FEATURES THE DAILY ASTORIAN • FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 11, 2016 Sister misses younger sister Dear Annie: My youngest sis- ter, “Rebecca,” and I have not spo- ken in over 25 years. She was the golden child — never getting into trouble, always getting anything and everything she wanted. On the other hand, my elder sister and I were our parents’ worst nightmare. Fortunately, we were able to grow up before it was too late to repair our relationships with our parents. Our problem with the younger sister is that as she got older, she completely abandoned our parents. When my mother finally had to be put in a nursing home because of Alzheimer’s disease, Rebecca did nothing to help. I live 1,300 miles away, so it fell to my elder sister to deal with everything. My younger sister went to see my mother once in 10 years, even though she only lived 4 miles away. She never asked Dad to come over for din- ner, Christmas or any holiday. I have reached out over the years, especially because we are all getting up in age. I have given up completely, as has my elder sis- ter. Sometimes, siblings or not, it is just best to let go. Some peo- ple just do not want to be involved with their family. As much as we try, there are some things that can’t be forgiven — and shouldn’t Dear Annie By Annie Lane Creators Syndicate Inc. be. I have prayed over this for many years and have finally found peace. When my dad died, again, nothing. Why should we even be concerned with her at all? — Over and Out Dear Over: I’m so sorry for what you and your family went through with Alzheimer’s disease, and my condolences on the death of your father. Everyone deals with grief and stress in different ways, and it sounds as if Rebecca resorts to avoidance. It’s not the healthiest coping mechanism by any means. But just because she wasn’t there doesn’t mean she wasn’t hurting. Though you say you have found peace regarding your rela- tionship with your sister, your tone suggests otherwise. You’re right that “sometimes, siblings or not, it is just best to let go.” But you can’t very well let go if you’re holding on to all that anger. Find it in your heart to accept your sister for the flawed person that she is, whether or not she reaches out again. Dear Annie: To “Tea Drinker,” who wanted to know why cof- fee refills are free but tea refills sometimes aren’t: You’ve been led astray. It’s in the bag. Coffee is rel- atively inexpensive to brew pot after pot. Tea you purchase by the box, and it’s filled with individual bags. When a customer orders tea, yes, the presentation is more detailed, but frankly, it doesn’t take that much more time. But you are serving with a lemon, which has its cost, and honey, which also is an additional cost, and the tea bags. I have never worked anywhere where we charged for a second cup, but I do work in nicer restau- rants, where the selection of teas is already on the table —and you can be certain that bags of desirable tea flavors are stuffed in some peo- ple’s purses when they leave. But some places maybe can’t afford to be giving free tea bags away and serving the honey and lemon free. — Server of Tea 3C Tomorrow’s horoscope By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. ARIES (March 21-April 19). Your home should be a refuge, and yet you spend an awful lot of time tiptoeing around people and circumstances relating to the domestic lately. That’s not peaceful! Make a move to improve this before it spoils your well-being. TAURUS (April 20-May 20). Don’t hold on to secrets or shame out of fear of being judged. Half the time people are so into their own dramas that they could care less about yours. Tell, don’t tell -- that doesn’t matter. But in your own mind, let it go and be free. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). What’s in the stars for you now is a love as pure and all-consuming as a mother’s love for a child, only not from your mother and not for the childish part of you. This is a full-grown af- fection. CANCER (June 22-July 22). To join an- other person’s world requires you to leave your own for a little while. Do you find this scary or adventurous? Probably both today, though you might be calmed by your accom- paniment. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). When you’re in that bubbly, break-the-ice kind of mood you’re liable to say the things that bring peo- ple together, make them giggle and also possibly ruffle feathers. If that happens, it’s par for the course. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). Celebrities lend their endorsements to products for fi- nancial gain, but you have something much more integral at stake. You only make rec- ommendations for what you absolutely be- lieve in, a habit you’ll repeat today. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). Since you’re in such a hurry this week, here’s a time-sav- er: Learn as much as you can about where FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE you’re going before you take the first step. See your desired result in action. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Whatever you want to accomplish today, it will happen through networks. Bonus: You’ll see where you could add a few people -- people with different skills who are thrilled to be aligned with your specialness. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). Your friends might falter. Now it’s up to you to uphold the values of kindness and decency, which, paradoxically, you’ll do in the most humorous and irreverent manner. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). Your whole being leans toward one primary aim -- to raise the energy around you wherever you go. It’s a secret intention, perhaps an uncon- scious one, and a noble purpose for sure. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). How do you get better? The answer is really simple. Live. Live consciously. Pay attention. Atten- tion is love. If you seek improvement, you’ll tend to it, which is the same as loving it, which is eventually becoming it. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Do you know someone who already has what you want? This will be most helpful. You need to analyze the qualities and know all there is to know about them. TOMORROW’S BIRTHDAY (Nov. 12). The solar year brings a sense of coming into your age -- a new era of you! It’s something special. There’s an expression you’ve been wanting to project, and now you can’t help but do so. It’s a fresh role. It changes your whole game, from love to money to person- al beliefs -- a real transformation. Capricorn and Aries adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 4, 6, 3, 39 and 22.