Humor an& Philosophy Dy DUNCAN M. SMITH SELECTED HISTORY. Nnpoleon crossed tho Delaware Or wns It UurTnlo 11111? Tho Dolawaro or Hudson, Tho Illilno or somu such rill. I Ret bo mixed nn rivers, Locations, names nnd tlntcs, But still 1 know tlmt soma ono Crossed something, history status. And Washington, tho hero, Vou know ho senled tho Alps AVhon out ono tltant morning And red hot after Bcalps, Or was It Marco Polo Who crossed tho Andes lilsht 1 know thcro was soma crossing, For history cannot tlo. Columbus crossed tho ocean I feel Utto suro of that And all tho folks confounded Who said the world was flat. He crossed It In a vessel Quito small, but rather trim, DccauM, as you may reckon, It was too fnr to swim. This crossing nnd rccroeslng Make up n lot of life, TIioiikI. ono might II ml n hero Who never crossed his wife, And there was blurc King llutiry, Tho eighth, n turtlcdovo, Who, as tho records tell us, Was never crossed In love. Looking Higher Up, "Ho fell In love with Ills school, teacher, wlio was five years his scn-lor." Humor end Philosophy Bf DUNCAN M. SMITH THE CONTENTED. When crops are good nnd prices high Tho man with wheat to sell Cannot bollcvo that times nro hard And all things are not well. For him tho outlook Is so fair, Bo rosy Is tho huo, lio cannot sco why all the world Can't tako his point of view, Tho man who has a pleasant Job That pays him ready cash Cannot bollcvo tho world Is Just About to go to smash Or that tho times nro out of Joint Blnco ho Is In tho swim. Thcro may bo rumblings underground, Hut things look good to him. Tho chap with money In tho bank And rents that como to hand An outcry of calamity Can hardly understand. Blnco ho can meet tho grocer man With an unflinching oyo, Ho cannot sea how any one On dollani can bo shy. And so It Is, If fortuno has Hctn of friendly turn, Ho cannot seo why every one line not soma change to burn. Tho world looks good to him Indeed, As melons ripe on Ice, And everything Is quite O. IC If ho has got tho prlco. trttOOOOOOOOOQ SOCIAUSTjmUMNS These two coltimmAnvc been leased by the Socialists of St. Johus. They will furnish nnd edit their own nintter, and the editor of the Review will in nowise be responsible for anything that may nppenr each week under this heading. Socialist meetings every Wednesday evening at 7130, at 424 Drunswlck Everybody welcome. MOTHER JONE3 IN ALABAMA Diplomatic. Ill one of the progressive westorn states where tho women go to tho polls nlonjr with their brothers nnd deposit "I suppose she let him down easy." , ,lolr ,,nIot for , cnIU(lftto ihey ko "She was as considerate as possible.' "Promised to bo a sister to him?" "No; sho said she would do her best to bo a stepmother to him." Not Up to Date. "I don't havo much hopo for Henry. Vou sec, ho Is twenty-three years old now." "Hut he earns his own living." "Yes, but hu has nuvci yet Invented n flying machine." best nn orator wns addressing nn audi- eneo In which tho fair sex predomi nated, "I seo beforo mo," ho said, "so many who will cast their ballot for tho first tluiu"- IIo got their rotes. No For Place Him. "He'll have to ult the police force." "Doesn't he like tho work" "Yes, hut tho poor m n u Is troubled with In souinln." Joking. "Oh, say, can't you tako n Joker"' asked tho smnrt young man ns the fel low whose ear ho was tickling scowled. "Oh, yes, I can tako a joko all right and shore It right along." returned tho scowling young man as ho reached for smnrty'M chin with his right It had been thirteen years since I bid farewell to tho workers In Ala- haiun, and went forth (o other fields to fight their battles. I returned In l'JOS to seo what they were doing for tho welfnro of their children, dor ernor Comer, being