The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current, June 08, 2015, Image 5

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Scared of being hurt again
Dear Annie: I’ve been good
friends with “Barney” for 10
years. During that time, we’ve
had an on-and-off romantic rela-
tionship. For years, I assumed it
was a timing issue, but I final-
ly realized that, as much as he
might care about me, I was just
being used to fill up time between
women. I felt so betrayed that we
didn’t speak for a year.
A few months ago, Barney
called, wanting to get togeth-
er and talk. He told me he had
done a lot of soul searching and
came to the realization that he
had messed up a great thing with
me. He wanted to prove he had
My mother recently became ill
and lapsed into a coma. Barney
has been at my side, helping and
supporting my sister and me. He
brought flowers to Mom’s room,
bought us coffee and sandwiches,
and has done anything else we
needed. He has volunteered many
times to sit with my mother so we
could go home, shower and put in
some time at our jobs.
Barney truly has stepped up,
but I am still scared it won’t last.
I fear this will end up being yet
another game he’s playing. As
much as I love him and every-
Syndicate Inc.
Kathy Mitchell
Marcy Sugar
thing he is doing for my family, I
don’t know that I can risk putting
my heart out there again. Should
I give him another chance? Or
should I tell him we are better off
just being friends? — Hopelessly
in Love
Dear Hopelessly: It’s under-
standable that you would be skit-
tish, but loving someone always
involves the risk of being hurt.
What you need is time to deter-
mine whether Barney is in it for
the long haul. He seems to be
trying to prove himself, and this
should not be dismissed out of
hand. We think he deserves a sec-
ond chance. Tell Barney you want
to take it slowly this time to be
certain you can trust the relation-
ship. If he is the real deal, he will
understand and willingly give
you as much time as you need.
Dear Annie: At our Mother’s
Day mass last month, a fellow
usher told me it is inappropriate
to wish a man a happy Mother’s
Day. But when he would say to a
woman, “Happy Mother’s Day,”
she would often respond, “Same
to you!”
Is it really inappropriate to
wish a male a happy Mother’s
Day? Likewise, is it inappropri-
ate to wish a female a happy Fa-
ther’s Day? — Lafayette, Ind.
Dear Lafayette: We think peo-
ple are too eager to be offended.
A lot of parents are raising chil-
dren without the help of a spouse.
They are both mother and father
to these kids and undoubtedly
appreciate the acknowledgment
on those special days. They also
have mothers and fathers, and
wishing a man a happy Mother’s
Day could easily indicate good
wishes to his mother (or wife or
other female relative). And vice
versa when it comes to Father’s
People can take these greet-
ings any way they choose, but
we think they should make every
effort to take them in the spirit
in which they are intended — as
good wishes. There is no reason
to fuss over the etiquette, which
says only to reply, “Thank you.”
Tomorrow’s horoscope
By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc.
ARIES (March 21-April 19). People
fail all the time without becoming failures.
Separate the person from the deed. The
same goes for success. Don’t confuse the
success of a project with the success of a
TAURUS (April 20-May 20). Many peo-
ple resist change — change couldn’t care
less. It unfolds, marches on, carries out
— it happens. Those putting up resistance
often don’t make a lick of difference.
GEMINI (May 21-June 21). The one who
continually puts his needs before yours will
not magically stop doing this because it
bothers you. The behavior will continue un-
til a boundary is set.
CANCER (June 22-July 22). When you
find that you’re taking it all a little too se-
riously, just stop and start again. You can
begin anew at any time of any day. Today
brings an unlimited number of “do-overs.”
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). You’re all too
aware of what everyone around you wants,
and you’ll find it very difficult not to try to
satisfy those wants. Address your own
needs instead. That’s when the miracles
will start happening.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). The spoils
never go to the mediocre performers.
That’s why you want to be outstanding. It’s
what drives you to achieve at a higher level
than is commonly expected.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). You try not
to have expectations of others that they’re
not likely to meet. Extend that kindness to
yourself. Unreasonable expectations are
unkind. If you can do just a little bit better
than the last time, that’s enough for now.
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). You are
self-sufficient to a degree, but you still
need people, and your life will be better for
reaching out and asking for help. This after-
noon brings an earth sign with something
meaningful to contribute to you.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21).
Someone in your midst has a way of dom-
inating the energy of the room. Give your
attention sparingly to reset the balance.
Other people’s problems do not automati-
cally have to become yours.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). There’s
no reason to let a conflict drag on, as it
should be easy to resolve now. Chance is
on your side. The best solution could very
well be a flip of the coin.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). You put
people’s feelings first. This way of prioritiz-
ing suddenly makes things simple. Tonight,
speak with precision because you’ll be
taken at your word and interpreted quite
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). A Japa-
nese proverb says that the silent man is
the best to listen to. This is why so many
ears turn toward you today. You’re not in
the mood to chat or volunteer opinions, but
wisdom radiates from you anyway.
will fulfill an important role in your commu-
nity and be honored for it. Just don’t lose
sight of fun — it’s a noble purpose that,
in the end, will contribute to your legacy.
Someone wants to invest in you in July.
Loved ones credit you for their accomplish-
ments in 2016. You’ll take a whimsical idea
to the mainstream. Scorpio and Leo peo-
ple adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 5,
2, 13, 39 and 44.