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SEX POSITIVE NYMPHO
Impeccable hygiene is a must.
Intelligence preferred. Be sexu-
ally open, honest, and mature.
Into transvestites, groups, would
love to try a gang bang, into new
experiences. Sex positive, no
shame. I_want_it_all, 30,
#105142
SEXPOTTHUNDERPUSSY
DISNEYLOVER
CHEESTCAKEFACE
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm-
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onthewall, 84, #105920
CRAFYGIRL
I’m in a committed non-monoga-
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CraftyGirl, 27, ☎, g ,
#105791
DISCREET FUN
i’m an attractive, single mom
looking for discreet fun...would
enjoy an attractive, dominant,
personality as i tend to 2 b more
submissive...send me a msg and
lets chat! Sammi, 43, g ,
#105766
ADVENTUROUS, EXCITED,
EAGER
I’m looking for a guy who’s domi-
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32, g , #105553
HOT BI-GIRL
CURIOUSFOREXPLORATION
lookin 2meet a hot, spunky, fun-
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looking for an older man wanting
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funside86, 24, #105986
BIGBOOBS, SEXY, FUN
just moved back to engene and
don’t know where to start. look-
ing for a girl to hang out with
and more. i’m 29, with long
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#104676
SEXY BUSTY BABE
Needing someone to show me
the ropes. Im not submissive just
new to this. littleone, 20,
#103646
WANNA HAVE FUN
shy person that wants to experi-
ment. never been with a girl but
would like to be either in charge
or have someone show me the
ropes. shypurple, 21, ☎,
#103175
LOOSE-WOMAN WITH QUES-
TIONABLE-MORALS
I am “America” looking for
“Columbus” to DISCOVER ME! I
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BUCK, 20, #105539
UNPREDICTABLE HUNGRY-
STRIPER PROWLING
NEVER TRIED HELP!
Are you a take charge woman
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nated by a female. Loved to be
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Pegging! bus4fun, 48, ☎,
#106005
BROWNCHICKENBROWNCOW!
Looking for fun. Any kind of fun.
Get in contact with me!
uoduksgreen,
25,
#106001
I am a dominant male looking for
a sub to engage in a long term
relationship. Kathleen where are
you and you need to reach me
ASAP. mrpeabody, 50, g ,
#105983
You: Post ads here. Me: Journalist
wondering what motivates you
to do so. Inquisitivewriter,
22, g , #105919
I WANT PLEASURE
I’m bored & tired of this vanilla
world. I like 2 get what I want &
please others. Live life to the full
extent of what you imagine &
what you want. DESIRE, 27,
g , #101108
Does your guitar need a check up?
“
LET’S HAVE FUN.
hi! respectful, loving, compas-
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phile, 21, g , #106016
DOMINAT MALE
WONDERING ABOUT YOU...
My honey-pot is low and needs
something sticky. Submissive at
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Preferably a bucking bronco ;-).
I’m a saucy whench boys, I need
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Bi-curious male, clean, fit, seeks
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#103934
YOU AND I
Hey sex is good. We should have
it...U and I. We can try this we,
can try that. Mother earth wants
this. hereiamiam, 26,
#105980
ROCK YOUR WORLD
im just looking for some fun, lets
make some videos. =]. rideme,
18, #105979
COUPLE SEEKING LONG-TERM
We are fun-loving drama-free
couple. We are looking for a
long-term friend, lover, and part-
ner. Ideally a triad. You should
be fun, drama-free, and able to
hold an intelligent conversation.
MaxKarma, 28, g ,
#106011
ARE YOU #3?
Husband and wife team, both
bisexual, both poly, looking for a
third. The preferences listed
aren’t the be all end all, most
important above what’s listed is
personality. Buns, 25, g ,
#105992
UNEXPERIENCED
Unexperienced young couple
seeks dominant Male/Female or
couple to teach us how to have
fun and wants to play. lit-
tlered, 18, #105950
POLYAMORYHONEYMANKO
Seeking fun in the form of sex,
it’s nothing but lust and being
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Special guest
t No
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Hank Shreve To
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Blues Showcase
Presents
PHOTO BY BOOGIE KING STEVE
TY CURTIS
The
WORDS OF PURE WISDOM by Dan Savage
I am a straight man. From high school through college and after, I loved me some women.
Then I met my present girl 10 years ago. I fell head over heels for her. I still love her. But, little
by little, she has become boring to me. Our sex life has cooled. Days run together with mun-
dane activities like watching TV, going to the store, and hanging out with our kids.
We own a house, we’re fi nancial stable, we look very traditional. But I am far from conserva-
tive. I love nightlife, crazy friends, and good drink. She was aware of this when we met because
we ran in the same circles. My boredom is compounded by a craving for sex with other women.
It doesn’t matter who — the girl at the coffee shop, the checker at Whole Foods, every chick at
the gym — I’m up to my eyeballs in covet.
I want out. I want to be a father to my kids and take care of my wife fi nancially. But I want
out. I am a few years from 40. What is the best course of action?
