CM 5
MOBKING ENTERPRISE, SATURDAY, APRIL 20, 1912.
WAKING UP A
TOWN
By M. QUAD
Copyright. 1912, by Associated Lit
erary Press.
"Do you know, sir," said Deacon
Sling'er to Abraham Scott in front of
the postofflee one evening "do you
know that this town of Beverly is
Blow, the slowest in the state?"
"Yes; business seems to drop off a
little every year," was the peply.
"And why are we dead and dying
here?" asked the deacon as he step
ped up on the platform beside a bar
rel of kerosene, for it was postofflee
and grocery combined.
He waited till his audience had shut
and pocketed their jaekknives and
then answered his own question.
"Because nothing ever happens here.
Does any one die? Do we have any
funerals? Does any one ever get mar
ried? Does any one steal? Has any
one present even se'en a dog fight in
the last two years?"
"No, no!"
"Something ought to be done, dea
con," suggested a voice.
"And don't I know it? Don't we
all know it?"
"Might call a public meeting and
resolve," was a second suggestion.
"Resolve what that we are going to
the dogs?"
"Our forefathers did that, and then
we licked the British."
"But where's your British to lick
now? I've been thinking this thing
over for two years, and I hain't lit on
a remedy yet. I've got a whole barrel
of molasses in the cellar, and I'll give
it to the critter who can wake this
town up."
The critter to do it was right at
hand. The deacon meant a human be
ing, but the critter was an old spotted
bull coming down the highway. The
crowd at the postofflee was scratching
Its head and almost tasting that mo
lasses when the bull turned a corner
and saw his golden opportunity. He
charged with a snort and a bellow,
and after smashing three gates that
were swinging open he was at the
postofflee. He knocked the crowd right
and left. He cleared the platform of
barrels and boxes. He ran his horns
through windows.
The bull came and saw and did
things and went his way. It was a
fine beginning to wake up a town.
None of the three doctors in it had even
had a case of measles in six mouths.
Now they hai thirteen bull horned and
bull kicked victims to practice on. In- j
stead of every light being out by 9
o'clock they were burning in almost
every house at midnight.
Next morning the town was early
astir to repair damages and exchange
opinions, and no one was looking for
anything more to happen when the old
bull came charging again. Instead of
being miles away he had slept just out
side the town to be ready for an early
call. That bellow was like the fall of
a brick house. There were three farm
ers' teams on the street, early as it
was. To play ball with them was fun
for the bull. He put his horns under
old Mrs. Baxter as she was crossing
the street to borrow an egg and tossed
her over a fence to come down head
first in a to"ofn notch r
Elder SouthCeld ia tHe so!ar plexus and
knocked him the length of a black
smith shop.
There was no loafing on the part of
that bull. He was at work every min
ute of the time, and when he finally
quit it was because there was nothing
more in his line to be done. On this
occasion our staff correspondent sim
ply telegraphed :
"I have seen the dead and dying, and
I have gazed on the wide wrought de
struction, and 1 am simply overcome."
At sundown scouts that" had been
sent out reported that nothing had
been seen of the bull, and it was be
lieved that he had retired to some
place where the r.ites were nst too
high to commit suicide. There was
great felicitation and an attempt to di
business, but the old bull had fooled
'em. With the same oU bellow, same
horns, ssme he came charging in
for the third linje. He wa3 willing to
work overtime without extra pay.
They had axen and clubs and eras-bars
and guns rerdy for b.m this time, but
they knew him not.
Abner Goodhue iind his wife were
going to prayer meeting. .Over a fence
they went instead. Aaron IJttlefield
and his lnoMier-iu-law were going to
sit up" with one, of the injured on the
first charge. Aaron save.l himself by
climbing a locust tree, but the woman
was kicked in the head and never
spoke again. tliou.irh,she lived on for
twenty years.
There were a score more cases like
the above, but our staff correspondent
didn't particularize. He couldn't. His
emotions were too great. He had to
simply say:
"My grandfather was at Gettysburg,
but he saw nothing like this. I simply
stand appalled and ask myself who is
who." "
If yon should enter that town today
you would find 23,000 population in
lace of 2,000. You would find a brick
postofEce with a lot of old men sitting
around, and one of them would be like
ly to ask:
"Deacon Slinger, wasn't there a time
In the uistory of Beverly when she
sorter stood still?"
And the answer would be:
"There was, sir."
"And then the snow shovel factory
came to give her an Impetus?"
"Snow shovel factory be durne'd! It
was an old spotted bull, and we orter
have a bronze statue of him on every
street corno"'"
ARTISANS HAVE MUSICAL
AND LITERARY PROGRAM
The Artisans held a most enjoyable
meeting in Woodmen hall Tuesday
evening. It was the regular social
night and there was a large attend
ance. , The early part of the evening
business of the order was transacted
and several applications for member
ship were filed. A short musical and
literary program was givea during the
evening which was followed by dan
cing. The committee In charge of the
meeting was composed of Mrs. Paul
Naumaan, Mrs. Richard Tobia and
Mrs. Pauline Schwartz.
