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If it doesn't fit rigHt, it's because it isn't
made riHt. Try the "Sximmitt" shirts at
9
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and end your sKirt troubles
We undersell regular Stores.
IN LIGHTER VEIN
The visitor to New York was in.search
of information.
"Do you know anything about the
copper corner?" he asked his host.
"No," was the reply, "but I know the
corner copper." Philadelphia Public
Ledger. ' ; ';.;, ; . ,
"What a misfortune it is that the
public encourages so much trashy liter
ature!" remarked the man with black
rimmed eyeglasses.
"It isn't a misfortune," answered the
practical person. "It is a blessing. It
enables people whose books won't sell to
imagine they have written classics."
Washington Star. '
"I'm going to make a lot of money
writing books, and then I'm going to
farm."
"Why nnt make a lot of money farm
ing and then write lxh s." Philadel
phia Pivss.
s- .
When a man is sure he has a woman's
sympathy he adds fully a hundred, per
cent to his hard-luck stories. -Ex.
WANTED. : :
A pair of suspenders for the breeches
of promise.
A barber to shave the-face of the earth.
A dentist to work on the jaws of death.
Sea horses to feed from the troughs of
the sea.
' A few seeds from the flower of speech.
A pen that will write with inky dark
ness. ' '
A pair of corsets for the waste of time.
Mr. Ja whack Did any brainless idiot
ever propose to you before I married
you? : ; ..
Mrs. Jawback Yes.
Mr. Jaw back Well, why in the thun
der didn't you marry him?
Mrs. Jawback I did. Ex.
; We need several hundred subscribers.
Now is the time to subscribe. Twenty
five Cents for one year's subscription.
Address, The Chemawa American,
Chemawa, Ore.
In this country a man who can eat
more than he can earn ought to starve.
A man excuses 'meanness,, in himself,
but how he despises it in others.