FEATURES
THE DAILY ASTORIAN • FRIDAY, OCTOBER 28, 2016
Tomorrow’s horoscope
Brother’s problematic wife
Dear Annie: My brother,
“Peter,” recently got married
for the second time, to a woman
named “Valerie.” As his elder
brother, I was quite happy for
him that he had found someone to
spend his life with.
The problem is with Valerie.
She has never been particularly
nice to me or our extended fam-
ily. I really do not care whether she
likes me, as long as my brother is
happy, and I have ignored things
she has done that one would con-
sider insulting. I have always
addressed her appropriately and
have kept quiet when around her.
Recently, we were at a family
event. Everyone had a great time,
or so I thought. As we were all
leaving, Peter pulled me aside and
told me how I had insulted Valerie
because I did not speak with her
during the evening.
Well, I feel Valerie could have
talked to me, just as I could have
talked more to her. In reality, there
is very little to say to her because
she cannot hold a conversation. I
was not insulted that she did not
talk to me, as I don’t care.
But when Peter got home, he
wrote me an email listing how
I had insulted Valerie on every
occasion we’d been together since
Dear Annie
By
Annie
Lane
Creators
Syndicate
Inc.
he started dating Valerie. Need-
less to say, I was not happy with
the email.
Here is an example of how I
have insulted Valerie: When we
went out for Peter’s bachelor party
with about 20 friends, Peter forgot
to kiss Valerie goodbye. We were
already on our way, and I did not
turn around so he could say good-
bye to her.
Also, Valerie’s mother passed
away two months before the wed-
ding. I did not attend the funeral or
pay respects after the funeral. Val-
erie was deeply insulted by that. I
was sick and did not say anything
to her because my brother was say-
ing how she was constantly crying.
I did not say anything because I did
not want her to start crying in front
of me and the family (in a public
place). Interesting to note, when
my father-in-law died six months
prior, I never received any condo-
lences from her, nor did she attend
the funeral. Both my wife and I did
not care and never thought any-
thing of her behavior.
Needless to say, Valerie has
caused a lot of trouble. My wife
and I no longer want to be around
this woman. This has destroyed my
relationship with my brother. Any
suggestions on how to fix this? It
is obvious that no matter what I
do, this woman will be insulted. —
Family Dynamics
Dear Family: I’ll grant you
this: Valerie sounds demanding,
dramatic and more than a little
self-involved. That said, I think
you could have been more empa-
thetic to her after her mother died.
There’s nothing wrong with a per-
son’s persistently crying after los-
ing a loved one. Your fear of tears
shouldn’t have stopped you from
being there for a woman who
was practically — and now is —
family. Perhaps if you reach out
to Valerie, apologize and tell her
you’re sorry for her loss, things
will smooth over enough for you
and your wife to continue having
a cordial relationship with them. If
for no other reason, try it for your
brother’s sake.
3C
By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc.
ARIES (March 21-April 19). You can’t
change people (if you could, perhaps your
home would be a lot cleaner without your
efforts), but you can certainly inspire them,
deter them and choose how long to be
around them.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20). You put your-
self out there, and now you cringe to think of
how. It only means that you have guts. Truly,
the best out there have had similar expe-
riences. You’re on your way to becoming a
master.
GEMINI (May 21-June 21). Someone
who is listening to you and tracking with
you on matters of minutiae as well as the
things that matter most to you: This is not
only flattering and validating; it’s practically
intoxicating.
CANCER (June 22-July 22). You care,
but you don’t always call. Maybe you’re
afraid of getting hooked into the situation
and not being able to get out of it. This is a
legitimate fear. Decide before the interaction
how far you’re willing to go with it.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). While managing
the practicalities of life we sometimes mini-
mize the importance of being able to make
others feel good. After all, what does the
bottom line have to do with other people’s
feelings? Answer: everything.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). Wanting is
fun. It’s fun all weekend! It’s fun even after
you realize that getting what you want won’t
bring happiness. Oh, well! The chase — now
that’s something you’re going to remember.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). You’re not
getting the help you once were getting —
good! You’ve grown to the place where you
can handle a lot more on your own, and
FRANK AND ERNEST
BLONDIE
THATABABY
SALLY FORTH
PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN
B.C.
LOLA
DILBERT
SIX CHIX
BIZARRO
MUTTS
NON SEQUITUR
BABY BLUES
WIZARD OF ID
ZITS
ROSE IS ROSE
because of this you don’t have to report to
anyone. Relish the freedom!
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). It’s amazing
how people change the rules to accom-
modate their fascinations and preferences.
Lucky for you, you’ve the preference and the
fascination that will lead to favorable chang-
es.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). When
you’re not sure of your social standing, the
thing to do is to host a party. Not only will you
discover the social lay of the land but also it
will be your pleasure to put this all together.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). A criti-
cal mind can be a great gift. Your ability to
discern the necessary bits from the unnec-
essary bits will make you more productive,
popular and effective all-around.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). One way
is to reach, wander and quest until you find
what you’re looking for. It’s not the only way,
and this weekend it’s not the best way, ei-
ther. If you stay in one place, the world is
sure to come to you.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Before you
do the heavy lifting, physically, emotionally
or otherwise, pause to ask yourself if there’s
another way to float this. Look for elevators.
Good sense may prevent a strain.
SATURDAY’S BIRTHDAY (Oct. 29). Sort
out the finances, and the next 10 weeks will
bring you new resources you can use all
year. With the healing of a relationship, you
will no longer feel you have to go to great
lengths to earn someone’s love. A new cre-
ative channel will open in you this year, too.
Love is among the friends you meet pursu-
ing it. Cancer and Taurus adore you. Your
lucky numbers are: 9, 4, 20, 45 and 13.