MORNING ENTKRPRim TUESDAY. OCTOBER 17. 1911.
f
I-
I
IS
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BUSINESS IS
BUSINESS
By M. QUAD
Okrrrlckt, mi. by amh
erary itwi
Tbe Tillage of Eiter numbered 1.2U0
Inhabitants and wat avvuuted an In
. terestlng place. That was why iJeotye
Bailey, who bad Just graduated as a
dentist. rnued parlor there, it con Id
be fljrurvd a atrslxht a a string tbat
USM men, women and children bad
teeth enough to keep three dentists on
tb bump.
; It vii only natural tbat Mr. Bailey
, Should otwerve tbe trctb of the people
'be had come among. He tuet per
haps a dosen in tb whose teeth
were In rood .order. There waa no
doubt tbat the irradnate had eome to
the right spot and struck a soft thins
week went by and Mr. Baiie.r
hadn't had a customer. Then second
week passed. Tftea he went about to
Inquire wha,t was tbe matter. lie ran
wp against a ffrocer, who told him.
"WThy, I supposed yon knew alt
. shoot It." said the grocer. "Some six
yean ago a dentist set up here, and In
pulling a tooth for old Mrs. Joyce
be palled her neck oat about two feel
long, and she died next day. Too
much neck, you see. Tbe dentist had
to fiy for his Ufa. Since that date none
of n dare patron 1 a dentist."
At the end of the third week Mr.
Bailey offered to fix tbe teeth of a min
ister for nothing. The minister said
be was much obliged, but he hadn't
yet fulfilled his mission on earth. -
Did Mr. Bailey set his office afire
and then go out and bang himself T
Not at all. He knew Just what to do
la such a rase, and be did It. lie went
up to Chicago and walked out a bit
mnti he found Professor Donaldson.
The professor waa tbe champion pain-
Twaa tooth, puller of America. By da
he was In his office; wben erenlng
came he d td up as a harlequin
' and drove about tncrBreeta and pulled
teeth without charge. Mr. Bailey and
tb professor had a long and chummy
talk together, and an agreement was
reached. Three days after the talk
the dentist was back at Exter. A day
later the professor followed. lie had
wagon and music. lie had flags and
banners and prancing horses, lie had
tb whole town on tb street, and he
- deUTerW a lecture on bad teeth.
Bad teeth were responsible for head
aches, flatulency, dimness of vision,
loss of memory, biliousness, liver com
plaint and a score of other things. Bad
teeth, filled graveyards. Bad teeth pre
vented happy marriages. Bad teeth
caused half tbe crimes committed. Bad
teeth caused 10,000 divorces per year.
It waa because of tbe bad teeth of
the soldiers that Germany conquered
France. It was only a lecture on bad
teeth and the results thin erenlng. To
morrow evening the professor would
how the good people of Exter what
a true philanthropist he was. There
would be something doing, and it
a hoc idol east any citizen a cent -'
Wben ' the next erenlng came the
professor made a few general remarks
ad then offered to pull teeth free of
charge. It would be painless. If any
one felt the slightest twinge of pain
that person was to be presented with a
Are dollar gold piece. Aye, the pro
fessor would do better than tbat. Be
would furnish sets of false teeth at
the Iww price of $2 a act Single teeth
would be only 20 cents each. So more
headaches in Exter snd tbe death rate
reduced SO per cent.
, Three evenings It took tbe professor
to reach tbe last tooth. No hurt, and
nobody out a cent There were a few
people who sympathised with Mr.
Bailey and called to tell him so, but
he bad folded his tent and gone off
Calling, and It was a long fortnight be
fore be returned. Whnt of the people
wo had got something for nothing?
Ttiey had had from one to six teeth
extracted. Many of them were "on
tlielr gums' alone. fU-nros were linp
Ing as they talked. Other score ut
tered a bins as they started out to talk.
For three weeks they went snout pat
ting each other on the back nnl call
ing Professor Donaldson the t:. -ml of
bumanlty. Then It suddenly occurred
to some one to ank when lie was going
to return and make good. He Lad-
been Indefinite nbout the date. They
rushed to tbe office of Dentist Bailey,
but be could tell them nothing beyond
the fsct that be had the best kind of
luck fishing. Letters were written to
the professor, but they remained un
answered. A committee was sent to
Cblcago. ino miles away, bat it failed
to find Its mna.
Then yoi must see what happened.
