The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current, June 16, 2017, Page 3C, Image 21

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Antidepressants suppress sex drive
Dear Annie: My husband effects of antidepressants.
Talk to your husband, tak-
takes antidepressants. He suffers
from severe anxiety and attention ing special care not to make him
deficit hyperactivity disorder. If he feel guilty or defensive about his
doesn’t take his pills, he’s tough to lack of sex drive. His doctor could
be around. He becomes depressed. suggest solutions — antidepres-
His attitude toward everything is sants that aren’t associated with
decreased sex drive, for
negative. He stays in bed.
example, or medications
He sleeps all day. It’s an
to treat erectile dysfunc-
ugly sight.
tion. A doctor might also
We met when we
refer you to a sex thera-
were in our 20s. Life was
pist or couples counselor
carefree when we fell in
to address any underly-
love. We were young,
ing issues in your sex
and all that mattered was
spending time together.
Dear Annie: “Sad
Most importantly, our
With So Much to
sex life was great. We’re Annie
Syndicate Inc.
Be Thankful For” cer-
currently in our late 30s.
tainly struck a chord
Nowadays, we have
“adult” problems — such as jobs, with your readers. I’d like to pro-
a mortgage and maintaining our vide perspective from someone
health. Those are normal obsta- in the same boat as “Sad Nana’s”
cles for any married couple.
My mother is the sole care-
Now include the fact that
my husband seems to have zero giver for my terminally ill father,
sex drive from the antidepres- who is in hospice. Mom refuses all
sants and, as a result, we never help — except for that provided
have sex. I want him to not be by her children. We, as Mom’s
depressed, but I also have needs. hired help, are all exhausted and
What should I do? — Amorous frustrated that our remaining time
with our dad is being orchestrated
Dear Amorous: Cruel but true by her.
“Sad Nana” needs to remem-
— decreased sex drive is among
the most commonly reported side ber that her children are losing
their father, just as she is losing
a spouse. Perhaps “Sad Nana’s”
children want to use their remain-
ing time with their dad visiting,
recalling cherished memories and
making peace with his imminent
Asking the children to pre-
pare meals, cook and clean for her
reduces their role in their dad’s
life to that of hired help. I suggest
that “Sad Nana” invest in profes-
sional services or take advantage
of those provided by Medicare or
perhaps her church family.
I imagine that “Sad Nana’s”
husband would rather she be by
his side as his wife rather than
nursemaid — and his children be
children rather than hired help.
“Sad Nana” made her choice;
she should avoid holding others
accountable for it. — Dying to Be
With Dad as a Daughter
Dear Dying to Be With Dad:
Your letter speaks to the impor-
tance of making use of all hospice
care and all other available care
covered by insurance. If you’ve
not expressed your frustration to
your mom, it’d be worth doing so.
I’m so sorry to hear what your
family is going through, and I
truly hope you get to spend some
quality time with your father.
By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc.
ARIES (March 21-April 19). You’ve a multifac-
eted skill set. When you don’t get to use some
of these skills for a long time, you start to feel
diminished. You forget all of who you are. To
be able to exercise your competence will be a
major lift to your spirit.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20). When beliefs
fuse into something more like stubbornness,
it’s time to re-examine. Inflexible thoughts lead
to intolerance and restriction. Go the opposite
way and you’ll invite freshness, creativity and
GEMINI (May 21-June 21). It’s true that things
can get pretty competitive in your professional
arena. Perhaps it seems counterintuitive, but
as you approach with compassion, caring and
affection, this will only enhance your profes-
sional potential.
CANCER (June 22-July 22). Living by your
values makes you a success. It can be done
at any income level, as it’s not a matter of high
finance but of high return on the potential of
your soul.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). The winner of the
game isn’t always one who wins the trophy;
often it’s the one who wins hearts. To be better
is to be kinder. In the long run, kindness and
love will be the score that matters.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). Your contribution
is exciting. And though you may not like every-
thing they have to say about you today, rest
assured there’s plenty of positive in it. Anyway,
it’s better to be talked about than not.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). The sunshine is
in you. Search for it, call on it, and draw it up.
This will be easier when you’re around people
who crave levity and laughter as much as you
do today.
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). The bridge from
one moment to the next is called courage.
Don’t worry about where you’ll find it, as it’s
activated by one foot stepping in front of the
other. March on.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). Caring
about the way your project looks and feels
doesn’t make you superficial, it makes you
human — a being to whom aesthetics typically
matter a great deal and has mattered for thou-
sands of years.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). How about
you: Do you doubt what can’t be seen, or do
you believe in the magic of invisible forces?
Fortunately, the forces don’t depend on your
belief to render aid, as evidenced by today’s
unexplainable phenomenon.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). Life is a swing,
back and forth, back and forth. The pendulum’s
nature is to flee; the pendulum’s nature is to
return. Pleasurable circumstances are tempo-
rary. So are uncomfortable ones. Hang on for
the change.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Some will pray
to St. Anthony, the patron saint of lost objects.
Others will meditate on the lost object in ques-
tion, while still others will trace their own steps.
Whatever your method, you’ve a lucky talent
for recovery today.
blessings will multiply; a fairy-godmother type
comes into your life in July. Before August is
over, you’ll figure out something that’s vexed
you for years. You’ll give a life-changing gift in
October. Your secret wish gets a plan in No-
vember and a team in January. Until then, keep
brainstorming. Scorpio and Virgo adore you.
Your lucky numbers are: 9, 44, 28, 11 and 29.