
honor of the first European woman to set
foot in Oregon Country.
Barnes, a “flaxen-haired, blue-eyed
daughter of Albion,” was reputed to
have caused quite a stir among the den-
izens of Fort George in the early 1800s,
and so, too, did the event that bore her
name. The first Revue proved a surprise
hit, and from there, the crowds grew
larger, the catwalks grew longer, and
the participants grew more brazen and
uninhibited. And underneath the makeup
and the padding just may be someone
you know.
“We don’t generally release the full
names of everybody that’s walking,”
Heath said — most of the Gentleman
Janes appear under their “stripper names,”
which is to say the names of their first pet
and the street they grew up on — “but you
might recognize a librarian, a driver, a
barista, a real estate agent, a police officer
… Everybody will recognize somebody.”
New wrinkles
The eighth Revue adds a few new wrin-
kles to the event.
For the first time, a house band will
provide musical backing, not to mention
the opportunity for some of the Janes to
exercise their pipes, as well as their stems.
The band, Plaid Spandex, consists of
Brian Bovenizer and The New Old Stock
and Friends, featuring Luke Ydstie, Olaf
Ydstie, Jeff Munger, Jamie Greenan and
Kati Claborn.
And after successful runs at the Astor
Street Opry Company and the Astoria
Events Center, the Revue has found a
new venue — a highly appropriate spot,
COLIN MURPHEY PHOTOS
Bill Jablonski, left, and Jimmy Pearson, right, get fitted by Sarah Lu, center, for their Jane Barnes Revue outfits.
symbolic of the ADHDA’s mission to
“preserve the character of historic down-
town Astoria while promoting its health
and future.”
The Ruins at the Astor is located in the
lobby of The Astor Building, formerly the
Astor Hotel, built in 1921 but beset by
decades of natural and economic disas-
ters. Once thought beyond renovation, it
has experienced a resurgence under cur-
rent owner Paul Caruana, and the restored
opulence of the Astor’s expansive lobby
both offsets the delicious decadence on
display at the Jane Barnes Revue and re-
flects the moxie of the woman for whom
it’s named.
“It’s a celebration of the grit and deter-
mination and humor it must have taken for
Jane Barnes to be the first non-native wom-
an to make it out to Astoria,” said Heath.
“It’s a fashion show, it’s performance art,
it’s all of those things.” And besides that,
she added: “It’s just a lot of fun.”
Leave it to the people of Astoria to
really put the “fun” into “fundraiser.” CW
Bill Jablonski tries on a wig to go with his outfit.