tho chief star of the state, I went out to Abondnle, on tho outskirts of Birmingham, to tako a glanco nt hs slave pen, I found thcro somowhero between fivo and six hundred slaves. The governor, who In his generous nnttiro could pro vldo money for Jesus, reduced tho wages of Ills Blnves first 10 per cent and then 1C. As tho wrotches wcro alroady up against starvation, n few of them struck, and I went with nn organizer and tho editor of the Labor Advo cate to help organize tho slaves In to a union of their craft. laddresset tho body, nnd after I got through' ml t o a largo number became mem bert. of tho Textilo Workers union I roturned again Inside of another week, held another meeting with them and another largo number Join cd. I wns also going to complete my work on Monday, tho 12th, but 1 had to leave for southern -..nols. lie St. Johns Elections. ' lilcctlon day in St. Johns' was the finest ever, being bright nnd clear from start to finish, nnd a full vote was polled. The ballots inn ns follows: Pres. Iileetors Precincts Republican K gt R. R. nuttier 208 i.ji J. 1). I.ee an '-U A. C. Marsters aof t lt auk J. Miller 206 i,2 Democratic O. P. Coshnw days. Think of these young girls and August lluckctistein children on their fort grinding that K. S. J. McAllister . machinery for twelve or thirteen oamtiel White hours a dny; running that machinery Peter S. Heck V. T. G rider. night I hear thorn moaning rhnll I do, I can't mnko tho mnchlnoL. J, Hunsnke go, It won't wind." It Is hell, worse thnn hell. Think of thcBe children stnndlng In tho midst of these spindles every thrc.td of which must bo incessantly watched so that It my bo liiBtnutly pieced together In a hot room amid Its roaring machin ery, so loud that ono can not henr himself no mnttcr how close nt hnnd. Amid tho whizzing wheels nnd bands nnd switch racks that would snatch off a limb for 0110 second's rnrciossucss, all this In hot air so that In summer a groat thirst scorch Socialist . 138 7 t.t 91 . 139 88 . 138 88 11 .. If) 12 .. 15 ...t.s it .. IS 10 ..25 19 ...27 19 ...20 19 SEEDS DtlCIREfi'S SEEDS SUCCEED I SPECIAL OFFER: M.k .nn mi. twirmannnt eufttomer. Prlrc CollccJlflfl ShllffiKKitt:1 II It flnwt I T.r.l.. 1 i.lndl.lt i.i, ' Write to-day: Mention thla Paper. CE-nin ill csbMi i iii.irtlis ll'f"'lr' MM.. ' I Ull, til .bOOl IM UNI "!" ?ri- i""rjim 1 SALE OF Delinquent Assessments. To I whom It nmy concern: , J. K. Tniicfi, City Tiei usurer of St l- C. Vnrner 26 Independence John W. Hcnnett 1 William R. Lake 1 Michael J. Suialley o Thomas A. Sweeney o This gives Tuft n majority of 133 list: the vote standing: Taft, 3501 Hry-1 f-'"!''' vi-Kiiil In ine. htrcbv ulvc notice Hint I 19 will fell at the front door of Hie city hall fur I ho Lltv 11 M. o II a. urceuii, iuimid- He miction to the bent bidder, cn-di In hutnl. on the ulh d.iv of November. 1008 at 10 o'clock a. 111., the following IM of real cMnte. or so much thereof it will be ncecs-urv to 11.1v assessments and costs nealnst each piece of property on this h Addition to the Cltvnf .St. mil, jw, hu- , .." ... r. : es heir throats, the weavers are en- 227! Cl.afin, 26; Dobs. 36; and J ' ' lit! - M...l ...... . 1 r.m. 1 --:" c-tlod by twonty-four terrific loonm Hisgcn, 3. Total vote polled 650. ... n .Innrnml nlmnanl.nr.. wlilrli III TIlC VOtC b' PlC'CillCtS WI1S IIS fol- worse than hell. A method of com- lows: Precinct 9c. polled: Taft,2o8; munlcnlon hns to bo used ns If they Nrynii, 139; Chafiii, 15; VcM, 45; woro dumb animals. A looso skirt Hisgcn, f Precinct 91: laft, 142: llrvnu. 88:C1i:iIiii,ii: Uebs, 10; and iitij ttu nivAuti u j h n ntxi ui i an t' Iff w and then tho horrors of the accident "'sl.'