MORNING ENTERPRISE, SATURDAY, JANUARY 20, 1912. HOW HE GOT LIZ By G. B. MARTIN When I was a young feller jist git tin' old enough to make tip to the girls all the boys used to laugh at me for a flat I don't think myself that It was because I was so awfully stuDid. but I was dreadful homely. That was what put tne at a disadvantage. My eyes and my hair were a different color, and I was kind o' rawboned. All- I was good for above the other boys was that I could lick any of 'ein. But when It came to sprucin'.up for a dance I hadn't a ghost of a show alongside the worst lookin' feller In the lot. My ole mother tole me onct: "Elijah, if you want to win a woman's favor do somepln for her. Let her see that you think kindly of her. Your father wasn't a good lookin' man when I married him, jist a rawboned farm er's boy, and I tuk him in preference to the best lookin' feller In them parts because he used to come round when he hadn't nothin' to do and churn and milk for me. When I saw him churn In' or settin' on a stool milkin' to save me work I forgot his red hair and his freckles and his big knees and elbows and sot my heart right on to him." I didn't forget what mother said, and when Liz Bunker come to take the school and I thort she was the purtyest thing of womankind I'd ever seen and wanted her mighty bad I made up my mind I'd try to make her fergit my ugliness somepin like father made mother forgit his'n. But what could I do? Liz didn't churn or milk cows. She taught younkers readin', writin' and 'rithmetic. I could't spell her at that. I couldn't go to her school and say, "See here, Liz, you jist go out and sprawl yourself on the grass and I'll teach 'em for you." I couldn't say that 'cause I didn't know enough. One day after school I met Liz com ln' home, and she was cryin'. "Why, Liz," I asked, "what y' cryin' for?" "Oh, don't bother me." "I wish you'd tell me." "It's them big ones. I can't make 'em behave by bein' kind to 'em, and I'm not strong enough to whip 'em." "How old are the children that makp the disturbance?" "Children! They ain't children. Ke:i Hooker's twenty and strong as an ox; John Wilkins Is nearer twenty-one. though he Isn't quite as big as lien. Then there's Ollie Smith he's eighteen and can whip either of the other two." I remembered what motber'd said, but I didn't let on about it to Liz. 1 said to her, says I: "I didn't know y' tuk such old men Into your school. Ef 1 had I'd 'a' been a scholar myself. I hain't got no edu cation, and I want some. Will y' take me into your school?" Liz said she would. So the next day . I went round. I set on a bench with an arithmatic before me, and while I was a studyin' I jist kep' an eye on them big fellers, waitin' for 'em to do some o' their tricks. Purty soon Ollie Smith threw a spitball across the school and hit Lucy Ellis in the eye. 1 saw by Liz's expression that she dread ed what was comin', but 1 didn't say nothin'. She reproved Ollie gentle-like, and he sent another ball at Ben Hook er. Ben throw'd it back. John Wil kins threw a book at Ben, and there was a racket on sure 'nuff. "Miss Bunker," says I, "which one o' these boys would you like to see made to behave fust?" "Any one on 'em," she said, her voice tremblin'. ' "I think," I said, "you'd better give us a recess. A lesson in good behavior might break some o' the school fur niture. "School dismissed." said Liz. We all went out on to the grass plot in front of the schoolhouse, and I told Ollie that his lesson would come first; that I proposed to give separate les sons and if any one not glttin' taught manners interfered I'd break every bone in his body some time, even if I didn't do It then. I think this kep' 'em off durin' what follered. Any way, no one of 'em interfered to help the other. I soon laid Ollie on the grass, and I pummeled him till he was sore all over. Then I tuk John, who was the biggest of the three, but be wasn't flghtin' for a purty schoolteach er as I was, and at last I downed him with a blow that broke his jaw. Ben said he didn't want