World’s Richest Man Returns to Boyhood School
Aft**r «II, ■ prlaon I* not mnlniaiiiml
aa a place of reel, raclent loo «m l is
cuperuflnu.
Who c«n remember Ilia olii foahloned
«lude, o f whom II wua «alti, "kivery
Mim« a picture?*'
When
Babies
Natura la alili lrlimi|ilianl. No irlri
look« na weirdly lank In pereou aa la
tba faalilon picture«.
Tha I i I kki ' i I fourfluelier armimi loivn
olii Ima II take* two o f ilio new amali
aliai! l'llla |o llalli a rigar.
Hark boma when you wanlail ana
pendere, jrnu Junl walked Into a alora
amt aakril for “ auppeitdera."
A customer nunt Into the grocer*«
and found biro chuckling lie rtlly, al
though no on* was In sight.
: “ What's the Joker* he asked.
“ Ho, b o !" I Juat got even with my
barber,“ and be slapped bis hands to­
gether.
"H ow** t h s t r
“ H e came In for s loaf of bread and
1 named over everything In the stort
before I'd get It for him.“
Wa Aniarlrana look U|>on Iha orlan
lata with pity anil they gaia on ua
with ronlampl, anil ao lionora ara «van.
“ A western girl baa m ail« ■ faab
km ahl« ilraaa out o f shavings from tha
sawm ill." K r—and about Ilia apllnl-
•r a t
“ Swiss cheese nota ylolillng lo artan-
tlata," aaya a haaitllna.
Wa never
know anyona « I « « to gal Iha hallar
o f It
Orarhaard on tha hue:
I Id you |
||#nry y or(j |,a(i tha little old school where he learned Iha "th ree Ila" removed to Dearborn. Mich.. and the oilier
«pend tha usual two weak« vacation
t,a officiated at It* reopening, aaalalad by bla boyhood aeatinala. Dr. Bdaai Kuddlman. and hla eon, Kdaal
at home?
Uh huh—a vary uiual
y or)1 >n,8 niualratlno abowa the school house and Ita pupil«, and Mr. Ford eeated among Iha children,
tw o week«.1*
New Plane Designed for Transatlantic Flight
An Interesting sight wa haven't en­
countered In IB yea r« at least la a
runaway team bllrbad to a water­
melon wagon.
C i i I h Hairdressing
T h e Owner o f the Boodle— Tee. N a­
poleon Is a nice little dog. I don't
wonder that yon admire him.
T Ii* Owner o f the Airedale— It Isn't
that, but I'm Just dying to know
w ber* you got that lovely permanent
w avs fo r him.
I want U> have my
dog don* tbe tam e way.
A GOOD MECHANIC
"W h y do you buy mora ahora, al this
tImeT Tou have II pairs In tha clos­
e t “ “ I know, but I need the b oi tor
• picnic lunch.“
A view o f the new and specially designed two-motored tandem monoplane which wag tested St Roosevelt
Held, l.ong Island, In preparation for a proposed flight from N ew York to Bucharest, Rumania. The plane Is said
to he nonstallahle, and a tricycle lundlng gear prevents noseovera.
TO IRRIGATE DESERT
Maj. John Coolidge and His Bride
Bose— Why do you .Idnk you'll make
a good auto mechanic?
Applicant— Well. I know one of tbe
secrets o f t i t business Is, while you'rt
making repairs always see that some­
thing else gets broke.
“T h e fall bat will be lighter this
year than last." says « well known
authority on male styles. It should,
I f tha dry rlraner know a his business.
Mechanical Endurance
Tha old typew riter*# good and iuogh.
And If It w ere not eo.
I t couldn't stand h alf o f the stuff
F or lite ra ry show
Sound A d vice
“ Now, air." said the ambitious young
man whose parents bad brought him
np In the food belief that be could
sing, “ you have tried my voice.
I
want you to tell me Just wbat It ts
beat adapted to.”
And. without a moment’s hesitation,
the singing master rep lied : "W hisper­
ing."
In view o f our Inability to do any­
thing shout the weather, perhaps the
oext best thing ts to do something to
the chump who's always reminding us
o f It.
W e wouldn't cull the nniue o f Sal­
mon P. O tase a household word ex­
actly. And certainly we wouldn't call
his face on tba new tio.uuu bill a
household faco.