-"i 1 can better bo imagined thnn told. Their mentality Is dwarfed, nnd White Salmon's Trolley LillC. hv&. S iiiio Addition I)l 1 block 5, amount nseieii f ),1. .S.111IC Addition Lot i, block 5,11111111111! iimcwciI fv. j, Siiiue Addition l.ol 4, block 5, amount ii!wched J9..I.1 Slid MiinniL'iiliist (.noli uliee of prop city Is due by leanoii ofnitcKiiucnt placed upon the city lien docket o( the City of M. jolins mi tue nrt nay 01 .-soveiuner, It they say n word tho cruel boss, who Is n scab goes after them. They Which T "What havo they named tho baby?" "Illll." "inn?" "Yes." "Cautious parents, nren't they?" As a Handicap. "Ills Is what they call a sipiaw mnn." "Mnrrled an Indian woman, did he?" " ell, ho married a lino half fcctlou of laud. 1 bellevo an Indian girl wunl thrown In." Ever roll It? Tho irolilnnroil, tho Koldonrotl Alcliool CucIhuI Ui'iprlmjlnc fioin tho prnlrln oil- Oli, m v I Oh, mot 'lis koIiIciii splliuluU till tho nlr Alcliixil Alcliool Willi uplox prrfuino rich 11 ml rnro. Tlipj- dot Tlivy 1I0I It bomlK Us liwul nt purvit K0I1I Cii(iinl Ciiclicol I Knllicr nil my liiiiul oaii holil- 1'or howvcn'ii iraliu Isliu the stun to llin Imek yard 11111I nmku 11 lon nro or it nmi no ml for tiio doctorl t Unrotponslvt. ( 'Mi AT ARE YOU .St. I. dins Heights Addition to the City of .St. Johns l,ol lo, block 5, amount assessed U.5t. .S.i Id mini itimlii'.t this properly is due liv miMm of asscMiuent iilaevd uhiii the city lien docket of the City of St. Johns on nit' ism iinv 01 April, ntf. .St. Johns Heights Addition to, the City I'lint electric line nil tile Wash has not yet discharged any of thorn tell mo thnt when they got thirsty tiU!0ll Mi of the Columbia lit . 1 1.- .1 . ....11 ..... 1 .1 . . ...1 . nor una uu uui-uiuiiuii iu can 1111 v.- incy cannot get water cnougu 10 llnod Uiver seems nlioilt to lie re trn session of tho legislature to pass drink. They nro nil victims of some uli.ed. There have been numerous, the vngrnncy bill In case they struck ailment. They nro never free from I ittL-tntm to interest canitnl in this ignliiBt tho last reduction. Of all tin headache. Owing to the necessity of III,,,, councctim' While Salmon mid of .St. Johns Lot it, block ),' amount t. ..1 I .....ltI....M ll.H. UIIKMtll.1.1 .1 t I.I .1 I .....I... . . ... I rltftf.Ml.t.1 l. tf uuu'u"l" VU.....I.U..O in..!. ........ i-ii-miing mniiniiery uiey no not cm HillgCII Willi tile Ulterior IOWIIS Ol " 7" ;,' W , ,,, ... , Uliv L'ntherlllir slaves, or slavo llCII. nl nnnn. An nimlonsniit nitiip pnines f..ul.l 1... I.111 il. nsmeAil'llllou 1.01 1.1, oioi ky.niiiuiiui " - 1 1 i iiniiiiitii ij iiiiiw, iiiiw tut 1 (is.ml l l Comer's mill district bents them all. from tho oil nnd creese while tho ilm,. did not kpi.im rltu. fur iln As you look nt them you Immodlnto- rumbling of shafts nnd drums with I osiliou. L.itelv. however the svttle due by imimiii of iiMesuieut plaecd iiikiii y .il spirit all of thirteen hours n dny. They are slave pen nt half past five. They are In sight lo make such n piopoMtion I'ublishe I la the St. Johns Kevlew Oct. i you look nt them you linmcdinte- rumbling of shafts nnd drums with osiliou, Lately, however the settle- due by uiimiii of iiMostucut placed ukii conclude that they havo been lash- iquonklng wheels nnd spindles, mnko nients have been growing so popu- H'jf elty lien docket of the city of St. I Into fear, but they still havo somo them skit. They rise ut i o'clock In us mid prosperous that there ,,,,,mum f'H 'V"tNCU Irlt of revolt In them, 'lhey work tho morning to prepare to enter that .SCcnis now to be enough btisini. City TiesMu'erof St. Jillius. J,. ,V ami November , 1908, "My denr, I think wo must linvo boon iimrrliil lu n former Incarnation." "Does It seem thnt long?" replied tho