no' lesson, so the Instruction was over and school tuk In again with all the scholars pres ent except John, who couldn't recite with a broken jaw, and he was excus ed from school for the rest o the day. . When school was out I walked home with Liz. She was the most grateful girl you ever seen. She said I needn't come any more, 'cause she'd give me private lessons, but I went the next day to see the effect o' my instructions in deportment It was the qnietest school you ever seen. John Williams never come back, and the other two o' my behavior scholars was as quiet as mice. After school I tole 'em that if they needed any more lessons Miss Bunker would send for me, but they'd learned it all at oncet, and Liz didn't have to send for me. The private lessons wasn't much good to me for larnin', but they was for lovemakin. Liz would never have had such a feller as me If it hadn't been for the way I'd helped her out o' her trouble. After all, I got my wife on the same general principle that father got mother. Carved on the Tomb of Ingalls. This extract from Ingalls' essay on "Grass" is carved on the glacial bowl der which marks his last resting place: "When the fitful fever is ended and the foolish wrangle of the market and forum is closed grass heals over the scars which our descent into the bosom of the earth has made, and the carpet of the Infant becomes the blanket of the dead." A Busy Wheel. The escapement wheel of a watch will make 781,800 revolutions every twelve months. Fatronize our advertisers. WHAT IS WORM. Tke Approved Fashion In Coat Sleeve This Winter. The favorite coat sleeve fits snugly Into the armhole without any fullness. Machine stitching is very popular on skirts and coat suits of cheviot and English suitings. Hand bags are more extravagantly beautiful than in many years, this be- SMART EVENING BODICE. Ing especially true of the fabric bags, which are richly decorated. Spanish chantilly and escurial laces are the popular laces for winter, and there Is a novelty lace showing silk and wool dyed in brilliant colors. The bodice illustrated will serve as a model for a smart evening waist or one for daytime wear if a guimpe and lower sleeve portion are added. Satin .and lace are combined in the bodice pictured. JUDIC CHOLLET. This May Manton pattern la cut in sizes from 34 to 42 Inches bust measure. Sentf 10 cents to this office, giving number. 7255 and It will be promptly forwarded to you by mall. If In haste send an additional two cent stamp for letter postage, which Insures more prompt delivery. When or dering use coupon. No. Size., Name ... Address MODISH MATTERS. Shoo Novelties Seen In the Smartest Shops. The new patent glace has won ap proval, and the dressier outdoor shoes are often made in this leather, the newest style having a top of soft suede fastened at the side of the foot with ribbon ties. And there are also among the novelties shoes with vsry decora- GIBL S IIBKSS WITH BIO COLLAR. tive fronts which slip on the foot in thr. easy, old fashioned way by means of the elastic side. In evening shoesthefavorite styles are carried out in velvet calf in rich vivid colors, matching the evening gowns of gay hue. Black looks especially smart set off by a button or buckle of bril liants and in royal blue, -emerald or purple, finished by a small enameled buckle. A shoe of velvet calf gives to the foot an appearance that is svelte and elegant. This pretty dress is made with skirt and blouse. The collar is particularly attractive, and the lines are straight and modish. JUDIC CHOLLET. This May Manton pattern Is cut tn sizes for girls of eight, ten and twelve years of age. Send 10 cents to this office, giving number. 