FEATURES
6A
Please don’t ghost the host
Dear Annie: I’m wondering
whether you could settle a dispute
between my friend “Laura” and me.
She thinks it’s rude to “ghost” —
leave parties without saying bye. I
think it’s fine.
Last weekend, our friend had
a barbecue. This particular friend
is a social butterfly, so there were
probably close to 75 people there. I
knew a dozen or so of the guests. I
enjoyed catching up with them and
meeting some new people, but after
a couple of hours, my socializing
meter was about up and I was ready
to go home and get to bed.
I didn’t want to take the trou-
ble to say bye to everyone, so I
just said good night to the people
in my immediate vicinity and then
stepped out quietly. About an hour
later, Laura texted asking where I’d
gone. When I told her I was already
at home, she got angry and said it
was rude for me not to say goodbye.
I really have never thought of it
as rude. I think of it as a timesaver
for everyone. I hate awkwardly
interrupting the flow of conver-
sations to tell people I’m leaving,
especially because then other peo-
ple usually chime in, “Oh, I should
get going, too,” and I feel as if I’ve
killed the party. I just want to slip
out quietly.
Dear Annie
By
Annie
Lane
Creators
Syndicate
Inc.
What do you think, Annie? Is it
bad manners to ghost? — Tiptoeing
Toward the Exit
Dear Tiptoeing: People might
better like your vanishing act if
it came with a bang and a cloud
of smoke. Almost all the people
I talked to about this say it drives
them crazy. They’ll be out with
friends and suddenly have a “Home
Alone”-like moment in which they
realize they’re one short.
Though I don’t condone the
behavior, I get it; you don’t want
to interrupt conversations or derail
the party train. Plus, there’s a frozen
pizza at home calling your name.
(Admit it.)
I think a good rule of thumb
is: Don’t ghost the host. You don’t
have to make the rounds to say bye
to everyone you know, but at the
very least, seek out the host to say
thanks for having you. Then you
may spirit yourself away and into
your pajamas.
Dear Annie: My stepson was
married in a small backyard cer-
emony. His father and I were not
invited and were not even aware of
the wedding until after it was over.
Now, a year and a half later, we are
invited to a “wedding reception.”
He lives in another state, and it is
very difficult to travel (for health
and money reasons). I don’t want to
go, but my husband insists we go.
I won’t know many people, but all
his ex-wife’s family will be there,
and they are not very nice.
What can I do? The parties will
be in a place I cannot stand to be.
Should I grit my teeth and suffer
through the long car ride and the
rest? If he goes without me, his ex
will be all over him. (It’s happened
before, right in front of me.) What
to do? — Wary and Weary Traveler
Dear Wary: You may want to
pick up a mouthguard, because yes,
I think you have to grit your teeth.
When you marry someone, you
also marry his family. If it’s pos-
sible to overcome the health and
financial issues (and it sounds as if
it is), then go. It’s just one weekend.
Your husband should appreciate the
effort on your part for a long time.
THE DAILY ASTORIAN • WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 31, 2016
Tomorrow’s horoscope
By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc.
ARIES (March 21-April 19). Don’t be sur-
prised if your personality naturally starts to
curve to the job at hand. This flexibility of form
is a strength, not a weakness. It is because
you are so solid at your core that you’re able
to bend to your environment.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20). Every change
is a key to the door of another opportunity. It
is not always clear which door the key goes
to, though. You’ll spend part of the day trying
different “doors,” seeking the right fit.
GEMINI (May 21-June 21). Oddly, the dif-
ficulties attract you. Or maybe this isn’t so
strange. Maybe it’s the mark of fine character
to seek constant challenge. The rewards are,
after all, richer where powerful efforts are the
demand.
CANCER (June 22-July 22). You’ll ride a
highly creative frame of mind all day, similar to
the one you often experience just as you are
drifting off to sleep. There is gold to be mined
in this beautiful mix of conscious and subcon-
scious awareness.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). The one you’re
wild for is always somewhere on your mind,
no matter what you’re doing. Therefore, being
thoughtful comes easily to you. You’re magne-
tized toward anything that might delight your
love.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). As for your
all-consuming, deep, affectionate attachment,
sometimes you can’t remember how it began.
Other times you can’t have a thought that’s not
remembering.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). The fresh luck
will come after what’s old has been wrapped
up. Consider bringing in some outside forces
to finish the job faster. The results will be well
worth the money.
FRANK AND ERNEST
BLONDIE
THATABABY
SALLY FORTH
PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN
B.C.
LOLA
DILBERT
SIX CHIX
BIZARRO
MUTTS
NON SEQUITUR
BABY BLUES
WIZARD OF ID
ZITS
ROSE IS ROSE
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Get the word
out about what you do. Post wide and far. You’ll
be surprised who can make use of your tal-
ent, and in ways you will really enjoy. That you
make money too will be the cherry on top.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). Troubled
people sense your empathetic nature, and
they will tell you their problems. Don’t let this
stress you out. Your mind will race to how you
can help, but you needn’t worry: Your listening
ears are help enough.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). You have
an excellent sense for placing people in the
position they are best suited to. Now the trick
is in knowing how to state things to make the
job appealing to the person who should be
doing it.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). There’s so
much that needs to be wrapped up today that
you’ll wish you had your own staff to help you
finish. Unless you do have your own staff, and
then you’ll wish said staff were slightly more
efficient.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). To the un-
trained eye, your carefree ways belie your
strong character. The reality is that it’s precise-
ly because of your inner strength and faith in
yourself and life’s process that you can afford
to be easygoing.
THURSDAY’S BIRTHDAY (Sept. 1). Your
cosmic birthday gift is a heightened sense for
what people need and how to deliver it. Put to
good use, this sense will make you rich in love
and dollars. You’ll give new life to the group in
September. Your exceptional handling of VIPs
will earn you a role in a very important mission
at the start of 2017. Cancer and Aries adore
you. Your lucky numbers are: 9, 5, 12, 40 and
19.