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EXUBERANT AND CURIOUS
HORSECOCK
I’m 5’4” bob-cut brunette with a penchant
for adventure and a great smile. I am in a
committed non-monogamous partnership,
but hoping to branch out and meet other
poly-friendly folks. gewilnian, 25, g
looking for someone to play with try new
things experiment. im 8inches witha mar-
ble implant.I know how to use it just need
someone who thinks they can handle it.
hunglikeahorse, 21, g
WOMEN SEEK ING MEN
LOTUSDAWN
looking for fun, spontaneous play, heavy
emphasis on intellectual stimulation/learn-
ing and implementing new things, and
laughing. lotusdawn, 41
SEXBLISS
HOUSEWIFEY NEEDIN NUTT
MEN SEEK ING WOMEN
Hey there! I’m 45 ,STD FREE,married,orally
wicked,
VIRGIN-TIGHT,
38D-33-
36,smoker,social drinker 420 friendly,
NEEDIN (badly),some new buddies 2
hookup,get neked, &copp a cosmic nutt.
dawny, 45
Nice clean guy looking for good clean fun.
Let’s make some noise! PS. I also like to get
dirty, ladies. CunningLinguist, 47
DARK SECRETS REVEALED
TO TRY THINGS
When faced with a challenge are you
resourceful? Do you play fair in your
quests? Perhaps you’re not above using
coercion? Will you implement control,seduc
tion,pain,pleasure...... Your Prize - Is
Revealed. Kittens_Secret, 48
NEED TRAINING
I need to find a Dom Man who can train me
to be his slave. I am a proffessional and
attractive..pictures available... Willing and
ready. trainme, 47
SEEKING NEW EXPERIENCES
thats what i need thats what i whant women
to help me find new sex adventure. rav-
madd, 42
WHAT I DO
male for discreet play with female, couple,
or group. If you aren’t willing to step outside
the box than you should stay in yours. nice
guy, I do good times. gllatino, 36
THAT’S MZBITCH
lookin for a delicious lady to unleash a night
of sexual ecstasy. maybe more than one
night, lets find out. no strings, lots of fun.
gato, 34, g
MEN SEEK ING MEN
CURIOUS
Bi-curious male, clean, fit, seeks beautiful
boy for first time encounter. I want to adore
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course. maxd, 42
MEN SEEK ING ?
I CAN BE?
FANTASY TITILLATIONS
no weird crap but im not a lame open to
suggestions .long and.. however u tell me
just do it. jtbills, 27
Looking for primarily women but open to all
others for email fantasy exchanges regard-
ing groups that include stories and scenari-
os involving all kinds of titillation. I love the
journey! PeckStrap, 63
FABULOUSEX CREATOR
WOMEN SEEK ING ?
Dominant woman interested in submissive
man, woman or couple for discrete play. I
adore pain sluts but abhor brats. Be real, be
truthful, or be on your way. MzBitch, 46,
LOVE
Eugene Weekly’s local dating site
I’m looking for an attractive girl who is
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25, g
HANDSOME OLD SENSUALIST
looking for a nice attractive, slender young
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I am a 22-year-old straight female. I used to babysit for a wealthy family, but their children have out-
grown babysitters. The dad of this family is very into martial arts/fighting and has invited me over
several times for “self-defense training.” I have accepted his invitations a few times, and it has al-
ways started off as a normal workout in their home gym — treadmill, weights, swimming laps — but
he is always pretty anxious to get to the self-defense part. Often he will blindfold me and then come
at me, and I must then wrestle my way out of the situation using the moves I’ve learned.
I did this a few times, Dan, but I found it a bit unsettling. However, he never touched me inappropri-
ately. Last time we did this, he told me he wanted to see how much pain he could take. He asked me to
kick him in the groin with no protection until he couldn’t take it anymore. I thought, “This is strange,”
but I was curious, so I did it. He was able to take it for a surprisingly long time. I haven’t been back
since, but for the last six months, he has been pestering me to come back. Recently, he suggested
that we have what he calls a “competition.” He will stand there, and I will kick him in the balls — or
anywhere else I want — and if he gives up, I get $150. If I give up, by getting too tired, I give him $20.
His wife knows about the workouts, but he said he doesn’t want me to tell her about the fighting.
My question is this: Is there a sexual component to this? I have never heard of anything like this be-
fore, and I find it odd. But I am a poor college student, and for $150, I’ll stand there fully clothed and
kick this guy in the balls! Please let me know your thoughts.