7249, and it will be promptly for warded to you by mail. If in haste send 4n additional two cent stamp for letter postage, which Insures more prompt de livery. When ordering use coupon No. Size.. Name ... Address Carthage. Rome destroyed Carthage during the three Punic wars, which began in 246 B. C. and closed in 146 B. C Singular. "A very singular incident happened at the theater last night" "Yes? What was it?" "A beautiful girl came In wearing a gorgeous gown." "But what was singular about that?" "Why. sue came in fuHy fifteen min utes before it was time for the show to begin." London Express. BODIES JOKE ON WALSH. Chicago American Outfielder Put One Over on His Famous Teammate. Ping Bodie. the crack outfielder of the Chicago Americans, says that story about his being fooled into thinking he was to receive a green parrot in Washington for a home run was not told exactly along conservative lines. Ping admits that he was the receiving end of an intended joke, but declares that before be was through with the affair Ed Walsh was stung. "It happened this way," says Bodie. "There was an old sign on the fence that for a borne run a parrot would be given. One of the players who knew that the bonus had expired put up a job on me with the aid of the scorer, and I was given a note to the proprie tor of the bird store. I thought there was something wrong, but 1 decided to find out what it was, so I took . Ed Walsh along with me because be had offered me $2.50 for the bird. I left him outside the store and presented the coupon. The proprietor told me that he wasn't giving away any more birds, and so I went outside. "'Everything's all right 1 told Walsh. 'Go in and pick out the bird and don't let that chap palm off some thing old on you.' "Walsh went in and selected a bird and said that would suit him. 'Then it will cost you $10,' said the man behind the counter." "Walsh insisted that he had a cou pon, but there was nothing doing. And the best of it was that Walsh wanted me to keep still and say nothing to the boys." .. ZBYSCO CLAIMS MAT TITLE. With Champion Retired, Big Pole Seats Himself on Vacated Throne. Jack Herman, who has been guid ing the destinies of the big Polish wrestler, Zbysco. for several years, lost no time in putting in first claim for the world's championship title, which Frank Gotch says he will no longer defend. Herman has posted a forfeit of $1,000 to meet any grap pler in the world with Zbysco de fending the crown which he believes himself entitled to. Furthermore. Herman says he is willing to wager Photo by American Press Association. ZBYSCO, WHO HAS CLAIMED WRESTLING TITLE. any reasonable amount that no man in the world can down the big Pole, best two falls in three. - As Zbysco has been the most per sistent Of Gotch's challengers and has tossed every wrestler of prominence in this country and Europe, he appears to have a full Nelson hold on the championship, provided, of course. Gotch is honest in his announced re tirement. No one can stop the Iowa farmer from quitting the game, and for over a year he has steadfastly re fused to listen to any proposition from the Pole. Canadians Try Lacrosse on Skates. Begina, Canada, is trying out a new kind of sport, lacrosse on skates. Three or four teams have organized, and the game is becoming very popular. Harvard university ' will open the new Boston American league grounds, meeting McAleer's nine on April 10. Richard S. Smith, former all-Amerl-tan gridiron man with Columbia, has just been appointed coach of the Uni versity of Oregon. Pittsburgh is agitating the abolish ment of the kidney blow in boxing, thus following the New fork, Phila delphia and London precedents. Louis Tewanina of Carlisle Indian school will be a starter In this year's Boston Athletic association Marathon race and hopes to make the American Olympic games team. Canadian football is now being play ed In Vancouver, and it is probable a three cornered league will be formed. Up to the present time the English game has been the prevailing code there. 