The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current, January 24, 2017, Page 5A, Image 5

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    THE DAILY ASTORIAN • TUESDAY, JANUARY 24, 2017
FEATURES
Surprise at a high price
Dear Annie: My husband and I our gifts and politely visited. When
were recently invited to a surprise all the son-in-law’s family abruptly
birthday party for his 30-year-old took seats at one end of the table,
daughter, “Marcy.” We received we left. The son-in-law’s comment
the “invitation” by text three days when we left was, “Are you sure
before the party via the son-in- you don’t want to stay?”
My husband and I would have
law’s mother, and it was scheduled
been glad to assist finan-
at an expensive restaurant.
DEAR
cially with this party or
Seemed a little off, as it was
suggest a less expensive
less than two weeks before
ANNIE
alternative so all our fam-
Christmas and many bud-
ily could have attended
gets are stretched now,
without feeling burdened
but the son-in-law and his
— if we would have been
family are well-to-do. We
asked. My husband loves
and other family members
his daughter, but it seems
RSVP’d that yes, we were
the son-in-law and his
coming.
Lane
family buy her away from
The day of the party, Annie
Creators
Syndicate Inc.
us whenever possible. And
we all received another
she loves it, but it really
text with specific instruc-
tions about what time Marcy’s hus- makes for some hard feelings,
band would be bringing her and not especially during the holidays. —
to answer any calls from her; it was Family Stressed
Dear Stressed: Sending out a
all a big happy surprise for her. The
text also mentioned that the cost of last-minute “Oh, by the way, hope
a meal at this restaurant would be you’re all prepared to spend $100
between $75 and $120 per couple. tonight” text? That’s the wrong
Am I a fuddy-duddy to think this kind of surprise party.
I’m guessing that money has
was inappropriate?
We let the text inviter know that never been much of an issue for
most of us would not be staying for these people, so they’re probably
dinner so she could change the res- clueless. Clue them in. Ask them to
ervation. One person was angry get you involved earlier in the pro-
and opted out completely. We went cess next time so you can help plan
for the “surprise” part, gave Marcy and contribute.
But once you have commu-
nicated to them your wishes and
been open about your expectations
for them, you must let go of the
hard feelings. As the saying goes,
“resentment is like drinking poison
and expecting the other person to
die.” Stay healthy.
Dear Annie: This is regard-
ing your answer to “Child For-
ever,” whose parents want her to
live closer to home. The day our
daughter was dropped off for her
freshman year of college, she and
I felt very much that this was a rite
of passage. We had both been pre-
paring for this last “untying,” if
you will (versus “cutting”). She
has soared independently quite
well. Yes, she’s learned her life
lessons, and yes, I’ve winced and
cried with her. However, this is
an adult relationship. I respect her
life and expect and receive recip-
rocation. She is a 10-hour drive
away. She has offered her home to
us and made clear that she wants
to be involved in our lives should
we need her — and not from a self-
ish view that we would make good
baby sitters, which you suggested
to “Child Forever” about her par-
ents. How incredibly sad that this
narrow view is propagated by you!
— Mary
5A
TOMORROW’S HOROSCOPE
By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc.
ARIES (March 21-April 19). Even when
the situation is far from ideal, your positive,
upbeat and honest attitude will make it
better. The “honest” part is key. Temper
optimism with realism.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20). If you take the
exact path you took yesterday, you’ll still
learn something new. You can’t help it: Your
curious mind will keep seeing more and
more as you relax into a routine.
GEMINI (May 21-June 21). Should you
play dumb to avoid hurting someone’s
feelings or avoid a confrontation? You’re too
smart to do this believably, but it still might
work to buy you some time in an awkward
situation.
CANCER (June 22-July 22). The saying
goes, “Enough is enough.” While that may
be true, getting to “enough” can be tricky.
Usually you don’t know the right amount
until you’ve gone over it. Well, next time you
can use what you know to scale it back.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). If there were some
way to be certain of beauty, truth or any
answer at all really, no one would still be
questing. If it has to be eternally sought,
there’s nothing to be found.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). It’s not true
that you live within the confines of your
head. Context matters. You’re different in
different situations. Your head changes with
the location and the environmental factors
and influences therein.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). Because you’re
paying such a marvelous quality of atten-
tion to all that’s going on around you, what
you’ll learn today will make you a more
discriminating and reflective person.
FRANK AND ERNEST
BLONDIE
THATABABY
SALLY FORTH
PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN
B.C.
LOLA
DILBERT
SIX CHIX
BIZARRO
MUTTS
NON SEQUITUR
BABY BLUES
WIZARD OF ID
ZITS
ROSE IS ROSE
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Too much
activity can be numbing. It’s like you can’t
tell if you’re in the swing of things or just
watching yourself go through the swinging
motions. Either way, it’s time to slow down
and rest.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). You’ll do
excellent work because of your ability to
prioritize, focus and dedicate yourself to the
task until it’s finished. Your work ethic now
compares to that of your heroes.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). Our feel-
ings show up with the purpose of helping
out, but they are often misguided. When
negative feelings impede your progress,
keep asking, “What am I telling myself that
is making this difficult?”
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). Just as the
bees and gophers have work to do, your
nature comes with a work-drive as well.
Loving yourself is loving your nature and
pushing yourself to fulfill the job at hand.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). A person
who doesn’t realize that he or she is wrong
will have no desire to do right. Pangs of
guilt or shame could be the first sign that
a person will soon be blossoming into
improvement.
TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (Jan. 25).
You’ll be part of a tight team this year. Fur-
thermore, you’re the reason it’s tight: You’re
the glue. Together you’ll earn a top honor
in March. April and September are the best
times to travel and accomplish a mission.
You’ll get closure on past pain in May and
almost immediately a new source of joy
opens. Scorpio and Gemini adore you. Your
lucky numbers are: 9, 5, 14, 27 and 37.