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SEEKING FUN FEMALE
STICKY WAND
I am happily married, but need a
girlfriend to cuddle, send flowers
and cards Im laid back really just
looking for an ltr. I am confident
in myself. friendlybigurl, 31,
g , #105250
Looking for good time free lov-
ing with no attachments. Would
love a lover that is up for love
anytime because the favor will
be absorbed and released. Get
with me! cheesus, 20,
#106263
MAGICALSTUD
FUNTIMES
Just looking to meet new people
and have a fun time. frey-
lock111, 35, #106249
THINK U CAN HANDLE ME DEN
WEN FINNA SEE!! magic27, 20,
g , #106094
WET PUSSY
Looking for some fun. no compli-
cations. no drama. just SEX!!
love2suck,
33,
☎,
#106238
CRAFYGIRL
I’m in a committed non-monoga-
mous partnership. Curious...
CraftyGirl, 27, ☎, g ,
#105791
Seeking younger Sub, curious or
trainee. Rules, boundaries, disci-
pline. Not mean. Like thin and
thicker girls. About desires, 39,
attractive. Reply by mail to
“Non hard core Dom”
EW,
1251
Lincoln,
Eugene, OR 97401.
DOM BY NATURE
LUSTY, LUCIOUS, LOVELY
Looking for someone to get me
over my excess baggage. Slick,
31, ☎, #106057
NON HARDCORE DOM
SEEKS SUB
SEX POSITIVE NYMPHO
Impeccable hygiene is a must.
Intelligence preferred. Be sexu-
ally open, honest, and mature.
Into transvestites, groups, would
love to try a gang bang, into new
experiences. Sex positive, no
shame. I_want_it_all, 31,
#105142
Discrete professional looking for
a natural sub to satisfy our urges
and desires. Very much into
evolving the dynamic as we go,
so that each one gets what they
need. dombynature, 50,
#106257
SLUT WANTED
I want a fuck buddy, female, into
lots of sex, oral. greek,cowgirl,
doggie, toys, Dom,m and Sub
slut. dress up, oils, and massage,
tease play, Married or single.
johns8633, 50, #106265
HANDSOME OLD SENSUALIST
looking for a nice attractive,
slender young beauty or a stable
couple to play with. Disease free.
Not a freak. Let’s just have us
some pink, naked, squishy fun! :).
pure, 49, g , #101299
GIRL PLEASER
AZ PHENOMENAL FACIAL
FLIRTY FEMME 4U
Any butch bois out there who
know how to treat a lady? This
girl has got some needs that
only a strong dominant butch
can handle. Are you butch
enough? FlirtyFemme, 53,
g , #101518
HOT4U
Straight female seeking young
lesbians to teach me. I’ll be the
submissive one. I can host. I live
with my gay brother undergoing
MTF changeover who supports
me 100%. SassyGirl4U, 37,
g , #106134
WHATS UP???
would like a girl to play around
with.....long term or short term.
eugenechronic,
21,
#106275
NOSTRINGS ATTACHED SEX
Don’t know if this is for me? look-
ing for a good time with open
ppl. ill send pics if you hit me up.
Here’s the line someone bite....
LOL.
easyas123,
30,
#106270
THIRST FOR YOU
Oh yeah. cunning_linguist,
34, #106267
$PPQFS
% &
4 * ( /
1 ) 0 5 0 (
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PSDBMM
dirty little school slut trapped in
hairy man suit. can take any size,
any load. i like older men who
take 3 dicks on a long drive in
their van. AZgoodman, 26,
#106143
HANDSOME DAD SPANKS
Looking for a young man in need
of an over the knee, bare bot-
tomed spanking. Just like dad
used to give you. Slim and young
preferred. All considered. firm-
papa, 53, g , #106127
CURIOUS
Bi-curious male, clean, fit, seeks
beautiful boy for first time
encounter. I want to adore your
smooth, lean body. A lot to ask
for? Of course. maxd, 40, g ,
#103934
Though we are a couple, only I,
the girl, is looking for a top. I am
super submissive, into anything,
love to please...want to be your
slut. Please email me.
g ,
Kailie96,
36,
#106287
COUPLE MIX UP
My bf & I have been together for
a year & 1/2 now, and we’re want-
ing to mix things up a little with
another girl around our age, 20.
unblessedXheart, 20, g ,
#102204
COUPLES SEXCAPADES
very sexual kinky couple seeking
the same for a night of sexual
fun and mutual gradification and
multiple orgasms.Would love to
explore the posibilities another
couple would bring. her-
g ,
shey2664,
39,
#106224
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Savage Love
WORDS OF PURE WISDOM by Dan Savage
My husband and I recently realized that in order for us to remain happily married, we need to
fuck other people.
Enter the boyfriend. This 20-year-old hunk has opened the sexual fl oodgates. He’s gorgeous
and athletic and enthusiastic, he gets me off at least twice every time we get together, and tales of
our exploits have made things even hotter between my husband and me. Everybody’s happy!
So what’s the problem? Well, after two months of dating and numerous sexual encounters, my
new lover has yet to get an erection. I know he’s been able to get it up with previous partners, so I
suspect this has something to do with our situation. Maybe there’s a subconscious part of his brain
that doesn’t want to bone a married woman? I’ve made it clear to him that there is no pressure
and that I am more than satisfi ed. He insists that he is very attracted to me and that our current
activities (lots of oral and hands everywhere) are incredibly satisfying.
Am I missing something, Dan? How can I coax this young man’s erection out of hiding?
Nouveau Mrs. Robinson
Before I get to your question, NMR, I need to address the recent Arnold
Schwarzeneggerunpleasantness.