SUFFERING ELIMINATED
lS-years success m treating Rectal and
Colon troubles oy the Dr C J Dean
WON-aUWCICAi isethna •*-
aMss us to give WRITTEN AS­
SI IRANCK ot f t l . M KIJMh
NA ntO ar IKE MKFUNIkEI*.
Send toüsv lor EVER
nook deecrthlna c iu m and nmm
100-rsae
Lw
leaalmem
t4 tm e h
.Omenti,
¿N CLINIC
ft'
T im
-------
V» H "
■TT,"I
A ll Set N ew
First Housewife— I haven't
Mrs. Binks shopping lately.
Second
Delicatessen
Patroness—
Haven't yon heard?
H er husband
bought a drag store.— American L e ­
gion Monthly.
l b Identify Genuine Aspirin
H E Increasing nse o f B ayer A spirin every year is proof
that it has no ill effects. I t is the accepted antidote fo r
pain. It alw ays helps; it never harms. Quick relief when
you've a headache, or cold; or are suffering from neu­
ra lgia or neuritis. Bheumatic pains yield, too, if y o u 'll
only give these tablets a chance. But you w ant genuine
A spirin, so look fo r tha B ayer Croae on every tablet
The box always bears the name Bayer and the word
' 'gen u in e'' printed in red. Proven directions inald*.
T
MOBOeeetieecidestir
Crossed Atlantic in Little Ketch
T*r
Stock o f tha Cincinnati National
«a g u e baseball club, o f >50 par value,
arhlcb recently Jumped from >80 to
M i l a shure a fter It wns rumored
lack Hendrick* might be replaced aa
'.be Reds' manager, reached a record
nigh at >210 when lleudrlcks tendered
nil resignation.
C ordi and Chords
Dome Ethel Smyth, famous com­
poser and conductor. Is noted for her
ready wit.
On one occasion she wns giving an
afternoon lecture to a distinguished
put boring anti, being troubled with
the sun's rays falling Just across her
line o f vision, she asked a male col­
league scaled beside her on the plat­
form. nnd who, like herself, was en
tilled to add “ Mun. Doc." to his name
to lower the wtndowshndo.
In his endeavor to do so he had
much difficulty with the cord, and,
as he continued to struggle with It.
Dame
Ethel
smilingly
rem arked:
“ Strange that a doctor o f music should
ba unable to manage a common cord.“
Differences In Steel
T h e bureau o f standards says that
fhe difference between etalnlese Iron
end stainless steel Is mainly a dlfTer-
ence In carbon content.
Stainless
Iron has prncttrally no carboa
Nat Muck H elp
Bill Trace says he's mlgldy glnd so
tnnny folks are wlshln' him luck In
cleanin' out all those frogs he found
In hie well recently. “ It's right nice '
said Bill s chucklin' “ to have «o man»
It wish""«
Kona ao ' I In- ' 1»
ot Bayer Manufacture ot
ot BaUcyUcactd
m
Immediately after the wedding o f Maj. John Coolidge. son o f former
President and Mrs. Coolidge, and Florence Trumbull, dnughter o f the gov­
ernor o f Connecticut, In Plnlnvllle, Conn., the bride and groom obligingly
posed for the news photographer», with the above result. The young couple
then departed for n b rief honeymoon trip somewhere In New Euglund, trav­
eling mostly by automobile.
An eminent dermatologist says w id e
hcr.» grow Jus! aa fast In cold weather
aa In hot. Thla no doubt account! for
the many long beards among Kaki mo*.
T h e aclentlflc preparation paradt-
rhlorohenxlne la sab' to Ire very de­
al m otive to moths. A goral plan la to
w rite the ninne on a piece o f pn|ier
nnd place II In your pocket; then the
moth will see It anil luugli hlmeelS
to death.
Condition Unchanged
Mrs. Tester— Before we were mar­
ried you said you were unworthy to
lace my shoe«, and now I'm giving yon
the chance to do It *Dd yon refuse.
H er Husband— Just so. Well, I still
feel unworthy.
Aspirin la the trade mark
REDS’ STOCK JUMPS
Heard on the bus: “ T h e other night
our favorite w ife accuser) the Toung
Hopeful o f using some o f her new
sun tan powder, hut Investigation de­
veloped that he had truly failed to
wash Ills neck."
"W hat la womnn’a placeT" aaka a
correspondent. Aa a result of extend
ed observation, we are able to Inform
him that It la any plnre alia hnppcns
to he In, while she's there.
