PAGE A8, KEIZERTIMES, NOVEMBER 19, 2021
Red Notice makes for a serviceable popcorn movie
BY T.J REID
For the Keizertimes
There once was a young algorithm
named Albert who lived in the magical
land of Tinseltown. Albert the algorithm
had but one dream in his life, a dream that
he held close and cherished even when
the other algorithms belittled and mocked
him: To one day write a movie script
based on an EW “Top 10 Hottest Stars in
Hollywood” list that he had found in the
checkout aisle of his local Rite Aid. The
studios Albert approached sneered and
snickered at him, until one day his worth
was seen at last by a benevolent stream-
ing giant who offered him $200 million to
make his dream come true at last.
This is not the story behind
Netflix’s Red Notice, but it very well could
have been.
Ryan Reynolds stars as an art thief guy
who wants to steal some golden egg thing.
Dwayne Johnson also stars as an FBI man
who wants to stop Ryan Reynolds from
stealing the golden egg thing. They even-
tually have to team up against Gal Gadot,
who also stars as a different thief who also
wants to steal the golden egg thing. Banter
and action ensue.
One of the problems is that none of
these three actors is particularly well
known for their actual acting. Do I like all
three of them? Yes. Do they all ooze cha-
risma and charm at obscenely high levels?
Also yes. But when the biggest selling
point of your movie is “Ryan Reynolds
acts like Ryan Reynolds in the direction
of Dwayne Johnson who acts like Dwayne
Johnson while Gal Gadot looks attractive
in a red dress,” you might have a problem.
At no point does it ever feel like you are
Review
watching actual characters in Red Notice,
which in turn reminds you that you are
watching what is essentially the brain-
storming sessions of cynical Netflix exec-
utives who, like Albert, only have one goal:
to drum up some extra views and sub-
scribers by utilizing elements that have
worked well in the past.
Acting isn’t everything, of course, and
the other parts of Red Notice are service-
able enough. The plot really is as dumb
and silly as I described above, but not
really any more so than any other dumb
and silly action movies that you watch
with your brain turned off and your hand
in a popcorn bucket (you know the ones…
they are written by Albert’s friends). The
action ranges from decent to pretty cool,
if nothing special (the climatic under-
ground chase scene is the clear standout),
and the Ryan Reynolds-delivered quips
land a good 70% of the time (although the
other 30% might make you cringe with
their forced crassness and general imma-
turity). There are certainly worse buddy/
action movies out there, but there are also
a good deal of better ones. Life being finite
and all, you would probably be better off
searching for one of the latter.
Or you can watch Red Notice on Netflix
and support Albert the algorithm’s career.
Do it for him. For Albert.
Red Notice is now available on Netflix.
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