FEATURES
6A
Tomorrow’s horoscope
Wife withholding intimacy
Dear Annie: I’m 48 and have
been married to my beautiful wife
for 21 years. Lately, whenever we
argue, she will withhold sex. This
could be anywhere from a week to
three months. And she won’t talk
about it.
This is putting a huge strain on
our relationship. We’ve been to
counseling for a year, but it hasn’t
helped. She tells me that men my
age don’t really need sex and that
P\OLELGRLVWRRKLJK(YHU\¿JKW
we have brings back arguments
from 10 or 15 years ago. It’s like
she cannot forgive and move on.
Women wonder why men stray.
I don’t want to leave her, but I’ve
had enough. How can I explain
this to her? Every time I bring it
up, she shuts me down. — Cut Off
in Montreal
Dear Montreal: Your wife is
wrong about your libido, although
it’s possible that she has libido
problems of her own. But that is
only part of what’s happening. No
matter what you may have done
10 or 15 years ago, bringing up
old arguments and shutting down
any discussion of current issues
damages your marriage. Counsel-
ing cannot possibly work if your
wife refuses to participate honest-
ly. You can ask for a trial separa-
Annie’s
Mailbox
Creators
Syndicate Inc.
Kathy Mitchell
and
Marcy Sugar
tion to see if that wakes her up.
In the meantime, ask to see your
counselor on your own.
Dear Annie: I wrote to you a
couple of years ago, signing my
letter, “Unhappy Parents.” I said
that my husband and I felt my
stepson was making a big mistake
by marrying much too young and
we said so. Instead, my stepson
repeated these hurtful words to
KLV¿DQFHDQGIURPWKDWSRLQWIRU-
ward, they would not speak to us.
We were not allowed to attend the
wedding.
My husband was an amazing
father, and we were all very close
until this woman wedged herself
in and started saying bad things
about us. Apparently, she is ex-
tremely close to my husband’s
ex-wife and that woman hates my
husband.
You told us to try writing them
a letter and apologizing, even
though there was no guarantee it
would succeed. We immediately
did this, but it didn’t help much.
They have since had my husband’s
¿UVW JUDQGFKLOG :H VHQW EDE\
gifts, but have not been asked to
see the baby. They instead sent
us a book of pictures of the baby,
including several with the ex-wife
holding the child. It’s a beautiful
book, with quotes about the im-
portance of family, yet there is not
one photo of my husband in it.
I am so hurt. They have now
alienated my husband’s daugh-
ter, which in hindsight was likely
a relationship only held togeth-
HU IRU ¿QDQFLDO UHDVRQV $QQLH ,
helped care for these kids for 22
years. Should I give up? Is there
anything else I can try? — Still
Unhappy
Dear Still: If the ex-wife is
poisoning the relationship and
the daughter-in-law still holds a
grudge, there isn’t much you can
do. However, they did send photos
of the baby, which is more than
you might have received before.
Your husband should let his chil-
dren know that he will always love
them, but otherwise, we urge you
to focus your energies elsewhere.
We’re so sorry.
THE DAILY ASTORIAN • MONDAY, JANUARY 11, 2016
By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc.
ARIES (March 21-April 19). Resist the
urge to impress strangers. Who knows if
you’ll ever see those people again? You’ll
never regret spending the best of your en-
ergy making a stellar impression on those
closest to you.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20). Nature is effi-
cient. You were made with the sensors to tell
you exactly what not to do. Pain equals “stop
right now.” Trust the equation and be very
skeptical of anyone who tries to convince
you otherwise.
GEMINI (May 21-June 21). You’ll be mak-
ing a presentation. While it will be important
to come off as relevant to the times, your
humanity is what will shine through. Warmth
and softness will trump the clean, shiny cold
of the cutting edge.
CANCER (June 22-July 22). Because
your senses are ready to take it all in, the
day will be peppered with big feelings, in-
consequential inventions, nuanced moods,
surprises and excitements. What more
could you want?
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). When you look
objectively at your life, how much of it can
you trace back to a dream of the way you
wanted it to be? It’s something to think about
as you construct today’s brand new dreams.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). Those around
you should know better by now than to
question your seemingly idiosyncratic ways.
There is always a method to your madness,
and if you had to stop and explain at every
juncture, you wouldn’t get half as much
done.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). You have the
sneaking suspicion that you can do better,
and you’ll devote your energy to improving.
FRANK AND ERNEST
BLONDIE
THATABABY
SALLY FORTH
PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN
B.C.
LOLA
DILBERT
SIX CHIX
BIZARRO
MUTTS
NON SEQUITUR
BABY BLUES
WIZARD OF ID
ZITS
ROSE IS ROSE
You would rather be around the people who
compel your strength than the people who
agree to your status quo.
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Considering
how your imagination is running today, it will
be important that you make an extra effort
to see people the way they are and not the
way you wish (or long) for them to be.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). You
have a decision to make. Take a risk and
you’ll set a plot in motion. If you don’t take
the risk, the plot will continue in the pattern
that has already been established.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). Some-
thing that has become very personal to you
will become meaningful to others, too, if you
share in the right way. Your plight is more
universal than you know.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). They’ll
want to know your experience, but some-
how it can’t be told in a few words. You don’t
want the feeling to be reduced by over-sim-
plification. Maybe this is best kept in your
heart.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). So, you
weren’t expecting much? That was smart.
You set yourself up for a pleasant surprise.
You’re going to appreciate what the others
bring to the table today.
TUESDAY’S BIRTHDAY (Jan. 12). Peo-
ple tend to associate warm, fuzzy, wonderful
feelings with falling in love, but the actual ex-
perience is often far less cozy. The nature of
“falling” is anticipation and fear. You make all
of this work for you this year as you tumble
for people, places and situations. Truly, this
year will be an adventure. Taurus and Scor-
pio adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 4, 19
33, 38 and 5.