FEATURES 8A She seeks help with gender Dear Annie: I’ve lived my entire life feeling as though I was born the wrong gender. Transitioning is not an option. I was born female and look it. I would have a hard time passing as male. Also, I have heard nothing but horror stories regarding the surgery. There appears to be resources galore for those changing from male to female, but everything I’ve read about my situation seems to assume I must be a lesbian. This is not the case. I am attracted to men. If I transitioned to male, I would be a gay man. I’m not really sure what to call myself. Because I will not be transitioning, “trans- gender” doesn’t fit, and “transvestite” doesn’t cover it. I realize I am still a female, but I feel humiliated wearing dresses and skirts. I don’t find anything sexy about women’s clothing, as a transvestite might. There seems to be no place in the LGBT community for my situation. My peers have told me that I am gay. Oth- HUVVD\,ZLOOQHYHU¿QGVRPHRQHWRORYH unless I become more “feminine.” All of this indicates that my personality doesn’t matter. I have done extensive therapy for bipolar disorder in the past, but it hasn’t been helpful. One therapist actually told me my aversion to dresses means I had been sexually abused, even if I have no recollection of it. I am on medication for bipolar dis- order, but only recently have I admitted to myself that the root of my problem is breast is larger, but I don’t see how that would affect the veins.) What should I GR"²%RWK6LGHV1RZ Dear Both: According to our medi- Creators cal experts, there is no reason to be over- Syndicate Inc. ly concerned. As one physician put it, “Breasts are sisters, not twins,” meaning Kathy Mitchell the size and vein patterns aren’t symmet- and rical. Instead of letting your boyfriend Marcy Sugar diagnose you, please talk to your doctor about this. probably my gender dysphoria. I wake up Dear Annie: My heart went out to every morning disappointed that I am still ³'HVSHUDWHIRU$QVZHUV´ZKRVDLGKHU trapped. Are there any resources for my parents compared her to her sibling, and VSHFL¿FGLOHPPD"²Forever Trapped she came up short. Dear Forever: We are sorry you In junior high, I felt inferior to my KDYH KDG VR PXFK GLI¿FXOW\ ¿QGLQJ siblings because they got good grades, support. There are several organizations but no matter how much time I spent on that help the LGBT community. We also my homework, my grades were never as know that many surgical outcomes for good. I rarely saw them working at all, transitioning female to male have been and here I was, trying so hard. VXFFHVVIXO<RXFDQ¿QGUHVRXUFHVDQG Years later, I discovered I was dys- information through The Community of lexic, and reading was complicated and LGBT Centers (LGBTCenters.org), the GLI¿FXOWIRUPH$OVRZKHQ,ZDVLQWKH Human Rights Campaign (hrc.org) and ninth grade, an observant science teach- 3)/$*SÀDJRUJDVZHOODV*/$$' er told my parents I needed glasses. I org, femaletomale.org, ftmguide.org and thought everyone saw things the same the GLBT National Help Center (glbtna- way I did. I was shocked when I walked tionalhelpcenter.org). RXWRIWKHRSWRPHWULVW¶VRI¿FH Dear Annie: My breasts have very ³'HVSHUDWH´ VKRXOG KDYH KHU H\HV obvious veins visible near the surface of checked and also see whether there are the skin. The left and right breasts have any hidden learning disabilities. It was very different vein patterns. too late for me when I made my discov- My boyfriend says the veins should ery, but hopefully, it won’t be too late for be symmetrical or nearly so. (My left KHU² Been There, Done That Annie’s Mailbox FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH STONE SOUP B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE THE DAILY ASTORIAN • TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 3, 2015 Tomorrow’s horoscope By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. ARIES (March 21-April 19). Any- thing you do to increase your powers of self-control will have long-term benefits. If you can control yourself, you will have greater influence over others. TAURUS (April 20-May 20). Why waste your time on pursuits that most people can do? There are benefits to specializa- tion. Pursue the things you are naturally best at. Evening will bring a moneymaking opportunity. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). You’ve been going nonstop. You need a period of rest to recharge and get inspired again. If you can’t make it happen today, at least you can plan and prepare for a time in the near future. CANCER (June 22-July 22). All prog- ress will start with acceptance. Acknowl- edge the reality and accept everything about it. Once you do, you will be able to begin working with what you’ve been dealt. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). When you feel afraid, you don’t need to run away to find relief. Just wait and let the relief come to you. It will, and much more quickly than you think. You’re stronger than you know. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). The day calls for kindness and compassion from you to you. Make yourself comfortable. If you can’t figure out how to do it, experiment with possibilities until you find what works. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). The comple- tion of an important project is near. It’s im- portant to have something in the works for when this is finished to minimize the sense of loss that accompanies such endings. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). It turns out that “happily ever after” is created one happy moment at a time. The special thing that happens this week is that you recognize contentment when you experi- ence it. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). The opportunity available to you is great only in proportion to your ability to make use of it. For now, focus on educating yourself so that when the truly prime opportunity arises, you’ll know exactly what to do. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). How you get there may be just as important as what you do when you arrive, except that no one other than you saw that part. You have to feel good about your methods, but at the same time, you don’t have to broad- cast them. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). Children are magical. It may take some time for the magic to emerge — after all, they do need special care — but if you’re lucky enough to know a child, it will be worth the trouble. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Soon after you master a skill, you will tire of it. That’s why it’s important to have something new on the horizon to look forward to. You’ll get ideas on the commute, in the shower or while preparing food. WEDNESDAY’S BIRTHDAY (Feb. 4). The theme is bravery and honesty. The truth will blow open a closed door. An exclusive club will let you in, a defensive person will let down the guard and a hard bargain will go soft. You’ll meet some- one special in March. Beautiful scenery in June could lead to a move. A break- through comes in August. Aries and Libra adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 14, 39, 2, 1 and 19.