Will Kick Balls For Money
There are no nonsexual components to this, WKBFM, and if you’ve never heard of something like this
before, well, you must be a new reader.
What we’ve got here is a rich guy attempting to manipulate his kids’ former babysitter into doing sex
work for him — no, scratch that. What we’ve got here is a rich guy who has already manipulated his kids’
former babysitter into doing sex work for him, WKBFM, and that’s pretty fucking creepy. (Your previous
workouts with the blindfolds and the wrestling and the kicking? Unpaid sex work.) Don’t get me wrong: I
don’t think his ball-busting fetish is creepy. It’s extreme, as fetishes go, and there are definitely risks. But
the risks are his. Paying you to kick him in the nuts doesn’t put his wife at risk (swift-kick-to-sack is not a
known mode of STI transmission), it won’t take food out of his children’s mouths, and, as he presumably
has all the children he wants, ball-busting-induced sterility might be a blessing/vasectomy in disguise.
If you need the money, WKBFM, and you don’t think you’ll be scarred by the experience, tell the rich guy
you’ll consider doing this for him — you’ll come over, remain fully clothed, and kick him in the nuts — but
only if he levels with you: He’s getting off on this. If he can’t level with you, WKBFM, don’t do this.
You don’t want this rich asshole to think he’s successfully manipulated you into doing sex work for him,
because once the session is under way, you don’t want him thinking, “Well, if I could get her to do this, I
can probably get her to [remove her clothes, watch me masturbate, have sex with me].” If you go into a
ball-busting session without both of you having acknowledged what you’re actually doing — you’re sorta
selling sex, he’s definitely paying for sex — and he does try to get you to remove your clothes or watch
him masturbate or have sex with him, WKBFM, you may find it difficult to say no. Being direct with some-
one (“No, I’m not taking my clothes off, asshole!”) after you’ve accepted a dishonest premise (“Sure,
rich guy, this isn’t about sex, you’re just testing yourself!”) requires you to admit that you were being
dishonest, too. Most people are reluctant to admit to dishonesty, and a skilled manipulator will exploit
that inhibition to get what he wants.
So tell him you’ll play — you’ll bust his balls — but you’re not going to play along. He has to admit that
this is about sex and he has to agree to honor your conditions: Everything that happens is agreed to in
advance, no special requests during a session, he remains fully clothed, you remain fully clothed, no
recordings are made, and you get the $150 — make that $250 — whether or not he bails.
I am a 30-year-old straight man who has always known that he is a poly. The woman I love is not a
poly. She is a monogamous person. When we started being sexual, it was a strictly friends-with-
benefits arrangement, although a sexually exclusive one, at her insistence, and I agreed to that
because neither of us expected anything long-term to come of it. But we fell in love, and now I can’t
imagine life without her. She is amazing, and I love her like I’ve never loved any other woman. But
she has asked me to betray my sexual identity by remaining sexually exclusive. If I cannot commit
to that, she does not want to be with me. I am not asking the same of her: She does not have to sleep
with other people to keep me in her life. She is, however, insisting that I not sleep with other people
to keep her in my life. Can someone who is poly be happy with someone who isn’t?
Polyamorous Polymath
You are not “a poly.”
Poly is not a sexual identity, PP, it’s not a sexual orientation. It’s not something you are, it’s something
you do. There’s no such thing as a person who is “a poly,” just as there’s no such thing a person who is “a
monogamous.” Polyamorous and monogamous are adjectives, not nouns. There are only people — gay,
straight, bi — and some people are in monogamous relationships, some are in open relationships, some
are in polyamorous relationships, some are in monogamish relationships, some are in four-star-general
relationships. These are relationship models, PP, not sexual identities.
So the question isn’t “Can a poly be happy with a monogamous?” The question is can you, despite your
clear preference for nonmonogamous relationship models, be happy in this relationship? Do you love
your girlfriend so much that you’re willing to pay the price of admission that she’s demanding — you’re
willing to behave monogamously (adverb!) — in order to be with her? Yes or no?
Since your girlfriend has already indicated that she’s not willing to have a nonmonogamous relation-
ship with you (or anyone else), PP, the choice is yours to make. If you truly can’t live without her, if she’s
the-one-you’re-going-to-round-the-fuck-up-to-the-one, you’ll have to be monogamous. If that’s not
something you’re willing or able to do — and “willing” and “able” are two different criteria, and you’ll need
to make an honest self-assessment on both counts — then end this relationship and go find someone
whose romantic desires more closely align with your own.
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