THE DAILY ASTORIAN • FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 8, 2017
FEATURES
Son won’t pay college loans
Dear Annie: My 28-year- bring up the loan.
old son, “Jerry,” will not pay
I am 66, and my husband
his college loan bill — which is 59. We are looking forward
is $85,000 — even though he to retiring in two years, but we
has a good job.
have this student loan hanging
Jerry insisted that he had over our heads. We both work
to go to an out-of-state col- for nonprofits, so our income is
certainly limited. Our
lege. Our agreement
DEAR
son has bought two
was that my husband
houses, bought two
and I would cover an
ANNIE
new cars, gotten mar-
amount equal to what
an in-state school
ried and had a child
and still won’t pay this
would’ve cost and that
loan. I have no idea
Jerry would pay the
difference when he fin-
what he has told his
wife, but I’m sure it’s
ished school. The total
not the truth.
student loan started
Lane
out at $130,000, and Annie
We have talked
Creators
Syndicate Inc.
with an attorney, but
we have paid it down
to $85,000. My hus-
I hate to have to sue
band, his stepfather, co-signed my son. He never calls, visits
for it, and we have been stuck or acknowledges our birthdays
with paying it for seven years. or Christmas — yet he adores
It turns out that Jerry didn’t his in-laws and his friends
even finish his degree. He from college. He calls them
flunked out of school and then his “college family.” I am so
fed up with this situation. I am
lied to us about it.
Despite our repeated efforts really tired of spending ther-
to talk to Jerry about this, he apy money talking about this.
ignores us. It has caused such I have sent presents and cards
heartbreak. He wouldn’t even and tried my best to be a good
let us visit and meet our only mother and grandmother —
granddaughter for over a year but to no avail. Should I just
because he doesn’t want to go ahead with the attorney?
talk to us — just in case we Any help would be so appreci-
ated. — Sad and Over It, With
Empty Pockets
Dear Empty Pockets:
Let’s see whether I’ve got this
straight: Your son agrees to pay
part of his student loans, per-
suades your husband to co-sign
the note for his loan, drops out
of college and then lies to you
and your husband about it. You
and your husband have paid
tens of thousands of dollars on
the note, while your son has
paid zero, but because you pro-
tected his credit rating, he was
able to buy two houses and two
cars. Is that right?
Obviously, he harbors
a great deal of resentment
against you, and refusing to
talk about the situation —
while he does nothing to own
up to his obligations — only
reinforces his permanent pout.
Yes, I would recommend hir-
ing a lawyer, if for no other
reason than to force him to talk
about it. Don’t sue him unless
you have to, but a strong let-
ter from an attorney could at
least bring him to the negoti-
ating table. Your only hope is
to start communicating, even if
you have to force your son to
the initial conversation.
3C
TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE
By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc.
ARIES (March 21-April 19). You already have
the tools for being perfectly happy in the mo-
ment, but those skills have been a bit neglected.
You can access great contentment through your
senses, emotions and detached observations.
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Sometimes the
strongest response is nothing at all. You’ve the
option to ignore just about anything you want to
today in your quest to focus exclusively on the
good, right and wholesome aspects of life.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20). Avoid getting stuck
in an unhelpful brain loop that includes a lot of
time-jumping. Stop and take note of how you’re
feeling, what you’re sensing right now and what’s
going on in your immediate environment.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). If you treat
today’s social opportunity as if it were the first
and only time people are going to get to hear
what you have to say, you’ll likely deliver the
message and overall impression you most want
to get across.
GEMINI (May 21-June 21). To meet today’s chal-
lenge, it will help if you ratchet up your power in
the situation. Power plays include keeping calm
and determining your own mood. If you refuse to
be reactive, others will conform to your mood.
CANCER (June 22-July 22). When it comes to
winning your affection, the people you don’t know
have an unfair advantage. With the people who
are familiar to you, inevitable and real problems
crop up, while of course you’ll be blind to the
negative qualities of people at a distance.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). Not everything has to be
assessed. In fact, overanalyzing can be tedious,
and if done publicly, doubly so. It can be much
cooler to have an experience without talking
about it. Luckily, the habit of judging can be
turned off as easily as the flick of a light switch.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). Ideas can appear
to be solid like mountains and continents when
they are really more like changing weather. Ideas
have an effect. But like a cloud crossing the sky,
it’s an effect that passes.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). Your feelings are not
the enemy. Emotions are messages that connect
you intimately to the adventure of being alive.
You might feel that you’re not in control of your
feelings, and you’re not, but you can certainly
manage them.
FRANK AND ERNEST
BLONDIE
THATABABY
SALLY FORTH
PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN
B.C.
LOLA
DILBERT
SIX CHIX
BIZARRO
MUTTS
NON SEQUITUR
BABY BLUES
WIZARD OF ID
ZITS
ROSE IS ROSE
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). Wanting things
to be different seems like the start of making
them better, but it isn’t necessarily so. Accep-
tance is more powerful than wanting. One recipe
for quick change: Accept it; move it along a bit;
repeat.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). A little surprise
will wake you up, invigorate you and stimulate
your curiosity. Too much surprise, however, cre-
ates anxiety and destabilization. You’ll be drawn
to situations that are unpredictable, but only to
a point.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Empathy and ap-
preciation will go a long way toward helping you
get comfortable and learn as much as you can
about a new situation. When people sense that
you feel and respect them, they’ll let you in.
TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (Sept. 9). Regard-
less of your relationship status, life is made
better through happier and more equitable
agreements with others. You’ll sharpen your
communication skills and apply those skills
to creating a better home life. You’ll execute a
masterful performance in October. Awe-inspiring
events happen in December and May. Aquarius
and Libra adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 3,
30, 14, 28 and 22.