1 A Poet's Custard Bath. A custom which has now disappear ed used to afford much amusement to the guests at the banquet on lord may or's day. In the household of the lord mayor there existed the offices of jester and city laureate. On the day of the feast a huge quaking custard was made in a dish as large as a bath ing machine. It was the duty of the laureate, clad in official garb, to spring from his chair into the depths of the custard, splashing the contents over the table and the nearest guests. In return for this feat the laureate was Allowed to eat as much of the custard as he wished, which was probably very little. London Tatler. I CURRENT SPORT GOSSIP I MRS. MARTIN WINS "500 CLUB" PRIZE The Five Hundred Club met Wed nesday evening at the home of Mr. and Mrs. J. B. Garretson, Thirteenth and Main streets, and a most enjoya ble evening waa spent in five hun dred. The first prize was won by Mrs. Herbert Martin, while the conso lation prize went to Mrs. L. G. Ice. Delicious refreshments were served, the hostess being assisted by her mother, Mrs . Henry Wetzler. - The next meeting of the club will be held at the home of Mr. and Mrs. Herbert Martin, January 31. '. Present at Wednesday's meeting were Mr. and Mrs. Herbert Martin, Dr. and Mrs. L. G. Ice, Mr. and Mrs. A. E. Vatcher, Mr. - and Mrs. Henry Wetzler, Mr. and Mrs. Guy Reddick. EX-SCHOOLMATES ARE ENTERTAINED Mrs. Charles Babcock was hostess at her home, Thirteenth and Wash ington streets, Wednesday afternoon, the occasion being the annual gather ing of some of her former school mates and a few friends. Mrs. Bab cock was taken by surprise when she was presented with a handsome cut glass dish, as a token of the high esteem in which she is held. A lunch eon was served by Mrs. Babcock, who was assisted her sister, Miss Anita McCarver, and a most delightful after noon was spent It is the-custom of several women of this city, who at tended the old Oregon City High school many years ago to meet each year and spend an afternoon in social manner, the home of Mrs. Babcock being decided upon for this year's meeting. The Babcock home was pret tily decorated with' Oregon grape, ferns, and holly. The members attending were Mrs. Charles E. Burns, Mrs. E. G. Cau field, Mrs. Henry Cooke, Mrs. Wheel er Church and Mrs. Charles Babcock, and other guests were. Mrs. W. W. Myers, Mrs. A. D. Putrow, Mrs. Mary E. McCarver, Mrs. Christina Babcock, Miss Anita McCarver. Patronize our advertisers. AMONG TflEJCflURCHES First Baptist Church, corner Main and Ninth streets. S. A. Hay worth, pastor. Sunday school at 10 a. m. - Evangelist J. Bruce Evans will preach at 11 a. m. and 7:30 p. m. and every evening during the week. The Young People's Society meets at 6:30 p. m. The Junior Society at 3 p. m. All are invited to hear Mr. Evans, and there are classes for all ages in the Bible school. German Lutheran Church Rev. H. Mau, pastor. Sunday, Jan. 14, at 9:30 a. m., Sunday school. At 10 a. m. Catholic Corner Water and Tenth streets, Rev. A. Hillebrand pastor, residence 912 Water; Low Mass 8 a. m., with sermon; High Mass 10:30 a. m.; afternoon service at 4; Mass every morning at 8. Congregational Church George Nel son Edwards, pastor. Residence 716 Center street. Telephone Main 395. Sunday morning worship at 10:30. Sermon topic, "The Meaning of For giveness." Sunday school at 11:50. Sunday evening worship at 7:30. Brotherhood night, sermon topic, "A Disciple in the Dark." Special mus ic by the choir at both services. First Church of Christ, Scientist Ninth and Center street. Services Sunday, 11; Sunday school immed iately following service; Wednes day evening meeting at 8. German Evangelical Corner Eighth and Madison streets, Rev. F. Wievesick pastor, residence 713 Madison; Sunday school 10 a. m., ing Wednesday at 7:30 p. m. Gladstone Christian Church Sunday Bible school at 10 a. m. Preaching by Rev. L. F. Stevens of Portland, at 11 a. m. and 7:30 p. m. Mountain View Union (Congrega tional) Sunday school 3 p. m., Herman Schrader, Monroe street, superintendent; morning service 11; Young People at 7 p. m. and preaching at 8 p. m.; prayer meet Mrs. J. H. Quinn, superintendent; Bible Study every Thursday after noon. First Methodist Episcopal Church Main street, T. B. Ford, pastor. Residence 815 Center street. Phone Main 96. Sunday school at 9:45 a. m. At 10:45 public service and preaching, class