QUEER DEFINITIONS.
An Early Eighteenth Century Inter
preter of Hard Worde.
Bnllcy'u Universal Mymologlcnl Die.
tlounry, with tlic subtitle, "An Inter
prcter of Hard Words," was llrst pub
llshcd in London In 1721. Most of Its
definitions nro eccentric, ntid sonic of
tliein Incredibly so. Here nro snecl
mens plucked nt rnndotn:
Man A creature endowed with rcn-
son.
Thunder A nolso known by persons
not denf.
LlRhtnlnjr A meteor.
A Itnlnbow A meteor of divers col
ors.
Wcnpon Hnlro A sort of ointment
which Is said to euro n wound by be
ing applied to the sword or other weap
on that made the wound,
llalloon A football; also n Rrent ball
with which noblemen and princes use
to piny.
Cow A beast well known.
Milk A food well known.
Peacock A line bird.
Elephant Tho bluest, strongest and
most Intelligent of nil four footed
beasts.
Medlar. A fruit which Is grateful to
the stomach, but Is not rlpu till It be
rotten,
Hnow A meteor well known In north
erly nnil Nottllicrly clliiintcs, especially
beyond the tropics,
Mouth-Part of the body of n llrlng
creature.
Kyc An Instrument of death.
HELPED THE BOYS.
A Letter That Around King Christian
of Denmark.
King Christian of Denmark once
found In his morning mall n teller
tl-ltlrtll ttwtt'iwl til in tut nt I I iii I I.I i I
"tiivu iiivivu in iiiuii: i nil ii 11 iu mum
matters of ntnte. Tli; letter was In a
boyish scrawl and rend ns follows:
Dcnr King Wo nrc four boys nt flak,
kebjerb school, nnil Ilia mnstcr whips ue
tally with u plcco of imi rojo ho rouml
In llio Imrlior, If ho ilucmi'l stun there
will ho it nro.
Vho mimu of the teacher being given,
tliu king ordered him to report at once
to the minister of Justice, while he
took the next train for I'lakkebjerh
mid examined the class In the teacher's
absence. The children, mm wed by tint
presence of the cruel teacher, told their
grievance to tho kindly old king, who
promised Imuieillale relief, closed the
ochool for tho day runl ordered that the
boys bo treated to chocolate mid cakes
nt his expense "to remember him by."
Hut ho did more than that. On re
turning to Copenhagen ho dismisses
tho cruel teacher without pension, nt
tho samo lime giving n general warn
lug to all teachers to be chary of cor
pornl punishment. "If Istys cannot be
trained without cruel beatings," this
wise king said, "then there must bo
something tho matter with those wli
train them, Thu coming generation
must nut bo mado rulllnits by nilllanly
tcacnerH."
Premiums for Subscriptions
Wc wish to double our subscription list within the next thirty days. In order to do this wc have purchased a
splendid line of premiums which wc will give to our subscribers and to club getters.
tut Aiuomnr rtMSim tmi (m CERT'F'CfT.f.,f
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c?pttif -MgaMiMaMagSIZ35Mi&'' v!BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBv
sff Bl r.iiDDLIEn AND GUARANTEE!) BY
r - Hamilton silver Co. WJ
E"2BBHmHBjgW Factory B Muncie.Ihd. jy
sine vitvt showno
TCNSIOM srniNB
To every cash subscriber for one year at $1.50 wc will give a pair of 8-iuch tension shears, full nicldc plated with
five year guarantee by the manufacturer. It is a great satisfaction to have a pair of shears that do not cct loose. These
scissors are worth $1.25 anywhere. For $1.75 you get the paper and half a dozen silver tea spoons with a guarantee.
lite of Wight.
Tim Isle of Wight Inhabitants nre
not nlono In speaking of "going I
Knglnnd" when they leave their ow
fragment of tho kingdom. A patriotic
Corulsliman nlso "goes to Uuglnnd
when ho crosses tho Tainar. Hlmllnr
ly Inhabitants of the llalknu peninsula
IMK of "going to Kurnpe" when they
lenvo uieir own corner of the contl
npiit In curious contrast wllh tho peo-
put or our own Island. Wo regard our
selves ns lxlh of and In "Kuron'." nnil
accordingly It Is only "the continent'
that wo visit. Tho record In the
splendid Isolation Hue Is probably hel
by that minister of the ('umbraes. In
tho Clyde, who prayed for n blessing
upon "tho Inhabitants of (treat and
I.lttlo Ciimbrae and tho adjacent Is
lands of (Ireat llrllalu and Ireland."
