FEATURES
6A
Time to tolerate the music
Dear Annie: I can’t stand R.E.M.
(the band, not the sleep cycle). I just
never understood their appeal. I was
born in the early ‘80s and went to col-
lege in the late ‘90s and early 2000s,
so a lot of people around me loved the
band. One insufferably “alternative”
guy I went to school with had a giant
R.E.M. tattoo on his back.
This hasn’t really been an issue
for me as an adult. The lead singer,
Michael Stipe, stays out of the public
eye, and when my satellite radio sta-
tion puts on “It’s the End of the World
as We Know It” for the billionth time,
I simply change the station to one
that’s playing a song by Taylor Swift,
Drake or Adele. But this does become
a problem sometimes — whenever
I’m with my wife.
It’s not what you think. She’s not
like some big R.E.M. superfan. I’m
not sure I could have made that work.
The thing is that her brother, who is
my age, had a rough time in high
school. He was depressed, even to
the point of being suicidal, and claims
that R.E.M. saved his life.
I know depression is real, and I am
glad my brother-in-law is doing well
(he’s married with two kids), but I
can’t help myself. I still think R.E.M.
is unlistenable. When they come on
the radio, my wife turns it up and talks
about how special the band is. Why
Dear Annie
By
Annie
Lane
Creators
Syndicate
Inc.
does this bother me so much? — Los-
ing My Religion
Dear Losing: What about ind-
ing some compassion? We all have
our pet peeves. I’m not the biggest
R.E.M. fan, either. But I want you
to try — sincerely try — to put your
grievances with the band aside for 5
1/2 minutes and listen to their song
“Everybody Hurts.” Imagine how
someone who feels utterly alone
might be comforted by its message.
Yes, it’s hard to remember to be
tolerant when annoying things lare
up, but empathy works like a mus-
cle; the more you exercise it the more
it grows. You’ll be stronger for the
effort.
Dear Annie: It was my 25th birth-
day recently, and my iance and I had
a speciic themed party on that day,
but it was all of his friends who came
over. I am on the shy side and didn’t
THE DAILY ASTORIAN • THURSDAY, JULY 28, 2016
Tomorrow’s horoscope
By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc.
wish to make my birthday a big deal,
so I thought it’d be fun to have this
party for the guys. After they all found
out it was my birthday and show-
ered me with positive vibes, one of
the guys asked me why I wasn’t out
with my friends. He didn’t mean any-
thing harmful by it, and I didn’t think
too hard about the question in the
moment. But later on, it had me think-
ing of the answer: “Because I have no
friends.” After graduating college, my
closest friends all dispersed into the
world, and I found myself no longer
surrounded by them.
I do live with my best friend —
my iance. However, I feel a bit sad
with the realization that I have no
other friends. I love spending time
with my guy, but I don’t have a close-
knit group like him anymore. His
friends are great, but I want some,
too. Am I silly for wanting this? —
Locally Lonely
Dear Locally: You’re not silly for
wanting friends, but you are silly if
you think they’re going to magically
appear at your doorstep.
Surely, some of your iance’s
friends have girlfriends. Try reaching
out to them. Say yes to more things.
Become an active part of your com-
munity. Check out websites designed
to connect people around speciic
interests, such as Meetup.
ARIES (March 21-April 19). More than
one high-priority concern will demand your
attention, and you can get to each one be-
fore the day is over. Make a list and persist
until all items are checked off: It’s important.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20). Wanting the
same thing as your equally matched oppo-
sition? This can’t end well, even if you win.
Like two atoms seek to occupy the same
space, the result is cataclysmic. Do consider
wanting something else.
GEMINI (May 21-June 21). Backing out
may not seem like the heroic thing to do, but
if it’s the thing that will make your life better,
smoother and more peaceful, do it. Remove
yourself from the situation; seek sanctuary.
CANCER (June 22-July 22). It may seem,
from your current vantage, that any place is
better than the one in which you stand. It’s
not true, but you should move anyway, if
only to get into a new position.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). There’s no chance
of the day getting boring. Part of the fun will
include snappy banter with an attractive
someone. By the way, if you keep this up
you could accidentally make someone fall in
love with you.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). From time
to time, even the most exciting people get
bored of their own stories and skins. Being
around the people who love you dearly will
help you see yourself with the adoring eyes
that they see you through.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). The dangers of
being overwhelmed are just as real as they
are unnecessary. You can and will handle
everything you need to. Start easy and make
a list of the harder things. You’ll deal with
those when you’re in a stronger position.
FRANK AND ERNEST
BLONDIE
THATABABY
SALLY FORTH
PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN
B.C.
LOLA
DILBERT
SIX CHIX
BIZARRO
MUTTS
NON SEQUITUR
BABY BLUES
WIZARD OF ID
ZITS
ROSE IS ROSE
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Owning too
much makes you feel cumbersome and dis-
organized. You can upgrade by downsizing.
Tonight, if you’re in the mood to experience
the mysteriously exciting side of love, it will
be there for you.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). Some-
times life happens (SET ITAL) to (END ITAL)
you, but mostly it happens (SET ITAL) from
(END ITAL) you. Even though you’re not al-
ways in charge, it’s empowering to see your
life as a series of choices.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). Turn off
your self-censorship for a few hours while
you brainstorm about how to improve your
personal life. During this time, there are no
wrong answers or threatening ideas. Ideas
won’t hurt you.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). Morale is
higher when everyone on the team feels at
least somewhat powerful. If it seems some-
one has too much control while others have
none, there will be problems. Seek balance.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Your thought-
fulness, combined with your generous spirit
and refusal to deal in pettiness, inspires love
to flow through your life in a big way. Some-
one is getting used to this and will soon be
spoiled if you keep it up.
FRIDAY’S BIRTHDAY (July 29). A new in-
come source opens to you in the next seven
weeks. August features promises kept; new
commitments will be made in September.
October is one long celebration of friend-
ship. Because you mostly care about doing
work you can be proud of, your satisfaction
is guaranteed in the last months of the year.
Libra and Sagittarius adore you. Your lucky
numbers are: 12, 3, 33, 28 and 15.