THE DAILY ASTORIAN • TUESDAY, MARCH 31, 2015
FEATURES
5A
Sex talk not on his agenda Tomorrow’s horoscope
By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc.
Dear Annie: My husband and
I have been married for three
years and lived together for 15
years before that. Sex has al-
ways been difficult. Last week, I
found him masturbating outside
in the backyard.
What should I do? Should I
consult a doctor? My husband re-
fuses to talk about it at all. — I
Need Help
Dear Need: If sex has been
an issue for the past 18 years,
there is more going on. Your let-
ter doesn’t provide many details.
Is he masturbating because you
aren’t interested in sex? In that
case, please talk to your doctor
and see what can be done. Does
he prefer self-gratification to be-
ing with you? That could indicate
that he has an idealized version of
the female body due to excessive
pornography viewing. Or he could
be gay and still in the closet. Or
he might have issues being phys-
ically close. For this, counseling
could be useful, but only if your
husband is willing to seek help,
and apparently, he is not.
As for masturbating in the
backyard, well, that holds entirely
different possibilities. Is he an ex-
hibitionist? Was he hoping some-
one would see him? That could get
Annie’s
Mailbox
Creators
Syndicate Inc.
Kathy Mitchell
and
Marcy Sugar
him arrested.
Your choice is to decide how
important this is to you compared
to the more positive things your
husband brings to the marriage.
Can you accept it and still have a
happy marriage? Does it merit a
divorce? Sometimes, counseling
for the person most affected (you)
can be helpful in working through
a problem and coming to a deci-
sion. Please consider it.
Dear Annie: I had a strong re-
action to the letter from “Missing
It,” whose husband had a prosta-
tectomy. I am a prostate cancer
survivor who had a prostatecto-
my, and my experience has been
nothing like her husband’s. No
one who is facing prostate cancer
should take her husband’s story as
typical.
Did her husband faithfully do
his physical therapy exercises
to prevent incontinence? I did,
at least three times a day. I’ve
had complete control for years. I
worked with my urologist on sex-
ual activity, and we experimented
with various therapies because
there are many options. I had to do
my part, but my sex life is now as
satisfactory as it was prior to the
surgery.
To other men with a prostate
cancer diagnosis who choose the
prostatectomy route, if you do
your part, there is every reason to
hope for complete recovery and a
fully normal and satisfying life. —
Not Missing Anything
Dear Not Missing: Thank
you for pointing out that there
are individual responses to pros-
tate surgery, and a great deal de-
pends upon how dedicated one is
to doing the necessary exercis-
es and therapies. There are also
other options besides prostatec-
tomy. For all men facing this, it
is important to find a physician
who knows what treatments are
available and can discuss them
clearly, along with the potential
outcomes. And if the doctor isn’t
doing that, get a second opinion
or find another doctor. This is
your future. You need to be your
own best advocate.
FRANK AND ERNEST
BLONDIE
THATABABY
SALLY FORTH
STONE SOUP
B.C.
LOLA
DILBERT
SIX CHIX
BIZARRO
MUTTS
NON SEQUITUR
BABY BLUES
WIZARD OF ID
ZITS
ROSE IS ROSE
ARIES (March 21-April 19). A social sit-
uation is overwrought with complications.
Lately it’s getting harder and harder to
choose the right words to say. A wise man
once said nothing.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20). You’re no
marionette controlled by the hand of fate.
You move freely where you want to go. Then
again, every once in a while you ask for a lift,
and sometimes (like now) the asking makes
it happen.
GEMINI (May 21-June 21). You’ll look
back and wonder whether you made the
right decision. It was the decision that, at the
time, had to be made. You would do it again
were you back there. Don’t let the pretty col-
ors of nostalgia change your view.
CANCER (June 22-July 22). Items, hab-
its and thoughts that you carry along with
you have a way of becoming who you are.
This is your chance to emotionally strip
down and choose carefully what you want
to put back on.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). Your instincts are
like knives: They need to be sharpened by
rubbing them against the ridged steel or, in
today’s case, the tricky problem. Solving this
one will help you cut to the chase later in the
week.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). Glamour cre-
ates attraction, attraction creates opportuni-
ties, and opportunities create income. That’s
why you’ll take the time to gloss up a presen-
tation until it’s slick.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). If you don’t
quite know what you want today, at least you
know what you don’t want. You’ll witness a
person in a state of being that you do not
wish to have as your own, and this will in-
spire your behavior.
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Lift the stip-
ulations, amend the rules, knock out the ob-
stacles that limit the ways in which you allow
yourself to experience happiness. Decide to
be happy no matter what happens, and you
will be.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). Don’t
leave the bad feelings trapped inside of you,
or they’ll fester and spoil your internal sys-
tem. A pinprick of acknowledgement may be
all that’s necessary to let out the tension.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). You’re a
sincere person, and you respond to others
who share this quality. You also have an
internal alarm that goes off when you hear
stories or marketing pitches that don’t add
up. Listen to and save the information.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). Money
might not be the biggest thing at stake. It’s
the life energy you put into making money
that gives it the charge, and that is the true
exchange in the purchase and sale of goods
and services.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). You can
think of past instances when people have
been kind to you who didn’t have to be, and
it’s part of the reason you extend yourself
with such a generous heart today.
WEDNESDAY’S BIRTHDAY (April 1).
This month your mind will fill with profound
insight, and you’ll need an outlet to express
it. You could touch the lives of others through
art, writing, public speaking or teaching. In
June, you’ll be paid for the good you do and
sent on a mission. August brings heart-ful-
filling developments and passionate pursuit.
Aries and Sagittarius people adore you. Your
lucky numbers are: 12, 1, 44, 17 and 38.