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NW
word
COLUMBIA BAR
nerd
The Chunnel
By RYAN HUME
By RYAN HUME
Knappa
>Q Sԥ@
noun
1. A small, unincorporat-
ed community in Clatsop
County situated 15 miles
east of Astoria out U.S.
Highway 30 on the south-
ern bank of the Columbia
River
Origin:
Indian word for the village
on this land was Tle-las-qua.
Present day Knappa takes its
name from pioneer settler
Aaron Knapp, Jr., who lived in
the area for many years and
served as the first postmaster
of the Knappa office begin-
ning in 1872. The post office
was closed in 1943.
“I am visiting Knappa and send some
facts relative to the place, which may
not be uninteresting to your readers.
Knappa lies about eighteen miles from
Astoria on the Oregon side of the river,
on the slough. It has a very fine landing
and covered wharf, owned by A. Knapp.
There some seven logging camps in this
vicinity, having their commercial, social
and religious center at Knappa. It has a
fine agricultural region in the rear, with
some thirty or forty farms and three
good schools well supplied with children
and teachers…. Mr. Knapp says it is his
intention to build a sawmill at the wharf
this season, which is very much needed
to supply lumber for building purposes
at home, and which will help in many
ways to build up the town.”
—Letter to the Editor, “Knappa Items,”
The Daily Astorian, Thursday, March 30, 1882,
P. 3
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Photo by Matt Love
You never know what stories you’ll come away with when you visit the Triangle
Tavern in Astoria.
A G LIMPSE I NSIDE
An occasional feature by MATT LOVE
Over the years, I’ve gathered many a great unsolicited story
in Oregon Coast bars and taverns. Many of them have found
their way into my books. In fact, one of the stories, the legend-
ary tale of a drunken Paul Newman, a chainsaw and a pool ta-
ble, inspired and informed an entire book.
It happened again, recently, at my favorite back table in As-
toria’s Triangle Tavern. I suppose it was more of an encounter
rather than a story, or maybe it’s all the same thing.
I was editing my latest manuscript, drinking a Fort George
Vortex, staring at the river, listening to Blue Oyster Cult’s “Don’t
Fear the Reaper” on the jukebox, when I heard a man across
the room ranting at the bartender. The NFL draft was blaring
on television, and the man was loudly and profanely complain-
ing about the high beer, parking and ticket prices at Seahawk
games. He sounded positively Marxist on the subject of ob-
scenely high player salaries. He was giving it to them good and
even threw in the word “peon.”
I absolutely loved his tirade and wrote some of his lines
down.
The man ended his performance by promising the bar-
tender he’d return. He walked toward me, toward the back exit,
and right as he passed, I said, “I loved your speech. It made my
day.”
He stopped, turned and smiled. His age was indeterminate.
He was dressed in denim, head to toe. Oh, I almost forgot. He
also wore a white Seahawks T-shirt.
What followed was the most wonderfully brief bizarre non
sequitur exchange in my life.
He thanked me and said, “I’m agent 99.”
“Agent 99?” I said.
“Did you know that the lead singer for Quarterfl ash is the
greatest female rock singer of all time?”
“Really?”
“She’s a cross of Celine Dion, Madonna and Pat Benatar. And
she plays the sax!”
He paused for a moment and then screamed, “Go halibut!”
gave a fi rst down signal, and bolted out the door.
Matt Love is author/editor of 13 books about Oregon.
They are available at all coastal bookstores or through
www.nestuccaspitpress.com. He lives in Astoria.
After opening at 5 p.m. on one of
the recent beautiful spring days we have
been having, the sun continued to taunt
bartender Josh Baer through the open
door of the Voodoo Room in Astoria.
Pedestrians milled about 11th
Street. Skateboarders glided down
Marine Drive. With this in mind, he
concocted a crisp libation he had come
up with last spring for such a day.
“This one’s untitled,” he said.
“Would you like a name for it?” I in-
quired. Without another soul in the
bar, he seemed game.
The French elderflower liqueur and
rose flower water heightened the her-
baceous qualities of the English-style
gin (Hendrick’s specifically is from
Scotland), while the fresh lemon juice
and sparkling wine added a crisp finish
and some effervescence to the floral
notes.
I got to thinking of other things
that connected the British Isles to the
continent, and I present to you, The
Chunnel, named in honor of the sub-
terranean train tunnel beneath the
English Channel.
Ingredients
1 ½ ounces Hendrick’s
Gin
1/4 ounce St. Germain
Elderflower Liqueur
Juice of half a lemon
Ice
Sparkling wine, as
needed
A few drops of rose flow-
er water*
Lemon twist
Directions
Add all the ingredients
except the sparkling wine
and rose flower water to a
cocktail shaker and shake
until cold. Strain into a
martini glass. Top off with
sparkling wine, add the
drops of rose flower water
and garnish with a twist of
lemon.
—Recipe courtesy of Josh Baer,
bartender at the Voodoo Room, Astoria
*Rose flower water is a distilla-
tion of rose petals. Used sparingly,
it can change the flavor profile of a
cocktail or custard or add a nice scent
to a load of laundry. Available locally
at Pat’s Pantry in downtown Astoria.
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4 DAYS OF ACTIVITIES IN ASTORIA AND CANNON BEACH, OREGON
concert and movie at warren field, as seen in the goonies • seek the rich stuff on the one-eyed willy
treasure hunt with geocaching • meet up with other fans at ’80s night out • truffle shuffle 5k fun run
gear up at ’80s con with exclusive 30th-anniversary products, original art, memorabilia and more
THEGOONDOCKS.ORG • FACEBOOK.COM/GOONIESDAY • TWITTER.COM/ASTORIAGOONIE
Astoria Warrenton Area Chamber of Commerce: (503) 325-6311 or (800) 875-6807 • Event Headquarters at Astoria Armory: 1636 Exchange St.
Dark Horse Comics and the Dark Horse Logo are trademarks of Dark Horse Comics, Inc. THE GOONIES and all related characters and elements are trademarks of and
(c) Warner Bros. Entertainment. The Geocaching Logo is a registered trademark of Groundspeak, Inc. Used with permission.
May 21, 2015 | coastweekend.com | 23