brute. Averaging Up. Tho man who doain't know Ids mind And cn n't tell what lu do HI1011M ko ut onco and not a wlfo. Hho'll havo u mind for two. Mads Him Desirable. "Had n koihI time, Johnny?" "You but. (Icon plnylng with tho llurr boy," "Do you llko liliur "Saw, but I nln't allowed to play with him." supposed to go In nt C In tho morn- pale, dyspetlc, hollow chested, nnd It feasible. The latest agitation of the nig, urn tno mneninery smris up soon seems ns If Ilfo has no charms for ciuest on was earned recent v bv t he after five, nnd they have to bo there, thum. They can not go and seek I operations of 11 force of men above They nro supposed to get forty-five other employment boenuso tho cm the While Salmon falls near lllis- minutes for dinner, but tho mnchln. Urgy hns been all used up from child- tun, where there is an nbttudniice of sry Htnrts up again after they nro ou hood In their pp'.lrular line of Indus- ower going to waste to devclope for twenty minutes nmi they have to try. Mr. Itoosovelt makes no nllusloi all the electric power needed for car 00 nt their posts. ,0 those undorslrnblo citizens who service coniiccliiii' Camas Prairie. 1... When 1 wns In Alabama thirteen murder these children for gold. I II rout Lake, Pine Mat, Hristol and cars mv. they had 110 child labor uenevo inat 1110 gou or justice will auowiicu Willi (tie railroad til .aw. hiii.'c 1 noa ilu-y yinvcd a very yet rise nmi ibko 11 into 111a ov liinu one, n.-ciilktl. The; ovado tho hands nnd punish tho devoiirers luw lu this way: A child who has hlldren'H Ilfo for profit. ( sod his or her twelfth year can This Is i.ho democratic south, my and such 11 trolley line would double nnl by m.wiid.imilug full width from tako In his or her brothern or sisters friends this Is n democratic ndmlnls the value of every foot of laud trib J"""')' "'f-'V1 ' jvanlme street, nmi a six years on, and get them to trillion. This Is what Uryan ami Mr. titary to the line. We will be glad f "! i m , u Proposals For Street Work Hen hi I propiKil will be ncelved at the ollice of the city lecorder of the city of St. Johns, Oregon, until . o'clock 1. 31. on the 1 7111 day ol .Nov., 100.H, for the 1 rm six years on. .... . .i. ..... ..i.... i. . . .. . work with him or her. They are 1101 uomporu want to tipnoiii, 1 stniid for 10 see me line iiisuiiied. ' tho pay roll, but tho pay for these I the overthrow of tho entire system Me ones goes Into tho elder olio's that murders childhood. I stand for 1 ay. So thnt when you look at incline over turow or a system mat can the pay roll you think this child givolG.OOO Jobs to labor loaders, who vn White Salmon. This will bring n Improvement ' T.ieom.i street from the of wc,,derf,,lly fertile regh,,, in louci, JZiJSM with the great North Rank railroad Milmde In shown by uroillc tliereof, nls the value of every foot of laud trib 1? tv ' v Mr. utary to the line. 'c will be glad ttSUrtKir'ttl 1 to 1 p. , COLLIER & COLUBR5 Lawyers. Rooms In the Holllrook St. Johns, Oregon, ' Joseph AlcClicsncy, ftT. D" PHYSICIAN AND ' SURdlJON Day and Nlglit Office In McChMne, fir. IMABV Mirl Arm iT, - .... ........ uvuiviiiLtni Physician and SurK0. Olliee lu Holbrook's Mock Uesldence,jislinyMsl j Phone Scott 6995. l OSCAR DeVAUL, M. OfTiCe hours. It to im in,, umrc rnotie, voom.iwii 1141, Itcatilctiie I'lionc, Union 5.11, Odlre In Potliinoiilti ntlclc, J. R. WGIAIER1 Jinxiri 311111 vtam. We deliver vour exil in .t 1" 1. ..1 1 t.: irom ........ . ,,, . nutiMivcr, Ltnr Portland nnd Sul.11rl.fli1 uJ..r 1. .. . ..ai'icw rn Wlll'llll. Plnnn nnrf " "7 . v....... n-i u, i.iiriii 1.,. ,1. RIchniomlGi. " A. B. HEASTOCK" runcral Dlrcclor and Umbalmtt Lady AsItaut. tt.