meeting. At 3 p. m. Junior League. Mr. Piper will speak on "A Parody on 'The House That Jack Built.' " At 7:30, preach ing. Musical program. Morning: elude, "Meditation." Ludds; an them, "But the Lord Is Mindful of His Own," Mendelssohn. Offertory, Batiste. Evening: Prelude, Le moine. Ladies quartet, "My Shep herd," Gottschalk-Parks. Offertory, "Pilgrim's Song of Hope." First Presbyterian Church Rev. J. R. Land3borough, minister: Sabbath school at 10 o'clock, Mr3. W. C. Green, superintendent Morning worship at 11 o'clock. Subject, "Faith Encouraged. Y. P. S. C. E. at 6:45. Topic, "Worth While Ambition." Jno. 17:20-14. Evening worship at 7:30. Subject, "Stand ing in Slippery Places." One-half hour of social song preceeding the sermon. All are welcome. Parkplace Congregational Rev. J. L. Jones pastor, residence Clackamas; Christian Endeavor Thursday eve ning 7:30. Sunday school 10, Emery French superintendent; preaching services each Sunday, alternating between 11 a. m. and 7:30 p. m.; St Paul's Protestant Episcopal Church C. W. Robinson, rector. Holy Communion at 8 o'clock Sunday, and Sunday school at 10 o'clock. Holy Communion and morning pray er sermon at 11 o'clock. Evening prayer and sermon at 7:30 o'clock. Willamette M. E. No regular preach ing services: Sunday school 3 p. m., Mrs. Reams, superintendent Zion Lutheran Corner Jefferson and Eighth streets. Rev. W. R. Krax berger pastor, residence 720 Jeffer son; Sunday school 9:30 a. m., Rev. Kraxberger, superintendent; morn ing service 10:30;' evening 7:45; Luther League 7 p. m. West Oregon City School House J. O Staats will preach at 3 o'clock. Sun day school conducted after service. Church of the United Brotherhood in Christ E. Clack, pastor: Sabbnth school 10 a. m.h F. Parker, superin tendent. Y. P. S. C E., 6:30 p. m., Alice Boylan, president Evening sermon 7:30. Welcome to all rSALF a n & One half is past, the best half yet to come of - The Pre-Inventory Sale which has daily drawn immense crowds and established a new record for sales at the L Adams Dep't Sto?e Enters today its last half, and it is the determination of this wide awake firm to put forth every effort known to modern merchandising to make the second week out rival the first. Thousands have taken advantage of this Sacrifice Sale of Seasonable Merchandise to supply their wants. Thousands of dollars worth of stock has been converted into cash. Each day the interest increases. Greater bargains are being offered in every department. Daily EXTRA SPECIALS bring many of our patrons back day aft er day. Special for Saturday and Monday We announce even greater reductions on Men's and Boys' Clothing. Shoes, Ladies' Ready-to-wear Garments, Furniture, Stoves and Bedding. L. Adams Dep't. REAL ESTATE TRANSFERS. F. C. and Maria Miller to A. C. and Nancy Beauliau, land in Clacka- A SPECIAL BARGAIN For the Readers of the MORNING ENTERPRISE By special arrangement with the publishers we are able to offer our readers and patrons a most unusual opportunity to secure two of the leading magazines on subscription in con nection with this paper at a most remarkably low price. This means a big saving to MORNING ENTERPRISE mail subscribers. This Is The Offer EVERYBODYS MAGAZINE . . . regular price $ 1 .50 THE DELINEATOR .......... regular price 1 .50 and the MORNING ENTERPRISE (by mail) regular price 3.00 , $6.00 " Our Price Only $4.25 ORDER OF US cut this ml out ORDER TO-DAY THE MORNING ENTERPRISE OREGON CITY, OREGON GENTLEMEN: 'Enclosed find $4.25 for which enter my subscription with the pub lisher for one year each for THE DELINEATOR and EVERYBODY'S MAGAZINE; to gether with the MORNING ENTERPRISE. Name............. . Address. .. .. If you want the MORNING ENTERPRISE delivered by our carrier in Oregon City, Glad stone or Willamette, combination price will be $5.25 mas county; $2,200. C. E. and Gertrude Surfus, lot3 15 and 16 of block 10, West Gladstone; flO. - HALF Store Frederick and Maggie Frederici to Hilda Tooze, land in Clackamas coun- ty, 3 acre3 of Clackamas Fruit Lands; $10.