6A
FEATURES
Parents worry about son
Dear Annie: We have three the house at least once a day. I am
children, ages 29, 27 and 23. The afraid he is ruining his life. He has
youngest is a senior at a Midwest- one more semester left and needs
ern university. We had our chil- to realize the importance of start-
dren rather late in life; I’m 66, and ing a career and dedicating a large
my wife is 60. We have been for- portion of his energy to it ver-
tunate and been able to provide a sus partying all the time. He has
no desire to change his
nice life for all of them.
activities. What can we
We have had issues
DEAR
do? — At Our Wits’ End
with the youngest for 10
ANNIE
Dear Wits: As coun-
years, mostly centered
terintuitive as it sounds,
on drugs. He waw sev-
the sooner you let go the
eral counselors, but he
sooner he’ll realize for
would snow all of them
himself that it’s time to
to the point that they
stop partying. The more
would feel sorry for him.
vocal you are in trying
It got so bad we sent him
Lane
to change your son the
to military school in his Annie
Creators
Syndicate Inc.
more he’ll stay the same.
junior year of high school
That said, when he’s at
(which all of us, includ-
your home, he should respect
ing him, agree saved his life).
Though he is much better than your rules. No bringing marijuana
he was, he still continues to use into the house.
Dear Annie: Your mailbox
pot daily. He and I vehemently
disagree over the harmfulness/ must be overflowing with rebut-
value of pot, its addictiveness, its tals from those of us familiar with
long-term effects and his reasons addiction. I have not had a drop
for using it. He says pot helps him of alcohol for over 40 years, grad-
unwind and handle stress. I’m not uated from the Rutgers Center of
sure he really knows what stress Alcohol Studies and worked in
the field of addiction.
is.
The letter from “Concerned
When he comes home on
school breaks, he knows better Parents” states that their son was
than to smoke in the house, but he addicted to pain meds after sur-
always finds an excuse to leave gery. It was probably drugs, not
alcohol, but he claims it is the rea-
son for his alcohol addiction.
The parents write that they are
letting the son’s addiction ruin
their social life because they do
not serve alcohol to guests in the
home to protect him from tempta-
tion. That is naïve and unrealistic.
After all, there are bars on every
block and alcohol in most homes.
The parents need education
and should attend Al-Anon meet-
ings to understand that recov-
ery from alcohol abuse requires
not changes in others’ lives but
changes in the addict’s life.
It is the son’s responsibility
to control his own priorities, life
choices and sobriety. Alcoholics
Anonymous can offer help for
him. — Someone Who Knows
Better
Dear Someone: Thank you
for your letter. My intention was
not to hold the parents totally
responsible for their son’s sobri-
ety but to encourage them to pro-
vide the best conditions for him.
However, I realized I missed the
mark. They shouldn’t revolve
their lives around his addiction. I
second your Al-Anon recommen-
dation, and I encourage any read-
ers in similar situations to learn
more at http://www.al-anon.org.
THE DAILY ASTORIAN • MONDAY, JANUARY 30, 2017
TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE
By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc.
ARIES (March 21-April 19). History is more
art than science. Like magnetic audiotape,
memories get a little more corrupted every time
they are recalled. As for today’s story, expect
that its emotional truth might be different from
its factual truth.
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). “Fake it till you
make it” is one approach. Then there’s the one
where you’re at peace with being out of your
element. A little lost, you’re confident you’ll work
it out and the others will want to help you do
that.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20). The gurus sug-
gest that the path to enlightenment involves the
elimination of opinion. That would be taking it to
extremes today, though you might temper your
opinions with a fair dose of open-mindedness.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). You don’t
need to get more things done. You need to get
important things done. What’s going to feed
the bottom line? What’s going to matter most at
the end of the day? What’s going to make you
smile?
GEMINI (May 21-June 21). You’re a hard
worker, and you’ll play even harder if you can
find the time to do it. If you can’t, then make the
time. Because it’s what you do during off hours
that will have the most impact.
CANCER (June 22-July 22). You’ll dig in
your heels today. You set your own groove and
you’ll move when you’re ready. Even when you
feel the hand of fate at your back, you won’t
budge. No one, not even destiny, can rush
you.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). People who are never
wrong are universally suspected, and no one
likes a know-it-all. It’s why you go the route of
curiosity and experimentation and possess a
cavalier attitude about correctness in general
today. It’s simply more fun that way.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). Like an actor
who is cast in an unlikely role, you have some
stretching to do. Is this an honor, a challenge
or a pain? Likely all three will fit in someway
before the show is over.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). Go on and argue
for your side. You’ll be respected for having an
opinion — and a spine. Keep it good-natured
and light and no one will be offended, even if
they disagree.
FRANK AND ERNEST
BLONDIE
THATABABY
SALLY FORTH
PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN
B.C.
LOLA
DILBERT
SIX CHIX
BIZARRO
MUTTS
NON SEQUITUR
BABY BLUES
WIZARD OF ID
ZITS
ROSE IS ROSE
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). Like the goat
that is your symbol, you’re willing to climb over
the obstacles in your path. If you have to do
that every time you pass, though, you’ll waste
a lot of energy. Remove the obstacles instead.
Clear the road.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). The compe-
tition for your attention today is rather fierce.
So many offers will be made to you — mostly
trivial and best passed up. But one offer will be
interesting, possibly even vital. Your instincts
will help you discern.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Don’t do it be-
cause it’s a “good opportunity.” You could fritter
away your energy trying to take advantage of
all the “good opportunities.” Unless this one
deeply inspires you, it’s not good enough.
TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (Jan. 31). Your
communication skills and style evolve to a new
high this year, and this touches all you do in
a favorable way. Clear and patient relating will
pull people close to you. You’ll stash extra mon-
ey in March until a worthy investment comes
along that will allow you to double it. June ex-
pands your family. Leo and Scorpio adore you.
Your lucky numbers are: 7, 30, 5, 28 and 44.