A Sure Sign.
"How do you know he's a stranger?"
"I saw him set his watch by the town
clock." Cornell Widow.
ireo duica.
Intoxicating liquors have been made
from the sap of the birch, the willow,
the poplar and the sycamore.
AMONG THE CHURCHES
First Baptist Church Rev. W. T. Mill
iken pastor. Morning worship at
10:30. Dr. Milliken will speak upon
"The Divine Christ." Evening wor
ship at 1 : 30. In the evening the
pastor will speak especially to men,
his topic being "Is the Young Maa
Absalom Safe?" Bible schooL at
10:00. H. E. Cross, Superintendent.
Junior C. E. at 3:00. Y. P. S C.
E. at 6:30. Miss Smith Leader. Vis
itors cordially welcomed at all ser
vices. .
Cattioiic Corner Water and Tenth
streets. Rev. A. Hillebrand pastor:
residence 912 Water; Low Mass 8
a. m., with sermot; High Mass
10:30 a. m.; afternoon service at
4; Mass every morning at 8.
Congregational Church George Nel
son Edwards, pastor. Residence,
716 Center Street Phone, Main
395. Morning service 10:30, subject,
S. S. at ll:15,Christian Endeavor
at 6:30. Evening service at 7:30.
First Church of Christ, Scientist
Ninth and Center street. Services
Sunday, 11; Sunday school immed
iately following service; Wednes
day evening meeting at 8. Topic,
"Doctrine of Atonement."
German Evangelical Corner Eighth
and Madison streets, Rev. F.
Wievesick pastor, residence 713
Madisou; Sunday school 10 a. m.,
ing Wednesday at 7:30 9. m.
Mountain View Union (Congrega
tional) Sunday school 3 p. m.,
Herman Schrader, Monroe street,
superintendent; morning service
. 11; Young People at 7 P. m. anC
preaching at 8 p. m.; prayer meet
Mrs. J. H. Quinn,- superintendent;
BlDle Study every Thursday after
noon. First Methodist Episcopal Church
"The Church of the cordial wel
come." T. B. Ford, minister, resi
dence 602, Eleventh street. Resi
dence phone Main 96. Office phone
Main 59. Study in the church.
Prof. Elner, choir director. Sadie
Evelya Ford, organist.
First Presbyterian Church Rev. J. R.
Landsborough minister. Sabbath
School at 10:00 o'clock, Mrs. W. C.
Green Superintendent. Morning
worship at 11:00 d'clock. Subject
"The Law Fulfilled." Y. P. S. C.
E. at 6:45. Evening worship at 7:30
Subject, "Overwhelmed by the
Deep. Special reference to the Ti
tanic disaster. All welcome.
Parkplace Congregational Rev. Z. I
Jones pastor, residence Clackamas;
Christian Endeavor Thursday eve
ning 7:30. Sunday school 10, Emery
French superintendent; preaching
services each Sunday, alternating
between 11 a. m. and 7:30 p. m.;
St PauUs Protestant Episcopal Church
C. W. Robinson, rector. Holy
Communion at 8 o'clock Sunday,
and Sunday school at 10 o'clock.
Holy Communion anl morning pray
er and sermon at 11 o'clock. Even
ing prayer and sermon at 7:30.
Willamette M. E. Church Regular
preaching at 2 p. m. Sunday school
3:15 p. m., Mrs. Fromong, superin
tendent. West Oregon City School House J. O-
Staats will preach at 10 a. m. Sun
day school conducted after service.
Church of the United Brethren in
Christ Rev. F. Clack, pastor. Sab
points in the afternoon. Ha will
have a mid-week service at Will
amette on each Wednesday evening.
Missionary Pastor's Program for
month of April. Rev? E. A. Smith
will preach during April as follows:
Logan, April 7 and 21, in both morn
ing and evening. Redland on the
same date at 3 in the afternoon.
Highland, 14 and 28, both morning
and evening.
WOOL GROWERS HOLD
ON FOR HIGH PRICE
With foreign markets for wool the
highest ever known and with less
stock' in America than for many years,
the situation in the woolen trade is
mixed. The apparent lack of interest
that tha big buyers are showing in
the trade is evidently an acted part
for the sole purpose of influencing
quotations downward.
That some weeks ago less than 20,
000,000 pounds of old wool were avail
able in the United States has been
the assertion of an official of the
National Wool Growers' association,
who seemingly was in a postition, as
good as any, to know where the stock
was held.
On every hand the various interests
are apart in their views. There is de
termination on the part of leading
buyers in the east to check any pos
sible advance even at the cost of be
ing forced to pay more for their sup
plies by waiting. On the other hand
growers are showing grim determina
tion not to' let go until they secure
better values. Each side clainls to
be well fortified, but growers are
seemingly in a postion wHere they can
force any reasonable price.