Dentist Bailey was ready for the rish
tbat came. He hud seen red itn awin
ant In anrkinatlon. Ills stairs grosned
under the weight of callers. Thev
wanted to be fitted from two front
teeth to all their mouths would hold.
There wax work for a year nhad. and
there ws money In the work, it w:is
weeks and weeks lefore one mun In
Exter would take another man's word,
but bad to have everything in writing.
When a man hisses and lisps and
mumbles as he talks bow sre you go
ing to know what h is driving at?
There was svme attempt to connect
Mr. Bniley with Professor Donsldson.
but It fell flat. Ton can't figure out
--things with your empty mouth. It wns
sir months before tbe churches had
their usual congregations again and
somewhat longer than that before
lawn parties and 'lasses candy pulls
were Indulged In again, but there came
time when tbe stranger who rode
through Exter afterward bragged not
of the clean streets and happy fares
be saw, but of tbe white, even teeth
that met his gaze on every hand.
MANY BASEBALL
TEAMS REPEAT
cocccccocccccocococcccccccccccccocr-
Athletics, Rochester, and Min
neapolis Arc Come Backs.
WAS BANNER YEAR FOR GAME
On t Intsesstlna Raoss I" Different
Leagues Club Owner Mads f or-
tnw Few "Busted Leagues Na
tinl Rao a Qed One.
Th 1911 baseball season ha been
the most successful In the history of
the national gam. Tb nuiuU-r of
"busted league haa been uitH-h lees
than In any previous year, and this la
spite of th fact that th average sal
arte paid th player this yesr bare
been much In excess of those paid last
season and previous seasons.
In the National league there has
heea the moat exciting contest for tb
pennant In the history of that organ!
tattoo. New York winning out after a
hard fight Detroit set tbe American
league "on fire" with a great record
of early victories, but the Athletlca
after a great race won tb champion
ship.
The Eastern league race was not
definitely decided until just before th
finish. Rochester leading practically
all th season, but In th final few
weeks the Toronto and Baltimore
teams were very dangerous to th
leader.
Minneapolis, strengthened by new
players, made a good finiah In th
American association and won easily.
On th Pacific coast there Is s great
raca-oa for pennant honors. Oskls ad.
Vernon .and Portland are now fighting
It out for first honors, with Sacra
mento bobbing up every now and
again to upset tbe calculations.
Tbe New York State league race was
the cloeest In years, and. while the
Wilkes ba rre Barons set a couple of
new records by taking their third con
secutive pennant and by leading the
league .-from th first to last daysy
their supremacy waa menaced until
the very final -week, and but for the
fact ' that Albany and Troy proved
week road teams BUI Clymer might
not now be boasting of hla sixth pen
nant In seven seasons.
So close was th Connecticut State
league season that th pennant waa In
doubt until the very last week, and
the same can be said of the New Eng
land league.
Akron won th pennant In the Ohio-
Pennsylvania circuit and set a new
second of four consecntlve-wlns.
LTbe 1910 pennant winners of th II-'
Unols-lilssonti league, the Pekln team.
put no a game battle, bur lost out by
twelve points to Clinton.
Numerous other close races could be
cited. Taken altogether, baseball bus
never b-fore enjoyed the prosperity
thst hss marked tb season of 101 Tu
and already new and greater plans
sre being made for 1012
WHERE THE 1911 PENNANTS
WILL FLY. '
LaguL UU. lfl.
Eastern .Rochester Rochester.
ftoertbern New Orleans New Orleans.
New England... Lowell New Bedford.
Trtatata Aaao... Reading -Altoona.
Northwestern.. Vancouver... 8nokane
Connecticut. .. . Sprtngfleld . . . Watsrburr.
Texas Austin Dallas.
N. T. State Wilkes be rre. Wilkes burs.
Michigan 8tat. Cadillac Cadillac
Central Aaao... XXtumvt Qulncy.
Virginia Petersburg. . DanvUI.
South Atlantic. jColumbla Columbus.
M.LN. K Humboldt... Falls City.
Minn. -Wis.... ..Superior Esu Claire.
Wla.-Illlnols. . . . Rockford. . . . Appleton.
Ohio- Pean Akron Akron.
Southeast era. ..Annlston Knoxvllla.
Neb. State Superior Fremont.
Ohio State .Sprtngnsld.. .Portsmouth.
Hue Grass J "arts Parts.
'11. -Missouri.. ..Clinton Pckin. '
Tezaa-OUa.....Cleburn
Central Daytnn .South Band.
Canadian .Berlin New.
So. Michigan... .Kalamasoo.. Kalamazoo.
'. Canada .Mooes Jaw. . Kdmonton.
Union Assn..... Great Falls..
Thre-I Peoria New.
American As.o. Minneapolis. Minneapolis.
Western Denver Sioux City.
American .Philadelphia Philadelphia.
National Ntw Tork. .Chicago.
UP TO DATE FOOTBALL TRICKS
Stagg ef Chicago "Java Old Time Tac
tics Will Net Win Championship.
Stags, coach of the University of
Chicago, sars tbat up to dote tricks
on the gridiron will win most of th
games this season.
After he had analyzed the recent
scores Stagg made the prediction thst
old style tactics would not le likely
to land any team on top this year.
Fie Attributed tbe good scores of some
of tbe eastern teams to the pressure
of first ' lass stars and the poor cali
ber of tb beaten team, but declared
that old fashioned football would lie
relegated to the discard later In the
season when the championship con
tenders get together.
YOST DISCOVERS DROP KICKER
Hsrrinoton Shows Great Form In Boot
ing tha Ovsl. .
i
Greatest
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The Morning Enterprise and The Weekly Oregonian
iThe Northwest's Greatest Weekly)
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Until November I, 1912
Regular Price of the
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JUST THINK More than an Entire
Year to Clackamas County's live daily
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for the price of one paper only. Bargain
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Subscribe with your postmaster, or R.R.
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BAST CLACKAMAS
M". T. Kin, of g
Cosrn "Hurry Up" Vost of the Mich
igan football team claims he bns un
earthed what looks to he a And In tbe
person of Hcninirton. the stocky half
bark, who recently showed wonderful
form st drop kicking (ton Is during
practice.
The thirty and thirty-fire yard lines
were easy for hlra, and It seemed to
make no difference what tha angle
wasat which be tried.
A Beneficial 8 Heck. '
One day a gentleman gara half a
crown to a "deaf and dumb" beggar,
who. qnlta taken off bis guard by such,
unusual muniflceiice, exclaimed: "Bless
you. air: Bless yoaT
"Hellor aald tbe gentleman. "1
thought you were deaf and dumb."
"So I waa, air." replied tha beggar,
"bat yoar extraordinary generosity
waa aucb a shock such a pleasant
shockto tha system tbat It . baa re
stored my speech aad bearing. Bleaa
yoa again, atr. a thousand times."
Loo&ra Tlt-Blta. ' . '
Paper and Ink For Our Money.
The materials that ito to make op
our paper muuey are leathered together
from all parts of the world. I'al of
the paper fiber Is linen rag from tbe
orient. The silk rnmes from China or
Italy. Tbe blue Ink Is made from
Oertnaa or Caniidinn rolsilt. .. Tbe
black Ink Is made from Mnicara falls
acetylene gss smoke, and most of tbe
green Ink Is green voUtr nrtiea In white
tine sulphite In Ornmny. Tlie red
color la the seal Is obtslned from a
pigment Imported from Central Amer
fcra. aVftitioc American. ; . . -
Head ts Morning TBotsrprira.
upsrstitious .. Evsr. R Holman 60.00
Superxtiuous are as numerous ard as Mrs. Kate M. Parker 10.25
absurd today as durlnx tbe middle L. Adams 18.25
age. But Instead, of burning our sor- C. R. Thorpe fc Co. 14.3.)
