FREE WILL
ASTROLOGY
BY R O B B R E Z N Y
ARIES (March 21-April 19): Don’t just be smart and articulate, Aries. Dare to be wildly wise and prone to unruly
observations. Don’t merely be kind and well-behaved. Explore the mysteries of healing through benevolent
mischief. Don’t buy into the all-too-serious trances. Break up the monotony with your unpredictable play and
funny curiosity. Don’t simply go along with the stories everyone seems to believe in as if they were the Truth and
the Way. Question every assumption; rebel against every foregone conclusion; propose amusing plot twists that
send the narratives off on interesting tangents.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Breve orazione penetra is an old Italian idiom. Its literal translation is “short
prayers pierce” or “concise prayers penetrate.” You can extrapolate from that to come up with the meaning
that “God listens best to brief prayers.” In the coming week, I invite you to apply this idea whenever you ask for
anything, whether you are seeking the favors of the Divine Wow or the help of human beings. Know exactly what
you want, and express it with no-nonsense succinctness.
GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Every February you go through a phase when it’s easier to see the big picture of
your life. If you take advantage of this invitation, your experience is like being on a mountaintop and gazing into
the vastness. Every August, on the other hand, you are more likely to see the details you have been missing.
Transformations that have been too small and subtle to notice may become visible to you. If you capitalize on
this opportunity, the experience is like peering through a microscope. Here’s a third variation, Gemini: Around the
full moons of both February and August, you may be able to alternately peer into the microscope and simulate
the view from a mountaintop. I think that’s about to happen.
CANCER (June 21-July 22): You wouldn’t sip dirty water from a golden chalice. Am I right? Nor would you
swig delicious poison from a fine crystal wine glass or 10-year-old vinegar from a queen’s goblet. I’m sure you
will agree that you’d much rather drink a magical elixir from a paper cup, or a rejuvenating tonic from a chipped
coffee mug, or tasty medicine out of a kids’ plastic soup bowl you bought at the thrift store. Don’t you dare lie to
yourself about what’s best for you.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Every 12 years, the planet Jupiter spends about a year cruising through the sign of Leo.
It’s there with you now, and will be with you through early August 2015. What can you expect? EXPANSION! That’s
great, right? Yes and no. You might love to have some parts of your life expand; others, not so much. So I suggest
you write down your intentions. Say something like this: “I want Jupiter to help me expand my faith in myself,
my power to do what I love, and my ability to draw on the resources and allies I need. Meanwhile, I will prune my
desires for things I don’t really need and cut back on my involvement with things that don’t inspire me. I don’t
want those to expand.”
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): TV comedian Stephen Colbert confesses that his safeword is “pumpkin patch.” Does
that mean he participates in actual BDSM rituals? Is it the codeword he utters when he doesn’t want the intensity
to rise any further, when he doesn’t want his next boundary crossed? I don’t know. Perhaps he’s simply joking or
speaking metaphorically. Whether or not you engage in literal BDSM, Virgo, there’s an aspect of your life right now
that has metaphorical resemblances to it. And I suggest that you do the equivalent of using your safeword very
soon. Nothing more can be gained from remaining embroiled in your predicament. Even if the ordeal has been
interesting or educational up until now, it won’t be for much longer. Escape your bondage.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): If you’re planning to hurl a thunderbolt, make sure you are all warmed up and at full
strength before you actually unleash it. It would be sad if you flung a half-assed thunderbolt that looked like a
few fireflies and sounded like a cooing dove. And please don’t interpret my wise-guy tone here as a sign that I’m
just kidding around. No, Libra. This is serious stuff. Life is offering you opportunities to make a major impression,
and I want you to be as big and forceful and wild as you need to be. Don’t tamp down your energy out of fear of
hurting people’s feelings. Access your inner sky god or sky goddess, and have too much fun expressing your raw
power.
I Saw You
I T ’ S F R E E T O P L AC E A N I S AW YO U ! E M A I L : I S AW YO U @ E U G E N E W E E K LY.C O M
I S AW YOU
SUNFLOWER SMILE
Beautiful brown woman, sunflower chest...I
saw your big smile and sad eyes.just want-
ed you to know you took my breath away...
your beauty and your patchouli.I wanna
hold your hand. When: Sunday, July 27,
2014. Where: downtown eugene/ the kiva.
You: Woman. Me: Man. #903423
2 PRINCES
This one would like to buy you flowers. You
look good in my shirt When: Wednesday,
August 1, 2012. Where: whitiker block
party. You: Woman. Me: Man. #903422
THE LAST GOODBYE....
blindgirl..we never said goodbye..we parted
as renewed friends..the girl became a
woman..that I still wanted to marry..I wait to
say..hello can I help you again.. When:
Monday, July 28, 2014. Where: my 1st
words to her....is our last WINK..... You:
Woman. Me: Man. #903421
HEATHER @ COUNTRYFAIR
RING & WATCH....