Iindon (Iraphlc.
The Tower of Famine.
Tho Torre delln I'lime, or Tower of
rnmlne. was noted for Its growsome
history. It once stood In Pisa. Italy,
nut mere are now no traces of It
Count Ugollno ilella (Iherardscha
who in Dante Immortalized, was the
head of tho (luelphs, and bccuuo of
his tyranny and accredited attempts
to place his country In bondage he
was antagonized and finally eompiered
by tho chief of tho Chlhelllncs. who
imprisoned lilm, wllh his two sons and
two grandsons, u this tower, the slow
method of starvation being employed
ns tho manner of their death. The
door of tho tower was locked and the
Keys thrown Into the Arno,
The Holy City.
Medina, the holy city, triumphed loin:
ngo over all the rivals In various parts
of tho world which Isire tho sime
name, which menus simply "city,"
jvwiuio among mem were the old cap
itai or Multa and Medina KMoiiln In
Hiwin. I he Arabian city was orlnliml
ly known as Vnthrlb, but owes Its later
name, III-Modliia (tho city) or Medlnat
ltasul Allah (the city of tho apostlo of
uol, to tho lvornn, To a good Molinm
mednn thero Is only 0110 city "with a
nig u.
Inilde and Outilde.
The following rciHirt was sent by a
subordinate Inspeclor to his chief lu
tho telephone service. It concerned a
faulty house, connection:
"Found wire wllh no outside outside.
Put (initio wire outside and outside In
side. Need tnoro outside for Insldo."
Learning,
Wear your learning like a wutch, lu
n prlvnto pocket, and do not pull It out
nnd display It merely to show that you
hnvo one. If you nro asked what
o'clock It Is, tell It, but do uot proclaim
It hourly or unasked, like tho watch
man. The wrongdoer U never without a
protoxt. Italian Proverb.
Our Charges.
As is customary, we will charge
for card of tlinnks, 50c; for resolu
tions of respect, si. 00; for notices
of church or lodge entertainments,
suppers, sociables, etc., where there
are charges for ndmission, 5c per
line, but where there are no charges
for these events, we will break the
rule and insert them free. We
make this announcement, so that
our good friends may understand
our rule iu this respect.
:.: ii
Premiums for Club Getters
To those who wish to get up clubs we will miike the following of
fers: For n club of five 11 Wntermnu Ideal Fountain Pen valued at $2.
For a club of six a Silver Sugar Shell and Iltittcr Knife, value $1.25.
For a club of eight two piece Carving Set, yalue f 1.60, or a Fancy
Alarm Clock, value $1.75.
For club of ten a hnudsome scale for kitchen use, value $2.00.
For club of twelve, Gold Jewel Case, two styles, value $2.50.
For club of twelve, n Gilt Clock, value $3.00.
LbM
SIEDS
WOK'S MtM MKCMO I
SPECIAL OFFER:
'Male tM K RatlatM. AUIUwOT
mk too onr Demuaent cnitomer.
Mie Caltectlaa "iH?wi.
' 11 the fines t Tml. T iDlindid I (him, best wit
Write tO'dayi .Mention ffts Paper.
SEND10 CENTS
I u nt kSm. MfHiliinlNnlnnliTdinM J
i eMMMMa pifmiu, urfiiwr wiia mj nig
yuu tii tvat u BeeuiiMsi tii, riuu. u.
NOTICE TO CREDITORS.
Loulso Kcognn Estate
Notlco 1b hereby given that tho
undersigned has been appointed the
administrator of tho cstato of Loulso
Kcognn, dcconned, by tho County
Court of tho Statu of Oregon for
Multnomah County nnd has nunllflcd
ns such. All persona having claims
ngnlnst said ostnto aro horoby not!
flod to prcsont tho snmo to mo nt
114 Oswego Btrcct, St. Johns, Oregon,
wiiu proper vouchers duly vomica
within six months from the (Into
hereof.