Too Young To Flail
One day, I’m gonna throw my hands in the air and declare that, from that blessed day
forward, I shall no longer tinker with the machinery of monogamy. That day hasn’t arrived, as I
still have mortgage payments to make and opposite marriages to save — so here’s a little tinkle
for you:
You say you want out, TYTF, but are you sure about that? In her book I Don’t: A Contrarian
History of Marriage, Susan Squire asks: “Why does society consider it more moral for you to
break up a marriage, go through a divorce, disrupt your children’s lives maybe forever, just to
be able to fuck someone with whom the fucking is going to get just as boring as it was with
the fi rst person before long?” (Emphasis added.)
Writing about Representative Christopher “Craigslist Congressman” Lee last week on Bal-
loon Juice — a blog I read daily — BJ contributor “Mastermix” said: “If we want to do something
about the high divorce rate, we might want to get real [about] the role of a discreet, mutually-
agreed-upon affair as a safety valve.”
In other words, TYTF, destroy the only home your kids have known and put yourself and
the wife through the hell of divorce, and here’s what happens next: You dog around for a few
years and before long you shack up with a new woman — a woman who might want or already
has a kid or two of her own — and a few years after that, you’re trapped in another monoga-
mous relationship that bores you, and a few years after that, you’re writing to ask if you
should put your second wife and your new kids through the pain of a divorce all so you can
make an embarrassing pass at a barista who has zero interest in fucking you.
Instead of putting your current family — and your hypothetical second family and that
poor barista — through that, TYTF, why not risk leveling with the wife you’ve got now? Your
marriage is already on the ropes, TYTF, so you don’t have a lot to lose. Ask to have a “safety
valve” installed on your marriage in the form of permission to have a discreet, mutually-
agreed-upon affair, should the right opportunity/barista present itself/herself. It may not be
a pleasant thing for your wife to hear, but “I’m leaving you to go fuck a barista to be named
later” won’t be music to her ears, either.
She may surprise you, TYTF. It’s entirely possible — I hope you’re sitting down for this —
that you bore her just as much as she bores you. If she’s itching for a few adventures of her
own, social and sexual, then spend whatever money you were planning to spend on lawyers
and counseling for your kids on fl ying grandparents in to look after the kids while you two
head out for a weekend away.
But if all she wants is to stay at home in front of the TV with the kids, tell her that to
preserve your sanity and, paradoxically, your marriage, you’re going to go out and have some
adventures on your own.
If she leaves you over it, TYTF, then you got what you wanted: out.
I’m a 31-year-old lesbian. My girlfriend is in her 30s, but save for a few one-night stands,
she has never been with a woman before. I’ve never had better sex than the sex I’m having with
her. When I try to talk to her about this, she gets anxious and makes self-deprecatory com-
ments. I want to be with her for the long haul — our dreams fi t together — I just need to fi gure
out how to communicate with her about how great our sex is. Got any advice?
Communication Breakdown
Yeah, CB, I’ve got some advice for you: Shut the fuck up.
I had this awesome new boyfriend once, and the sex was so freaking great that I felt
compelled to communicate with him about how great it was. “This is so great,” I would tell him.
“Let’s try to fi gure out where all this greatness is coming from!” But he didn’t enjoy talking
about sex — particularly while we were having sex — and he got so annoyed with my attempts
to fi gure out where all this greatness was coming from that he eventually asked/advised/or-
dered me to shut the fuck up.
Keep fucking the girlfriend’s fucking brains right fucking out, CB, but shut the fuck up.
Odds are that she’ll learn to relax and open up about sex, like my boyfriend did. But in the
meantime, CB, try to resist the urge to lesbian this thing into the ground by communicating it
to death.
For several months now, I’ve had a growing attraction to one of my good male friends. I am
an open bisexual male, and my friend is “straight.” We’ve had relations — me blowing him, him
jerking me — but he’s adamant that he is not attracted to males at all. He nevertheless sleeps
with me in my bed when he spends the night.
The plot thickens: A couple days ago, my “straight” crush ordered an eight-inch dildo, mold-
ed from a real dick, complete with balls! He got it to use on himself! He says because there’s
not going to be another male present when he uses it, and thus no romance, the act will be
“straight.” I defi ne being sexual as enjoying not only the sexual interactions possible between
preferred genders, but also the emotional satisfaction, or romance. Does he have a point?
Absolutely Hate Acronyms
DANCER
AUDITIONS
465>,+ ;()3,+(5*,:
Savage Love
Wasn’t there “another male present” when you were giving him blowjobs, AHA, and he was
jerking you?
Maybe if your “straight” friend wasn’t accepting blowjobs from another man and swore on
a stack of vintage Playboys that he would be fantasizing about a lady-parts-having woman-
person pegging him when he jams that dildo up his ass, then maybe — maybe — he could be
believed when he claims to be a straight dude into anal penetration. But a guy who fails to
mention a burning desire for pussy to shore up his straight cred — particularly in conversation
with a dude who blows him — and instead falls back on a lame “no homo” rationalization (“Hey,
it’s not like the dildo brought me fl owers or anything gay like that!”) is a lot of things, but
straight ain’t one of ’em.
If your straight friend manages to fuck some sense into himself on that dildo, AHA, you
might want to take a turn on it yourself.
Find the Savage Lovecast (my weekly podcast) every Tuesday at thestranger.com/savage.
mail@savagelove.net
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EUGENE WEEKLY FEBRUARY 17, 2011 35