6A FEATURES Ex is still in the picture Dear Annie: About two years should start to move on with their ago, my wife of 20 years, “Cyn- lives and shouldn’t hang around an thia,” and I divorced. Our two chil- ex’s family gatherings. I’m very torn. I want Beth to dren are grown and out of the house. Our divorce wasn’t the norm; we attend these events. However, if I did it without a lawyer or media- asked Cynthia to stop being around tor. Everything was civil; no one so much, it might get back to my family, and then Beth and I cheated or was abused. I DEAR would be deemed as spoil- think we both just changed ers in the family. But she over time. ANNIE may already be seen as an About four months after outcast by excluding her- the divorce, I met another self from these gatherings. woman, “Beth.” Hav- Is Beth having anxiety ing already had my cry, I over nothing, or should I decided to give it a shot. ask my ex not to be around Long story short, we were so much? — Ex In or Ex great for each other, and Lane Out now, a year and a half later, Annie Creators Syndicate Inc. Dear Ex In or Ex we’re engaged. Out: Your ex-wife was The problem is that Cynthia doesn’t really have a fam- a part of your family for 20 years, ily other than mine. My sister and and that bond doesn’t disappear the rest of my family are sym- once the ink dries on the divorce pathetic to Cynthia and want to papers. It’s understandable that she include her. I don’t mind being wants to stay in touch with her for- around her, but the awkwardness mer in-laws, and it’s understand- comes in when Beth and Cynthia able that they want to include her. attend the same family events. Beth But it’s important that your fiancee understands that it’s unavoidable really get to know and love your during big occasions, such as wed- family, and she’s having a hard time dings and funerals. But she feels doing so with your ex-wife around. that it isn’t normal for Cynthia to be Rather than disinvite Cynthia, talk around for our casual family gather- to your family members about your ings, which are more frequent. She concern and plan additional outings feels that once people divorce, they with just them and Beth. Once Beth feels more settled and secure with her place in the family, it will be easier for her to relax at family gath- erings, even when Cynthia is there. Dear Annie: My husband and I own a boat that takes tourists on short trips. Three years ago, he fell in love with the only woman on board. When I realized something was up, I said, “If she is so wonder- ful, what is stopping you from being with her?” Without hesitation, he said, “The age difference.” I have not been able to stop thinking about that every day for the past three years. I am becoming upset even writing this to you. She is not interested in him. I guess he is old enough to be her father. But what if he meets someone his own age? I think I’d better see my law- yer. What do you think? Should we get a divorce? — Seasick Dear Seasick: I can’t tell you whether you should get a divorce based on your letter. But I can tell you that you can’t keep living this way. One comment has been eat- ing away at you for three years, and you need to put a stop to that before it swallows you whole. Have you tried talking to your husband? In any case, I’d strongly recommend mar- riage counseling so you can open up the lines of communication. THE DAILY ASTORIAN • THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 21, 2017 TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. ARIES (March 21-April 19). When the sun rises, it rises for everyone and shines on all creatures alike. Those who feel special and above the rest will be humbled by the current cosmic climate in the best way possible. TAURUS (April 20-May 20). People don’t necessarily want to hear the most honest interpretation of things. What about compas- sion? What about catering the message to the audience? If you must talk hard facts, speak the truth and then duck. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). You could put something in the world that wasn’t there before. Note that creative ventures do require more than a good idea. They require time and study and practice. That said, a few minutes here and there will add up. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). The thing about chasing mirages is that no matter how much distance you cover, you’ll never arrive. Illusions threaten to waste your time. Separate actualities from fantasies, truth from fiction. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). Even if you have a self-driving car, you still can’t drive two of them at the same time. Choose. It may be difficult, as many options seem equal, but if you don’t make the choice now, someone will make it for you. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). You genu- inely want to do something well. Your attitude will appeal to others who have been mas- terful. In a stroke of luck more fortunate than money falling from the sky, the right teachers will be attracted to your potential. CANCER (June 22-July 22). Imagine if you believed that there was nothing wrong with you and there never has been, that nothing needed to be improved, that there was no “better,” only “different”: Would you then still make the same choice? AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). In some ways you are on your own, but this freedom has many perks. You can go in any direction you wish, for starters. Furthermore, your best guess is pretty stellar. Act on it and your luck will compound. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). Intellectual powers surge today. You enjoy thinking things through and coming up with the perfect explanation for why they are the way they are, or how they might become something else. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). When you can right a wrong situation you feel personally successful. Indeed you are! And those who help you celebrate achievements of justice are your true friends. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). You’re ready and willing to learn, and that’s not even the best part: There is someone very skilled who will be willing to teach you! You’re the one who must make the first approach, though. TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (Sept. 22). You’re exceptionally lucky over the next four weeks. In November, shake up your profes- sional scene some. What seems like a lateral move will actually lead to something much better. You don’t really know yourself until you try new things. Your personal life percolates with fresh activities and interests in 2018. Tau- rus and Virgo adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 9, 4, 42, 38 and 14. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). Do you get the sense that you’re coming into your own? Don’t dismiss this as merely a good mood. Instead heed the intuition as a harbinger of the very lucky times you’re stepping into. FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE