.sr r i vi ,1 . j-i n r ar e m t . a w r m .-ej. il j ei J is iaaBBaBBaeasaBBB'
AMONQ CANNIBALS.
y I WO women have recently dlatln
I gulshed themselves III the Kuxt,
, Miss Klngslcy ond Mrs. J. George
illcott, both of England. For two years
Bites Klngslcy hut) been traveling in
West Africa In the
Gaboon country of
the French Cougo
the country of Dti
Challlu. The great-
er part of the time
wax spent among
the Fa ween, who
are eaunibnls. Go
rilla were encouii'
VS'tered everywhere,
k." i i.i ..i.
"as elephants, hippo-
mish KiNtiai.hv. potaiul and the like
bound. In the deep recesses of the
forest a dwarf race was found. These
people poison their arrows by sticking
them in corpses three days old. Corpses
were encountered sluck nil over with
arrows and looking like hedgehogs.
Mrs. Scott's traveling was In the Khan
ntates bordering on China. Most of the
time was spent among a tribe called
Wild Was. These people are head
hunters and cannibals. In speaking of
tiead hunting Mrs. Scott says: It Is re
carded essential, to secure good crops,
that each village must get, at least, one
stranger's head; or falling In this a
head belonging to one of their own peo
ple. In February and March of each
year these people go off on head-bunting
expeditions. We bad not been long In
the country before we were made pain
fully aware of these practices. In one
day we came across no less than three
dead bodies lying across the path, one
horribly mangled. The Was live up In
sheltered pares of the hills at an altitude
of five or six thousand feet above the
eea. Their villages are very curious. Sit
uated, as a rule, far apart, they are sur
rnunded by earthen ramparts covered
wlth bush and guarded by a deep ditch.
. To enter the villages the traveler has
to go through a long, narrow tunnel-
often lOOyards long
'so low that we
could not go
t b rough without
stooping and so
marrow that two
persons could not
ipass without touch-
ling. At the village ky
ind these tunnels!1
are closed by heavy
wooden doors,whlle
leading to these
tunnels are long mum. j. o. scott.
avenues of trees, with heavy under
growth. Along these dreury paths are
rows of posts about four feet high, with
ledges on which are exhibited the
kulls taken by the Inhabitants.
Inartistic Crowd In if.
Often we find every sort of curio,
from the horrible and grotesque to the
realistic, arranged In reception and
family rooms. Of course where space
Is limited one must do the best one can,
but, all the same, there are many bits
of bric-a-brac that would be much more
agreeable If less prominently exhibited.
To Jumble Indian, Chinese, Japanese
and all manner of articles Into one
place, and In such close proximity that
they continually elbow each other, Is
like colonizing the different sorts of
people under one roof and compelling
them to live there, whether they will or
no. The Incongruity, after a time, be
comes painful, and It seems as though
In their own way the articles would
quarrel with one another as violently
as would the human specimens of the
name species were they thus crowded lu
together.
Keeping Canary Bird.
It Is essential for the good health of
a canary bird to keep the cage perfect
ly clean and strewn with fresh gravel.
Fresh water for both drinking and
bathing should be glveu every morning
and during the moulting season a bit
of Iron kept lu the drinking cup Is excel
lent Never haiig the cage lu a room
without a fire, but on mild days the bird
will he greatly refreshed by the air
from an open window. The cage should
never be less than eight Inches lu diam
eter and twelve In height. It should
have perches at different heights. The
canary, which Is the usual house bird,
thrives during the winter on a diet of
mall brown rape seeds, obtained dur
ing the summer, and occasional slices
of sweet apple. Occasionally a few
poppy or canary seeds and a very little
bruised hemp seed may be added.
Hair Frizzing and Crowafeet.
The majority of women make a great
mistake in crimping their hair. For
some reason or other au overhanging
cloud of curls or frizzes has a way of
bringing out all the little Hues and de
fects that nature or time have stamped
In a woman's face. This Is quite con
trary to the old-time notion. Then It
was taken for granted that the tighter
the curls the prettier and more becom
ing the woman. But modern taste de
crees differently. "If you want to look
young snd natural rather than faded
aud artificial," said a woman the other
day, "stop crimping your hair. I know
of no surer way to bring about the
effect, at leant Just call to mind the
well, not tne elderly, but the no longer
youthful women that you know, and
think bow ugly. Inartistic and artificial
they look with that mass of frizzes
orvr their faces. And bow soft natural
and becoming straight hair Is to any
woman at any age or state of health.
Not necessarily tucbtlr drawn, streak-
d-bnek hnlr: It mny be loose and puffy,
If you choose, and always, of course,
urrnnged with tin eye to artistic and
Individual effect, but uticriinped, mi
curled and unfilled." New York Sun
Hardly Know Her Own Name,
fill nu kmiivn Hnrthil TCnflllir. n'
78 Christie street. New York, Is the
only sane human beiug who ever lived
for two years within a 'block of the
Itowery without leurulng the name of
that or nny other street In the F.usteru
metropolis. Bertha, who, Is 17 years
old, came from Itoumaiiia two years
BKKTUA KOENIO.
ago and went to live with her grand
mother at the address given above,
tier astonishing Ignorance would per
haps never have become known to the
public had not her grandfather fallen
out of a window a few days ago. He
died as a result of his Injuries, and the
girl was called as a witness at the cor
oner's Inquest. It then developed that
she did not know the name of the city
or street In which she lived. She hud
never heard of the Bible or of the
Savior, knew nothing about the nature
of an oath, and, more astonishing than
all else to the New York people present,
never heard of the Bowery. Of course
she could not speak a word of Kngllsh.
The girl seems to be possessed of aver
age Intelligence, but Is simply steeped
In profound Ignorance of common sub
jects, no one having taken the trouble
to Instruct her In any way.
A Woman's Work for a Year.
A busy wife, tired of hearing her hus-
baud declare that woman, hud nothing
to do, made up a little statement of the
way she had pent her time for one
year. She had two children nuu two
servants. Here are only a few of .the
Items whlch'slleiiced the husband once,
for all: 'Number of lunches put Up.'
1,157; meals ordered, 1KB; desserts pre
pared, 172; lamps tilled aud trimmed,
8; rooms dusted (a nine-room house),
2,251); dressed children 780 times; visits
received, 879; visits puld, 107; books
read, 88; papers read, 55;t; stories read
aloud, 234; games played, !i20; church
services attended, 12ii; articles mended,
1,230; articles of clothing made, 120;
letters written, 420; hours at the piano,
Wy, hours In Sunday school work, 208;
sick days, 44; amusements attended, 10.
St. Louis Globe-Democrat.
Women and Their Lovers,
It Is easy enough to tell a man by his
friends; but It Is Impossible to tell a
woman by her lovers. One reason for
this Is that a man usually shows him
self to his fellows as he Is; but It Is Im
possible for his fellows to know how he
shows himself to a wqmun, so long as
he Is In love with her. In that blissful
condition the rude, off-hand niun of
business becomes to bis mistress a pic
ture of clumsy courtesy; the coward Is
capable of feats of valor from which
a French cuirassier would shrink; the
mean, tradesmanly person will stop be
fore the shops of Jewelers, hesitate,
and at lust enter; the rake will honestly
regret the hearts he believes that he
has broken, and, for the moment, stead
fastly purposes to lead a new life.
Pink Satin and Apnle Green.
Another stylish cloak was of pale
pink satin brocaded with a light flow
ering pattern of convolvulus leaves In
various artistic shades of green, and
a few half ripe wheat ears. This was
lined throughout with pale apple-green
satin; the shoulder cape was edged with
fulled pink chiffon.
Fling at the Fair Sea.
He Are you going to the opera? She
No; I have such a cold I can't speak
above a whisper. Yonkers Statesman.
"Just think," Fraulelu ltosallnd, I
was dreaming about you last night"
"Indeed! What dress did I have on?"
Fllegeude Blaetter.
She I thluk I will do the cooking
myself awhile. He H'm! That was
what you wanted me to take out more
life Insurance for, was It? Indianapo
lis Journal.
'I want a quarter from you for that
starving family on Bottle alley." "Mer
cy! I can't spare a cent My dress for
the charity ball will cost me $200."
Cleveland Tress.
Mrs. De Fadd The latest fashion ts
to have the piano built Into the wall
Mr. De Fadd (wearily) Well, that's
sensible. Iet's wall up ours. New
York Weekly.
Old G ray leard It's a pity to keep
such a pretty bird lu a cage. Mrs. Ie
Style Isn't It a shame! How perfectly
exquisitely lovely It would look on a
hat-Tld Bits.
She And you really attended the
Queen's reception In London. The men.
1 suppose, stand uncovered In the pres
ence of royalty? "Yes, but not to the
same extent as the women." Ufa.
A NAILLESS HORSESHOE.
Which fieeina to He Admlrubly Adapt
ed to Its Purpose,
In one respect the human race has
made very little Improvement during
the past few thousand years. This Is
In tho matter of horseshoes. Our pres
ent method of shoeing horses bus not
changed materially, for centuries, and
has always been rudu and Irrational.
One of the chief objections to tbo sys-
tern Is that the hoof Is inado to lit the
shoe instead of the shoe to fit the hoof.
This Involves a lot of cutting and scrap
ing, and Is the chief cause of lameness
and stumbling. The use of nails Is
also a serious objection, as, no matter
how cureful the blacksmith tnuy be,
there are cases when a tender spot will
be penetrated, it Is quite obvious that
nature never Intended nails to be
driven Into a horse's hoof.
The accompanying illustrations show
a novel horseshoe that bus been sub
jected to a cureful und thorough trial
on half a dozen horses. Like a great
many works of genius, the one In ques
tion Is extremely simple. It consists of
a band of metal bout an Inch high,
which tits around flic lpweredge of the
hoof. At the base of this baud there Is
a sort of projecting shelf, or llunge,
which Is made to fit Into a groove run
ning uround the Inside of the shoe. The
latter Is made of steel, - of the usual
shape and style. The only differences
between It aud the ordinary shoe are
the presence of the grooves and the
absence of nail holes.
When the band Is fitted to the hoof
(which Is done very readily), the shoe
In turn Is attached by slipping the
flange Into the grove. It now remains
to clasp the arrangement by two screws
In the rear. These may be turned to
any degree of tightness desired, and
a moderate degree is sufficient to pre
vent the shoe from coming off. The
whole arrangement may be put on or
taken off In a moment.
.. , Blade Him Apologize.
That Christian IX. of Denmark,
whose Illness Is at' present causing
much anxiety, brings up bis children lu
the way they should go Is sufficiently
evidenced by the following 'anecdote:
One day at the dinner-table the young
Prince asked bis father what was the
meaning of a word be had never beard
before. This word, "lusing," Is the
Danish equivalent for our "box on the
ears." The king asked his son where
he had heard such a word. The boy,
blushing to the roots of his balr, con
fessed after a little natural hesitation
that he had been out In the streets
amusing himself by ringing the bells
and then running away. But at one
door au angry porter rushed out and
shouted after him that he would give
him a "liming" If ever he did such a
thing again. When the prince had
finished his explanation, his father ex
claimed, "yery well, to-morrow you
shall go with me to that very house
and beg the porter's pardon for such
rudeness." Accordingly, the next day
the king went with his much-abashed
son and made him apologize.
Discouraging a Boy. '
A boy S or 0 years old stood at the
corner of Brush and Kllzabeth Btreets
theother day with head up and arms fold
ed. He had three ben's feathers stuck
In his cap. He had a bow slung to his
back, and In a quiver made of buffalo
hide he had three or four arrows. In
his belt was the family breadknlfe, and
In his right hand was a war-club. As
be thus stood, casting his eagle eye
about him, a telegraph boy came along
'and stopped and looked him over. The
Inspection lusted a full minute and then
jhe asked:
"Playing Injun?"
"Yes."
"Got a name?"
"Bed Cloud."
"Humph! No go."
"What's the matter?"
"You have been eating bread and
butter with sugar on It, and forgot to
wipe off your mouth! Better stay In
the back yard and scare the baby!
You're no big Injun!" Detroit Free
Press.
IAn Expensive Violin.
It Is reported that the Stradlvarlus
violin known under the name of Her
cules, has just passed into the posses
sion of M. Eugene Ysaye, the well
known Belgian violinist, who purchas
ed It of Paul Nothonib, king's advocate,
of Manche In Belgium, for $2,500. The
Instrument, dated 1732, and one of the
most perfect ever turned out by the
celebrated Cremona master. Is said to
be In a beautiful state of preservation.
Unusual Colors of Animals.
The coloring of animals seen In Maine
this season Is something unusual.
There have been white moose, milk
white fawns, gray wolves, and there
has recently ben captured a pale yel
low fox.
There Is nothing a married woman
enjoys more than assisting a girl to
land a young man.
:
TUB SIIOK AS FITTED.
THE SHOE IMtOPKH.
EYEGLASSES FOR NEW YORKERS.
To Costly OculUt, Cheaper Optician and
t'heapnt Corner BtauU.
Opticians crowd this town almost as
thny crowd Boston, iou may count six
or niilit in two blocks of Last Twenty
third streot, and there are scores np ami
down Broadway, whilo dry goods shops
and corner stands soil eyeglasses to those
that will buy. It costs from 70 cents to
nonrlr as many dollars to be fitted with
s first pair of eyeglasses. Those that go
to the oculist for a proscription as pre
limiiiury to potting on iam must pay
him from $10 to $25, or if the eyes need
treatment from $25 to $100, according
to the nnturo and longth of tho treat
nient aud the accustomed charges of the
oculist
When the patient is ready to bny his
glasses, he takes tho prescription of the
oculist to an optician and orders them.
Being inudo to ordor eseciuHy for the
patient, they may cost anywhere from
$2.60 to $15. Persons with complicated
disorders of the eye really wear mini
two to five pairs of glasses in ono. Some
nroscrintioiis call for two separate pairs,
and no prudent man is content to have
ouly one pair of glasses by him, since
tho loss of his single puir may mean tno
loss of a day's work or cousiderublo lu
Jurv to the eyes.
The most cureful opticians rofnso to
examine the eyes of persons that como
after eyeglasses, perhaps because the ocu
lists do not send patients with prescrip
tions to opticians that undertake to per
form the work of the oculist The most
expensive way to purchase glosses is
through the oculist and the optician.
Some very careful persons always visit
an ocnlist before making a chungo in the
power of their glusscs. Others simply go
on increasing the strength as need seems
to direct It is a good deal chuaier to
bny of the oculist-optician, and some
persons bolieve it to be qnito as safe us
the more expensive methou. it lseutiro
ly probable thut for ordinary conditions
of the eye the oculist-optician serves
well enough. Most persons that do not
guess at thoir own needs in the matter
of glasses either go to an oculist-opticiun
and have him fit them out at from $2. CO
to $15 or consult a friend. This lust is
the cheapest method, aud it is a favorite
one with thousands. The friend, who
wears glasses, learns thut the other is
having some difficulty of sight und offers
bis own glasses on triuL If they seem to
serve the need, the borrowor goes to nn
optician or some other dealer in eye
glasses and gets a like pair. Ho thus
saves the fee of the ocnlist or that of tha
oculist-optician.
Many persons bny eyeglasses of the
dry goods shops. They soil them at from
50 cents to $1, and they look just like
those that the opticians sell for $2.60.
They are perhaps as safe for those whose
affections of the eyes are not complicat
ed, bnt they do not lost so long as those
of the optiuiuns. They breuk at the del
icate joints. The frames, if they have
any, are brittle, and the tiny screws are
weak or are pnt in so badly thut they
crack the lenses. The dry goods shops,
however, cunnot compete with tho cor
ner stands for the trade of a great many
persons. There are plenty of old fellows
that have been buying their glasses for
almost nothing at corner stands any
time these 40 years. They never spent
a penny on oculists, and they despise
opticians. The fact is that science of
the eye has grown np since they began
to nee glasses, and having started with
out its aid they keep on in like fashion.
It is only because they are not troubled
with complicated affections of the eyes
that they are able to preserve their
sight in defiance of the modern special
ist New York Sun.
Whlttler'e Patrlotlo Poems.
Dnring those years of the antislavery
struggle not only wus Whittier's repu
tation as a poet growing steadily, but the
people of the north and of the west
were as steadily coming over to his side.
Of course we cannot exactly measure
the influence of a poem or song, but it
may be almost irresistible. He was a
wise man who was willing to let others
make the laws of a people if ouly he
could write their songs. Luw is but the
expression of pnblio opinion, aud when
the ringing stanzas of the antislavery
bards and the stirring speeches of the
antislavery orators had awakened the
conscience of the free states the end of
the evil was nigh. Slavery made a hard
fight for its life, bnt it was slavery that
Whittier hated, and not the southern
slave owners, and there is no bitterness
or rancor in the poems published in 186S
and called "In War Time." And of
these ballads of the battle years tho best
and the best beloved is "Barbara Froit-
ohie, " which was rather a tribute to the
old flag than an attack upon those who
were then in arms against it Profess
or Brander Matthews in St Nicholas.
Queer Cars For Toothache.
In Staffordshire and Shropshire, Eng
land, they have a most extraordinary
cure for toothache. The sufferer watches
a mole's runway with spade and traps,
and as soon as he succeeds in capturing
one of these reputed eyeless little ani
mals cuts off its paw and quickly ap
plies it to the aching molar. In order
to make the cure sure and effective, the
paw must be amputated while the mole
is yet alive. Furthermore, if the aching
tooth is on the right side of the jaw, a
left hand mole paw must be used, and
rice versa. A similar toothache snper
itition exists in the Cape Verde islands
and also on the Canaries. St Louis
Republic.
Sold.
A wag went to one of the stations of
the Metropolitan railway one evening
and finding the best seats all token open
ed the door of a carriage and said :
"Why, this train isn't going."
A general stampede ensued, and the
wag took the coveted seat in the corner.
In the midst of the geueral indigna
tion he was asked :
"Why did yon say the train wasn't
going?"
'Well, it wasn't then." replied the
wag, "bat it is now." LuuJuu Tit-Biuk
RUSSIA'S GIFT TO FRANCE.
A Magnificent Vaaa Presented by the
t'sar to the City of I'arla,
The people of France nro In a fever
of Joyous excitement on account of tho
recent arrival from Russia of some
splendid gifts from tho czar to the
French nation. The principal gift Is a
magnificent vase of glorious propor
tions. It stands fully ten feet high
without Its pedestal. The vase was
designed by Alexander III., and his
Ideas have been curried out In the
slightest detail. Its upper portion Is
TUB VASB.
cut out of an enormous block of choice
green Jasper, specially selected from
the government mines In the Ural
mountains. It was cut and modeled
at the Imperial manufactory, at Peter
hof, under the supervision of Frof.
Tcbljoff, who also modeled the bronze
figures which ornament Its sides. These
represent two female beads, ohe typify
ing Russia, with the characteristic
headdress of the women of that coun
try; the other representing France, with
the Phrygian cop of liberty. All the or
namentation Is executed In gold bronze
of a wonderful quality. On the front
of the body of the vase is the Russian
imperial double-beaded eagle, on the
other the arms of the city of Paris. On
the Intermediate pedestal Is the Inscrip
tion "Croustudt-Toulon." The vase
rests on a beautifully designed base
made of red jasper, the sides of which
are embellished with the coats of arms
of Cronstndt and Toulon and the dates
1891-1803. This superb present has cost
the Russian government at least $60,
000, which does not include the cost
of transportation. It weighs about
four and one-half tons, and on this ac
count the floor of the hall where It will
stand had to be strengthened.
AN EXPRESS TRICYCLE.
Already Adopted by One Ezpreas
Company for Small Parcels.
Nearly every day we hear of some
new development of the cycle Idea. We
noticed recently the application of It
to artillery service, and also to hospital
service as an ambulance. Now we
have It In an express vehicle for the de
livery of small parcels. The accom
panylng cut' shows what the new vehi
cle Is like. It Is said that the United
States Express Company Is now pre
paring to put It In Immediate use.
The machine If we may call It a ma
chine will coflt a good deal less than
a horse, wagon and harness, and it does
not have to be fed and groomed. The
box will be 30 Inches In length, 28
Inches in width and 21 Inches In depth,
and on the top will be a railing to hold
extra packages. This machine may be
propelled as fast as an ordinary "safe
ty" over a fairly good road, and one
man can do the work.
Afraid of the Weapons.
A story is told of an honest old
whaler captain, who, having given un
intentional offense by bis bluffness,
was challenged to a duel. At first be
stoutly refused to entertain the idea,
neither wishing to Injure his opponent
nor to be disabled himself by one who
was already notorious as a duelist Be
ing pressed, however, he at length con
sented, but availing himself of his
right to select the weapons, he stag
gered his Insolent opponent by choosing
harpoons at a distance of fifty yards.
It Is almost needless to say that under
the circumstances, the fire-eater cried
off and hastily quitted the district
Changed.
He looked at her earnestly. "Yon
have changed since last we met," be
said.
Yes," she answered. "Those red
ones were causing so many runaways
that 1 thought I would adopt a pair of
more somber hue." Indianapolis
Journal.
At the Grand Restaurant.
Waiter How will you have your
clams on the half-shell?
Westerner Xo, siree; I've got money
enough to be as swell as the next man.
Give 'em to me on the whole shell or
nothin", by gntn! New York World.
Practical.
Professor, Is your daughter a good
housekeeper as well as a learned worn-
anr
"Why, yes, she has translated a cook
book Into Greek. Fllegende Blaetter.
Every woman has a certain look with
which she thinks she can squelch a
man.
FOR PAKCEL BKLIVKRV.
l8P
His wedding trip was very short.
For he wus seen to falter
. He took It on her bridnl train,
Descending from tho altar.
New York Herald.
"My husband and I are to have our
portraits painted." "By a battle paint
er." New Y'ork Tlmcti.
"I am going to Venezuela. Yoa may
never see tne again." '"Then lend ma
ten dollurs." New York Times.
Tho Bachelor It's easier to break
things than to make them. The Engag
ed Man (dubiously) I don't know about
that. Phldadelphla Record.
Teacher What Is the chief end of
man? Pupil The barber thinks It la
the head, but the bootblack thinks It
la the feet. Boston Transcript
He Where there's so much smoke
there must be some fire! She But It la
not on that end of the cigarette where
the smoker Is. Boston Transcript
"Good resolutions, Charlie, are a great
thing on the first of the new year";
"Yes, I know, Jack; but they get to be
an old story on the second." Judge.
"What a remarkable head of hair
your boy bus, Mrs. Ruggleson!" Yea,:
but It's all wasted. He just won't learn
to play the piano." Chicago Tribune.
. Mrs. Shopleigh Is It any trouble to
you to show goods? Mr. Cashcall No,
ma'am. But it's a good deal of trouble)
to sell them sometimes." New York
Herald.
Salesjnan Do you want to hare your
goods sent by any particular express?
Customer Certainly, if you can find
a particular express. I can't Hoxbury
Gazette,
Old Bullion-Whnt! You wish to
marry my daughter? She la a mere,
school girl yet. Suitor Yes, air. I,
came early to avoid the rush New
York Weekly.
. With these bacilli In a kiss,
With caution rare, they say.
She kept a spray of mistletoe
To shoo the germs away.
Washington Star. .
"By George, If I were In your place,"
said the officious friend, "I'd apply for
a divorce." "I'd like to," admitted Mr.
N. Peck, "but she won't let me." In
dianapolis Journal.
Mistress I can't nny that you werr
always respectful, Bridget; still I will
put it In the recommendation. Bridget
Thank you, ma'am. ,,Ap' I'll say the
same thing uv you. Truth.
He Yes; I was out sleighing. And
froze all my fingers. She (who wasn't
along) I don't see how a young man
can get the fingers on both hands fro
zen. Indianapolis Journal.
Miss Passee I understand yoa do
handsome work and make very pretty
pictures. Photographer Yes, miss; but
I could make a natural likeness of you,
If you prefer it Philadelphia Record.
"How did Miss Jones become a liter
ary success so suddenly?" "Oh, she hit
on such a charming idea she wrote on '
chapter of a novel and let the poblic '
guess the other forty-nine." Chicago
Record.
Chappie I'm really deuced anxtou
to know what the new woman Is go4ng
to do this leap year. Miss Cutting -Dont
worry. They won't be likely lit
trouble anyone but the men. New York
Herald.
What have you In the past year won
That you at others' faults should scoff?
You find that In the year you've dons
Most all things that you swore off.
Judge.
"This talk of war is absurd, Isn't ItT
I don't know about that" "Do you
think there is anything In It?" "Well,
I notice that Ponsonby bas quit dyeing
his hair, and that be Is walking with
a cane!" Chicago Record.
Lorraine Do you like Masle? She's
so terribly brusque! Dora No; I can't
bear her. Lorraine Then why are yon
always together? Dora O! Her bad
manner brings out my good one more
strongly. Chicago Tribune.
Crummer That Is the poet Lather
brush. He Is a great advocate of purity.
Gilleland Indeed! I don't remember
seeing any of bis work. Crummer
You certainly must He write soap
advertisements. Chicago Record.
Wlllcy I tell you It's better in the end
to be honest Did you ever know a
rogue who wasn't nnhappy? Shalley
No; but, then, one would hardly expect
a rogue to be happy when he is known
Pittsburg Chronicle-Telegraph.
"Which do you love most your papa
or your mamma?" Little Charlie I love
papa most Charlie's mother Why.
Charlie, I thought you loved me vom.
Charlie Can't help it mamum. We
men must bold together. Philadelphia.
Times.
Needlesou Yea, we think a great deal
of that parrot I wouldn't take a hun
dred dollars for him. Pinna He lan't
very handsome, but I suppose he's an
excellent talker. "No, he Is not ninrn
given to talking." "Won't talkT
"Can't" Chicago Tribune.
Dealer A diary for ninety-six? Per
naps this new style will suit you. Cus
tomer Rather smalt isn't It? Why, it
stops with January 15! Dealer Yea! It
Is very compact does away with tbe
unnecessary bulk of paper that yoa
Cnd In the old-faahioned diarlea.
Judge.