-tii.'ti ..rrtrt.. ..i it..t .1... . .......v... ..k . iiivi-rniiy rav Dn Store, phone Woodhuvn 1H7.1. Main oMlce. Portland Selhvood 71. " ""ML LOME ww yti. 1 on 1 fi n ' l i si. JUiins, OKUUON Meels each Monday evciiing In -. 1 . iinics, jf, 0 H. II. lloleonib, Secretary. ' Holmes l.oilao Nn.lfti - T . " utw lirill I.'... l V 1, txiis t-ttini(t 111H-.-IVI WnL come. 1. 11. luck, or IV. II. IIUICOIIII), k. R.8. I . a . . LUI IL. I.IIOl'L- in. I : and A. M. Itegulnr cunimuni lions ou firm ni.,1 iku Wcduvinl.iys of cick II. II. III. In n.l, 1 t .11 . hnll. ViIllinu.'i. K. Chas. Davis. Jonenh McL'lirtw. e ."'!. 1 anfnl Mn4tri VUIUOI iTltUIVCU llolhrook lllock. Hee us for the Chnlccut Cuts of the Btf Meats Obtahmhlc. Orders Pilled ami Paiully Trade SolltM T. P. .WARD, Propriclof. PERT PARAGRAPHS. I'acts nre huiiHltlve things; when lie- tlon gets busy they got m iihIiiiiiiinI of themselves. Homo people lie sluiily becuuso they feel thu ueeil of Keeping In practice Probably your neighbor's sins will eventually 11ml him out, hut don't aid nnd iibot htm In It. The liest Kuurautcn of a man's lion esty Is his need of work nnd your lib- ernllty of imymeut. Probiibly the reason It Is hard for somo people to concentrate their thought is because It Is so dtltleult to II111I a siuv small enough lo bring pressure to liear. Home Merles are luinl to believe un til belief becomes necessary. Home people esteem themselves so neccfsnry to the progress of the world that they can do nothing but assert their claim. GOOD? Matter of Fact Youth. "Hut can you support n wlfoV "Hlrl" "I said cuii you support a wife." "I havn never been mnrrled. How can you expect 1110 to answer that ques tion" Vulnerable Spot. "Knocked him out In ono blow, 1 henr." "Yes, nnd no wonder." "Why?" "lilt him lu tbo solar perploxus." for tho teachings Hons of resiwct, Si. 00; for notices w'" Improvement j be ili.no in nc Practice, not tho of church or lodge entertainments, ?teft, tnllsm, and graft stipiers, sociables, etc., where there 0,1 lllc in the oir.ee of the city re nrcchnrges for admission, 5c ikt corder. . ... .. ' r ......I. 1 11 ... 80 Unkind. 'Thnt man Is my worst enomy. "Uu pectus f. loudly." "Yes, but he had n ehunco to marry my wlfo once nud didn't." Fine rtslnmakere. Blnco wo have dropped the Teddy bears Tho surplus we should crate And send thum to tho heulhen Tor Idols up to date. made m provided bv rcMilutlnu dated September 11, 1 nud macadam laid r nt u provldeil by Ordinance nij, of the city Our Clinrjjcs. or.st. inii. aimi to lay wood wall: u ...... ,,, , feet wldeou Miuth nldeof MbUtreet ex- AS Is CUStOlliary, WC Will ChlirilC tcndlm? b.ick mm Iiikkv I., r - . 1. . . . . ...... ir 1 r . . - . I r V f?. tenkes quite n good bit when perlmpi nnvo uetrnyed these inrnnts In their or enru 01 uiiiiiks, 50c; tor roxolu icroi iiiock 39, jame joiiu addition, thoro nro two or threo youimor than Infancy. I stand for tho toachliiKS tions of resiwct. Si. 00: for notices Hld Improvement to be done in nc hi- under the lush. Then tho gover-lof Christ put Into nor runs n pill peddler, who Is his Unchlngs of capitalism lenhow. There Is two cents ofoverylmid murder. .111.. l,....nlin.l ,.r Hi.. P.hCI ulnt iiul I a, nmi Hi.. .In.. ...I,.... 1 1,1.. .,i I lilll' lllll ll'lmri, ll.fir.i nr.. in nlinrii.w I lUICll Illll IlllUt lie IUTI.IMU.I.IbiI In" ror. iiwiiiii iiniv;nvil uu ui ..w uvv ...... mm. . h.....i iui ...u ti.i n.ivu min iui"l - . . . v . w iiv. viiuiwn I ., . 