Dated and first published Friday,
November 20, iuus.
Illchard II. Koognii,
Win. A. Munly, Administrator,
Attorney. Cc.
e aflH ili&!vfiY lflel iiHBaaeY
For club of twenty, an 8-day Mission Clock, half hour strike, value I6.00.
For club of twenty, and Iilcctric Mission Lamp, value $6.00.
For club of fifty, a handsome set of 26 pieces of Rogers' Silver Tabic Cut
lery with case, value $12.00.
Kvery subscriber receives the pair of scissors, or by paying if 1.75 the set of
tea spoons. If club raisers prefer the cash to the premiums we will make that
kind of an arrangement with them by culling at this office.
Here is a irood oiwortuuitv to secure some of these fine premiums. Call iu
and look them over and get started. Any of them make fine Christmas gifts.
Old subscribers may secure a pair of shears by paying up arrearages and fifty
cents additional. Get a pair. The housewife would certainly appreciate them.
Now is the time
to visit
CALIFORNIA
When summer 1ms
passed in these north
ern states, the sun is
only mild tinder the
bright blue skies of
Southern California.
This is one of un
til ie's happy provis
ions eteriiiilsuiiimer
for those who cannot
endure a more severe
climate.
California has been
called the "Mecca of
the winter tourist."
Its hotels nnd stop
ping places ore ns va
ried us those of all
well regulated cities.
Visitors can always
find suitable acco.n
modatioiis, congenial
companions, and va
ried, pleasing recrea
tions. SOUTHERN PACIFIC CO,
Will be glad to nipply ionic
very attractive literature, de
scribing lu detail the many de
lights of winter iu California,
Very low round trip excursion
tickets arc on mIc to California,
The rate from Portland to
Angclet and return is f 55.00.
Limit six months, allowing
ttop-ovcr lu cither direction.
Similar excurtinn rates are iu
effect to nil California silut(.
1'or full Information, sleeping
car rcvrvatlous mid ticket, call
on, telegraph or write C. W.
Springer, C. T. A., id and Wiuh
iiigtou streets, Portland, or
Win. Mc.Murray, flen. Pais. Act.
Portland, Oregon
COLLIER & COLLIER
Lawyers.
Kooms in the Holbrook building.
.St. Johns, Oregon.
Joseph McChcsney, M. D.
PHYSICIAN AND
SUROnON
Day and Night Office In McCliosncy Block
i'hone Woixllawn 47S
ST. JOHNS. - - OKB00N
Dr. MARY MacLACHLAN
Physician and Surgeon.
Office iu llolbrook's lllock.
Residence, 215 Hayes street.
Phone Scott 6995.
OSCAR DeVAUL, M. D
Office houri, 11 to m a. m., to 3 p. m,
Office l'lionc, W'ocxllnwn 1141.
Kcildetice l'lionc, Union 3901.
Office lu l'ortimouth Prick.
J. R. WEIAIER
Transfer and Storage
Wc deliver your Roods to and from all
Portland and Suburban Kxprcss Co.,
parts of Portland, Vancouver, I.lunton,
city dock nnd all points accessible by
wauott. Piano and furniture moving
n sj)cclaltv. 109 15. l)urliuu,ton; phone
KICllUIOIKl ot.
A. B. HEA1ST0CK
Funeral Director and Ombalmcr
I.ndy Assistant.
Itrnnch office at University Park Drug
Store, phone Woodlawn 1874.
Main office, Portland, Oregon; phone
Sclhvood 71,
Dnnlcl 0. Webster, A. B. M. D.
ltciiidcucc, 697 Dawson Street
Office, I'lltcr lllock
University Park, I'ortl.unl, Oregon
LAUREL LODGE
No. 186 I. 0. 0. F.
Sr. JOHNS. 0IUU10N
McctH curb Monday evening lu Odd
I'cUowh hall, nt 8:00. Visitors welcomed.
C. P. r.oles, N. O.
I, II. llolcomb, Secretary.
