THE DAILY ASTORIAN • THURSDAY, MAY 18, 2017
FEATURES
Erasing the stain of alcohol
Dear Annie: My wife and how much they hurt her. I’ve
I have been together for 30 already felt horrible about it; I
years. The first 22 years of our don’t need her to remind me.
marriage, I was drunk every I wish she would stop holding
weekend and some week- it against me. I messed up, but
nights. I’m not proud of the I’m trying to make it right.
I guess I’m not really sure
things I did and said. I’m not
what my question
happy about all the
DEAR
is, but I’m just look-
quality time I missed
ing for help erasing
out on with our chil-
ANNIE
the stain alcohol has
dren, who are now
left on my marriage.
grown and out of the
Would appreciate your
house. But I can’t
thoughts. — Saved by
undo what’s been
Sobriety
done, and dwelling on
Dear Saved: Alco-
the shame only leads
holism is a family dis-
me to the dark place
Lane
ease. It impacts every
that makes me want to Annie
Creators
Syndicate
Inc.
member of the house-
drink. So I try to focus
hold. Although you
on the positive. I thank
the Lord for the second chance are recovering, your wife is
he’s given me. I look to the not. Please encourage her to
attend an Al-Anon meeting,
future.
The problem is that my where she can hear from others
wife seems not to have gotten who have learned how to stop
over the ways I wronged her “waiting for the other shoe to
in the past. Even though I hav- drop.” You might also both
en’t had a drink in eight years benefit from marriage counsel-
(thanks to Alcoholics Anon- ing, which would offer a neu-
ymous), I can tell she’s still tral space to air your feelings
always waiting for the other and move toward understand-
shoe to drop. She frequently ing. I commend you on your
nags me to go to AA meet- years of sobriety and wish you
ings. Sometimes she brings up many more.
Dear Annie: This is in
past events and tries to tell me
response to “Still Interested”
and anyone else who has the
problem of having a wife who
has lost interest in sex. As a
wife of 40 years, I had the
same problem after my hys-
terectomy and going through
menopause. I couldn’t tell
my husband that it was very
painful to have intercourse.
I avoided any type of affec-
tion for this reason. I was too
embarrassed to talk about
something so personal.
I finally got up the nerve to
tell my doctor. She said this is
very common and prescribed a
medicine to help. What a dif-
ference! I can’t believe I went
15 years before I said any-
thing. My husband is much
happier. Please, women who
are going through this: Talk to
your husband and doctor. — A
Happy Wife
Dear Happy: Thank you
for opening up about your
experience. It’s yet another
testament to the importance
of communication in having a
healthy sex life. If your letter
encourages even one woman
out there to talk to her doctor
or open up to her husband, it’s
worth its word count in gold.
5A
TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE
By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc.
ARIES (March 21-April 19). The current cosmic
bent will help you realize the wondrous power of
saying no, setting a boundary and enforcing a
limit. Such a gesture will make love stronger and
life simpler.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20). You’ll take back
your time from the digital bandits. You won’t
answer the phone just because it rings or act on
every electronic impulse demanding attention.
You’ll enjoy a few distractions — distractions of
your own choosing!
GEMINI (May 21-June 21). Either your prayers
will be answered, or that thing you do that’s a
little like praying will be linked to some interest-
ing results. Tonight, hone social skills, including
the art of making a powerful entrance and a
smooth exit.
CANCER (June 22-July 22). For today, “Why?”
is not the right question to ask. The question
“How?” on the other hand, could change your
life. It’s also a lucky day for running into the
exact people who know about the “how,” and you
should definitely take lots of notes.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). You refuse to think of
yourself as a victim of circumstance. There are
alternatives to explore — hard to see when
you’re invested in one way of being, but they
are there nonetheless. Decide to see them. You
always have choices.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). Sometimes all it
takes is a simple decision to feel different. It’s as
though you’re an actor and the director has just
walked up to you and told you to play the scene
confident, empowered and ready to make the
next winning move.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). The potential for trou-
ble lies in reacting to events in an emotional and
unthinking way. Take a breath and be thoughtful
FRANK AND ERNEST
BLONDIE
THATABABY
SALLY FORTH
PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN
B.C.
LOLA
DILBERT
SIX CHIX
BIZARRO
MUTTS
NON SEQUITUR
BABY BLUES
WIZARD OF ID
ZITS
ROSE IS ROSE
and deliberate in your response instead and
you’ll avoid the trouble altogether.
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Embrace the
paradise of imperfect circumstances. Right now,
exactly as you are, you’re good enough to do
what you really want to do, to the best of your
ability. Also, you’ll never be more ready. Go!
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). There are
people you you’re not happy around and yet
can’t avoid altogether. When you have to deal
with them, involve others. More people will dilute
the power of one negative influence.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). If you con-
tradict someone, or even yourself, the energy
of conflict will be ignited. This isn’t necessary!
Acknowledge the things you can’t agree on.
The validation may be all that’s necessary to
discharge the bad energy.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). You’ll be given
gifts today, although they may be disguised as
other things. Your definition of the term “gift” will
be thereby expanded. Whether something is a
gift or a bane is best determined over time.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). You know what
fun is to you. Stick with that today and the smiles
keep coming, whereas subscribing to other
people’s idea of fun might actually make you feel
irritated, uncomfortable or worse.
TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (May 19). You are
very much your own person this year, and you’ll
be shedding old myths and definitions. The
next10 weeks will do wonders for your satisfac-
tion at work and also for your social ties. July
presents a fun challenge and the ideal team-
mate. November brings romantic proclamations.
Save up through the colder months. Cancer and
Leo adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 9, 40, 2,
22 and 18.