S H O E P O L IS H
DOES THE TH IN KIN G
Arthur P. Davis, form erly head of
he United Stntes reclamation service,
alio has been designated hy the Soviet
jovernment o f Russia to supervise the
ftgantlc >250,000,000 desert Irrigation
1 >rojoct In Ituaalnn Turkestan, where
dussln expects to grow cotton.
Considering the manner In which
the reducing fad liua swept through
women'* word robes, father wonder*
how mother and the girls still mnnnge
to require so much luggage for vaca­
tion tours.
A polle« force I d South America hai
nlpi>ed a plot to Injure the United
Ht a tea. That's more tiran some police
forcea In the United States are doing
D y a n S h i N E
W hat E very Person K now «
“ Yea." said the baseball manager,
’ I f rain stops the game we g lv « pain
checks that entitle tbe holder to conte
i back to see another game free.“
“ That Isn't necessary for ua to do,"
| sighed the preacher. “ I f It even look»
; lik e rain people stay away from
church."
Another thing we have always felt
to be wildly elaggerated Is the Import (
lance o f the matter marked In •
"M arked C opy." after It arrives.
A Chicagoan, robbed o f hla suit o f
clothe« by footpads, dashed Into ao
alley and wrapped hlmaelf with a
sport extra. This Is a way, o f coursa
o f gellin g Into tha papers.
T h rifty
He— I threw m yself away when 1
married you.
She— Well, I never knew you to
throw awuy anything that was worth
anything.— Vancouver P rovinca
B A R T O N ’S
What proflteth a man to break out
o f a New York prison, where ha has
been seeing Broadway shows for noth
Ing. and pay >11 fo r a sentí
Perhaps tha most puxxllng thing
shout Tibet, called the l-und o f Mys­
tery In a new book title, la how each
new explorer who manages to get Into
the place Is the first.
the thing to give. It is almost
certain to clear up any minor
ailment, and could by no possi­
bility do the youngest child the
slightest harm. So it’s the first
thing to think o f when a child has
a coated tongue ; won't play, can’t
sleep, is fretfu l or out o f sorts.
Get the genuine; it always has
Chas. H . Fletcher’s signature on
the package.
A t the touch o f the dauber «cuff* disappear, color
is reatcrcd uniformly to faded ihoca. More than yo
long-hfe thine»— to cent*. Colon for black, brown,
tan and w ho« ahoea— a neutral polish for other a.
i'oaslbly the moat notable Instance
e f good Judgment during the heated
term baa been the Swedish Byers' In
ahlllly to get out o f Iceland.
t
F all * f M a «
ffeventeen boy» look thè con rie In
eooking In a Buffato high school. Must
o f os learn to get breakfast after
we'ra married.— Morrlstown Jersey-
man.
recipe o f the week calls for can­
cerróla, on tha theory, perhaps,
Iha bitterest pill ran ha swallow ad
Is sugar-coaled.
One who lives In s “ house by the
«Ida o f Ibe m ad“ these days Is likely
to find Iha deep tracks o f strange au­
tomobiles In his front lawn.
w H
Babies w ill cry, often for no
apparent reason. Y ou may not
know what’s wrong, but you .can
always g ive Csstoria. This soon
has your little one com forted; i f
not. you should call a doctor.
D on’t experiment with medicine*
intended for the stronger systems
o f adults! M ost o f those little
upsets are soon soothed away by
a little o f this pleasant-tasting,
gentle-acting children's remedy
that children like.
I t may be the stomach, or may
be the little bowels. O r in the case
o f older children, a sluggish, con­
stipated condition. Castoria is still
I School-day scuffs
I vanish with a touch—
It la saddening 10 think that In a
little while we shall begin to misa Iha
old fashioned dollar bills, and tha new
smaller ones, to a
A
dled
that
I f It
CRY
“ 1 And you every Job you v* bad
and now your out o f work ngaln.”
“ Now, that's an Idea, d e a r! Why
couldn't you open up an employment
agency?"
Regulating tbe Skyway
T h e aviato r h u rryln * by
Is warned to Go or Stop;
And every cloud In yonder sky
W ill need a Trefltc Cop.
Astronom ical Phenomenon
H e (dream ily) — Would that I were
a star In yon heavens.
She ( I d l y ) — I ’d rather you were *
com et
"W h y ?"
“ Then you’d come round only one#
every fifty .rears"
Thinking Up Something
Fie— W ell, If you won't marry me,
I shall go and—
She— Go and what?