There is not enough wool for man
ufacturers to hold back their purchas
es for any great length of time as
early orders must be filled.
Prevailing Oregon City prices are as
follows:
DRIED FRUITS (Buying) Prunes
on basis xA. 6 to 8 cents.
Fruits, Vegetables.
HIDES (Buying) Green hides, 6
to 7c; salters 7 to 8c; dry hides 12c
to 14c; sheep pelts, 25c to 75c each.
Hay, Grain, Feed.
EGGS Oregon ranch eggs, 18c to
20c.
SACK VEGETABLES Carrots.
HAY (Buying) Timothy, $12 to
$15; clover, $9 to $10; oat hay, best,
$9 to $10; mixed, $9 to $12; alfalfa,
$15 to $16.50.
OATS (Buying) Grany $33 to $34.50
wheat $20; oil meal, selling $35;
Shady Brook dairy feed, 88c to 90c
bushel.
FEED (Sellng) Shorts, $25; bran,
$24; rolling barley, $39: process bar
ley, $40.
FLOUR $4.50 to $5.25. ,
Butter, Poultry, Eggs.
-POULTRY (Selling). Hens 13c to
14 c spring, 12c to 13 c, and roosters
8c.
Butter (Buyig Ordinary coun
try butter, 20c to 30c; fancy dairy,
$1.25 to $1.50 per sack; parsnips,
$1.25 to $1.50; turnips, $1.25 to $1.50:
beets, $1.50.
POTATOES Best buying $1.25 to
$1.50 according to quality per hund
red. '
ONIONS Oregon, $3 to $3.50 per
hundred; Australian, $2 per hundred.
Livestock, Meats '
BEEF (Live Weight) Steers, 5
and 6c; cows, 4c; bulls 3c.
VEAL Calves 10c to 12c dressed,
according to grade.
MOHAIR 31c to 32c.
MUTTTON Sheep 3c to 3c.
lambs, 4c an I 5c.
Makes Sewing a Pleasure
Drawing the Line.
"Before we were married you said
you would die for me!"
"I know I did. and I would, but
wearing that necktie you selected out
on the street Is different. I won't do
that" Houston Post
fF you could eliminate the tiresome drudgery of
pedaling-wouldn t sewing be a pleasure instead
of a task?
An electric sewing machine motor attached to your
machine does all the WORK, giving any speed de
sired by the mere pressure of the foot on the treadle.
Current can be drawn from any one of your electric
light sockets-at any time--in any room-at a cost of
but a half-cent an hour.
Let us explain how simply the motor is attached how easy the con-trol-how
safe the operation. Ask us today.
Portland Railway, Light
and Power Company
MAIN OFFICE SEVENTH & ALDER STS.
PHONES MAIN 6688 AND A. 6131.
Card Of Thanks
We wish to thank the many friends
for their kind sympathy and for the
beautiful floral pieces during the sick
ness and death of our dear wife' and
mother.
H. J. HILL
MRS. GEORGE BATDORF
MRS OTIS COLE
MRS. A. A. HICKEY
BAILEY HILL
A New Disease.
Mrs. Proud man Our Willy got "mer
itorious commendation" at school last
week. Mrs. O'Bull Well, well! Ain't
It awful the number of strange diseases
that's ketched by school children?
London Answers.
HOT ELARRIVALS
The following are registered at the
Electric Hotel: Joe Miran. Chinese
Revolution; A. W. Barby, Corvallis;
C. E. Reynolds, Salem; L. T. W.
Frank, F. H. Smith, Aberdeen; E.
Anderson, Mrs. A Stevens', Oat Coun
ty, Nebraska; Ed Sullivan, A. T.
Dwight, Portland; M. C. Sprague, Joe
McCubbin, Nick Jehn, Wardner; Theo
dore M. Egfiers, Tacoma; A. S. Noon
ing, Portland; S. Powell, Portland;
George Webb, San Francisco; Jesse
Shafer, Portland.
3V
IP
IL T& I
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Working for the other fellow and What can be won with a little
work a tine ptiie every JU days
THE AUTO
Y7
Get Busy for Yourself
To what people ate saying and
yot will see how popular you are
THEN GET IN AND WIN
Yours for the
asking
v! v .Hi- 'lt' v- 7 - r- - va M
lip " "ll -'; ' V. V ; 1- " -" ' -r?3
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Don't it look good
to you
To stimulate interest in the Voting and o give each one a chance to profitJy their
work we will give a prize every ten days. These prizes will not affect the fina
count in any way as all votes will count on
THE GRAND AUTOMOBILE
These prizes will be given to the one that hands n the largest number of votes
very ten days.
The Fourth Special Prize for the best 10 days showing
will be an order on some local merchant. This order
is good for anything in his store worth up to $ 1 5.00 or
can be applied on a larger account. This order had
ought to be worth every effort you can put forth.