11 .v - to pny this doctor. You seo It's nil ten Htructuro will toiler of Its own for these events, ive will break the I ;',r iiot'1tJu?,. .o Vr i.,.V ?.'Vir... VT lu tho family. Then they linvo it lioness. I stand for tho day when ""-' insert tliciu free. Wc tmct price, ami no bid will be coiulder- Sunday school, and tho chief guy of Ihc baby will ll vo In God's fair land, "'"Ke uus aniiouiiceuient so tlmt en uuie iicconikinled by Mich check, tho Sunday school has n gold tooth enjoy Its nlr, Its food, Its pleasures. r good trleiuls may understand '"m " ouiukj .urniie.i i.y tue city ' .. .. I.... ..... L, i.. .1.1. : I recorder for kiieh iiiMM.b. Ill tho front of Ills moutli. mid wiien wneii ovory mou.or win curess It '"- Kn. rdd Improvcmuiu.uut be' completed hu Is talking about Jesus, you cna warmly, when thoro will bo no para- . ou or before lauuarv u. khjo. seo him open up tho mouth to show bites, no slaves, when $2,000 won't bo November Sunset conlnins n verv . 1',itt reject nay nud ull bids U tho golden calf. So tho llttlo ones paid to cover tho skull of tho deslr- interestinir article bv Karl Wnlmii rii.?..liT...... . L ,. t pay particular nttontlon to what ho nolo cltlion's daughter, whon tho Ion the rehabilitation of SaiiKrniicis. U .Si8.s7. says. I found thorn nil suffering fron child shall not bo taxed for sueji Co. One can hardly comprehend the ""-bed rock for this purwse will be cuius una mver uiui 111111111111 whntovor chnngo they hav to tho patent medicine doctor, Ono woman told mo that her children of Comer's hell-hole will llvo times to waken peon! ' Mid improvement nennBirou ciuia suau noi 00 mxcu ror suei co. One can hardly comprehend the '""lied rock for this purmse will be larln: and dlnbollcol Infamy; when poodle dogs won'erfully rapid work tlmt hns ,,r,,w,e,l al cnuliernt the rate of 80 0 left goes will not bo caressod on the ilfo been done fu rebuilding the ruined "liffiof Ihe city council. :tor. of Innocent childhood! whoa those city. It takes an enrthiunke some. AmTssON, that her children of Comer's hell-holo will llvo times to waken people nud hrttitr City Heconler. ... . . II...I.. In.l'a I. .. ...I.I . ...... . " II. .Ill .1 ..... fir City of St. Johns, OrefN OI'I'ICItKK Mayur-ll W mice UrcofitrrA. M H.wn Trrn.intr i It Tch Alluinry-ll U Cullitr I'.i.Uliircr C Ainlrcm l'l.).lcl.i-.. W Viiicrnt Clilcl ol Police-J II Wick MitM l'ollcr-0, i;ilKlU Coiiiiclliiirn t I.arcf A. W. IM., C. I.. JoIiiim.ii, I. U. MM Couiiclliucil I'lr.t Wnl I'. J. Miller W W Ulnillr Couiicllnitn rtccomt WeiJi II. C. twuirr II W lloohta COMMIITIUW SlutU Slid lhKkW W WlnJU. M. Mlllrr.C. I Jol.11.011 l.lcci.ic II. W. Ilotiham, II C lluoln, W, W. Wlmlle Water siul Mclit-C. I,. Jolmwu, A. V. l.avu, 11. w noiiiiaiii I'tnanrc A. W. Oitl. II. C Hunter, 1 I.. Ilokle llullilliiG ami Orouiii!-ll C Hunter, r. J. Miller, C I Joluiwu Health and l-ollce-S, I. okl, II, . llonhAiu, W. W WlnilU I.Iuor l.lcene-?l' J. Jllller A, W PiiU. M. I.. Ooblc mother hod gone Into that mill nnd "der God's hoavon without any mas forth their dormant energies. There ''"''lUlied In the St. Johns Ueview Oct. JT Deit He Could Do. "Whnt aro you doing for a liv ing these days?" "Work lug." "Is that possi ble I heard you wcro In hard Hues, but I did not suppose It was ns bad that." NOTICE TO ADVERTISERS. as 60 YEARS' EXPERIENCE When u man has It In for you thu best thing to do U to hnru It out with him. It Is often considered good to lie smart, but we can't recall that It has been esteemed exactly smart to bo good. It Is curious how u lot of talk against vlco Is supposed to bo on eucourago incut to virtue PERT PARAGRAPHS. It Is really rubbing It lu to be stout and havo dyspepsia too. No matter how good a man may bo, wo somehow 11 ml It hard to forgive him for It. If you are going In for self culture, tho only proper way to do It Is to begin with your graudpurents lu their lu- fancy. It Is very clear that tho man who hadn't a word to say wasn't a woman. It Is Just ns bard to encourage somo men