He— Don't rush a fellow. I haven't
decided y e t
When They Change
“ Women always say they are young
er than they are."
“ Not always. I promised my fiancee
a necklace with a pearl for every year
o f her life and she said sh*- wus live
years older thno she w h s " — Madrid
Buen Humor
Dudley N. Schoales, Jr., Joseph Runimler and Carl L. Weagant. all
students nt Cornell university, pictured In their forty-six-foot ketch Carlssrk
on their arrival at Cannes, France, the end o f their perilous voyage across
the Atlantic ocean.
THINGS YOU MAY NOT KNOW
Police women are employed In 218
American cities.
It Is estimated that there are +4,000
thunderstorms occurring dally on the
earth.
Belgium, with a territory o f 11.872
square mile#, has passed the 8,000,000
mark In population.
A study o f the Chlppewns shows
that the average fam ily among Indians
'm l <!"•! i : !> r.vo nr l':r. • el.lid oa.
T here are 483 known volcanoes In
the world.
The average American automobile
owner paid >16.53 In gasoline tax Inst
year, statistics show.
The population o f the United States
Increases at the rate o f about 1.600.-
000 persons a year.
The Ottawa river, In Its upper
course north o f Pembroke, Canada
Is "Id to h-> over 3,0 '• f c| ill**';».
The Foundation
“ Has young Jones any gift for
painting?"
“ Yea, a sailor friend gave him a
lot o f old canvas."— Pathfinder Maga­
zine.
Education
Visitor— I hear you’ve lost your par
rot that used to swear ao terribly.
Host— Yes, died o f shock.
Visitor— Really, how did !: happen?
Host— He escu(>ed from hi* cage and
wandered on to the g o lf llnka
Candid
Waggish
t*lner
(w ith menu) —
Chicken croquettes, e h ) I sny. waiter
what part o f a chicken Is the cro­
q u ette'
W alter T i e nert ••■ofe ie f‘ m e
froM I !:
d ! \ Is , II,-|- • u
L ik e Rattlesnake Meat
Is rattlesnake meat good to eat? O f
course the uninitiated will at once an­
swer In the negative, says the Path­
finder Magazine. But not ao with the
fa ir students o f the nature study camp
o f the Pennsylvania State college sum­
m er session.
Some 200 stndents at tbe camp In
the valley o f the Seven Sisters moun­
tains sampled fried rattlesnake and
all declare “ It tastes Just like chicken
or frogs' legs, and once yon try It
you're sure to come back for more."
Reason Enough
“ N ow why on earth must we go to
Afghanistan?”
“ Grandma wants aome afghans."
Sound Accnratoly Recorded
Transmission o f light beams, through
a fabric film upon which positive
sound Images are recorded, hat re­
sulted, the Inventor o f the process
aaya. In the reproduction o f sound*
without distortion. Projecting the light
through the fabric medium for tbe
purpose o f translating sound Images
Into musical or vocal sounds may be
conducted either with or without mo­
tion pictures, says Popular Mechanics
Magazine.
M ore Camouflage
Mother— W illie, I told you to wash
your neck clean.
W illie — W ell, mother, ain’t 1 going
to wear a collar?
Here’s one granddaughter
who takes advice from elders
Schoolgirl learns
simple health
measure
\ \ 77TH all the talk there is now-
V V ad ays about the independence
o f the tub-deb generation, your re­
porter got a great kick out o f hear­
ing a grandmother describe how her
granddaughter wa* follow ing a good
old tried and true method o f improv­
in g her general health.
“ M y granddaughter, Margaret,"aaya
Mrs. Z ell o f 6231 Catherine Street,
Philadelphia, “ read about N ujol,
was interested in it, ao sent for a
»ample.’ ' It seems ahe ha» been tak­
ing a tablespoon o f Nujol once a day
since and expects to continue this
treatment. Already she has found an
improvement in her general health,
her s y ite m fu n c tio n in g normally
where other remedies had failed.
T h at’ » one o f the best things about
N u jol. It is just ai harmless for
young girls, or babies even, as it is
for adults. For N ujol contains no
"tdicines or drug'. It can’t v s e t
Starting right
you because it works t o easily and
regularly, in a normal fashion.
N u jol wss perfected by the Nujol
Laboratories, 2 Park Avenue, N ew
York City. It can be bought any­
where for about tbe price o f a ticket
to a good movie. G et a bottle of
Nujol today and try it, w o n 't you?
In se?.!?d r-cLc-es.