FEATURES
6A
Tomorrow’s horoscope
Depressed sis is hard to visit
Dear Annie: My sister-in-law is
going through dialysis. She is able
to do it in the comfort of her home
with help of a nurse, so she can be
close to her young kids. Her hus-
band dotes on her. She isn’t able to
get out much, but she tries to see my
in-laws for supper or coffee when-
ever possible. My husband and I
make an effort to come over to say
hi and be supportive, plus our kids
love seeing their cousins.
The problem is, whenever I ask
her how she is doing, she says some-
thing dark like, “I’m still alive, but
why would any of you care?” Last
week, she said she is going to get a
motorcycle because she’s going to
die anyway. If you try to steer the
conversation to something lighter,
she drives it right back to her illness.
I offered to help with her cleaning,
and to read her a book while she is
getting treatment and give her a foot
massage. She told my mother-in-law
that I was “showing off” and stopped
speaking to me. My husband calls
her an emotional vampire.
Annie, I have suffered from
depression for years. I go to reg-
ular meetings with a peer group,
take a good medication and have
the full support of my husband.
When I am around my sister-in-law,
my own dark feelings go to a place
Annie’s
Mailbox
Creators
Syndicate Inc.
Kathy Mitch-
ell and
Marcy Sugar
that I don’t like, and I once came
home from seeing her and contem-
plated suicide. I also don’t want my
12-year-old, who already shows
signs of depression, to be near my
sister-in-law.
My mother-in-law won’t let me
say anything to her about it. How do
I handle this situation without break-
ing my mother-in-law’s heart? —
Going Crazy
Dear Going Crazy: Your sis-
ter-in-law is terribly depressed, as
you know, and feels so sorry for her-
self that she cannot see beyond her
own unhappiness. But you should
not compromise your health in order
to be supportive of someone else.
Make your visits brief, and let your
husband go without you when it
gets too dif¿cult. 'on’t try to cheer
her up. She only wants to vent. And
when she rebuffs your offers of
help, ignore it. She is not capable of
appreciating the kindness of others.
We also suggest you check out the
National Kidney Foundation (kid-
ney.org) for additional suggestions
and insight.
Dear Annie: We have been mar-
ried 58 years, are in our mid-80s
and happy, reasonably healthy and
¿nancially secure. 2n birthdays and
Christmas, we always give mone-
tary gifts to the children, grandchil-
dren and great-grandchildren.
Two of the grandchildren never
acknowledge this with a “thank
you” or even a phone call. I say, “It’s
time to close the bank.” My husband
says, “It doesn’t matter, because we
have the money, and they can use
it.”
To send or not to send — that is
the question. We have decided to
abide by your advice. — The Bank
of Grandpa and Grandma
Dear Bank: You are certainly
Musti¿ed in stopping, but we say,
give them the chance to learn: Tell
the two reprobates directly that
that there will be no more gifts
unless they let you know, via note,
email, text or phone call, that they
were received. 2therwise, you will
assume they do not appreciate your
generosity and you will stop. You’ll
feel better knowing that the ¿nal
decision was theirs.
THE DAILY ASTORIAN • FRIDAY, APRIL 1, 2016
By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc.
ARIES (March 21-April 19). Sometimes
you’re tempted to slack on the whole “personal
excellence” thing, but remember, this isn’t just
about you. You’ve had a profound impact on
another person whether or not you realize it or
get credit for it.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20). Something has
shaken your confidence, but this is not who
you really are. Get back to that hardiness that’s
so you. Do the things that prove you’re strong,
in control and capable of whatever life throws
at you.
GEMINI (May 21-June 21). You thought you
were stuck in a situation, but now you realize
that you’ve been stumbling around perfectly
good exit doors and windows the whole time.
Today you just might turn the knob.
CANCER (June 22-July 22). Once in a
while you may get lucky, but for the most part
the same rules apply to you and everyone else
in the carnival of life: You can’t take the ride if
you didn’t buy the ticket.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). You’ve been too
self-sacrificing. Make your own wishes a pri-
ority, if only for the experiment of it. You could
learn that loved ones are less supportive than
you’d hoped. But it could also be the thing that
makes your weekend great.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). The job at hand
is not beneath you, though you may want to
give it another title just to reinforce the point.
What you call things is very important, be-
cause it changes your attitude about what they
are.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). More options ar-
en’t necessarily better. An overwhelming envi-
ronment may make you feel closed and small.
If that’s the case, scratch it off and keep moving
until you find the environment that inspires you.
FRANK AND ERNEST
BLONDIE
THATABABY
SALLY FORTH
PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN
B.C.
LOLA
DILBERT
SIX CHIX
BIZARRO
MUTTS
NON SEQUITUR
BABY BLUES
WIZARD OF ID
ZITS
ROSE IS ROSE
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Fun starts with
your preferences. Life doesn’t have to fit your
wish list in order to be a blast, but one or two
standout features that light up your heart will go
a long way toward making you smile.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). Attention
spans aren’t what they used to be. Communi-
cating in quantity isn’t the answer and will, in
fact, probably make things worse. Commu-
nicate with fewer, more specific and effective
words.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). Compari-
son takes all the fun out of the game. But may-
be it’s not a game. Maybe it’s a war and you’re
dead serious about using the right attack.
In that case, compare and contrast to your
heart’s content.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). Your praise
goes straight to the hearts and minds of the
praised. The qualities you admire in a person
will blossom. If you’re a leader, you’ll get as-
tounding results by focusing on what your fol-
lowers are doing right.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Maybe what
you’re doing is just a hobby at this point, but it’s
going to lead to something different. You’ll have
responsibilities and possibly a paycheck that
goes along with it. Pace yourself. Enjoy these
carefree times.
SATURDAY’S BIRTHDAY (April 2). The
tenderness you give others will be lavished on
you in a more enthusiastic form as loved ones
celebrate your many accomplishments this
year. You know what it’s like to be an outsider
looking in, and that’s why you’ll take someone
under your wing in May — the start of some-
thing life-changing. Expect money from a big
sale in July. Cancer and Libra adore you. Your
lucky numbers are: 4, 8, 22, 12 and 30.