as It Is to discourage others. I'lio reason why some people cim't win Is because others don't lose. SALES AGENTS WANTED 530.OO per week or 400 uer cant nro nroicst against theso Mail arrives at St. Johus nt 7:10 a.m. fit. All samples, stationery, and art When in Alabama 13 Mail Schedule worked, nud took her four children or 10 rou mom or tneir livos. are other pluces than Sanb'rancisco with her. Sho says, "I havo boon Tho high tompornturo of tho mills that need an awakening, but we la 1110 milt Biiico 1 was rour years eomuineu with nn abnormal humidity ,,0r-11 w,1 ' e none with tin old. I am now thlrty-four." suo if the nlr producod by steaming aacan"(ll'ae' looked to mo ns If sho was sixty, iiiono by mnuufneturora uinkos bad Sho had a kindly nnturo if treated niatorlal weave easier and tonds to right, but hor wholo nro nnu uo wurnors- power of ro- in order to nsure a channe of -.h. spirit was crushed out benoath tho listing disease. Tho atmosphere pro- vertlsement the copy for such change wheols of Comer's greed. ..hen you motes prespiratlon, but makes ovnp. v",u r"c" '"I1 ?' lce no later thnn II1UIIIUI UllllfeO IUIIII Ull VHII VU .M I " -W.......W,, ,v U.V,MIUI society Is cursed with an abnormal when ho loaves tho mill, has to face human being. Sho know nothing but a much reduced tompernturo which whiz of tho machinery In tho factory, produces sorlous chest affections. As I tnlkod to hor with many others Thoy nro all narrow-chested, thin, sho said; "O can you do somothlng dishonrtencd looking, ror liar Tno wives, mowers ami 1 round vorv fow of them who and tho children nil go In to produce couid toad or wrlu ns I vent to take dividends, profit, profit, profit, this their names to regl 1 or It for their brutal governor Is n pillar of tno charter. I found tho would como First Methodist church In Illrinlng- and ask mo "you w-lto his or her ham, On Sundny ho gots up and name" whoover they toted for. No elngs "O Lord will you havo nnothor wonder tho governor could send his star for my crown whon I get thoro; daughter to tho sea i horo. no won What n Job God muBt havo hiring dor ho could havo the audacity to mechanics to mnko stars for that dnvo minors back at the point of tho black-hearted villain's crowu "whon bayonet. No wonder men and women ho gets there." 1 saw tho llttlo ones commit sulcldo. They are too tired lying on tho bed slinking with cuius out nt tho end of tho day to engngo and l couiu near mem usk purum m any montni pursuit. Thoy want nnd musters, what they wero horo something or somo one to cheer for; what crlmo thoy woro brought them up hero nud sold to tho dividend- nuc tloueer. Men and womon of America, whon will you stop your hypociltlcal ac lions and rlso up In your might to 30, Nov. 6 ami 17, 1908, Plant an ad. in The St. Johns Review and CHURCH NOTICES. ILinfU nlitirrliTnlin IlrMlizcIll. Pt. . f . . w 11 i.ih u 1 tiiiiirit criuuii fir wi m . in. 1 icoluius H .tee g I at 8 i). m. lor. Kuiiiluv Kohool io a. ill.! prrc ai u a, 111, ana a p. uu Jijiwunw Holy Crosa Cntnollc cnurcii, ttrntfrtn Kmc n til.. nV tUHHl lOIIS fc i.i.-t. .. ... ..luiiAPi 11 nn wart nit-Mi iiiui: 11. nil. iv v .11 .1.. .i, 111 1 UUCniULIC U9 lUIIW" . . MUUIHb IV. .J. JUll lll, 1 Y I PUmI Usk at. Andrew s t-.pitoMi v,.i-m Traoc Marks DCSIC.N3 1ai?n.aiJf.'k5'J!'."d.'