Holmes Lodge No. 101
KNK1IITS OP I'VIIIIAS.
Meets cverv l'fliluv nlirlit
f3nt 7;jo o'clock at 1. 0.0.1'.
nail. isitors always wel
come. J. II. Illack, C. C.
Ii. II. llolcomb, 1C. R.S.
5
Doric Lode No. 132
V. mul A. Al.
Hcgular communica
tions on llrst and third
Wednesdays of each
mouth iu Odd Pillows'
hull. Visitors welcome.
Ii. S. Harrington, Jus. McChcsney,
Secretary. W. M.
CAAP 773 W. 0. VVT "
Meets every
tecnud and
ourtli Wed
icKlny even
ln in Illck-
tier's Hall,
f. II. Anson, C. C.
W. Ii. Swengcl, Clerk.
Central Market!
Holbrook lllock.
'
See us for the Choicest Cuts of the Ilest
Meats Obtainable.
Order Pilled and l'ainlly Trade Solicited
T. P. WARD, Proprietor.
THE REV. IF1L R. HICKS
Almanao and Maaazlnal
Lm t
IH
bu .aiawani
mm
Bhould bo in
every homo in
tho land. Ills
weather nrcdio
tlonscanbohad
only In his own
publications.
No other publisher is permitted to
print thota In any form, elthor with or
without credit. Ills 1000 Almanao ex-
cols all former editions In bonuty and
valuo, and soils for3occnts, postpaid.
Ills monthly magazlno, Wonb and
Works, contains his weather fore
casts for each month, together with a
vast amount of tho best family reading
and costs $1. a yoar, ono almanao with
each subscription. Every earthquake
and serious storm for SO years has
been predicted by Prof. Hicks. You
cannot afford to be without those pub
lications. Address all orders to
TUB ST. JOHNS REVIEW.
Pointers for our Patrons.
ine (iiiierence between poor
siock ana nrst class stock on a job
Is a small item when you consider
the value of the job. It is the
price of a satisfied customer. It is
better to make 50 cents less on n
job and have a customer who will
come back, than to use the flimsy
stock, make the extra 50 cents and
lose your customer. That is the
way we figure it.
Photographs!
60 YEARS'
EXPERIENCE
mm
TfUDC MARKS
Designs
Copyrights Ac
Anrona lendta a, ftkctth and deinintlon ma
quickly a certain our optulon fr wLethar an
tutantloa U prubablf nifniAhle. Ccn.munlc.
tlon ttrlct if confident IaL HANDBOOK 01, 1'atanU
nt f rta. Oldest aaency tor ecuniitr mtaiita.
I'atenu taken tbroush Xunn A Co. racatTt
tyttial mofltt. without cbarsa, la too
SckNtifk BmtrkM.
A handaomalr 111 astral ad weaklr. 1 .arrest da.
rulatlun ot any adantlflo kMiruai. Terms, St
Tear t foar uoallu, L Bold by ail newadeeJera.
NOTICE TO ADVERTISERS.
In order to Insure a change of ad
vertisement the copy for such change
should reach .this office not later than
Wednesday, at 3 o'clock p. m. Please
emember this and save the srlnter
For Christmas
It will pay you to get our prices,
Groups and children's photos a spe-
11. S-N . 1
ciauy. uutuoor views, copying
and enlarging.
Mail Schedule
Mail arrives at St. Tohus at 7:10 a. m.
ami 1:15 p. 111.
weaves at 10:30 a. m -ana 4145 p. nr.
Office'open week davs from 6u a. m.
to 6:10 p, ta. Sundays from 9 to 10 a, m
St. Johns Ferry Time Card.
. Leave East Side (A. M.V-lio. :io.
7:50, 8:30, 9:10,9:50 10:30,11510, 11:50? P.
McDERMID & BELL
Holbrook Block,
Jl 1 1:10. i:o. a:w. 1:10. v. Aim
5:10 6.-00,
Leave West Side (A. M.) 6:50, 7:30,
8:10, 8:50, 9:30, 10:10, 11:50, P. M,
13;io. 13:50. v.V). 3:10. . jmo
'so, 5:30, 6:30.