I’m getting a lot of mail from people insisting that it’s all my fault. The affair, the love child,
the split with Maria Shriver—I’m apparently to blame for everything, save Arnold’s oldest son’s
slammin’, nearly legal bod (www.tinyurl.com/3zsdmjf). This is the case because (1) I’m a big
proponent of nonmonogamous/monogamish relationships and (2) aging Hollywood action stars
don’t get erections without checking in with me fi rst. And look where the nonmonogamy stuff
I’m always pushing got Arnold! Look at the chaos that nonmonogamy creates! Failed marriages!
Devastated children! Scandalous scandals!
In my defense, ladies and gentlemen of the angry e-mob, I would point out that Arnold wasn’t
in a nonmonogamous relationship. Arnold was in a monogamous relationship. Arnold failed
at monogamy. He did not succeed at nonmonogamy. If there is a lesson to be drawn from the
Schwarzeneggerunpleasantness, it’s not that honest nonmonogamy never works. Rather, it is the
critical importance—particularly during adulterous heterosexual encounters—of anal intercourse.
And please bear in mind, e-mobsters, that you rarely hear about honest nonmonogamous
relationships that work, to say nothing of marriages like Mr. and Mrs. NMR’s, i.e., marriages that were
saved by nonmonogamy. Successfully nonmonogamous straight couples typically aren’t out to their
friends, families, and coworkers. We tend to learn that someone we know is in a nonmonogamous
relationship when it implodes and people—both inside and outside the relationship—cast around,
looking for something or someone to blame. If the couple was nonmonogamous, nonmonogamy
gets the blame, even if it had nothing to do with the breakup.
On to your problem, NMR…
What a delightful problem to have! A gorgeous, athletic, and enthusiastic hunk with a hard
dick is better than a gorgeous, athletic, and enthusiastic hunk with a soft dick, I’ll grant you. But
better a gorgeous, athletic, and enthusiastic hunk with a soft dick than no gorgeous, athletic, and
enthusiastic hunk at all, amirite?
And while I can’t tell you exactly what’s wrong with your hunk’s dick—it could very well be the
infamous limpothalamus (that would be the part of the brain that doesn’t want to bone a married
woman; most men don’t have one)—I can tell you that you’re doing everything right. You’re not
pressuring him, you’re taking pleasure in him regardless, and you’re not neglecting your husband.
And if your hunk was getting it up for his previous partners, it’s only a matter of time before he’s
getting it up for you.
But was he getting it up for his previous partners? Unless you’ve seen some video—and that’s
video we’d all like to see—all we have to go on is his word, NMR, and he could be lying. Young
hunks with erectile problems, too embarrassed and/or ashamed to admit they have a problem, will
sometimes lie to their partners and refuse to speak to doctors. But your hunk has someone older
and wiser telling him what to do, NMR, and you’re going to tell him to talk with a doctor.
Is it better to stay with your overweight wife—who happens to be the mother of your infant
daughter—and cheat on her to get sexual gratifi cation (and be a shit of a husband) or leave her
(and be a shit of a father)?
Almost Twice The Wife
Cheating shit or leaving shit—are those your only options?
If they are, ATTW, then stay and cheat. Abandoning an infant—to say nothing of abandoning
someone with an infant—is a shit move. So is cheating on the mother of your infant daughter, of
course, but it’s slightly less shitty.
Here’s another option: You could go without for six months or a year—you know, like most new
parents.
Backing way up: You were presumably attracted to your wife before the baby… otherwise there
would be no baby, right? And presumably, the mother of your infant daughter is going without
right now, too, as she’s probably too exhausted to bother with sex. Because she just had a baby.
She also may not be feeling it for her asshole husband, a man who she senses doesn’t fi nd her
attractive in her current state—a state he helped put her in.
Take a little responsibility here, ATTW: You knocked the wife up knowing that pregnancy and
its tragic aftermath, aka “parenting,” leave new moms with very little time for the gym. If you
expected your wife to bounce back to her pre-baby weight in 10 weeks, like some sort of celebrity
mom, then you needed to get her two nannies, a personal trainer, and a full-time nutritionist.
Perhaps I’m being too hard on you, ATTW. Your letter—reproduced here in its entirety—is all I
had to go on. For all I know, your wife is one of those lousy spouses who abandon routine physical
maintenance once the fi rst kid arrives, because, hey, now you’re stuck! Forgoing routine physical
maintenance is the mother of all take-you-for-granted moves, one that quickly kills desire and
slowly smothers love, and it can constitute grounds for cheating and/or leaving. (Normal and
natural aging, health issues that make routine maintenance impossible, etc. do not by themselves
constitute grounds for cheating and/or leaving.) But it’s too soon to know if your wife is one of
those lousy take-you-for-granted spouses, ATTW, as your daughter is still an infant.
Masturbate, help out, make sure your wife has the free time she needs to take care of herself,
and you may fi nd that you don’t have to be any sort of shit.
I’m writing about the “Choicer Challenge” you’ve issued to all the bigots out there who say that
being gay is a choice. I think you’ve set yourself up for a possible failure here, Dan.
I’m a straight guy. I am also a stubborn motherfucker. If I were one of those choicers, Dan, I
would suck your dick just to win the argument. That’s why the Choicer Challenge should say that
they have to suck you off while maintaining a glass-cutting boner. I could probably will myself to
blow you to prove a point, but willing myself to get hard during it? Not possible!
Bone Machine
Good point, BM. The Choicer Challenge is hereby amended to include the production of a
glass-cutting boner while blowing me. I’m waiting for your call, John “Choicer” Cummins.
Find the Savage Lovecast (my weekly podcast) every Tuesday at thestranger.com/savage.
mail@savagelove.net
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EUGENE WEEKLY JUNE 2, 2011 35