!.f lent free. 01, uif. leutt qalcklr ureruu, our opinion fr wLoilii Itnendon Probbl7PHtfnlal,li i S ma lloniiir cl conniii,if,.i lutinonni? . .... snt fr.a. If)....t ..7.. TUI lutkt, wlihout ct.ree, in the " Scientific fltiici imii. A hndiomelr IlluilriKvJ weeklr. Iracit clr. La. BnocbOa Pointers for our Patrons. ami ins P. m. Leaves at 10:20 a. m., nud 4:45 p. 111. Ollice open week days from 6:.5 n. m, to 6:10 p, in, Sundays from 9 to 10 a, m We do not allow any printer ot conditions? Pt out nicer work than we do and I . . ia er. Ol.n 4A.I. I. .A yours ago "c lJUl l"c ucl oiuvr into our joos to flvo The .,lln.,... II? .. I .1 ... , fl..rt I fll. .,-rf I . iiinub"u iii-u. ii o wiuii one periuau- meo wuiuuu run uum iuui .u u.u i nc iiiuereiicc oeiween poor out ngent In this locality for tho looms. Today I find thorn runnlug stock and first class stock on a job largest picture and frntno houso In bomo -I looms, nnd when you think is a small item when vou consider morIcn. Kxiierlencu lilinon.ssnrv. nf thn l.lirh tentlon. whon you think tlif vnlni- nf tiio inl Tt ic l... I Ol T 1 --. . ... i"l 1 I " - I - " . I ' w" Jw"- . M I 01. juiuib rciry 1 line varci. vo Instruct you how to sell our of tho cruelty to their nerves, you price of a satisfied customer. It is goods nud furrnlsh tho capital. If nay know why tho glory of their better to make so cents less on n lives Is gono. Tho days when their job and have a customer who will labor was not a burden are gono; come back, than to use the flimsv now it Is all a hot rush and worry stock, make the extra 50 cents and and Incessant swoat. Thoy scratch lose your customer. That is the their bits of corn out of these hard way we figure tt, Leave Kast .Side (A. M. 16:30, 7:10, you want a permanent, honorable am 8:00,9:00, 10:00, 1 1:00,12:00 M. r.M. profitable position, wrlto us tn dnv liu&'-so;7iis, ,?r TTxz .cuttt,OBU0 aml 8an,pl0 8:30, 9:30, 10:30, 11:30. 1 Jl.ia:3o, I' rank W, Williams Company, UU 1:30, 2:30, 3:30, 4:30, 5:10, 0:00, 0:30, 1 .v. rayior ai., unicago, ill, ..li lb Uw. Win. K. chunlaln. Uegular services jryo P-f; Sunday school nt 3 p. m.J I'M.6."".'; in.; Lcuton services every l'nday uy a.m. . .fc I'.vaujjelicnl churcli-biuiiwy rj. lu 11, 111, i-rciwuwji ' n if. I,. C, li. 3:30 p. m.; Senior K. U V, 7 p, m, l'reacliing at o p. Oates, pastor, . , , tfl I'Irst Congregational Churcb-G. v.-.i .?... C.....19V school W i-iL-iMiu, lwsiui. ""'"', " .., in. j preacliing 11 a. m. and 7- JV Y. 1'. S. C. K. meeting at 7 P- w' fTJ meet nir Thursday at 7:30 P- w , ... 1 . 11 mm welcome iu uu. . u liniui piuiri-ii. University Tars. V I filed nfal.i.t sou In tin- nhnv itefular (WT" ?SMVtl5 .Very'Sumlay inning German Haptlst cuurcn- grow. SUAIAIONS. ,STi!i.??iiJ.95?.V"I.9' TIIH STATU 01' "jy 15. twou, mintill .... r.V; SUMMONS, Co 36.8, NeW ynrf( AT:su.ae,.,,ive M lle('eildant nunc name 01 the Kate ol 0,cEoii y Si,ri4.Hy to apprai and an.wer ll. ou are I .e com- I court ol the rrluay tliejuUda r a dc . i;i;r;rr;r;,' v " ii" ,""i rcllcl at tu the couit may wtm eoultaule. 1 1 ni kuin ucr ol the . niv, rmuvu... I German Lutherau-Servicei 1 s 1JJ wie couit may wtm equitable. iim. iV ".".' "' o r- lln.l.lKr. ivistnr. above i.a..,c.rconriVn f"" ' .1 '!e im'i i ' cauu. mi M,. .mi. .L.. 7 .: ' ri wi " min I a. in. every Sunday worn ng V", Peninsula avenue and K''TJ. University I'ark. All Cerm"M $ Inlinu i-nriliallv Invited tO alW?- Johns cordially luv iMftnSp&nce Society W caukc on the jotli ilay ol Sci.tirmi.er. innX .i iV-h 1...1.1 v ni.l.... UnnniiuC hOU, urutr iinw-ri ti.i ' iiciu ur wiiivuku - . in the"' I oT,,:.';." ."""uo''!.ueluli" ,1..vfi ..,,,1 Wednesdays at a p. . 1. . . ----.. UIIIC cacn . MK IWfl " - The Yrt ,Vni.ii "mlfx tonccutlve week. thereof will .'C " ,. 'c.,a" 'O'M .. . r...lnd. ijS. " ...v .j .. uay 01 iMoveiuoer, Union JJepo'i .u" o.atJ, 4M No. a TIME TABLE 0. R-N. tti rvrf Portland UUIUU Q..ji l,l Chicago StH.-cial leaves 80J - No. 4 Spokane Flyer leave, m '7Z., No. 6 Wansas City Kxp. I fl I ' y . fi n .JirAl II. 12. Cl.I.I II.'K. Attorney lor l'lalutlfl, Wanted. 1 li Ic nfc '"MNo. s Kansas U(y oF-" "rw W T- '""I -ww" " "