cerers. fortune hunters, palmists and Zella Armstrong 2000
crystal gaiers we pay tbem. Remark- P. x. BarIow ,
able proKresa!-Vlenna eltung. Heathman L Co 10.00
Our greatest clubbing offer. The Sara Smith , '. 10.00
Morning Enterprise by mall and the C. E. Swan 15.00
Weekly Oregonian, both until Novem- w" Danforth 5.J0
ber 1, 1912, for only f 3. Offer closes DavW K Jones 8.00
October 31. 1911. C. E. Burns 6.00
county court ::::::::::::::: 52,
i Mra. Bradtl 10.00
J. A. Jones 18.110 .
R. a Peatle , T -j0,0Q f """ "MUH
. .. ,w" CreoTLAzelle 10.00
R. B. Beatle 17.00 j. E. 8ee)ey 7 00
Clarence Simmons 3.65 T. R. A Sell wood 12.60
R. B. Beatle 22.60 G- Borer ;.. io.()0
R. B. Beatle 6.00 Mary Morl "
R. B. Beatle 28.00 V"
Oeo. May , 10.00
R. B. Beatle J2.60 N. j0hnm 7.00
R. B. Beatle 21.25 Fred Baker 10.00
R. B. Beatle .16.16 Patton Home ....!... ; 16.00
D. C. Robblna 404.00 Mrs. Jessie Allen ,. 10.00
I A. NorrU A Co 29.14 8. M. Kelso J. 10.00
T. O. Miller ., 174.60 A. Pluard 7.00 j
A. Simmons '125.00 Richard Hartgreavea 8. JO '
C. J. Hood 265".36 W. a Krench 7.00
P. Barnes 3.60 Minnie Pulley 7.00
O. Terry -31.60 J. A. Randolph 10.00
C. Slmmona .;. 175.00 Mra. Ella McLeod , ' 8.00
Joe Myers... '15.00 Dock Mosler 10.05
C. B. Baxter 73.60 Insane.
Jail. E. T. Donahue ...,.... 15.00
J. E. Seeley $ 1.00 Dr. J. V. Norrla 1.00
J. C. P. Westangard 80.00 Hugh. H. Mount s. 15.00
E. T. Mass .-v.42.90 Western Union Tel Co. ...... .23
County aoor. . Printing and Advertising.. '
Mra. WIL Dwyer ........ tn 15.00 Oregon City Enterprise .,,...$456.07
J. J. Tobln v ,". Oregon City Courier 31.20
Road Damages.
A. McMurren 73 0,,
Tax Rebata.
J. W. Couxhlln ' 320
Wild Animal Bounty.
T. W. Linn t 4M
W. H. naker It 14 (,0
Karl Anderson M1.0Q
CORRESPONDENCE
SANDY.
Mr. and Mrs. Charles BarlKiur hnva
returned from Portland where they
Visited svirl
Henry Kocb was In Portland on bus. I
iit7sa i 11 is wees.
Paul Melnlg has covered the mud In
front of his new store with tiauu.
plank. His rural patrons greatly an-1
v ctmin me improvement.
Lulgh Barbour, who had been spend
In K a week here visiting hla parent a.
was called back to his work In Port
land by phone Thursday.
J. W. Dickson, manager of tha Fir
wood Lumber Company, Is suffering
from neuralgia In tha face.
ween m the 'mountains hunting.
onAh.sUr.!f;'hXl"y " b""d,? h0UM
wi',nC pS"n 'Pnt P"rt ! ,h-
Jl PrPrty near Sandy.
Strausf""' ,' h4lu,ln ior tb.
Htrauss Lumber Company.
COAL! COAU
We have the best at low
est price. Lay n
Winter supply
now.
Korrect Poultry rood.
. s
Oregon
Commission Co.
11TH AND MAIN T
Oregon City.
Mra. Katie Clark on Tbuw f
A achooi meeuna ""--
urday, wben a three mill tu w
dfor achooi purp
Mra. imyer and
ad on Mra. Morfltt 8unir. ,
Tha farmer'- wlreajM T
farmers, are canning frolt w
aauer Iraut kiilli"
to Portland Tuesday to P""u
black board and a few
tha achooi. . w u
Mra. Oel dauhterln- V
vlsltlng ber tor me v- --
NOT EXPENSIVE
Treatniont t.-. . . .... .. . .....tinn totfi
1 (v " iaa, incinding maaicai aiiru"-i -
b hs, costs n0 mora than you would pay to lira t M flr,,J,
Uoomt ba had from 75 centi to 2.60 V
ln th '-trla ara aerved from SO canU up arid in U 11
u"l grill preM. Hatha range from 60 cental $100. , .
Wc Do Cute RhetimaUsci
Hot Lk Jn,",. kI
and nid &
tlflc direction rf
thousands. JZi
trated booklet d-? gi
not Uka 8nr'u5 0
tka methoda B'0JVa
Uka Sanatorium v
albla, a It HWjP
ly on tha main I
OW. R. N. rall
pedal eicur. ton A.;
to ba had t U
agenta.
HOT LAKE SANATORIUM
t.. HOT LAKE, 0lOON.
WALTER M. PICRCC. Prt5.'W
V "
i