SHINY HAPPY PEOPLE
blingirl..you wear my ring & I your watch..as
a symbol for timeless friends..my 1st best
friend..the girl I gave my mind too..my heart
& soul.. When: Friday, July 25, 2014.
Where: unending good thoughts WINK......
You: Woman. Me: Man. #903419
When it was sunny and warm last Friday,
every where I looked I saw smiling faces.
Kids on shoulders. People playing with their
dogs. Beer mugs clinking. The sun brings
out the best in us--so why are you still being
a curmudgeon... cheers to the changing of
the seasons! When: Last Friday. Where:
Eugene You: People of Eugene Me: Your
Biggest Flan
MISTER WILSON
PICK UP YOUR RECEIVER
Hey Lizard Lips, I see you’re still pushing
your character assasination on that guy
you call Weasel. Can’t you devise a better
strategy? You look desperate. Why don’t
you just concede?
NINKASI GUIDE
I hope we meet again. I had fun with you.
Hoping you felt the same.
URGENT:
Witness please come forward if you saw an
Oregon Taxi #99 at Starbucks on Pearl St,
07/03 10am hour, in which trunk/bike rack
on my head, me falling to Street. Please call
Christine: 541-515-1601. E: hutchhaven@
yahoo.com
You appeared next to me near the hippie
hatchery on Sunday afternoon. We talked
about our passion for creating metal and
leather art. I would love to continue our
walk. When: Sunday, July 13, 2014. Where:
Country Fair. You: Woman. Me: Man.
#903420
Totally Tubular Tuesday !
#eugeneor #totallytubulartuesday
#ewexposure
CONTRIBUTE ON INSTAGRAM
BY TAGGING YOUR PHOTOS WITH
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Your ethical code may soon be tested. What will you do if you see a chance
to get away with a minor sin or petty crime that no one will ever find out about? What if you are tempted to lie or
cheat or deceive in ways that advance your good intentions and only hurt other people a little bit or not at all?
I’m not here to tell you what to do, but rather to suggest that you be honest with yourself about what’s really at
stake. Even if you escape punishment for a lapse, you might nevertheless inflict a wound on your integrity that
would taint your relationship with your own creativity. Contemplate the pleasures of purity and righteousness,
and use them to enhance your power.
#ewexposure
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PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): If you go to an American doctor to be treated for an ailment, odds are that he or
she will interrupt you no more than 14 seconds into your description of what’s wrong. But you must not tolerate
this kind of disrespect in the coming days, Pisces — not from doctors, not from anyone. You simply must request
or, if necessary, demand the receptivity you deserve. If and when it’s given, I urge you to speak your truth in its
entirety. Express what has been hidden and suppressed. And this is very important: Take responsibility for your
own role in any problems you discuss.
*A PLEASANT SURPRISE*
Sensuality? Foot Fetish? Soft skin, great
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Awaiting your call. 541-870-6127 Tia.
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by: @sassyging28
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Lake Superior State University issues a “Unicorn Questing Privilege” to those
people who are interested in hunting for unicorns. Are you one of them? I wouldn’t be surprised if you felt an urge
like that in the coming weeks. Unusual yearnings will be welling up in you. Exotic fantasies may replace your
habitual daydreams. Certain possibilities you have considered to be unthinkable or unattainable may begin to
seem feasible. Questions you have been too timid to ask could become crucial for you to entertain. (You can get
your Unicorn Questing License here: http://tinyurl.com/unicornlicense.)
suggest you’ll be wise to muse on that advice in the coming weeks. How should you interpret it? I’ll leave you
to draw your own conclusions, of course, but here are a few hints. It may be that beauty needs protection, or at
least buffering. It’s possible that you can’t simply depend on your sincerity and good intentions, but also need
to infuse some ferocity into your efforts. In order for soft, fragile, lovely things to do what they do best, they may
require the assistance of tough, strong, hearty allies.
D AT I N G S E R V I C E
a photo sharing space
SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): In your dreams you may travel to Stockholm to accept the Nobel Prize or to
Hollywood to pick up your Oscar. There’s a decent chance that in your sleepy-time adventures you will finally
score with the hot babe who rejected you back in high school, or return to the scene of your biggest mistake
and do things right this time. I wouldn’t be surprised if in one dream you find yourself riding in a gold chariot
during a parade held in your honor. I’m afraid, however, that you will have to settle for less hoopla and glamour
in your waking life. You will merely be doing a fantastic job at tasks you usually perform competently. You will be
well-appreciated, well-treated, and well-rewarded. That’s not so bad, right?
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): “The thorn arms the roses,” says an old Latin motto. The astrological omens
PAY IT FORWARD
I’ve seen you out there in our fine city.
Lending a hand. Sharing a smile. Letting
others go first. Acting with patience and
kindness. We all need the example, so
Thank You!! You: Woman Me: Woman
Where: Downtown Eugene When: Last
Weekend
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